Why are some gay men anal retentive? - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

xjumper84 · 09-01-2005, 02:06 AM

I am currently living with 2 other room mates. One of them is gay, the other is not. The gay one is super anal retentive. Anything, and I mean ANYTHING will spark him off and start yelling at you. For instance tonight. They both come home drunk (I've spent the evening driving all over the state of California) and the other straight one says "you're a bitch". So I reply with 'atleast i'm not living with a guy in my room who snores, which causes me to sleep on the couch every night'. (i live in the single in the 2 bedroom apartment.

The gay guy comes out and says "you mother fucker. This weekend you're sleeping in my room so that you can understand what its like to hear my snore and keep your bitch ass up all night."

WHAT THE FUCK? why is he always in a pissy ass mood. I do so much for this [[BEEP. This is the emergency edit system. Please remember to always post in a civilized manner and avoid the use of offensive slurs. BEEP BEEP BEEP]] and I never get the respect I deserve ( he breaks his stereo equipment, i replace it temporarily with mine, I do the dishes every damn day cause he doesn't do shit. I cook him meals cause he's too busy watching tv.)

Why does he feel to have the need to "take, take, take" and then get mad if you point him out on things?

/enough ranting for me this evening, I want to know your thoughts.

SecretMethod70 · 09-01-2005, 02:50 AM

Hate to burst your stereotypical bubble, but plenty of people are like this - gay or not. It's called being an ass and it's not exclusive to any sexual orientation.

Or, maybe he's just an angry drunk.

Nisses · 09-01-2005, 03:22 AM

jup, either an ass of an angry drunk

I'll go for ass tho, since from what I can make out, it's a pattern.

And if he's got that big of a mouth, I'd go off on him in the same manner. Or maybe even a little worse.

Also, stop putting up your stuff as "spare-parts" for him to use.

Daniel_ · 09-01-2005, 03:46 AM

Anal Retentive.

Gay Guy.

/me refuses to make obvious crass joke.

Thorny · 09-01-2005, 04:47 AM

Growing up gay in Amurica pretty much guarantees that you'll end up damaged. Society constantly bludgeons you for it. Sure, assholes abound, and lots of people have rough childhood/adolescent years, but gays get a head start.

That doesn't do much to excuse the behavior, though. I've dated guys that feel entitled to be bitchy because to them, that's gay culture. That can be entertaining...for about five minutes. Waiter! Check, please.

I'd say start thinking about a new roommate, except it seems there's something else going on. You set him up with music, do his dishes, and cook his dinner?

xjumper84 · 09-01-2005, 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thorny

I'd say start thinking about a new roommate, except it seems there's something else going on. You set him up with music, do his dishes, and cook his dinner?

Don't get thinking here that I'm attracted to him... or anything of the sort. Women for me! (thank you very much). I'm looking into the option of new roommates and I think I can move out next week (contract issues).

Is there any way to "deal with an ass" or is it just to let him do his thing and not let it affect me?

Daniel_ · 09-01-2005, 11:45 AM

Stop being his housekeeper for a start.

xjumper84 · 09-01-2005, 11:47 AM

So just do my OWN dishes, clean pots and pans for my usage. Take my things back and move out next week?

Sage · 09-01-2005, 12:06 PM

Yeah, that sounds about right... you don't care for this guy, you're not attracted to him, he's acting like a dick, so why are you treating him like your best friend or girlfriend? He's old enough to afford an apartment, he's old enough to clean up/feed himself. He sounds like a total leech- and that can happen no matter what sexual orientation you are.

KellyC · 09-01-2005, 01:03 PM

You have a pretty high tolerance level. I don't even put up with this kind of shit from my own brothers.

Bill O'Rights · 09-01-2005, 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xjumper84

I never get the respect I deserve ( he breaks his stereo equipment, i replace it temporarily with mine, I do the dishes every damn day cause he doesn't do shit. I cook him meals cause he's too busy watching tv.)
Why does he feel to have the need to "take, take, take" and then get mad if you point him out on things?

Hmmm...let's explore that, shall we?
Let's see...beause you let him!?!?

StanT · 09-01-2005, 01:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xjumper84

Is there any way to "deal with an ass" or is it just to let him do his thing and not let it affect me?

The best way to deal with an ass, is to not deal with him. Life is too short to deal with people like this. Move out and move on.

thingstodo · 09-04-2005, 09:26 AM

I pretty much agree with everything said here. Leave - don't put up with it - everyone can be an asshole.

Cynthetiq · 09-06-2005, 01:38 PM

please make sure you read my sig carefully:

I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, Indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Independent, either you're an asshole or you're not.

questone · 09-15-2005, 07:31 PM

Plenty of people are like this - gay or not

martinguerre · 09-15-2005, 08:28 PM

oh, i'd chime in...but it's all been said.

09-01-2005, 02:06 AM	#1 (permalink)
xjumper84 Upright	Why are some gay men anal retentive? I am currently living with 2 other room mates. One of them is gay, the other is not. The gay one is super anal retentive. Anything, and I mean ANYTHING will spark him off and start yelling at you. For instance tonight. They both come home drunk (I've spent the evening driving all over the state of California) and the other straight one says "you're a bitch". So I reply with 'atleast i'm not living with a guy in my room who snores, which causes me to sleep on the couch every night'. (i live in the single in the 2 bedroom apartment. The gay guy comes out and says "you mother fucker. This weekend you're sleeping in my room so that you can understand what its like to hear my snore and keep your bitch ass up all night." WHAT THE FUCK? why is he always in a pissy ass mood. I do so much for this [[BEEP. This is the emergency edit system. Please remember to always post in a civilized manner and avoid the use of offensive slurs. BEEP BEEP BEEP]] and I never get the respect I deserve ( he breaks his stereo equipment, i replace it temporarily with mine, I do the dishes every damn day cause he doesn't do shit. I cook him meals cause he's too busy watching tv.) Why does he feel to have the need to "take, take, take" and then get mad if you point him out on things? /enough ranting for me this evening, I want to know your thoughts. Last edited by SecretMethod70; 09-01-2005 at 02:42 AM..

09-01-2005, 02:50 AM	#2 (permalink)
SecretMethod70 Human Administrator Location: Chicago	Hate to burst your stereotypical bubble, but plenty of people are like this - gay or not. It's called being an ass and it's not exclusive to any sexual orientation. Or, maybe he's just an angry drunk. __________________ Le temps détruit tout "Musicians are the carriers and communicators of spirit in the most immediate sense." - Kurt Elling

09-01-2005, 03:22 AM	#3 (permalink)
Nisses Shade Location: Belgium	jup, either an ass of an angry drunk I'll go for ass tho, since from what I can make out, it's a pattern. And if he's got that big of a mouth, I'd go off on him in the same manner. Or maybe even a little worse. Also, stop putting up your stuff as "spare-parts" for him to use. __________________ Moderation should be moderately moderated.

09-01-2005, 03:46 AM	#4 (permalink)
Daniel_ Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It! Location: Southern England	Anal Retentive. Gay Guy. /me refuses to make obvious crass joke. __________________ ╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗ Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air, And deep beneath the rolling waves, In labyrinths of Coral Caves, The Echo of a distant time Comes willowing across the sand; And everthing is Green and Submarine ╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝

09-01-2005, 11:45 AM	#7 (permalink)
Daniel_ Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It! Location: Southern England	Stop being his housekeeper for a start. __________________ ╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗ Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air, And deep beneath the rolling waves, In labyrinths of Coral Caves, The Echo of a distant time Comes willowing across the sand; And everthing is Green and Submarine ╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝

09-01-2005, 04:47 AM	#5 (permalink)
Thorny Upright Location: Ohio	Growing up gay in Amurica pretty much guarantees that you'll end up damaged. Society constantly bludgeons you for it. Sure, assholes abound, and lots of people have rough childhood/adolescent years, but gays get a head start. That doesn't do much to excuse the behavior, though. I've dated guys that feel entitled to be bitchy because to them, that's gay culture. That can be entertaining...for about five minutes. Waiter! Check, please. I'd say start thinking about a new roommate, except it seems there's something else going on. You set him up with music, do his dishes, and cook his dinner?

09-01-2005, 11:47 AM	#8 (permalink)
xjumper84 Upright	So just do my OWN dishes, clean pots and pans for my usage. Take my things back and move out next week?

09-01-2005, 12:06 PM	#9 (permalink)
Sage hoarding all the big girl panties since 2005 Location: North side	Yeah, that sounds about right... you don't care for this guy, you're not attracted to him, he's acting like a dick, so why are you treating him like your best friend or girlfriend? He's old enough to afford an apartment, he's old enough to clean up/feed himself. He sounds like a total leech- and that can happen no matter what sexual orientation you are. __________________ Sage knows our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's She answers hard acrostics, has a pretty taste for paradox She quotes in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus In conics she can floor peculiarities parabolous -C'hi

09-01-2005, 01:03 PM	#10 (permalink)
KellyC Comment or else!! Location: Home sweet home	You have a pretty high tolerance level. I don't even put up with this kind of shit from my own brothers. __________________ Him: Ok, I have to ask, what do you believe? Me: Shit happens.

09-04-2005, 09:26 AM	#13 (permalink)
thingstodo A Storm Is Coming Location: The Great White North	I pretty much agree with everything said here. Leave - don't put up with it - everyone can be an asshole. __________________ If you're wringing your hands you can't roll up your shirt sleeves. Stangers have the best candy.

09-06-2005, 01:38 PM	#14 (permalink)
Cynthetiq Tilted Cat Head Administrator Location: Manhattan, NY	please make sure you read my sig carefully: I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, Indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Independent, either you're an asshole or you're not.

09-15-2005, 07:31 PM	#15 (permalink)
questone Crazy	Plenty of people are like this - gay or not

09-15-2005, 08:28 PM	#16 (permalink)
martinguerre whosoever Location: New England	oh, i'd chime in...but it's all been said. __________________ For God so loved creation, that God sent God's only Son that whosoever believed should not perish, but have everlasting life. -John 3:16