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-   -   Have you seen the fnords? (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-paranoia/42655-have-you-seen-fnords.html)

xim 01-22-2004 11:26 PM

Have you seen the fnords?
 
I was just curious how many people have seen the fnords. . .

flutter_girl 01-23-2004 04:53 AM

the whats? um, what are they? (it may be really obvious, but i have no idea)

Redlemon 01-23-2004 08:17 AM

I can feel them, I know that the fnords are there, but I just can't see them.

And, what's a fnord? It's simple:
Quote:

Fnord?

Fnord is evaporated herbal tea without the herbs.

Fnord is that funny feeling you get when you reach for the
Snickers bar and come back holding a slurpee.

Fnord is the 43 1/3rd state, next to Wyoming.
Fnord is this really, really tall mountain.
Fnord is the reason boxes of condoms carry twelve instead of ten.

Fnord is the blue stripes in the road that never get painted.
Fnord is place where those socks vanish off to in the laundry.
Fnord is an arcade game like Pacman without the little dots.
Fnord is a little pufflike cloud you see at 5pm.

Fnord is the tool the dentist uses on unruly patients.
Fnord is the blank paper that cassette labels are printed on.
Fnord is where the buses hide at night.
Fnord is the empty pages at the end of the book.

Fnord is the screw that falls from the car for no reason.
Fnord is why Burger King uses paper instead of foam.
Fnord is the little green pebble in your shoe.
Fnord is the orange print in the yellow pages.


Fnord is a pickle without the bumps. Fnord is why ducks eat trees.
Fnord is toast without bread. Fnord is a venetian blind without the slats.


Fnord is the lint in the navel of the mites that eat
the lint in the navel of the mites that eat
the lint in Fnord's navel.

Fnord is an apostrophe on drugs.
Fnord is the bucket where they keep the unused serifs for H*lvetica.
Fnord is the gunk that sticks to the inside of your car's fenders.
Fnord is the source of all the zero bits in your computer.

Fnord is the echo of silence.
Fnord is the parsley on the plate of life.
Fnord is the sales tax on happiness.
Fnord is the preposition at the end of sixpence.

Fnord is the feeling in your brain when you hold your breath too long.
Fnord is the reason latent homosexuals stay latent.

Fnord is the donut hole.
Fnord is the whole donut.

Fnord is an annoying series of email messages.
Fnord is the color only blind people can see.

Fnord is the serial number on a box of
cereal.

Fnord is the Universe with decreasing entropy.
Fnord is a naked woman with herpes simplex 428.
Fnord is the yin without yang.
Fnord is a pyrotumescent retrograde onyx obelisk.

Fnord is why lisp has so many parentheses.
Fnord is the the four-leaf clover with a missing leaf.

Fnord is double-jointed and has a cubic spline.
Fnord never sleeps.
Fnord is the "een" in baleen whale.

Fnord is neither a particle nor a wave.

Fnord is the space in between the pixels on your screen.

Fnord is the guy that writes the Infiniti ads.
Fnord is the nut in peanut butter and jelly.
Fnord is an antebellum flagellum fella.

Fnord is a sentient vacuum cleaner.

Fnord is the smallest number greater than zero.
Fnord lives in the empty space above a decimal point.


Fnord is the odd-colored scale on a dragon's back.
Fnord is the redundant coin slot on arcade games.
Fnord was last seen in Omaha, Nebraska.

Fnord is the founding father of the phrase "founding father".
Fnord is the last bit of sand you can't get out of your shoe.
Fnord is Jesus's speech advisor.
Fnord keeps a spare eyebrow in his pocket.
Fnord invented the green hubcap.
Fnord is why doctors ask you to cough.

Fnord is the "ooo" in varooom of race cars.
Fnord uses two bathtubs at once.



I cannot escape them
No matter how I try
They wait for me everywhere
I cannot pass them by.

Driving down the street
I see "Jesus Is Lord"
And then immediately after
I hear the word "FNORD!"

Innocuous sayings and parables
And on the evening news
I hear the word "FNORD!"
And suddenly I'm confused

I sit alone in my room
And I'm feeling rather bored
I turn on the tube and guess what
I hear the word "FNORD!"

"Don't see the fnords and they won't eat you"
That's what I've heard the wisemen say
But I can't get away from those beasties
There's just no fucking way.

gilada 01-23-2004 08:53 AM

No one can be told what the fnords are....

sadistikdreams 01-23-2004 08:43 PM

The fnord is all around you.
You feel it when you wash your hands.
You feel it when you pay your taxes...

cait987 01-23-2004 09:49 PM

Im not sure what a fnord is but I own a friendly ford haha hmm but as far as I can see everyone has seen a fnord if you go through the entire list redlemon posted ><

Fire 01-24-2004 12:03 AM

I see the fnords- Submit, serve the illuminati

Fire 01-24-2004 12:03 AM

And (not or) all hail Eris- all hail discordia

Redlemon 01-24-2004 06:15 PM

And, if you wish, hail Bob. Slack for everyone!

Tophat665 01-24-2004 07:07 PM

Yes and no. I think it's gotten a lot more sophisticated than fnord at this point, and I think I've seen some of that going on.

vapusforever 01-24-2004 07:40 PM

Im totally lost. Maybe im just a retard, but i still have no idea what "fnords" are after reading everything...

Tophat665 01-24-2004 08:04 PM

If you are totally lost reading this thread, then you have never read the Illuminatus! trilogy by Robert Shea and Robert Anton Wilson. They explain fnords in pretty close detail.

For those of you who have seen the Fnords, or at least felt them, have you seen the squinks?

Redlemon 01-26-2004 02:12 PM

centie is a pink.

rev_skarekroe 01-30-2004 11:18 AM

I fnord haven't.

skier 01-31-2004 04:37 PM

No fnords yet, but i have seen a scallywager

TerresqueÜ 02-01-2004 07:48 PM

My brain hurts....this seems a bit too surreal.

xim 02-02-2004 01:02 PM

isnt a squink midway between a squid and a skunk?


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