If You Could Have Sex With God Would You?
 

If You Could Have Sex With God Would You, and Why?


If God is Alanis Morissette, yes I would. Why not.

Not sure.. what if I got her pregnant? What if Im not as good as (ex's name here)?

Too much could go wrong, and besides, enough has happened in my life, Id be afraid it was a lure from god which, when I fall for it, would result in my penis falling off...

I think not. God and I havent had much love for each other for quite some time, its like a bad breakup...

Re: If You Could Have Sex With God Would You?
 

yeah i would. could be the best sex you ever have.

hell yes, i would.

I don't think I'd even have sex with Nietzsche if I had the chance.

to quote queer theologian robert goss, God is "about love making and justice doing."

So maybe we already are... If not yet, why not now?

god is in my pants

whoa, sex with the whole Universe? that sounds like a pretty fucking awesome trip!!!

I'd be worried about what sort of STDs I could pick up from him/her...

I don't think the Creator is a physical being, that said, I would totally do Aphrodite :-P

I would do her goddie style.

On one hand, if god plays a gorgous woman, you will probably have the best sex in your life.
On the other hand, if people find out about it, they may call out omnisexual.

-_-

heavenly.


j/k

Only if She swallows.

Well, if it turned out that God exists and is female, that would be one hell of a first time. Nobody else would be able to match that performance, though. Yeah, it's worth it. My kid could be the second coming of christ.

to pleasure God, or not to pleasure God....
doing so would be the biggest personal ambition ever, this is the Creator we talking about here....wow...Just gimme an angel is all i need...God? no thanks!

No thank you, God has already given the gift of being able to be in love and to love someone on this earth completely in galaxygirl. And to the end it, all I have ever wanted out of life to be loved the same way in return. I have already been blessed many times over, and I wouldn't want to be a glutton, to want any more, afterall that is a true sin.

Sex, making love, is truly spiritual and, imho, already involves God. (See quotation below.) To make "physical love" to God incarnate, no, not when God the spirit is already an intimate part of my love life.

Really though, what the fuck is this doing in philosophy?

Sexy mama hit it right on.

When you are making love to someone you are deeply and truly in love with, God is there.

Madonna's vagina is probably still bigger.

Since I assume you are speaking of what many religions view as the creator I would definately say YES. I figure - he/she began the concept of sex, gave us the ability to gain pleasure from it, why would he/she not know every tiny way of maximizing that pleasure. I think their prowess would probably be phenomenal - ;) Heavenly even.

what a weird thread lol

Hell yes I would too!

He/She/It is already fucking with me, why not? :)

Besides, the orgasms have to be out of this world!

As there is no God I'd say it's called masturbation...

"Oh God, Oh God Oh God OhgodohgofohGODOHGOD!!!!!"

"<James Earl Jones Reverb="+7">Verily! Sayeth mine name, bitch!"</James Earl Jones>

Sorry, that's all that question makes me think of right now. I'll go slink back to nonsense.

Supposing a god exists, I'm single, and I find "God" attractive. Yes.

You think God would be a control freak?

I do... I mean, what else can you do when you know everything...

Re: If You Could Have Sex With God Would You?
 

I dunno...you'd have to have that weird British guy for the pillow talk and orgasm or risk having your head explode...

That question just seems so horrible and wrong...

Oh you know I would. But I'd do it doggie style, stick it in the out hole, and try to convince God that it was an accident.

If I would have stumbled across this question while my addiction was still active, or before that with my self-loathing, and fear of an "angry god" (which led to my 'escape' via addiction), my answer would have been NO.
Now, today with my sobriety and knowledge of a loving god, (who knows my hopes, fears, stengths, weaknesses, character defects, etc), and the recent acknowledgement of the love thats always been there (but could'nt/would'nt accept), my answer is HELL YEAH:)
Besides whats better than a lover who 'knows' what trips your trigger' and communicates what brings joy and satisfaction to them;)

Ok, that almost made my choke on my mountain dew, hilarious. I have to think about it this way: I'm pretty good, but if I don't get god off she might just banish me to hell, and that would suck :P Now, if god was ordering me to come to bed, she might just banish me for NOT having sex with her, so at that point I might as well try and if I get sent to hell atleast I can brag to the demons about having nailed god :)

HAHA thats great

Yeah .. I mean come on. Realisticaly when most .. okay, so I can't say most. Not like I have ever watched anyone do the dirty deed cept in porns. Speaking for myself I find alot of times during sex I moan for God. "Ohhhh Gwad, yesss" . Maybe if one was to evaluate this act of chosen words during an orgasm as we do dreams. We may find it could be subconsciously a fantasy?

No I wouldn't have sex with God. I wouldn't feel right. But then again, Mary bore a child of Gods and was still a virgin. Hmmmm ?

I would, but I think that my girlfriend would get a bit pissed off.

i like your choice of words

EDIT: and i'd hit it. Twice even

Which God?
 

Although I'm sure any physical contact or (if you think sex is something divine) spiritual connection with the Christian God would be beyond any sex we can imagine I'd also enjoy sex with goddesses such as Kali and Athena or, for that matter, the Gnostic one. I've also always been very attracted to the Earth Mother's shapely curves (no mathematical pun intended at time of writing). Any REAL God would of course make these options to us. Make sure before you sell your soul to some Being or demiurge claming to be the One True God you get these perks in WRITING! I don't want prophets to tell me this is true, I want divine power to carve them into stone in front of me. Just to make sure. Please people before you cast your Divine Vote get very explicit contracts (Hm the Devil already does this, always the business man that Devil...) detailing what your good works or karma will get you. You can't go back and sue afterwards.

If any of you ladies want to have sex with a God just let me know. I can hook you up.

I don't know if I'd really want to fuck myself ^_^

i don't know... for some reason the whole thing creeps me out...

LMFAO

Sure, I'd try anything once.....

why the fuck not- I mean god knows all so if she did not want it to happen the option would never come up- plus, how could one top that .

you can't he doesn't exist, but I'd have sex with your mom

If God thought you sucked in the sack, she could make you better, right?
Imagine having sex on par with God.
Even better than human sex would be God sex... Imagine, the whole UNIVERSE would be shaking with thundering claps of Godly pleasure.

And who says a God wouldn't have sex with a human...
Take Hercules for example.

...And I'd totally do Aphrodite.

i dont see why not :)

Only if god was hitting on me. I think hitting on a unappreciative god could make the rest of eternity pretty bad.

that said that would definetly be the best sex ever wouldn't it?

Of course what if god was a guy(or whatever is the opposite of what you desire in a mate)? I mean if you were straight would you let god fuck you and suck his cock?I mean who are you to say no right?

no offense, but doesn't giving god a facial make him/her seem a bit less godly and pure?

...
 

Wow. I cannot believe this thread was ever made!? :confused: :hmm: Wish I was a super mod.

It's actually a pretty normal thread for TFP..

I would....hell, I've called out his name enough times when with mortals....

...
 

I'm not quite sure what you mean by "normal". Not really important though. By the way, a lot of the time when I drop things, I say shit. Doesn't mean I'd want to roll around in it. Know what I'm sayin.

I'm really not sure that I do. I think you disapprove of the thread, but I'm not getting the reasoning.

No I would not.
I would love to make a copy of my self and have sex with my self now thats hot.

I guess I should have made it clear that the last comment I made was directed towards ngdawg. I'm sure she'll get the shit comment. Atleast I hope she will. If not, owell.

I didn't offer reasoning. I can't believe the disrespect isn't apparent. I'm sure there are people on here that would get offended if I made a thread about having sex with their mom, sister, dad, dog, wife, etc. Why is a religious figure any different? That is just how I feel. I am not a moderator, so what I feel on the issue really makes no difference.

I have pointed out for other people on this site that if they don't like a thread, leave it alone. So, I will do just that.

Im sure the person that made this thread didn't mean to disrespect any of those who believe and respect God.

An eternity of uncomfortable silence...

You never call.. you never pray...

Definitely not if he looks like an old man with a long white beard. I wouldn't mind a session with that eastern goddess with lots of arms and lots of breasts.

I did have sex with God once. She faked orgasm. I think she was trying to help me feel less inadequate. Well it was a bit disturbing with her shouting out "Oh Jesus! I'm gonna come". She still wanted her $75 though. Called it her "collection money".

I suppose the nearest thing to really having sex with God would be to have sex with a priest. But I'm not sure I want to start that thread.

Does this really belong in philosophy? :)

if god was a physical being then yes of course i would! i could sell my story!

dont nuns wait their entire lives to have sex/marry with god in the afterlife???

....just a thought

Since this is purely hypothetical. A goal in life is to be a servant of G-d. So if that was G-d's desire then yes.

lol Xazy

i loved how you washed your hands of G-ds 'wrath' by saying "since this is purely hypothetical" before you started..wouldnt want the old man upstairs upset would we

I think they do! I guess if there was a bunch of nuns of tfp, this could be a good question for them!! :lol: o me o my.

This Whole thing "sex with God" is extremely dangerous and Demonic. If you are a brave soul search on these two words "Incubus" and "Succubus"

Incubus: an evil spirit that lies on persons in their sleep; especially one that has sexual intercourse with women while they are sleeping

Succubus: a demon assuming female form to have sexual intercourse with men in their sleep.

In this Link you can read about masturbation and people who thought they were having sex with Jesus. but it really turned out to be demons. Though you need to scroll down a bit till you get to a heading "Sex with Demons"

http://net-burst.net/sexuality/masturbate.htm

PLEASE READ WITH THE MOST ABSOLUT CAUTION.

I heard this Jewish Chick had sex with God a while ago, and the world hasn't been right since.

Actually, I had sex with God a couple times a day when I was a teenager, until I heard that it could make me go blind.

Flip side, I always did like that pic of Loviatar in the original AD&D Deities and Demigods book. I'd give her a tumble. Maybe Bast too, if only for the self-referential aspect of getting a bit of .... well, nevermind.

That said, and seriously, as I undertand what people call god, if you could have sex with it, it wouldn't be god.

I would.

In fact, I've said in the past that if I could have sex with a historical figure, I would choose Jesus.

To me it seems like the ultimate form of souls communing.

I've never thought of the idea of God as in any way sexual arousing. Perhaps you have a different God than the christian one that I got raised with...

I don't like this thread. Here's my contribution to the general lameness: (Off the Wayside)

We talking father, son, holy ghost god? Because I don't know that I'm up for a foursome with god, and I have this thing about sticking to one diety at a time. Furthermore, I've already got a goddess.

That aside though, sure. It'd be divine.

And can you imagine the pillow talk?

on the topic of weather this thread is disrespectful. god gave us the ability to talk smack and have some fun. im sure god is humble enough, just like i am, to take a joke...and pretty damn proud that we're using our ability to make em'

i masterbate regularly so i think that counts. (messianic complex)

what if god was the wrong gender for your sexual orientation? I mean you know its still gonna be hot.....


Id go for it regardless.

Fuck, no. Spank, yes.

I think it depends on what god looks like... like lets say god is a all powerful all knowing bowl of pudding... yeah good chance i wouldnt do it. but if god was in the form of a woman sure why not i bet she could teach some crazy tricks. And as far as pleasing god.... if i suck in bed with her its her damn fault she made me maybe she would help me out a bit and stick some cool sex tricks in my brain for me. never know. but... if god was a attractive woman that just happened to randomly turn into a poptart... it could burn and might not be a good idea. so i guess i would have to get to know her really well first. but thats always the best idea for anyone you have sex with.

Even if there is a god, you might well call it masturbation. :p


If I could have sex with god, would I?

Sure. I do every night... "Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God!"

I have to echo that. God is love, and the love between man and woman comes from God. Making love is a physical manifestation of that.

I like the concept in India where the universe is created out of the overflow of two gods making love. :)


On to more philosophical concepts:
I like to believe that making love is a mindset - one that goes on all day long. I also believe that we are all connected with each other, inseparable from God, so that would mean, that the answer to your question is:

Yes. And I do. All the time.

Sex is a physical act, whereas God exists in the same way that Love and Jealousy exist . . . ie as abstract concepts.

Its a nonsense question . . its like saying "would you have have sex with jealousy?" or "would you like to play tennis with Marxism?".

the long white beard is kind of a turn-off for me...

Hey I've had sex with airbrushed playboy centerfolds - as long as the 'concept' has staples in their belly - I'm in!

My wife says God a lot during sex. I guess she would have to answer yes to this question. ;)

Or asking a piece of lint if it wants some cheese?

Sorry, but this thread nneds more of that. I'm just picturing mutant Canadian doubles with Marx, Engles, Lenin, and Mao on one side of the net and me on the other. "Engles and Marx are engaged in a frank and animated discussion of the historical dialectic while Mao and Lenin stare coldly at each other. Here's the service, and..... Another Ace! 40-Love. We'd like to remind the audience that the winner of this match gets a night of romance with... GOD Himself!"

But your point is taken - Marxism is the idea, not the ideators, and God is a, to be a tad perjorative, a semantic convenience to encompass a bunch of not necessarily related ideas.

I'd not play tenis with Marxism.

Billiards, maybe.

:lol:

LMFAO!! I like that.

I knew a stripper who claimed to have done a few private shows for James Earl Jones. Can you imagine? JEJ directing his lapdancer: "Bend. Ovah." Yikes--A little intimidating, to say the least!

I would mind going birding with Quantum Flux. Or hitting a few clubs with Tyranny.

I definitely wouldn't play dice with the Universe, though. ;)

God is a spirit so you can not have sex with him. When we use the language exist a problem: consider God as a male! As you can see exist an important point here: the limitation of our human language.
God is not a man... or a woman, it doesn't matter what our languaje says.

No.

If he really is the father/creator of all of us wouldn't that be a little incestuous?

Hum.... Sex with God? No way in hell.
Ok, how many of you have had the clingy ex, that after you ahd sex, latched on and ot anoyin in he extream? I see that as God. God already demands total devotion, then you tack on the emotional cling atachment thing, total clingon. And how do we deal with clingons? We dump them after we just can't take anymore because we can't get any personal space or time alone, and they just can't understand that. And what do clinons tend to do? Stalk. Keep showing up at odd times, calling saying "we can work it out" and getting more and more crazy as time goes on. Now, tack unlimeted cosmic power onto the clingy bitch. Nope. Not going to happen. I'll keep my relationship with God as it stands now.

hehehe

and to the OP yes, i would.. because if we all are part of some energy or what some call 'God' and we have that energy or 'spirit' in us... aren't we already having sex with some form of the energy or God when we have sex with each other?

sweetpea

Would you rather have this in humor? :)