boob problem
 

ok, my wife has small boobs and she wears dress shirts most of the time being that we work in an office, when she bends over her boobs hang out and you have a clear view of her boobs and braw. She doesnt seem to care and when i tell her it bothers me she just gives me the cold shoulder or gets mad, we have been shopping for stuff to solve the problem but seems like she just gives up. what do i do?.....besides a boob job, lol

Why rule out breast augmentation? Is she opposed to it or you?

Perhaps she is comfortable with her body and her cold treatment or anger with you is due to the fact that she feels you are not. And larger breasts or smaller breasts it would seem are not going to make a difference in what is visible when she bends over.

Turtlenecks and sweaters usually have high necklines. You could also recommend bending at the knees.

Tell her to wear a camisole over her bra. You'll find nice ones in the lingerie department of your local Macy's. They also sell them at Costco.

Oh, please don't ask her to stick ugly ass IV bags in her chest, bro. Express your concerns regarding her choice of clothing. If modesty is your thing and not hers, you have a couple of options as well.

Tell her to wear shirts that fit. Dress shirts shouldn't show your "boobs and braw" if they're sized and worn properly. Besides, even if they are, as long as she's wearing something under the shirt, what's the issue? I could see if she was going commando, but if not...so? Do you let her wear a bathing suit?

Do they come in 50 packs?

Ya know, my exwife had the smallest boobs allowed by human evolution... and I never once saw her mosquito bites hanging out or her bra exposed unless I was snapping it, etc... and she used to wear some pretty skimpy hippie clothes a lot of the time. Please define these concepts for us.

Sounds like she's wearing the wrong dress shirts. Go for button-up collared dress shirts, buttoned nearly to the top. Can't go wrong.

Or take her to the supply closet after she does that. She'll either stop bending over or start doing it a lot more. Either way, you win....

Er.. so your problem is that you can see her boobs. And her Braw (awesome word, btw). Get her some shirts that fit, if she wants them to stop hanging out.

"Braw, braw!" quoth the raven, "Nevermore!"

...

Heh. Sorry.

Thanks for that laugh!! It's a three letter word and to see it misspelled with a "W" ....well, I'm still amazed and chuckling.

Yeah, Crompsie. This was brilliant. :lol:

Angry Christian Demands Modesty

I laugh every time I read this, Will.

You didn't mention where you two happen to work?! ;)

Anyway...thumbs down on the (as Crompsin referenced) IV bags... totally not necessary. Seems like the higher neckline and maybe the camisole (although I've never noticed this section at Costoc!) options already mentioned should do the trick. Although if my ex-w would have shared a little more frequently then perhaps she wouldn't be my ex-w! Enjoy the views when you get them ... that may be as good as it gets.

I think I may work with the guy that wrote. No... Just someone like the writer I suppose.

I believe the problem has been misdiagnosed.
Obviously your wife has a different conception of modesty and/or its requirement. She doesn't mind showing her little ones while you, my friend, are troubled by her exhibitionism. This is the meat of the matter and this is where your discussion with her needs to be directed.
Don't you think if she were really concerned with her breast showing she could come up with a solution? This is not rocket science.

If you had boobs, you'd probably want to show them off.

If she is small and wears a tight bra What is seen?, better yet where is your office, I'll have to form my own opinion and let you know

I do and I don't.

To the OP however, if I understand your problem correctly, your wife has small breasts (as do half the women out there) and from time to time, she may have occasion to bend over which allows you and presumably others to see her breasts which, however, are contained in a bra.

Or am I missing something here?

I don't understand your problem?

Is it that she's showing off her bra'd titties inadvertantly or on purpose?

Or is it that she's showing them off inadvertantly or on purpose and you are ashamed because they aren't big enough in your opinion?

Either way, you need help my man. The problem is most definitely YOURS and not hers.

Shopping for clothes for her are we? Would you think that this would be appropriate?

http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c5...fghanistan.jpg

If her entire boob is showing, sounds like she's wearing the wrong bra size. She might be smaller than what she thinks she is... which could be a problem with trying to tell her...

Easy...

Hey darling - some random guys and a couple of swingers and a bisexual woman I talk to on the internet have told me that you need to get measured for a new bra...

How could she be cross at that?

heh I hardly think it's his problem, thats a pretty closed minded way to look at things in my opinion.

It's about compromise remember? Not the women gets to do what she wants and the guy better deal with it.

I'm sure there is a compromise in her dress style that can be reached somewhere, unless she is a bitch who actually believes that its "your fault"

They're in the aisle with socks, underwear, and pajamas, usually along the perimeter of the clothing section. And no, will, they do not come in a 50-pack. Only a 3-pack. But they're $10.95 for 3--a pretty good deal. I got some with lacy edging I wear in the summer as a dressy top--plus, in the winter, they make great undershirts, like I said. And they have a built-in bra, which definitely holds the girls in and keeps the nips from showing.

http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c5...fghanistan.jpg
Hey wait! I've seen her! Well, actually they all DO look the same. *grumble*

As for Menoman's comment, I think I disagree. Compromise is, by and large, overrated. In a relationship, I believe that either both people need nearly identical values, or they both need to agree to disagree. Changing ones self for the benefit of another rarely leads to anything healthy. I also think it really sounds like his problem. Perhaps he can elaborate more, but as it stands, it sounds like his SO is comfortable with herself, and he is uncomfortable with her level of comfort. To the OP... dude... you have a woman that IS comfortable with herself. Don't fuck that up. So many females these days have self-image or self-esteem problems due to societal and media pushiness. If she is happy with herself, you should feel extra, EXTRA lucky! Seriously!

I find it funny that men think that they have some sort of right to tell their women how they should dress. Sorry, that's way too controlling.

It doesn't sound to me like she's dressing like a slob, just if she bends over, you can catch a peek of a bra'd titty. Sorry, but that's pretty much most female atire. It's not like she's bending over 100 times a day and there just so happens to be a guy in the right place at the right time at the right angle, thinking the right thing.

Your statement, "unless she is a bitch who actually believes that its [sic] your fault" is quite telling about your attitude towards women. Misogynistic is the first word that comes to mind. Insecure would be the second.

This is the OP's one and only post... Anyone else suspect he's slain his wife in a fit of boob-inspired jealousy and done a runner?

I was thinking the opposite. She's slain him after he suggested a boob job. Or at the very least left him incapable of using his hands.

Mayhaps they are hitting all the after Thanksgiving sales looking for better fitting bras and shirts.

Nice try, but I never said he can tell her what to wear, I said he can find a compromise with her about it, maybe she can wear the same clothing, but with a tight undershirt?

But you go with your attitude, I'm sure there are plenty of women who will enjoy walking all over you. Pussy would be the first word that comes to mind.

I find it funny when people start a post "I find it funny". And yes, that includes this post.

Almost as cool as how Jesus starts his parables in the Good Book.

Do you really think that's appropriate? I'll go ahead and save you the step- no, it's not. How about sticking to the subject and not going after the other members?

Get some short shorts and let your junk hang out.
What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

This is an example of the following equation:

Gender Equality = All Bad!

I can't get a clear idea of what the problem actually is.

If she had a boob job she would fall out of her bra...less?

Is it that he is embarrassed because her boobs are small?

I don't get it.

Maybe you should relax and stop trying to control your wife.

From....The Wife
 

OKAY!
This is the deal. I am a size 34B, sometimes a 36B depending upon the brand. I am also 5'7" and about 130lbs....to help illustrate my 'frame'...I am tall with smaller breasts...meaning, buying bras is a major headache because one that fits in the 'cup' does NOT fit comfortably around my rib cage. I have compromised with him to buy smaller bras (which are pretty uncomfortable) to ensure my nips don't ever show. The only ones I could find are pointy and i hate them...but I do agree with him in the fact it's not so cool to have my nips showing.

For those of you who said I need to buy clothes that fit or are not so slutty or however it was put...you have NO CLUE! (I meant that nicely...it's just comical to me) I am pretty tom-boyish. I love working in the garage with the boys yadda yadda. I have NEVER owned a skirt shorter than my knees--except for one for the house for Diz--and only wear skirts/dresses when I must! I don't where things that are 'bearing'...I just where normal things. We work at the MO National Guard so casual dress is required. I wear polos, v necks, those kinds of things.

I have worn undershirts that have an elastic band around the top and quite frankly I am sick of wearing them, for one they are uncomfortable and for two, that's an extra layer of clothing and it's HOT! I have a tank top undershirt that is a bit looser and comfortable that I got at Target, and he complains of it because the neck is loose, hence where you can see my bra if I bend over.

Another reason I may find his requests so annoying is I am generally and optimistic person and think good of everyone. My best friends are 5 guys and one girl...they are all basically my bros as I have lived with them all at one time or another...maybe part of the reason why this issue is more annoying to me that Diz makes such a stink of it...I don't know.

Basically what it boils down to is I am 21, have small boobs...am ok with that, but would not be mad if they magically grew over night...haha and I refuse to be uncomfortable. I do want to resolve this issue, but I'm such an odd 'shape/size' it makes everything so damn difficult. I, personally, don't see what the big deal is if my bra shows...to me it's just material...and I think he should be lucky I'm not one of those 'high' fashion girls b/c I have seen those girls that wear a shirt and then a lacy bra underneath that sticks out above their shirt...I would never DREAM of wearing something like that! hehe

So, all, your comments have been greatly appreciated. Hope this LONG description fully explains the situation and maybe answers some questions...please keep your comments coming...

Oh and one last thing, Diz and I have an 18month old together...and I go to college and work full time...We are pretty tired a lot..I'm at a very young age to have a plate so full...I enjoy being able to feel feminine since many of my hobbies are...not. I know Diz does not mean it this way at all, but this whole issue makes me kind of feel like he is trying to take away my 'feminity?' by making me feel like he is trying to 'cover me up'....does that make any sense?

Thanks All!

well sh** "from Diz"
 

ok well looks like the wifey poo got ahold of the laptop.......:) let me go into more detail so i do not look like a controlling asshole. The reason behind my post was to figure out some answers. I dont try to controll or make her wear clothes that are uncomfortable I just want to resolve the issue at hand so we can move on.......she doesnt even have to bend fully over just the slytest degree of bending and bam! not a little peice of bood or braw im talking the whole thing you can see both cups or boobs whatever and sometimes stomach I know its hard to cover up all of it you might see a strap or two but both boobs clear shot in about 95% of what she owns is a little ridiculous..if I wanted this to go on I would have married a stripper, you know what I mean those are my boobs they are secrade to me....well used to be :). So im not a control freak just dont want them shown to every soldier in the guard :) and to be honest sometimes I feel disrespected by her stuff hanging out. Well like she said keep them comments rolling thx! Diz

Ah! Thanks for the clarification. I am a 34B myself and never have thought of my boobs as being 'small.' So that's all relative, I think.

As for bending over and being able to see your bra. This I understand completely. When I bend over, unless I am wearing a shirt that is very tight, people can see my bra. In fact, if you stop to notice it, a lot of bras are seen in this way. And I don't think it's a big deal and not worth going out of your way to prevent. I think your husband is just being very protective (and very conscious of it) and most other people probably aren't thinking twice about it.

Just my two cents. :)

To The Jazz and All
 

I apologize sincerely, it didn't even cross our minds...I now have my own account!

Thanks all!
Taylor

OKAY!
This is the deal. I am a size 34B, sometimes a 36B depending upon the brand. I am also 5'7" and about 130lbs....to help illustrate my 'frame'...I am tall with smaller breasts...meaning, buying bras is a major headache because one that fits in the 'cup' does NOT fit comfortably around my rib cage. I have compromised with him to buy smaller bras (which are pretty uncomfortable) to ensure my nips don't ever show. The only ones I could find are pointy and i hate them...but I do agree with him in the fact it's not so cool to have my nips showing.

For those of you who said I need to buy clothes that fit or are not so slutty or however it was put...you have NO CLUE! (I meant that nicely...it's just comical to me) I am pretty tom-boyish. I love working in the garage with the boys yadda yadda. I have NEVER owned a skirt shorter than my knees--except for one for the house for Diz--and only wear skirts/dresses when I must! I don't where things that are 'bearing'...I just where normal things. We work at the MO National Guard so casual dress is required. I wear polos, v necks, those kinds of things.

I have worn undershirts that have an elastic band around the top and quite frankly I am sick of wearing them, for one they are uncomfortable and for two, that's an extra layer of clothing and it's HOT! I have a tank top undershirt that is a bit looser and comfortable that I got at Target, and he complains of it because the neck is loose, hence where you can see my bra if I bend over.

Another reason I may find his requests so annoying is I am generally and optimistic person and think good of everyone. My best friends are 5 guys and one girl...they are all basically my bros as I have lived with them all at one time or another...maybe part of the reason why this issue is more annoying to me that Diz makes such a stink of it...I don't know.

Basically what it boils down to is I am 21, have small boobs...am ok with that, but would not be mad if they magically grew over night...haha and I refuse to be uncomfortable. I do want to resolve this issue, but I'm such an odd 'shape/size' it makes everything so damn difficult. I, personally, don't see what the big deal is if my bra shows...to me it's just material...and I think he should be lucky I'm not one of those 'high' fashion girls b/c I have seen those girls that wear a shirt and then a lacy bra underneath that sticks out above their shirt...I would never DREAM of wearing something like that! hehe

So, all, your comments have been greatly appreciated. Hope this LONG description fully explains the situation and maybe answers some questions...please keep your comments coming...

Oh and one last thing, Diz and I have an 18month old together...and I go to college and work full time...We are pretty tired a lot..I'm at a very young age to have a plate so full...I enjoy being able to feel feminine since many of my hobbies are...not. I know Diz does not mean it this way at all, but this whole issue makes me kind of feel like he is trying to take away my 'feminity?' by making me feel like he is trying to 'cover me up'....does that make any sense?

Thanks All!

Thank you for your response! It is not my goal to upset him or make our lives difficult...which it has tremendously! I don't know if it's just me or what, but when I read your post, I felt relief! I honestly feel like there is no normal shirt (other than a turtleneck/sweater/tshirt) that is not going to gape and show my bra! I don't want him to feel like I don't care but not only do I feel like it is impossible, I'm so stressed out and sick of talking about it (and so is he) that now it's like AAAHHHH!! We went shopping in a mall two weekends ago and was near tears b/c everything I picked out he looked at it like...boob shirt (meaning will show off boobs) ... I wasn't picking out skanky stuff...that's just how it is these days I guess. It is super frustrating and we are BOTH ready to find a solution and get on with it! :)

Im just your average girl... :) and me, personally view myself as a pretty conservative girl...who just grew up around too many men! LOL ugh!

I am concerned about the root of this problem. What is bad about "boob shirts" anyways? My wife has the same size breasts and I love it when she is revealing. I look out for too much exposure (nipples, potential accidents) but I know that anything she shows is FOR ME. She always shows me what she's wearing because she wants to see that big dumb grin on my face. If other guys get a glimpse, its too bad because its mine. Apart from any catastrophic exposure (which has yet to happen) we are OK with anything.

I suggest you two get more comfortable with each other and develop a dynamic that allows for more expressive freedom.

This doesn't help, but... every time I see the title of this thread, I think that it's an oxymoron, like "jumbo shrimp" or "military intelligence".

The first words out of my mouth, after I initially shrieked the word "boobies!" in boyish celebration in my head, was "boob.... problem?"

So she accidentally flashes her breasts at times. The next time you see them, or think you catch someone seeing them, just say to yourself, "that's right... those are all mine, buddy." Others can think about whatever they want, but you're the only one who can actually take hold of those lovely boobages and go to town.

If you're going to stand on the sense of ownership (which I identify with and don't believe is misogynistic), then TAKE that sense of ownership. Those are YOURS. Only YOU get to have them. Some lucky duck might get a sneak peak, but only YOU can prevent forest fires- I mean touch them.

Yes it's intimate, and yes it's your wife, and yes yes yes everything else. But. It's not like she's parading around like a whore wearing electrical tape over her nips and a thong to work. She can't find clothes that keep the girls under wraps, and covering up more is downright uncomfortable for her. It may be psychologically uncomfortable for you to know she may flash here and there, but physically uncomfortable for her is something you should really put more care into, as the husband.

So... your mental discomfort, which is something you can likely work on, or her physical discomfort, which she can't do a thing about? Those are your options. You seem like a good guy. Choose the right one.

I don't think I am getting the full picture here... maybe if you posted pictures of your problem I might be able to understand more fully. :lol:

I kid, I kid.

I can appreciate your frustration but in my experience, a flash of a bra is relatively common and nothing to be especially upset about. I also understand that some women simply have problems finding bras that fit them. Maybe some of the women on board can suggest a place to go where you will find more options.

My thoughts exactly.

Most women I know would be very very upset if their SO was dictating how they should dress for reasons of his morality.