Condoms. I loathe thee.
 

Ok so I don't claim to be a condom connoisseur. I have used maybe 3 ever (lucky me?)

I've been fortunate enough to be in long term relationships with few women who were clean and on birth control and it made for me making it to 31 years old without any kids or STD's so....

Now that I'm single again, I've had a few run ins with having to use these infernally awful things.

The 1st one I used like 6 years ago was probably the only one that was tolerable, but was supplied by the woman.

now? I went and got some from a friend who had some spare.

These things have some absolutely cheesy and awful names/gimmicks, seriously? ruff ryder? sounds so goddamned immature. *roll eyes*

so the fucking things have like these little o-rings right? well things are getting hot and heavy and I finally bust it out, roll it on with a little bit more effort than I thought I'd need (i'm not exactly abnormally hung or anything as far as I know) and it gets down to the base and pretty much cuts off circulation which leaves me with a bag of limp dick meat in a bag that I can't do anything with.

So um, how does one shop for a proper fit exactly?

Condomania Online | TheyFit Sized-to-Fit Condoms

There are other sites as well, but this is a good place to start.

I always bought the large size, which fit great, except on pullout, so be careful. And they were fun to buy, I always slapped them boldly on the counter with the "large" print up.

Have the girl put it on you. There are several sexy methods she can employ to put it on you and keep maintain your attention.

Whenever I'm rolling on one, I like to sing: "AIDS. I loathe thee." It also goes well with: "Screaming poo-factory. I loathe thee."

But, yeah... condoms suck. Until you get into a major long term relationship, they're the first and only line of defense you can trust.

...

Condomania is a good source for condoms that "fit." Trying different brands also helps.

If you're in college, odds are they've got them for free in giant bins at the health center.

If you're not in college and live by one, I'd recommend pretending to be on the 6 year plan.

Condoms are expensive.

The local coffee shop has them for free in a basket in the john.

Thanks hippies!

Our boy Daniel is a High Level Condom Blacksmith, so Anonymous Poster, I'd wait for his response.

I hate condoms, too. The only thing a former brother-in-law ever said that I still agree with is that it's like showering with a raincoat on. Better safe than sorry, though. I think it's very funny you posted this as Anonymous Member.

People love complaining about condoms. They're too loose or too tight or they break too easily or they make sex suck or whatever. Based on my not so limited experience, I can say these are all avoidable problems. There's always going to be a loss of some sensation, of course, but it's relatively negligible all things considered. Grab some Durex extra sensitives, my favorites, in the correct size and try not to get caught up in it.

Anyway, they're better than an unwanted pregnancy.

I think that condoms are fun to put on.:)
Well, I've never noticed that.:;):

Or an unwanted STD.

Lindy

Remember, they're ribbed for your pleasure, not ours. Guys generally have less sensation when wrapped up. It's a sacrifice we make for safety and security. Still, condom technology is improving. The Durexes I mentioned are a good example of the meeting of thin and strong.

Spawn are STDs, you just have to feed them til they are 18.

As opposed to the ones you do want? :confused:

ya, just something to get used to. if you like having more than one partner you should use them, if you're strictly monogamous and not worried about possible progeny, go for it.

As Mr Nine says, I have some knowledge in this area.

They Fit are pretty good (I've been to their factory), but in truth they offer a service that you can get in other ways for less money.

Condoms are measured in Nominal Width - this is the measurement that you get when you lie the condom over the edge of a rule. This is half the circumference of the circle of the condom - therefore, if you put a ribbon round your penis and measure it, the best nominal width for you will be a little LESS than half of the circumference. I say less because you need some tension in the material to stop it coming off inside your partner.

In WHO rules, standard condoms are 52mm wide; Asian standards are 49mm, and the largest condoms are 60mm.

Shape plays a huge part too - condoms with a flared tip (i.e. a bulbous section from the head back to half way down the shaft) give a feeling of freedom around the head, and remove the restrictive problems that you have described.

In terms of "why bother with a condom", there are all sorts of condoms that offer part of the sexual experience that a plain old penis doesn't.

Many people love flavoured condoms - they allow mouth-related sexings that nobody can complain about taste or hygeine. Textured condoms allow ribs, studs, dots, and any combination of these. There are condoms with stimulating gels, condoms with cooling gels, condoms with warming lube, we even do condoms with mild anaesthetic gel so you can party all night.

Condoms are great for anal sex - you can bag it and do your duty, then re-bag it and play elsewhere with no fear of infecting the vagina with faecal bacteria.

If you are worried about sensation, there are sensitive latex condoms (0.050 mm thick, compared to normal 0.080 mm), there are Polyurethane ones (0.025 mm) and even Polyethylene ones (0.015 mm). If you are worried about breakage there are thicker ones (0.100mm).

All in all, there are more styles than you can imagine.

And if you don't like them, I also know about HIV testing and Pregnancy Testing. :D

Grow up? Deal with it... condoms are fine.

There is a "twist" one which isn't too bad. I forget the company, but actually adds an unusual feeling. Also the vibrating rings in addition to the condoms are pretty good.