How do I get a life?
 

I'm 29 years old, and after 2 years of marriage, I'm finding myself alone again. In the past, I've always used personals, and they've worked okay. Otherwise, everyone I've dated I've met usually through work (which I swore I would never do again). Years ago, I also used to meet women on the local BBSs and in chatrooms. That was nice, because you got to know people without actually seeing them.

However, I'd like to do something different. I want to find someone who is into the same things that I'm into, but not have to put ads out to find that person. Everyone tells me to go to church, find someone there. Well... I'm not the church type, nor am I sure I'll find the woman who is most like myself there.

So, what do I do? Any advice? Where does a geek guy go to find a geek godess?

Thanks!

I've always been under the impression that geek goddesses are in short supply, it's a case of too many geeks going after too few women.

I suggest hookers, at least for short-term relief.

I guess that's true. Just really miss the days when I knew quite a few girls who played FPSs, built systems, and enjoyed the same things as I did. Met most of them over the computer, but that was the days when pretty much anyone on the computer was a geek. Ah well.

However, you are correct... Hookers MIGHT be a good alternative. Wonder if I can get them to play a game of UT or two? :)

I think Asia Carrere (porn star) is a big FPS fan.

If only I had any chance in hell... (insert wishful thinking).

http://www.drue.com/writings/

Doesn't tell us where to meet them though.

Good article. You're right though. Nothing about where to find this ever elusive species. Thinkin about investing in a notebook, and just hanging out at a coffee shop with WiFi, maybe see what can turn up there. :)

Not a bad idea, I used to hang out at a Barnes&Noble with a WiFi. One of the barristas (that's what they call themselves, I think) there was a real hottie.....

Anyway, it didn't really work for me. But I did spend a lot of money on coffee for a while.

Barista is the correct title- I only know because I am one. Heh. Good thing I get free drinks. Ha.

The geek chicks are out there. I married one myself. We're both geeky in our own little world. Seriously, try and do the things that you like to do best, hit the LAN parties, hangout at bookstores, etc. Don’t search so hard for love. Maybe it'll com knocking on your door.

At least, that's what happened to me.

Definately good advice HardKnock. Actually, just built me a new computer this weekend so that I COULD go to LanParties. My last system was pretty abysmal. Need to see if anyone is hosting one in this area.

Bookstores have definately been something I used to do, but had to cut out being I was with a non-geek for so long. Will definately start that up again.

Maybe you can just BUILD a geek goddess.

Geek is more than just an interest in a particular technology. Geek is a state of mind, an attitude toward learning and technology. Broaden your search to women who have that state of mind, even if they're not particularly computer-centric. They might want to learn to be, if you interest them.

What do non-computer-geek geek girls do? For one thing -- they knit! My wife is both a regular geek (taught herself perl in her spare time) and a knitter, and she says that knitting is, really, basic engineering. Knitters do a lot of design calculations in their heads, they even create algorithms (plans for particular repeating patterns). There's even hardware; my wife has a massive two-bed knitting machine in the garage; it takes punch cards to do patterns automatically. She punches her patterns into them by hand.

Knitting is incredibly popular right now with women, and a lot of women in their 20s are learning. There are classes everywhere, and the knitting stores are jammed. I've tagged along with my wife and looked around; yep, you can tell that some of them are real geeks, by that look in their eye. There are even regular drop-in knitting groups in coffee houses with names like "Stitch n' Bitch." So, while you shouldn't take a knitting class unless you're really interested, I guarantee you'd meet a lot of women, and some of them would be of a very compatible mindset.

Along with knitters, I might also suggest looking at women who practice some of the more technically complex arts and crafts. Not painters so much, but serious ceramicists who are into glazing and serious kiln tricks. Or metalworkers or jewelry makers who cast their own stuff. I've met women in these fields: serious geek material, and often pretty hot, too!

P.S.

Your post title reminds me of an annoying but true saying: "It's hard to get a woman in your life if you don't have a life to put her in." As others have said, concentrate on leading a satisfying life and a partner will come along.

It just happens, I really don't know what to say but make sure you keep your eyes open and don't let chances pass you by. Take 'em cause they may turn out to work out very well.

If you don't search, it won't happen. That's the cold hard truth nobody tells you.

just get out there man! stop sitting at home, find some friends and go out to clubs/parties, wherever and just start talking to girls. even if the person youre talking to ends up being a complete opposite of what you want she probably has friends you can get to know.

Get out there! If you want to meet like-minded people, go to the places you'd normally go to pursue your own interests. If there are girls interested in the same things as you, law of averages says they'll be there too over time.

If you want to make a visual impression, dress the part. If you are looking for a geek goddess, be sure to roll in geek chic clothes. That doesn't mean ditch your whole wardrobe, but a few new hip shirts, shoes, coat, decent watch, & a new haircut are not bad places to start. Be sure to evaluate your glasses too if you wear them. Maxim, Complex & Cargo aren't bad to peruse to get ideas either. If you are going to shop in a trendy store, don't be afraid to ask for advice.

And most of all, be comfortable with being single! It takes repetition to get your game up to speed.

soundmotor

Well you can go out and socialize without the express purpose of romantic attachment, and you can meet girls that way wherein it may become a romantic attachment later (and no, I'm not talking about doing what Ross from Friends did. I mean after a few days not years).

FRIENDSTER.COM

plenty of geeks there :P