Nature vs. Nurture
 

Allright, my parenting class went over this one before, awhile ago. And today I was faced with a severely violent little boy, who couldn't be much older than 5 or 6. And it got me to thinking some more about it.

Is it nature or nurture that make us who we are? Do we learn everything? or is there something inside us at birth that determines who and how we will be?

This is kind of a big topic, so I thought I'd see what everyone else thinks.

According to my Child Development Psychology text book, 20-50% of our behaviour is shaped by genetic, while the rest is shaped by our environment and interactions.
I could quote some other stats for you, but what it boils down to is a combination, really. The genetics set out a "range of reaction" and our environment pins it down to who we are.

genetics AND/OR upbringing. Depending on the parents'/guardians' support, love, devotion, time, discipline, and actions that influence the child, that child will see that and copy it.

I firmly believe that most of our traits are in fact acquired from our surroundings, but genetics can make us predisposed to picking up certain traits moreso than others.

Long story short: I married my son's biological father when our son was 6. It was amazing to me how many traights he had that were similar to his father. I then knew biology has a lot to do with how we turn out.

On the other hand, I took on twin step-sons; one of which had spent much more time with his mother than the other. His actions prove to me that environment has a huge effect on how we turn out.

So, Untitled is right -- it is both.

(As for the child you mentioned above, I have found that all children desire and deserve boundaries. That boy is crying out for someone to say, "I love you enough" to put boundaries around you and help you succeed in life.")

It has to be both. Working with kids I see that. Kids pick up their parents patterns very early on. My daughter will say phrases or make gestures that are distictly hubby's or mine.

On the other hand here's a case for genetics - Hubby was adopted. His adoptive parents aren't really interested in car racing. His dad will watch the race with hubby but otherwise doesn't pay much attention to racing. Just over 5 years ago hubby and I met his birth mom for the first time. Come to find out she LOVES racing. They had the same favorite drivers even. Her brother loved the same drivers and even built an extra room onto his house to display all his racing collections he's such a fanatic. It's amazing to see the similarities in his birth mom and him after 21 years apart. He was adopted within a week of being born so spent all his growing up years with his adoptive family. He has many traits that you can see in his mom and dad too. He is a perfect example of nature and nurture both playing a part.

I can say it has to be either all the way nurture or "both." It can't be nature. Why?

I have a twin brother (who posts here too) and we act a lot different in real life. We think the same, but when it comes to personalities, we are completely different. It just depends on how you are raised and how you percept things.

I've been watching my son for about 15 months now, and I am amazed at how much he was 'formed' when he showed up. His personality is still clearly full of grey areas that are in the process of development, but there are also areas that are remakably defined and very resistant to change.

I guess that's a pretty strong vote for 'both'.

I think it's definately more nuture than nature. A childs upbringing and environment will definately shape his/her beliefs, attitudes and personality much more than genetics imo.

No kids here, but with 2 brothers the genetics idea appeals to me more.

I'm the oldest and the shyest, but also the best looking. I tend toward creative and artistic things. I don't have a head for math. I'm also the shortest.

My second brother is the most outgoing, but hes also basically equivalent to a mule in looks and brains. He tends toward getting high and fighting. Hes the tallest.

The third brother looks like me, and hes basically the happy medium between me and #2. Hes socially adept, and not too bad to look at. He also tends toward math and the like, something me and #2 both stink at. Brother number 3s only achilles heel is the fact that hes below average at reading and writing. He will be the second tallest.

We were all raised by mom and dad. But ones an introvert, ones a burnout, and one can't spell "dictionary" (It still fills me with remorse when I think about looking in the history and seeing "dictunary.com"). I'm exaggerating of course, but we are all completley different people raised under one roof.

Kid #1
When he encounters something new, he observes it, from a safe distance if possible. He thinks about it. He considers it from all angles.

Kid #2
When he encounters something new, he grabs it with both hands and shakes it, bashes it agains something, and puts anything that breaks off in his mouth.

Nature is huge.

Nature is more than most people think. It is very hard to see how much in children, because they are very complex little animals. If you look at kittens, there is so much nature built in. I have been raising a kitten from 2 days old. It has no other cats around to learn from, but it has the instinct to clean itself and use the litter. While nurture also plays a part, I think we come out of the box pretty well programmed. Like any program, it can be improved or screwed up.

As everyone else says, nature is huge. Subtle difference in brain chemistry can make a big difference even among close relatives, and those can be affected both by genetics and by the fetal environment. They can _also_ be affected by experiences in the world: I've read that the brain of an early-adolescent boy who is bullied a lot will develop differently than it might if he was in a safer situation, and those changes will affect his behavior just as much as the unpleasant memories.

So, it's nature and nuture and nature-as-modified-by-nuture.

My brother in law is 21. His mother believes in "nature rather than nurture" and he absolutely fucking hates that. Dunno if thats relevant or not but thought I'd mention it. I guess it was annoying for him growing up.

Asta!!

I would have to go with both. I am dyslexic I was born with that but becouse my parents pushed me and got me tuters and would not let me use it as a crutch I now have a masters dagree. So both have a place.

I think it's both. I think nature predisposes us to certain traits. But how they develop and what we do with them is all in the nuturing.