Does hard-to-get work?
 

Alright, I've been thinking about this for a while. Does hard-to-get actually work?

I know this seems infantile, but I was talking to a buddy and we agreed that if you know a girl wants you, you sort of lose interest.

So in saying this, if you show a girl/guy that you're indifferent whether or not you're into them or not, does this peak their interest? Does it leave them wanting more?

Its all relative. It doesnt work with me. If a women doesnt come off as interested I go elsewhere because I see no reason to work to get someone when I dont know if theyre worth the effort or not. With friends of mine it works like a charm. Some people enjoy the hunt by nature, some couldnt care less about it. Depends on the person.

Re: Does hard-to-get work?
 

Not me. I've been floored the few times a girl came on to me. I will always be interested in someone who's intereeted in me and makes thee effort to let me know about it. I despise the hard to get thing. I undestand not wanting to appear easy or desperate but there's no need to play games. You like someone and they approach you, go for it.

i like hard to get, it adds a little more mystery to you and plus makes the girl value you more, and if you continue to impress her without even talking to her you'll reach a point where she'll approach you and you dont have to do any work

Yeah, that's what I was thinking Afterburn.

My tactic has always been to make my physical interests known from the start. If they respond well, I continue to do so until things happen. There is not an instance in which this has not worked.

Just uh, don't try to put the moves on a girl while her boyfriend is asleep upstairs. Be a bit more subtle about it. Insistence doesn't work.

(When I play hard to get, it's only because I hate my pursuer. It does make them more interested, but when I threaten violence, they stop.)

Re: Re: Does hard-to-get work?
 

I couldn't agree more, there are enough things to figure out about someone to keep things interesting... Once I know someone is interested I can focus on making things fun... Hard-to-get behavior adds frustration and uncertainty to the mix - very unpleasant

Well I am getting nowhere with this girl, even though she has expressed interest, by using my conventional methods (letting her know how I feel). So I guess I'll just play HTG and if that doesn't work, I really haven't lost very much since my previous methods weren't working anyway.

HTG does work. I have never been able to play that game effectively, but I saw my sister-in-law land her husband using this. On the other hand, playing HTG can have some repercussions. Frankly most couples never get beyond a surface understanding of each other, and this is due to not being honest in their communications. If you want to reach a deep understanding of each other, you have to be able to communicate effectively. The times my wife and I have had problems is when she might not completely "know" how the relationship is going. By talking about it a lot and in effect not playing HTG, we get along so much better.

*note to self: stay away from bloodslick* ;)

It works great for me. I play hard-to-get, and I am hard-to-get...oh...wait...that wasn't the idea. Damn!

it works in the movies...

but in real life, there isnt enough time, and theres a lot more people to choose from than a couple 3-d characters in a script.

so, no.

There was this girl at school a couple of years ago who I was quite interested in, and we flirted for awhile until she suddenly started playing hard to get. This is where i decided screw this and persued some other girl who was more much receptive to my advances. I could tell the other girl was jealous (you know how you can just tell). I broke up with the chick after 3 or so months and the other chick started to flirt again. Then she did the hard to get ruitine again, so once again I said screw this, and I've never talked to that girl since.

I hate that shit. If I don't think she's interested I'm not going to put myself through all that.

Maybe play hard to get at first but you have to let him know you're interested.

I don't even bother with girls that play hard to get, there are plently that'll make it known if they like you. I'm lazy, I don't want to spend time chasing something that probably won't be worth all that effort anyways.

I've played hard to get when I thought I was the cat's meow. After blowing chance after chance I decided to be myself and kick the imaginary pedestal of megalomania from beneath me.

Now I embrace everyone who embraces me.

I don't know....

It seems I get more "offers" (I don't know what else to call it :) ) when I'm not really looking.

I met my g/f cuz she came after me. Well she was in my math class and didn't really say much, then we started talking cuz we walked the same direction to our classes and one day she was all "Do you know your phone # isn't in the phone book?". I was like yea, how'd you know....come to find out she spent ALL weekend(classes on mon and wed) calling everyone with my last name in the phone book trying to find me. I was so surprised that someone would go that distance that it made me very attracted to her(she already looks good so it just made it more.)

I don't really think HTG works, I just let things happen if they happen.

I've never liked the "hard to get" thing. I fuckin HATE mind games in general, and playing hard to get is really the king of all the mind games.

Quit playing coy. You play coy in sarcasm if you want to, but only after you're already IN the relationship. This business of acting like you're not interested when you ARE interested is asinine and only screws people up.

PLEASE- LADIES- (and I guess guys too, although the guys don't matter to me, lol) STOP with the hard-to-get! There are other ways of making guys earn your affections, but acting like you don't care they exist only deflates egos, and for some people, this can be devastating.

Just smile. Give us a hint. Something. Thanks! ;)

I've always used tease/hard to get tactics. It seems to work well for me although I know it doesnt work for everyone and you have to know when to give a little bit or the other person will just think you hate them.

Keep 'em coming fellas. I am only considering HTG as a final option. I've tried other methods, as I've said.

I can't describe how much I hate the hard to get bullshit. If its not hard enough to be male and decypher all the mixed signals some women send, then they start in with this whole hard to get, coy, crap. I hate it.

Just say what you think and want. It takes less energy and gets you where you want faster. Mind games suck.

I'm not some sort of animal. Neither are you. We think and we speak, so let's talk it out. Know what I mean?

I don't press the subject, if she seems disinterested there's no chance of me continuing pursuit... not that i really initiate anything anyways... but hard to get really annoys me.

being coy is one thing, playing hard-to-get only works when it's obvious that's what he/she is doing, PLAYING.

I think it when I'm not really sure if the girl likes me or not, it makes it all that much more satisfying when I eventually get with her.

I think hard-to-get is just an exercise in narcissism. You know that someone wants you, but you need to be convinced that you are worth it to someone else. If you play hard-to-get it'll probably kick you in the ass. There is a playful way to do it, and that's OK, but if your doing it hardcore, you deserve to get nothing out of it.

Megalomania is fun! Why did you stop?
That's the bottom line.

Hard-to-get is hard to do...I'm not a person who can play...or likes it when people play...mind games relating to relationships. I think I may be the last person who believes simples honesty is the way to go. I mean, life's confusing, and relationships are hard. Why complicated it?

err,...uh,...I didn't,...I haven't. Only stop long enough to get laid then it's back in the saddle.:D

I am a walking example of how hard-to-get can fuck you over. I played hard to get for like 2months with someone then eventually i sort of liked her but then she started either playing it or just lost interest, so i have to either do more work or give up. i chose give up.

Fuck games.

I couldn't be bothered chasing someone who is playing hard-to-get. I take people at face value. If they're showing me they're not interested, then I'll look for someone else who is interested. The best way to arouse my interest is to show some interest. The best way to keep it is to not then blow hot and cold.

couldn't have said it better myself.

Hard to get never supossedly works with guys... but you have to be well above-average looking. I haven't had any success with playing hard to get, but I am only average looking. My friend, who is a very good looking but very shy guy, gets hit on all the time and the more he resists girls the harder he tries. If it works for you, go for it. If not, find a different plan.

hmm, i never get hit on by anyone but girls glance at me and hold my glance sometimes, i guess i'm just avergae looking

that's it.

At some point the games won't matter, it's called love.

It depends on what and who you're looking for - playing hard to get will get you lonely,very lonely in fact - there's so much more to share with one an other ones you get connected - playing hard to get doesn't get you nowhere close, even if it would work in the long term, you and she/him would be stuck with tons of why's and how come's - why would you want to go trough that?

John Paul the 2nd is hard to get, and I'm sure there are tons of nuns who are out to get him, but I think the "mystification" would be to much for them to handle if they'de finaly get a 101 - if you want someone to like you for who you are, then there is no fun in playing games, keep the game playing for the moment you do get to know her/him - by that time you'll have gained his/her trust, and you'll be able to play around with it and enjoy stretching a few more boundires than you will by playing the "mystic one".