Reciprocation - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Arrion · 12-10-2003, 06:55 PM

Ok, I need a little advice from all of you crazy geniuses out there. I've been in a relationship for about 3 months now. We are still in high school and she's not ready for sex but always asks me for oral. So being the good boyfriend I am, I do it, but I never get anything in return. How do I bring this up? I don't want to look like an asshole that's pushing her into things, but then again, I don't wanna wind up with the short end of the stick from here on out. It would be really nice if she returned the favor without me making her. What should I do?

frozenstellar · 12-10-2003, 07:17 PM

if she's asking for oral, whats to stop you from asking? whats good enough for her, is surely good enough for you. its understandble she isn't ready for sex - many girls at highschool aren't, but enjoy other sexual activities, but to me, if she is willing to receive, she must be willing to give. its a two way street after all.

omega2K4 · 12-10-2003, 09:23 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by frozenstellar
if she's asking for oral, whats to stop you from asking? whats good enough for her, is surely good enough for you. its understandble she isn't ready for sex - many girls at highschool aren't, but enjoy other sexual activities, but to me, if she is willing to receive, she must be willing to give. its a two way street after all.

Frozenstellar hit the nail on the head with his reply.

kwoodmex · 12-10-2003, 09:39 PM

it's definitely a mutual enjoyment thing. if she's gettin some, you should be too.

feelgood · 12-10-2003, 09:59 PM

There's an old saying: "Tits for Tats"

numist · 12-10-2003, 10:58 PM

an eye for an eye makes the world go blind....

but at least your palms wont be hairy...

analog · 12-11-2003, 01:14 AM

Many women go their whole lives without really liking the whole "blowjob" experience. If she hasn't offered, she may not feel comfortable with it... or just not know about it at all. Depends on the upbringing.

Talk to her. Start now, because later on down the road when you get into the real thing, you'll want to have had this experience of talking with girls about intimate things out of the way already. And now, you have so relatively little to lose.

Let us know. Good luck.

tritium · 12-11-2003, 02:13 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by analog
Many women go their whole lives without really liking the whole "blowjob" experience. If she hasn't offered, she may not feel comfortable with it... or just not know about it at all. Depends on the upbringing.

Talk to her. Start now, because later on down the road when you get into the real thing, you'll want to have had this experience of talking with girls about intimate things out of the way already. And now, you have so relatively little to lose.

Let us know. Good luck.

... then she shouldn't be asking someone else to get "into harms way" as it were. I'd talk to her and find out what's going on. If she's not willing to do ANYTHING for you, then I wouldn't feel obliged to do anything for her. Not sure where you are in your relationship, but it is a two way street as previously stated...

Charlatan · 12-11-2003, 02:41 AM

...if it turns out that she really isn't into giving head then the least she should do is provide you with a servicable hand job... quid pro quo

absorbentishe · 12-11-2003, 07:36 AM

Maybe in her mind, if you're not asking, you're not wanting. When you're out and about on a date, no where near any sexual activity, just bring it up to her, in a nice way, and let her know your feelings about what you're doing, and what you'd like as well. She should be understanding of your feelings. And if she doesn't want to do that, maybe she'll do something else instead.

jw_toyboy · 12-11-2003, 06:32 PM

Ok you've got a few options Arrion. You can lay down the law and say and make it clear that the street goes both ways - risking offending and even losing her.
Or my way of approaching the situation is to give her some damn good oral (have you even given this girl an orgasm?). Read up on the net and show her the time of her life. Chances are it will provide her with more than enough incentive to reciprocate.
I've been with a few girls her maintained that they only wanted some oral, but after some good muff diving efforts she was practically begging for more and one even gave me the best BJ I've ever had as a reward.
Also just ask her what more you can do to please her.

Craven Morehead · 12-11-2003, 06:38 PM

Next time she asks come back with "Hey, let's 69" Would be kind "of hard for her to say "no, just eat my pussy" And if she did, at least it would be a good time to talk about it.

good luck, think you might like my name

moonstrucksoul · 12-11-2003, 07:13 PM

Quote:

Or my way of approaching the situation is to give her some damn good oral (have you even given this girl an orgasm?). Read up on the net and show her the time of her life. Chances are it will provide her with more than enough incentive to reciprocate.

Quote:

Next time she asks come back with "Hey, let's 69" Would be kind "of hard for her to say "no, just eat my pussy" And if she did, at least it would be a good time to talk about it.

i think that is the best advice you are gonna get

BooRadley · 12-12-2003, 10:00 PM

Put out or get out. Cheat on her with her good friends. Whatever. I've seen this happen too many times.
NEXT!!!

Think about it. A blowjob takes < 10 minutes. You probably eat her out for half an hour or more at a time. Who exactly is placing unfair demands on this relationship?

Heres a hint. It's not you.

james t kirk · 12-15-2003, 08:22 AM

There are three kinds of women out there when it comes to oral sex.

1. Hates to do it, never does it, probably never will.

2. Will do it to please you, but doesn't really enjoy it, but doesn't dislike it enough not to do it.

3. Loves it. Loves cock, loves sucking cock.

I have met all three types. Obviously, No. 3 is the best way to go and believe me, there are lots of them out there.

No. 2's are the ones you have to watch out for because the odds of her becoming a No. 3 are slim to none, while the odds of her becoming a No. 1 with time are much more great.

You are probably with a No. 1, or a latent No. 2 at best (I say this because you are young and she probably hasn't come into her cock smoking years yet, but she will never be a No. 3.)

I truly believe that a woman being a No. 3 is something they are born with.

Yours wasn't.

The question is, "when they were handing out the cock love skills, was your girl holding the door?"

My advice,,,,

Take it for what its worth, you're so young, it won't matter in the grand scheme of your life.

But in the future, here's a tip for you........

If you are with a woman, and at some point, either when you are talking sex on the phone, or when she's a little drunk, or you are getting to know each other in a carnal fashion, if she SAYS, that is she herself says, "I love sucking cock" (and this has happened to me on a few occasions)

BINGO, you have a No. 3.

You have arrived at the promised land my son and this too was good.

gabshu · 12-15-2003, 12:56 PM

There a little bit too much testosterone in this discussion, so here's my female bit.
IF SHE DOESN'T WANNA BLOW YOU DON'T MAKE HER
Don't tell her that you are doing all these good things and she's terrible. If she gives in this way, then she'll probably be traumatized for a while (speaking from experience). Girls at that age aren't usually as terribly horny as guys. If you like the girl stay with her, if what you want is a blow job, then I'm sure you can find plenty of girls at your schools that will blow you.

The only sane advice in here is from ToyBoy, don't force her, don't pressure her. If you don't like giving her oral then stop.

ninety09 · 12-15-2003, 01:15 PM

I've been in a somewhat similar situation.. Guess some girls are just selfish. Maybe they just don't realize it, oh well.. As others said, just talk about it to her, but don't force her to do something she doesn't want to do.

water_boy1999 · 12-15-2003, 03:50 PM

Both of you are still quite young. You are just now beginning to realize what a wonderful world of sex we have out there for the taking. Be patient with her. I remember being young once...er....eh hem....I mean, I remember those pre-sex days when each and every new experience took some warming up to. Getting my first blow job, eating my first beaver, getting my nuts....oh, you get the point. She is still in that mode where she is warming up to the idea of giving her first blow job. Be patient, she will come around. (pun not intended)

phaedrus · 12-15-2003, 04:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by gabshu
The only sane advice in here is from ToyBoy, don't force her, don't pressure her. If you don't like giving her oral then stop.

No. It's not about coercing her; it isn't really even about the blowjob. It's about communication, actually the lack there of. Any advice that circumvents open discussion between the two is less than good advice. If she is mature enough to receive oral sex, then she should be mature enough to handle a conversation about it.

Cheesebreath · 12-15-2003, 06:35 PM

Another female point of view; maybe she just doesn't know what to do and is worried about looking like a fool. You should open the lines of communication. Even if you don't stay with this girl, it's never too early to start talking about things like this to get more comfortable with it. Good luck.

12-10-2003, 06:55 PM	#1 (permalink)
Arrion Upright	Reciprocation Ok, I need a little advice from all of you crazy geniuses out there. I've been in a relationship for about 3 months now. We are still in high school and she's not ready for sex but always asks me for oral. So being the good boyfriend I am, I do it, but I never get anything in return. How do I bring this up? I don't want to look like an asshole that's pushing her into things, but then again, I don't wanna wind up with the short end of the stick from here on out. It would be really nice if she returned the favor without me making her. What should I do? __________________ I think I am. Therefore I am. I think

12-10-2003, 09:59 PM	#5 (permalink)
feelgood Free Mars! Location: I dunno, there's white people around me saying "eh" all the time	There's an old saying: "Tits for Tats" __________________ Looking out the window, that's an act of war. Staring at my shoes, that's an act of war. Committing an act of war? Oh you better believe that's an act of war

12-11-2003, 02:41 AM	#9 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	...if it turns out that she really isn't into giving head then the least she should do is provide you with a servicable hand job... quid pro quo __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

12-15-2003, 12:56 PM	#16 (permalink)
gabshu Psycho Location: The capital of the free world??	There a little bit too much testosterone in this discussion, so here's my female bit. IF SHE DOESN'T WANNA BLOW YOU DON'T MAKE HER Don't tell her that you are doing all these good things and she's terrible. If she gives in this way, then she'll probably be traumatized for a while (speaking from experience). Girls at that age aren't usually as terribly horny as guys. If you like the girl stay with her, if what you want is a blow job, then I'm sure you can find plenty of girls at your schools that will blow you. The only sane advice in here is from ToyBoy, don't force her, don't pressure her. If you don't like giving her oral then stop. __________________ Go Kool Aid. OH YEAAHH http://www.retrocrush.com/archive2003/koolaid/

12-15-2003, 01:15 PM	#17 (permalink)
ninety09 Flavour of the Weak Location: Canada	I've been in a somewhat similar situation.. Guess some girls are just selfish. Maybe they just don't realize it, oh well.. As others said, just talk about it to her, but don't force her to do something she doesn't want to do. Last edited by ninety09; 12-15-2003 at 01:19 PM..

12-10-2003, 07:17 PM	#2 (permalink)
frozenstellar Without Wings Location: Australia	if she's asking for oral, whats to stop you from asking? whats good enough for her, is surely good enough for you. its understandble she isn't ready for sex - many girls at highschool aren't, but enjoy other sexual activities, but to me, if she is willing to receive, she must be willing to give. its a two way street after all.

12-10-2003, 09:39 PM	#4 (permalink)
kwoodmex Crazy	it's definitely a mutual enjoyment thing. if she's gettin some, you should be too.

12-10-2003, 10:58 PM	#6 (permalink)
numist Banned Location: UCSD, 510.49 miles from my love	an eye for an eye makes the world go blind.... but at least your palms wont be hairy...

12-11-2003, 01:14 AM	#7 (permalink)
analog Banned	Many women go their whole lives without really liking the whole "blowjob" experience. If she hasn't offered, she may not feel comfortable with it... or just not know about it at all. Depends on the upbringing. Talk to her. Start now, because later on down the road when you get into the real thing, you'll want to have had this experience of talking with girls about intimate things out of the way already. And now, you have so relatively little to lose. Let us know. Good luck.

12-11-2003, 07:36 AM	#10 (permalink)
absorbentishe Boy am I horny today Location: T O L E D O, Toledo!!	Maybe in her mind, if you're not asking, you're not wanting. When you're out and about on a date, no where near any sexual activity, just bring it up to her, in a nice way, and let her know your feelings about what you're doing, and what you'd like as well. She should be understanding of your feelings. And if she doesn't want to do that, maybe she'll do something else instead.

12-11-2003, 06:32 PM	#11 (permalink)
jw_toyboy Tilted Location: Australia	Ok you've got a few options Arrion. You can lay down the law and say and make it clear that the street goes both ways - risking offending and even losing her. Or my way of approaching the situation is to give her some damn good oral (have you even given this girl an orgasm?). Read up on the net and show her the time of her life. Chances are it will provide her with more than enough incentive to reciprocate. I've been with a few girls her maintained that they only wanted some oral, but after some good muff diving efforts she was practically begging for more and one even gave me the best BJ I've ever had as a reward. Also just ask her what more you can do to please her.

12-11-2003, 06:38 PM	#12 (permalink)
Craven Morehead Custom User Title	Next time she asks come back with "Hey, let's 69" Would be kind "of hard for her to say "no, just eat my pussy" And if she did, at least it would be a good time to talk about it. good luck, think you might like my name

12-12-2003, 10:00 PM	#14 (permalink)
BooRadley Insane Location: Kentucky	Put out or get out. Cheat on her with her good friends. Whatever. I've seen this happen too many times. NEXT!!! Think about it. A blowjob takes < 10 minutes. You probably eat her out for half an hour or more at a time. Who exactly is placing unfair demands on this relationship? Heres a hint. It's not you.

12-15-2003, 08:22 AM	#15 (permalink)
james t kirk Junkie Location: Toronto	There are three kinds of women out there when it comes to oral sex. 1. Hates to do it, never does it, probably never will. 2. Will do it to please you, but doesn't really enjoy it, but doesn't dislike it enough not to do it. 3. Loves it. Loves cock, loves sucking cock. I have met all three types. Obviously, No. 3 is the best way to go and believe me, there are lots of them out there. No. 2's are the ones you have to watch out for because the odds of her becoming a No. 3 are slim to none, while the odds of her becoming a No. 1 with time are much more great. You are probably with a No. 1, or a latent No. 2 at best (I say this because you are young and she probably hasn't come into her cock smoking years yet, but she will never be a No. 3.) I truly believe that a woman being a No. 3 is something they are born with. Yours wasn't. The question is, "when they were handing out the cock love skills, was your girl holding the door?" My advice,,,, Take it for what its worth, you're so young, it won't matter in the grand scheme of your life. But in the future, here's a tip for you........ If you are with a woman, and at some point, either when you are talking sex on the phone, or when she's a little drunk, or you are getting to know each other in a carnal fashion, if she SAYS, that is she herself says, "I love sucking cock" (and this has happened to me on a few occasions) BINGO, you have a No. 3. You have arrived at the promised land my son and this too was good.

12-15-2003, 03:50 PM	#18 (permalink)
water_boy1999 Fly em straight! Location: Above and Beyond	Both of you are still quite young. You are just now beginning to realize what a wonderful world of sex we have out there for the taking. Be patient with her. I remember being young once...er....eh hem....I mean, I remember those pre-sex days when each and every new experience took some warming up to. Getting my first blow job, eating my first beaver, getting my nuts....oh, you get the point. She is still in that mode where she is warming up to the idea of giving her first blow job. Be patient, she will come around. (pun not intended) __________________ Doh!!!! -Homer Simpson

12-15-2003, 06:35 PM	#20 (permalink)
Cheesebreath Upright Location: U.S.A.	Another female point of view; maybe she just doesn't know what to do and is worried about looking like a fool. You should open the lines of communication. Even if you don't stay with this girl, it's never too early to start talking about things like this to get more comfortable with it. Good luck. __________________ It's better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved before.