abaya

Experience has nothing to do with being willing to learn, even from books/internet sources. TFP is a good source, but try to expand your knowledge of the female body (and your own body) by doing some research before your next real-life experience. Wiki is a good place to start. Look up "hymen" while you're at it.

I can guarantee you that the more educated you are about the real ways that yours and a woman's body works (no, watching porn doesn't count!), the less misinformed you are going to be with the next girl. Which will certainly lead to a better experience overall, I would hope.

__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

match000

Actually, she had asked me "Wait, are you sure u are a virgin, how come you know what to do and seem pretty good."

And i was like "uhh porn duh. every man's education"

ahahah

longbough

While you can get some ideas from porn if you're not experienced, you'll discover there's a lot more to learn that can't be found in porn. I'd also caution you that porn has at least as much disinformation (to take an extreme example e.g. not all women like to be choked or frantically fucked. Also it's surprising how many porn men do a crappy job at cunnilingus) - so be careful. I'm not trying to be critical - I'm just giving advice, here. When you know more about how a woman's body works you'll have a tremendous advantage over 99% of the other guys out there - And an experienced woman would know and appreciate the difference.

The truth is that sexual technique is a lifelong study for the open-minded person. People (i.e. you AND your partner) get tired of a handfull of "signature moves."

Take care.

__________________
"I do believe that, where there is only a choice between cowardice and violence, I would advise violence. Thus when my eldest son asked me what he should have done, had he been present when I was almost fatally assaulted in 1908, whether he should have run away and seen me killed or whether he should have used his physical force which he could and wanted to use, and defended me, I told him that it was his duty to defend me even by using violence." - Mahatma Ghandi

Bajingo

Jesus that thread exploded pretty damn fast.

I thought I made it pretty clear, I don't need to learn about how a cunt is supposed to act, I don't need to be taught that a baby comes out of that hole.

I'm not naive enough to think it ain't gonna stretch. The thing is, it's gonna hurt and its gonna fucking hurt bad, I already know this, when 2 fingers is causing pain, a hard cock is going to make her fucking cry.

my 2 fingers put together is pretty much 1 inch across, not even half an inch the opposite direction.


I wasn't even really sure what I was asking for advice on, maybe, previous experience someone has had with this scenario? Maybe some tips, or something I donno...

also I'm not being pushy, and I told you what is the problem, calling it all these other problems isn't really doing anything.

I know my girl, if she wasn't confortable with what we were doing, she wouldn't be doing it, I've had PLENTY of conversations with her about this and I know she understands, if she isn't into something, then it stops right then.

She could be involuntarily clenching but time and time again she says she isn't clenched, and that she feels very relaxed.


and furthermore... that statement made me laugh really hard.

ngdawg

Saying she's relaxed and being so are two different things...
First, is she dripping wet or dry? Inbetween or maybe dries out quickly?
Physically, she's not a 'virgin', just in the ways of straight-on sex, so I'm sticking with involuntary anxiety.
The time, when it comes, has to have spontaneity and a flow to it, a result of something building at that time. One prior thought about the process and everything locks down.
We're telling you what transpires because, well....that's what happens. It's not attacking your knowledge or lack of.
Once you and she are truly into it and truly going for it, you have to go slow-'tease' by stroking her labia with your penis. Don't just try for a home run and jam it-ever so slowly enter; take a lot of time to do so to give her enough time and self-lube to accept you. Just the tip for a while, then a tiny bit more. Back off if she's hurting and hug, kiss, love her for a while and maybe try again. It could take all night, but it'll be worth it.

Would he like to? j/k....
I am an older woman and ain't nothing loose here except my upper arms

__________________
Don't blame me. I didn't vote for either of'em.

Bajingo

I do realize anxiety is a possibility, though it's not like we haven't done ANYthing sexual together, we have a pretty extensive background when it comes to making each other cum, sans intercourse.

If it is anxiety, as much as we've been together, even when penetration wasn't on the menu, she was still extremely tight, even after all this time, and we are very comfortable with each other. It's very honest between us on these issues.

It's not a problem getting one or even two fingers inside of her, She is the wettest girl i've ever been with, like... change the sheets wet, and its very easy for me to get her like that too.

I've heard before, that it's a good idea for a female to go to her gyno before/after her first intercourse, so I am going to throw that out there for her, it's a good idea anyway, and a friendly member PMed me a bit of info on what to ask to see if there is something physical causing something like this.

as much as we've been together, I can't imagine its "conscious" anxiety, or subconscious either really. We've been sexually active alot, sans intercourse, and we are both very comfortable with each other for awhile now even when penetration wasn't on the menu.

I've even brought up a point or two made here, and she agree's that consciously she is very comfortable and accepting to everything we've done up to this point, and even when she masturbates, 2 fingers is almost too much for her.

If when masturbating you aren't comfortable with what is going on, I don't know when you can be really.



Anyway, I've heard its a good idea for females to go to their gyno before/after their first intercourse, so I'm going to bring that up, she planned on going after, but maybe before is also a good idea, it really can't hurt, and a friendly member here PMed me a bit of info about what questions she should ask and what exactly to tell the doctor about when/where/how bad it hurts to see if there could be something physical that is causing the situation.

longbough

I repeat: vaginismus ... Google it.

__________________
"I do believe that, where there is only a choice between cowardice and violence, I would advise violence. Thus when my eldest son asked me what he should have done, had he been present when I was almost fatally assaulted in 1908, whether he should have run away and seen me killed or whether he should have used his physical force which he could and wanted to use, and defended me, I told him that it was his duty to defend me even by using violence." - Mahatma Ghandi

tenniels

I do believe if you thoroughly read the post there are many great ideas, suggestions, tips on what the problem could be, ways to work with the problem etc. You say "I told you what is the problem, calling it all these other problems isn't really doing anything". Well no, you told us what the symptoms of the problem are, and are looking to figure out what the problem is so you know what you can do to work around it, fix it, whatever. That is why you are getting all these responses "calling it all these other problems". Have her go to her doctor. Continue to work at foreplay and exploring each other. Make sure she starts exploring herself, I swear this will be a big help. If you think you've told us what the problem is and are not satisfied with our responses, it sounds like you've almost given up on the situation. Like, well this is the problem, this hurts and we can't do it. Well until you start trying things, you won't know. I don't know what else to say.

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Bajingo

I am happy to receive the posts about "other things"

What I meant was I already know this isn't a "normal" circumstance, I've been around enough and I'm not some 17 year old freshly seeing some vagina.

I didn't mean to be rude about it, I just meant that the people trying to tell me it is normal, babies come out so dont worry about it etc. It's just not the case.

Like I said, a doctor visit is in order and I'm gonna bring it up next time we have a discussion.