What should I talk about?
 

I'm a senior in high school, and I've seen this one girl who's a junior every now and then in the hall ways. I've never talked to her before, however. The other day, she slipped a note into my locker, and in it she said she thinks I'm cool and wants to hang out or whatever. She gave me her number, so that night I called her and told her I would be away all weekend, but I could talk next week in school.

What I want to know is what should I talk about? I've never had a conversation with her before, so what should I start off discussing?

Music, her interests, your interests. 21 questions is a game I played in highschool, the girls seemed to like it and I got to know them better.

Yeah... The one thing that you want to do is to let her know that you're interested in HER and not just what you can get from her. Ask her questions. That's your best bet.

before what questions you ask her. I have a coworker that will not do a thing with you if you ask what kind of music she listens too. She feels that if you have to ask that question you are not being sincere in learning about her.


She is gorgues but it is a weird quark she has

Tell her your dreams, you ambitions, and your views on anything and everything. give her a chance to get to know you and feel comfortable around you by giving her a glimpse of what makes you, well.... you.
Hang out with her outside of both your usual elements by going to a cafe (yeh yeh, how cliche) or going on a walk somewhere that both feel comfortable and safe so that you two get to know one another for who you are really, not how you act in a familiar environment. tell her about what intersts you (note: porn, video games, wresteling, and sports are not acceptable. those are cliche and you have more substance than that) so that she can see you for all that you have to offer her emotionaly and intelligently.
My other peice of advice: if your nervous, then don't hide it. it's endering and honest to be nervous around someone your interested in and if your both nervous, that's not akward but instead natural and more than slightly charming.

NO NO NO NO NO (as from the movie sexy beast) Why do people think that when they first meet they should tell each other there life stories, its very boring. Instead, just talk about something happening around the school, in the news, modern cultural or a mutual intrest but don't just throw out question after question. Its a date, not an inquiry from the spanich inquisition.

crack a cheesy joke, just to let her know how socially apt you are :P

But seriously, if theres chemistry, you shouldnt need to worry about that. You either talk or you dont, and sometimes either can be a good of bad thing. When my g/f and I met, we didnt say much at all - we didnt need to.

Be yourself... let it come on its own

I don't think you have to worry. If she already digs you then you'd have to go out of your way to screw something up. So don't fuck it up! ;)

I can always strike up a conversation talking about music. I have tried the TV thing before, but it usually comes across that I am hopelessly addicted to that blasted tube, and scares them away. :-P

Ok first off you gotta try and ask her some questions that will make her talk, a lot. Then you have to really listen to her- make a nice conscious effort, and also, make "me too" statements (not me too word for word) whenever you find similarities. It helps to be able to finish her sentences or extend her descriptions, and sometimes feed back to her what she says (trance words).

Ultimately she is interested in you, and she wants to be with you based on what she knows so far-- and remember that she approached you. Don't think too much about it and don't go all out of your way to find out just exactly how to get with this girl. If you overthink things you might end up fucking it all up, so don't do that.

Make sure you're in a good mood when you meet her! Shower, dress nicely, don't put on a lot of cologne or shit that's not necessary, just be a more vibrant version of what you were when she passed by you in the halls.

Most importantly, have some fun with her.

Best of luck.

Absolutely ... asking questions is a great way to go. Ask open-ended questions (rather than yes/no) so you can take the discussion in a lot of different directions. Don't worry about it ... just have fun.

Just ask her about herself... all us girls like to talk about ourselves hehehehehheeh.

Talk? If she already digs you why ruin it by talking. ;)

just go up to her and say hey baby, wanna fuck?

but seriously, get her to talk, you listen.

She says she wants to hang out, good--ask her to go out and do something. Go to dinner, or better, get creative. Just calling up and talking wont really lead to too much. Also, by working some other activity in, there wont be such a burden to keep the conversation flowing.

dude, she took the first 4 steps already.. contacting you, leaving a note, and her number, and saying you're cool and she wants to hang out with you... you're golden!

just be yourself. if she already likes you, it's because it's the YOU she sees every day. just be YOU. giving of yourself makes a girl feel important, so talk about things you like. ask her what she does for fun. And, should you ultimately succeed, fuck her like a rabid monkey in heat. It's all about repeat business, and word-of-mouth advertising. YES, girls talk to other girls about how good you are- or how BAD.

Good luck!!

Dude no need to worry you are so in it isnt even funny. Just remember to spend more time listening to her than talking about yourself. The key is listening dont pretend to listen, actually listen to what she has to say and show that you are doing it by asking her questions.

when I first met my girlfriend, she was saying something but I couldn't understand her cause her words were muffled by my dick in her mouth. Maybe you should try that (j/k!).

Seriously though, when you're with someone you like, you will find yourself talking about anything and everything. Don't worry about what to say when you're with her, it'll only make you more nervous.

Can I ask her why she thinks I'm cool from seeing me in the halls or should I not even bring it up?

Oh god dont even mention that! Just thank your lucky stars that she sees you in that way!

By cool im sure she means good looking. Dont put her on the spot.

you must have just gotten boobs like bebe on south park
that made her really cool and smart too

find someone to buy you some mike's hard lemonade or something, feed her a couple of them and it won't matter what you talk about,
you managed to get booze, so that will ensure you stay cool in high school ranks

if you need help with that let me know, just make sure she invites a bunch of friends that will get drunk and strip after 3 mike's that i can watch

you stay cool, probably hookup with this broad, and nothings better that drunk hs girls...
its a win-win situation

if not, then talk about teachers and whatever else hs'ers talk about these days,

Lol, as I said in my other thread, why does it always come back to getting her into bed? I don't know, I just find it funny that every reply ends up talking about what I should do to screw her.

Anyways, thanks for the help. I talked to her today, but at some points it was rather awkward because we didn't really know what to bring up.

I saw a movie with her on Friday, and overall it was fun, but on several occasions we didn't really have anything to talk about. The same thing happens after school; we have about an hour after school to talk, but it's awkward because I'm not sure what to bring up. Also, what else could I ask her to do on the weekend besides going to dinner or seeing a movie? I'd feel rude or imposing if I asked if we could hang out at her house, although I'd love to since it's worth easily a million dollars.

Oh and by the way before the movie we ate ice cream, which I paid for. However, I may be thinking too much about this, but she kept saying afterward before the movie how she was really cold. She I have done something about this or?

Glad to hear you went out and gave it a shot on your own instead of listening to all of us.;)
Some women like the chivalry of you offering them your jacket when their cold. Or perhaps she WAS cold. No real way to tell, though i always take a jacket with me when i go to the movies with my fiance since she'll always say she won't get cold and then complain when we get there.
Just keep going with it. Sure it's awkward but thats just part of getting to know someone. It's part of being scared of making an ass of yourself and at the same time deperatly wanting to talk to her. It'll drive a sane man crazy, but that's what women are for.:p
I hope things turn out well!

Thanks for the response. I didn't have a jacket since it was fairly warm outside, so I wasn't sure if I should put my arm around her or what.

You gotta start working on your reading of body signals. If she's saying she's cold while leaning her shoulder into yours, clearly that's what you should do. If she's keeping her distance, that's a signal as well.

You'll get the hang of it as you go along. :)

Yeah, she wasn't leaning her shoulder into mine, because then I'd feel bad that I didn't do anything about it.

This may be moot, but when we were eating ice cream, when she was almost done, she asked if I wanted to taste her ice cream cone. I said no, but am I over thinking this?

Of course you are. And your not overthinking this half as much as she probably is.:p
And only you can decide if you want a peice of her "ice cream cone";) Though it's sounds like a cute thing for her to say.
Just take it one day at a time.

Here's an overall tip (my girlfriend indirectly told me this...)

Don't over-analyze things. She's the type to analyze things to death (for example, with some of her friends, she analyzed a porn mag), however she told me that when we first went out, she decided not to overanalyze it to death, and to just go with the flow.

That's what you need to do, buddy. Go with the flow... Keep us informed :)

I really miss high school. Dating was so easy back then. You told a girl you liked her and then you were together.

All you need to do is relax. Trust me. If you're overthinking she is too. If you feel uncomfertble she does too. If you want to touch her... she wants you to touch her. Hold her hand. Runs your fingers across her arm while watching the movie. I'm not saying you should start fondling her in the theater... just be gentle and sweet. Tell her she smells good. And when talking to her on the phone tell her that you are picturing her standing in front of you. Don't mention sex in normal conversation and by all means hide the hard on you get when you finally get to kiss her. There is nothing more embarassing then a unwanted hard on. Be a gentlemen... open doors. Pay for EVERYTHING. Compliment her shoes. Never ever tell a girl she has pretty eyes. They hear it all the time. Pick new and interesting thing to compliment. Like her walk or the way she drives.

It's all easy... at least it was for me.

Since you guys know how I met this girl and what I've done so far after the first eleven days of knowing her, I have a different question. Do you guys think it'd be alright to kiss her yet, and if so would it be rude to french kiss her without discussing it before hand. Also, would it be better if I indirectly mentioned it asking for example, "have you ever kissed a guy before?"?

exactly... dump your life story and youll seem needy. never plan beyond "Hello" or youll trip yourself up. find out what her plans for the weekend are or what her class schedule is or whatever. the "life story" stuff is best saved for late night talks etc...




as far as kissing, your a senior, shes a junior. its not 7th grade. I'm sure you could probably get a kiss in. if you wait too long you might make her think you dont *want* to kiss her

I know, I get the feeling that she does want me to touch her (holding her hand, etc.), but I would feel bad if I did something she wasn't ready for or didn't want.

Also, could I ask her about it, or should I just do it? The last thing I want is to not do anything when she really wants me to.

well dont just spring it on her. move in slow and watch her face, mainly her eyes. unless your more comfortable asking. I used to have a big problem with making any kind of move and still do at times. do whatever you feel most comfortable doing. if she didnt like you she would spend time with you so if you ARE moving too quickly the worst respose will probably just be her telling you to take it a little slower.

hope this helps. keep us posted :)

It's going to seem more akward for you than it will for her at first. I've been totally comfortable and content with guys that i've dated the first couple of times while they've been freaking out and worried.
I have one word of encouragement for you: if she is comfortable just being with you and not always finding something to discuss, you've found a winner.

Good luck!