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maleficent 04-06-2005 05:48 AM

Procrastinating
 
Procrastinators: Don’t put off reading this!


2005Haven’t done your taxes? Still won’t have them done by April 14? You are not alone. If you avoid making decisions or you make big plans and then never carry them out, you just may be one of the 20 percent of Americans who are chronic procrastinators. “Today” contributor Dr. Gail Saltz, a psychiatrist with New York Presbyterian Hospital, was invited on the show to discuss this topic, a subject she wrote about for a recent issue of Parade magazine.

“David” is looking miserable as he recounts to his wife that once again he has to pay a late penalty for failing to turn in his taxes on time. "I never get those tax forms right anyway," he explains. He is angry with himself, and feels guilty that this delay will now cost him the money he was saving for the family vacation. His family and friends have been calling him lazy for years. It seems to him the harder he tries to "get it right" the worse his procrastinating gets.

“Maria” had always gotten things done on time — until she was up for a promotion. Then suddenly this very efficient and conscientious woman started delaying the execution of her assignments. She knew she was messing up her chances for advancement, but she also knew that her husband felt threatened by her climbing higher on the corporate ladder than he was.

David is one of the 20 percent of Americans who are chronic procrastinators. Almost every aspect of their life is affected by their behavior. Maria, on the other hand, is an occasional procrastinator, reacting to a specific dilemma in only one arena of her life.

Almost everyone procrastinates some of the time, and the results can bring anything from annoyance to complete misery — both to the person doing it, and to those affected by it.

Research has shown that procrastinators tend to feel extremely stressed, resulting in more insomnia, colds and stomach aches than non-procrastinators. They also smoke and drink more.

In one survey of 300 college students who confessed to being procrastinators, 47 percent said they would rather donate blood than write an assigned paper, almost a third said they would rather visit the dentist, and more than one in five said they would rather pick up trash on campus than get their paper done.

Men and women are both prone to procrastination, and both sexes suffer anxiety as the most common symptom. But in addition, women suffer from guilt nearly twice as often as men.

The idea that procrastinators are simply lazy is a myth. Most often procrastination is caused by fear. If you were simply lazy, you might respond by giving yourself a good kick in the pants, but procrastination can't be solved in that way.

Too often procrastinators receive the advice, from professionals or loved ones, to simply "quit it." In other words, to change the behavior alone. But it's not that simple.


In order to make any lasting change in your patterns of behavior, you need to understand what "story" is motivating you to procrastinate in the first place. You have to change your way of thinking about what it means to get things done.

Here are the two most common reasons for procrastinating:

1. Fear of failure.
The most common story is "I'm so afraid of failing that I would rather not try at all, than try and fail." These people tend to be perfectionists. Doing a task and having it be "just okay" is mortifying. In addition, this type of procrastinator believes that he or she needs to please others in order to be accepted. This was what happened with David.

David came to understand that he was afraid of failing. He imagined screwing up on his taxes, screwing up his job, and even being a big disappointment in his relationships. So he avoided doing many things in order to try and spare himself the chance for failure. He then came to see that he had screwed them all up by procrastinating. This understanding helped him to change his behavior and improve his life.

2. Fear of success
The opposite story can also result in procrastination. "I'm afraid to be successful because people will envy me or see me as a threat, and then I'll lose them." You may fear success because you think that if you succeed you'll then be expected to be wildly successful all the time, or you'll become a workaholic, or that you are not deserving of success. This is Maria's story.

Maria was afraid of her current success because it threatened her competitive husband. Once she understood that, Maria was able to catch herself delaying her work and forge ahead. She was also able to discuss her feelings with her husband, who realized that his envy of her was misplaced and became far more supportive.

Turning understanding into action
Figuring out which fears you have and why you have them is an important first step. So is taking notice of the particular situations that tend to trigger your procrastinating. The specific arena of life where you procrastinate (work, love life, friends, your body, money) will clue you in as to where you feel most conflicted and afraid. It is likely to be the arena of life that is most important to you at this time.

(For those living or working with a procrastinator — which, of course, can be exasperating — rather than blaming them, which only perpetuates the cycle of anxiety and procrastination, explain to them the story you see them acting out. Tell them you want to help them break the cycle.)

Tips for the procrastinator
1. Prioritize tasks.
When everything seems like a priority, you feel overwhelmed and get nothing done. Alternatively, if nothing seems important, then nothing gets done either. Therefore, start small and make a "to do" list with the most important items first, and then work your way down.

2. Control your impulses
Most procrastinators jump from one task to the next and never get any one done. Make yourself complete one task before moving on to another.

3. Don't expect overnight success.
Old habits die hard. Don't expect things to change immediately. If you change one thing a week, you are making progress, and that progress will show you that more change is possible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Are you a procrastinator? What do you usually procrastinate? What does it take for you to finally get something done... If you aren't a procrastinator, what's your secret? How do you priortize your life?

HAL3000 04-06-2005 06:17 AM

I almost procrastinated answering this thread. :lol:

frogza 04-06-2005 06:20 AM

The only time I procrastinate is when I need to respond to something that I am angry about. I want to have the time to think things over and maybe cool down before responding and saying something stupid.

JustJess 04-06-2005 06:55 AM

I procrastinate constantly, about a million different things. From those two "types"... I'd say I've had both. Why do I? I don’t honestly know. It’s like there’s this invisible rubber room I’m stuck in that never quite allows me to reach my goal – whether it’s sending a thank you card or finishing a work project. I do finish things at work far more regularly than at home… but some things remain “on the back burner” indefinitely.
I dunno, I just suck at that kind of thing. Quadro is MUCH better at it.

guthmund 04-06-2005 09:42 AM

I procrastinate.

Why put off today what can be put off a few days from now? It's usually the little things that I tend to put off. Finishing a drawing, replacing a ceiling fan, mowing the lawn. Things like that. By and large, I do it because I'm lazy. I could fix that right now, but I think I'll just wait till a commercial, finish this crostic, or get to the next chapter.

Occasionally, laziness isn't the reason. I've been looking for a new job the last few weeks and have been draggin' my heels since the beginning. At first, I was excited, but after the first few "We'll have to call you back" blow offs, excitement turned to procrastination (fear of failure). Once I recognize this is what I'm doing, I refuse to let myself do it.

God of Thunder 04-06-2005 09:50 AM

I'm going to quit procrastinating tomorrow :lol:

I'm terrible about it. I tend to promise a lot of things and i really do plan on getting to them. And, I eventually will.

But if you want it done today, better go ask someone else.

StanT 04-06-2005 10:59 AM

Fear of failing ... fear of success? No need to over-analyze things, I'm just stinking lazy.

And no, my taxes aren't done, yet.

Rlyss 04-06-2005 11:47 AM

I know for a fact that it's not because I'm lazy. It's the fear of failure that prevents me from getting ahead, I know that for sure. Explaining that to anyone but the person/people closest to me is insanely difficult so to most people I'm sure it appears to be downright laziness. I'm not afraid of success (perhaps failing after being successful?) but I do know that I've had enough rejections to make me not want to hear another. Procrastinating is a way of controlling that, by saying 'If I'm going to be a failure it'll be on my terms, not on someone else's' It'll be my decision.' I know that's a horribly negative attitude but I'm starting to get out of it.

Grancey 04-06-2005 12:26 PM

I've got some really cool ideas on procrastination, so I'm going to go get a bite and put my ideas together. I'll get back to you.

Melka 04-06-2005 12:50 PM

I feel like I proscratinate about everything. Mainly with schoolwork, why not wait until the day of to study for the test when that's always got me a decent grade in the past. Maybe not the best grade possible, but one I can live with. A lot of times I find myself putting off really little things, especially calling people back when they leave me a message. I don't know having to work so hard to force myself to call my grandma or mom back is a fear of failure or success though.

Now, is it procrastination or just pure laziness when I find myself sitting on the couch, watching TV and having to go to the bathroom. But don't. Sometimes I just sit there, and wait until either I really HAVE to go or don't need to anymore. My excuse is usually that I was really comfortable and don't want to mess that up.

04-06-2005 02:09 PM

No, I am not a procrastinator. If anything I feel anxious when I am not getting as much done as I want, I want to do more and do it now which isn't always possible. I think learning to think through problems is an important skill and being able to organize and stay focused on why something must be done. Perhaps, I don't feel like ironing, but I know that tomorrow morning I will need that shirt. Focus keeps me on task.

sailor 04-06-2005 03:26 PM

Im procrastinating right now. I should be studying, but Im on TFP. Oh well.

quadro2000 04-07-2005 08:24 AM

I procrastinated quite a bit in high school (and, to a lesser extent, college), but never to a point where I was in any real danger. In my mind, the deadline that something is due is literally a deadline: after that date, it's simply unacceptable. I never thought "I hope my professor will let this slide." I thought, "if I don't get this in on this date, it will not count and I will get a failing grade." So although I wasted quite a lot of time, i still managed to get things done when they were supposed to get done. (The quality of work, of course, is a different story!)

I do something different now, in regards to my acting career. It's not so much that I procrastinate because I don't have anything specifically due, but I find myself not doing things that I SHOULD be doing because of fear of failure - i.e. in certain cases, I won't take a course that could give me some better tips or I won't go for a certain audition or work to get a certain director to see me - because I'm just afraid of doing all the work and not getting anywhere. I don't know if that really counts as procrastination or not, but I had to mention it because part of the article really resonated with me.

Grasshopper Green 04-07-2005 01:06 PM

I procrastinate on a few things, but most of the time I get things done on time. The few things that I do is because of fear of failure, I know (going back to college and looking for a new job). Day to day stuff I tend not to procrastinate on; my taxes were done a month ago :)

TM875 04-07-2005 08:15 PM

I agree with a lot of you. Right now, I'm procrastinating by being on the TFP.

Anyway, I don't procrastinate because I'm afraid of failure - success is what I live every second of my life for. I'm just really lazy.

I do, however, have some mental justification for it. I work much better under pressure. In 11th grade, my English teacher purposefully (didn't know this until later) deleted a 20-some slide Powerpoint off of my hard drive in order to make me redo it. Oh, did I mention this was 2 days before I was supposed to present? Of course, the final presentation was far better than the original.

In college, I quickly found that the less time and effort that I placed into a paper, the better my grade was. I still remember my freshmen seminar class - the first paper I spent 10 hours researching and writing in the library, and recieved an 85%. On future papers, I spent 45 minutes and used simple Internet resources. I beat the class average with mostly 95's.

Procrastination is an art - an art that will allow you to do many more things if you just practice it long enough.

EDIT: And I ALWAYS get everything done on time. I just usually wait until the last available chunk of time (Read: half hour before) to complete a project or proposal.

cellophanedeity 04-07-2005 08:53 PM

Ooh! I was hoping someone would post on this.

In my philosophy lecture on tuesday, Prof. Mark Kingwell (who I reccommed if you're into reading philosophy) discussed boredom and procrastination with us. What he explained is pretty much the following:

Boredom is the most paradoxical wish. It is the wish for a desire that one does not currently have. But instead of being because of a lack of stimulation, it is most commonly caused by overstimulation. Kingwell likened this feeling of boredom to looking through a fully stocked fridge, and saying "there is nothing to eat" or going through all of your clothes and saying "I have nothing to wear."

Procrastination on the other hand, is not wanting to have a desire that you don't have. So, you're overstimulated and bored with what you ought to be doing, but you don't wish to not want to do what you ought to do, so you put it off.

Yah, sorry if that made no sense. Try listening to a brilliant man talk at you at 500words/minute!

d*d 04-08-2005 05:33 AM

My name is d*d I have been a procrastinator for several years now.

tooth 04-08-2005 07:19 AM

Quote:

When everything seems like a priority, you feel overwhelmed and get nothing done. Alternatively, if nothing seems important, then nothing gets done either.
My life in a nutshell:(

analog 04-08-2005 07:49 AM

I'm a horrible procrastinator. I have really bad anxiety attacks sometimes, and that doesn't help when feeling overwhelmed.

I would love to be successful- but my main thing (like with my writing) is that I've spent so much time loving the art, that if I really got some scripts done, and submitted them, and they were rejected, i'd feel as though my one true love and talent is not so much a talent at all- and then i'd really have nothing to feel good about, talent-wise.

I've gotten lots of praise from many different people, always done well with my writing so, for all I know, my fears are total bullshit. The unfortunate thing, of course, is that my fear of failure in that arena, like my anxiety attacks, are largely uncontrollable. I am NOT taking a regimen of prescription drugs. They alter your mind's chemistry and put me in a disconnected haze all the time. I smoke (pot) sometimes to kill an existing attack (the only thing that works, works wonderfully, I don't even have to get stoned for it to work), but I need to stave off the attack before it starts sometimes or else just having had the attack scares me into not wanting to do whatever caused it again.

*leaves a window open to his soul*

darkangel 04-08-2005 07:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by analog
I'm a horrible procrastinator. I have really bad anxiety attacks sometimes, and that doesn't help when feeling overwhelmed.

I would love to be successful- but my main thing (like with my writing) is that I've spent so much time loving the art, that if I really got some scripts done, and submitted them, and they were rejected, i'd feel as though my one true love and talent is not so much a talent at all- and then i'd really have nothing to feel good about, talent-wise.

^^ Me too. Anixety attacks and the writing thing (and drawing). But yeah, I am a huge procrastinator. That's probably why I bombed out of college, was because I left projects, essays and exam studying till the very last night at 11pm. I believe I have the 'fear of failure' reason, that and sometimes I just really don't feel like doing something. I suppose sometimes when I did try with something (certain art projects and essays) and I would do horrible on them, there was that question, "Why even waste my time on this if I'm going to do bad anyway?"

Cynthetiq 04-08-2005 08:39 AM

I put my own deadlines BEFORE the drop dead dates so that I can hit the drop dead dates 100% of the time.

That way I can procrastinate if I want to knowing that I have some padded time.

I do this also when planning projects, I make sure there is some fluff time to procrastinate.

SiN 04-08-2005 08:43 AM

eh, i clicked the back button the first time i kinda read this.
















:D

Pip 04-10-2005 02:05 PM

Lots of procrastinators here, no big surprise! I'm one too. But I've done my taxes. For some strange reason I really enjoy doing my taxes as fast as possible. Nobody who knows me in real life believes me when I say that though.

VitaminH 04-10-2005 03:18 PM

I'll answer this later....I've got a test I'm (not) studying for right now...






P.S. I voted procrastinator ;)

BigGov 04-10-2005 06:06 PM

I'm a master procrastinator largely because I haven't run into a reason not to be. I'm rarely late, I get all work done on time.

Although, I just noticed that I procrastinated for about 2 hours before finishing this reply...

asudevil83 04-11-2005 01:31 PM

i think i have the WORST habits of procrastination.....and i dont just do it for one reason, i do it for many.

1.) i function much better when under pressure. when i'm not under a crunch i will put things off. if i start working, i'll lose focus very easily. but when things get down to the wire, i'll work my ass off to get it done.

2.) fear of failure. this mostly comes to my carreer. i think EVERY job i've EVER had ends with me feeling like i was ripped off. i'm a hard worker, and i do more than necessary to get things done. but no matter how hard i work, i dont get anywhere, and in fact it seems like i move backwards.

3.) i'm one of those guys who gets EXTREMELY bored if i'm not worrying about shit. if i'm procrastinating on something, then i can think about it and worry about it.

Artsemis 04-11-2005 02:20 PM

Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now

maxhooters 04-11-2005 03:27 PM

i would give you a reason but i will do it later

Elphaba 04-13-2005 04:37 PM

Professor Kingwell must know me. He describes my procrastination impetus perfectly.

Doctor_Max 04-13-2005 06:50 PM

I tend to procrastinate at almost everything. Finding a job, cutting the lawn, cleaning the house...you name it I've put it off. It's not the fear of failure, nor the fear of success.

I just really have a problem starting things. When I get the lawn mower out, I just zoom right through without taking breaks or anything. Once I started something, then I usually focus my 100% attention on it.

DDDDave 04-21-2005 10:42 AM

I think the most appropriate quote here is.....

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow."

--Mark Twain

tuner 05-21-2005 08:22 AM

I have the impression that people who are into internet forums, computers etc tend to be greater procrastinators than others. Any kind of addiction will eventually make you procrastinate...

Squishor 05-21-2005 09:45 AM

Hmm, I actually put off looking at this thread until now, over a month after it was posted. Once I read the article, I found it offered some useful information. I have a big whopping dose of type #1, as well as a bit of #2. It's nothing I didn't alteady know, but it's nice when someone else puts it into words. In fact, it's a part of myself I had put off trying to take a look at and figure out.

Ustwo 05-22-2005 07:10 PM

I am a master procrastinator.

Luckly I was so good at it, I learned the MINIMUM amount of time to get tasks done (well).

It rarely had a negative effect on my life, but it was often very close.

Seeker 05-22-2005 08:14 PM

K, I've procrastinated and now I have finally voted..

I think Prof. Kingwell sums it up pretty well (good job catching it Cello :thumbsup: )
I think when you have the chance to relax and stop worrying about things, you can also develop a sense of procrastination.. because you will have time to do that later. It can be a hard habit to get out of.

Xerxys 06-08-2009 08:48 PM

I procrastinate a lot on matters regardning family and calling them, I was supposed to call my sister today ... I'll do it tomorrow ... :D

snowy 06-08-2009 08:56 PM

Wow...I procrastinate so much that I voted in the original poll, but didn't reply until now...over 4 years later.

Actually, I've gotten much better about procrastination in the intervening years. Take this week, for instance. It's Finals Week. I have one final tomorrow, two on Wednesday, and one on Friday. I haven't put off studying till the last minute. I will look through my notes one more time before my final tomorrow, but otherwise, my studying for that is done. My two finals Wednesday? One is for a history class--it's two essays in class and we get the questions ahead of time. I've already outlined my answers. It's just a matter of cementing the information. The other final is for my family studies course, and the instructor gave us a study guide. I've finished half of it; it's really a matter of gathering together all the information I already possess into one central source. And I've already studied for my final on Friday--I'll just review my notes the night before and the morning of to make sure the information's there.

This is a definite improvement over how I used to be!

ItWasMe 06-08-2009 11:43 PM

I procrastinate when it comes to going to bed, and anything that has to do with a telephone. I hate phones with a passion.


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