Falling for nothing - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Czernobog · 07-30-2003, 05:17 PM

I hate the fact that I want her.

I hate the look she gives me.

I hate feeling helpless.

I don't even know who she is.

Do I fall? Do I join the angels in the abyss?

The hole in myself could be filled, my soul made whole, if I could bring myself to love.

To open my heart is to have it cut out.

To confide in another is to be ridiculed for who I am.

Would she be any different? Would she take me in her arms, and comfort me, and allow herself to be comforted?

Would she love me, truly, without shame?

I cast myself into the pit, and never will know.

And I hate myself for it.

Czernobog · 07-30-2003, 05:27 PM

Well, instead of making a new thread for each of my postings, I'm just going to make this thread my personal writing place. This is going to be some pretty personal stuff, just warning you all in advance. But I think it'll do me some good to share it. I guess we'll see.
-----------------------------------------------------
Tears wont come to my eyes now
I think I just ran out
No matter how I push or scream or try
They seem to leave me dry
I feel it burn inside my chest
As sorrow fills my life
But pressing up into my throat
the sobs still get choked down
I cant feel the prick anymore
of salt that stings my eyes
or rivers down my cheeks and chin
The taste of tears inside
And if I think too long on this
It makes things even worse
I want to cry for lack of tears
To scream and sob and curse
But nothing comes
My eyes are dry
And even through the pain
I feel myself just push it down

J.R.V.A. · 07-31-2003, 05:23 AM

Very good stuff, I can really relate to the first one. Thanks

maximus · 07-31-2003, 07:40 AM

wow, did you write those about me? hope to read more.

Eowyn_Vala · 08-01-2003, 06:37 AM

Wonderful and very moving, especially the second one. So few words, yet such overwhelming emotion!

punkgrl1984 · 08-01-2003, 09:52 PM

I feel like you took a page out of my journal. I can really relate to your emotions

Czernobog · 08-03-2003, 08:17 PM

Here is the next installment of my ongoing literature saga. I hope you enjoy it.
---------------------------------------------------
Who shall care for us,
those who have fallen for love,
those who have died in rage,
those who have been cut down by indifference.
Who shall hear us,
those who have fallen for lust,
those who have died in anger
those who have been cut down by neglect.
Who shall save us,
we who have fallen, died, and been cut down.
who have been denied and defiled,
ignored and rejected.
We who are damned.

Minx · 08-03-2003, 08:41 PM

I like your writings very much. The second one in particular moved me. Looking forward to seeing more, and please...never be afraid to share here!

Czernobog · 08-05-2003, 03:58 PM

Kiss my shame,
Love my rage,
Hold my hate in your arms.

Drink my tears,
Consume my lust,
Roll my pain on your tounge.

Can you accept myself,
If I cannot?
Can you see my essence,
If I am blind?
Can you hear my sorrow,
If I am deaf?

My shame,
my rage,
my hate,
my tears,
my lust,
my pain.
my essence,
my sorrow.
These are mine.

But you are my hope.

Czernobog · 08-05-2003, 04:04 PM

Will you come for me in twilight,
When the day is at an end?
Will you sing to me in darkness,
When night my wounds will mend?
Will you comfort me at midnight,
Twelve times the bell will toll.
Will you be there when the day breaks,
To see daylight free my soul?

SaltPork · 08-05-2003, 07:21 PM

Nice collection, Czernobog.

07-30-2003, 05:17 PM	#1 (permalink)
Czernobog Insane Location: NJ	Falling for nothing I hate the fact that I want her. I hate the look she gives me. I hate feeling helpless. I don't even know who she is. Do I fall? Do I join the angels in the abyss? The hole in myself could be filled, my soul made whole, if I could bring myself to love. To open my heart is to have it cut out. To confide in another is to be ridiculed for who I am. Would she be any different? Would she take me in her arms, and comfort me, and allow herself to be comforted? Would she love me, truly, without shame? I cast myself into the pit, and never will know. And I hate myself for it. __________________ Embrace the flame

07-30-2003, 05:27 PM	#2 (permalink)
Czernobog Insane Location: NJ	Well, instead of making a new thread for each of my postings, I'm just going to make this thread my personal writing place. This is going to be some pretty personal stuff, just warning you all in advance. But I think it'll do me some good to share it. I guess we'll see. ----------------------------------------------------- Tears wont come to my eyes now I think I just ran out No matter how I push or scream or try They seem to leave me dry I feel it burn inside my chest As sorrow fills my life But pressing up into my throat the sobs still get choked down I cant feel the prick anymore of salt that stings my eyes or rivers down my cheeks and chin The taste of tears inside And if I think too long on this It makes things even worse I want to cry for lack of tears To scream and sob and curse But nothing comes My eyes are dry And even through the pain I feel myself just push it down __________________ Embrace the flame

07-31-2003, 05:23 AM	#3 (permalink)
J.R.V.A. Junkie Location: Utah	Very good stuff, I can really relate to the first one. Thanks __________________ And as she plays, her sweet song of laughter floats through the air and warms my heart

07-31-2003, 07:40 AM	#4 (permalink)
maximus Crazy Location: Pa	wow, did you write those about me? hope to read more. __________________ i don't want to be lonely, i just want to be alone.

08-01-2003, 06:37 AM	#5 (permalink)
Eowyn_Vala Insane Location: There's no place like home..	Wonderful and very moving, especially the second one. So few words, yet such overwhelming emotion! __________________ Cain: I know what you're doing. I've lead troops into battle before. DG: And, how am I doing? Cain: Well, there's less hugging when I do it

08-01-2003, 09:52 PM	#6 (permalink)
punkgrl1984 Tilted	I feel like you took a page out of my journal. I can really relate to your emotions __________________ [COLOR=Purple]life's what happens when you are busy making other plans -John Lennon[/COLOR]

08-03-2003, 08:17 PM	#7 (permalink)
Czernobog Insane Location: NJ	Here is the next installment of my ongoing literature saga. I hope you enjoy it. --------------------------------------------------- Who shall care for us, those who have fallen for love, those who have died in rage, those who have been cut down by indifference. Who shall hear us, those who have fallen for lust, those who have died in anger those who have been cut down by neglect. Who shall save us, we who have fallen, died, and been cut down. who have been denied and defiled, ignored and rejected. We who are damned. __________________ Embrace the flame

08-03-2003, 08:41 PM	#8 (permalink)
Minx Junkie Location: Up yonder	I like your writings very much. The second one in particular moved me. Looking forward to seeing more, and please...never be afraid to share here! __________________ You've been a naughty boy....go to my room!

08-05-2003, 03:58 PM	#9 (permalink)
Czernobog Insane Location: NJ	Kiss my shame, Love my rage, Hold my hate in your arms. Drink my tears, Consume my lust, Roll my pain on your tounge. Can you accept myself, If I cannot? Can you see my essence, If I am blind? Can you hear my sorrow, If I am deaf? My shame, my rage, my hate, my tears, my lust, my pain. my essence, my sorrow. These are mine. But you are my hope. __________________ Embrace the flame

08-05-2003, 04:04 PM	#10 (permalink)
Czernobog Insane Location: NJ	Will you come for me in twilight, When the day is at an end? Will you sing to me in darkness, When night my wounds will mend? Will you comfort me at midnight, Twelve times the bell will toll. Will you be there when the day breaks, To see daylight free my soul? __________________ Embrace the flame

08-05-2003, 07:21 PM	#11 (permalink)
SaltPork Everything's better with bacon Location: In your local grocer's freezer.	Nice collection, Czernobog. __________________ It was like that when I got here....I swear.