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Telethon 11-04-2003 10:10 PM

Personality
 
Hi, I was wondering..does personality change over time? I remember when I was younger I was outgoing and always had things to say and people laughed at my jokes and stuff but now I feel like I'm so dull and I usually have no comment or anything..I just go with the generic questions such as "oh cool and how did you feel" and stuff like that...Does anyone feel like they're just really boring?

rogue49 11-04-2003 10:38 PM

Very much so...however, I've found that you usually get to know yourself around your later 20's, early 30's.

But even after that...you're still changing.

anti fishstick 11-05-2003 01:12 AM

absolutely.
the only constant in life is change.
you will do it until you die.
and even then, you're probably still changing. but that's a whole new topic entirely :D

we are not the sum of our past experiences. this is not who you are today. but rather, what made you who you are.

perth1 11-05-2003 03:59 AM

i didnt come out of my shell until i left my long term girlfriend, that was about 24.

it was weird, i thought i was dull, unattractive and a bit of a social leper. as soon as i got a bit of confidence, that all changed. i'm happy being the way i am now!

the more you stress about it the worse it gets. just be yourself and everything will be cool.

Anti fishstick, you nailed it right on the head with this comment:
"we are not the sum of our past experiences. this is not who you are today. but rather, what made you who you are."

so true....

Gangsta 11-05-2003 04:49 AM

cool thread

skysooner 11-05-2003 06:49 AM

Definitely it changes. It took me years to come out of my shell (and I still don't feel completely comfortable in social situations), but I'm a hell of a lot more confident now. I still have many of the same values I did when I was in high school, but I'm much more tolerant of differences today.

Dano069 11-05-2003 08:11 AM

I'd say yes, but, it depends on the social climate you're in. I was also outgoing when I was younger. Now, I'm pretty damn shy. Don't know why, but it just happened. However, once I get to know people, I'll revert back to my nutty side.

la petite moi 11-05-2003 10:52 AM

oh man, i know exactly what you mean. yeah, it just seems like i've gotten more stupid over time. back in primary school i was so smart and got good grades and won awards. now, i can just barely maintain a 3.6- 3.8 gpa and i dont do anything extracurricular. oh well.

also, my emotions run wild and i can't control whether i get happy or sad or overly excited. i'm just figuring i'm biploar since depression runs in my family. but yeah, my personality has changed majorly too...

Sleepyjack 11-05-2003 11:08 AM

i used to be a little shy, but now i am not so much anymore. Also i've become much more open minded since leaving high school and especially over the last year or so.
I'd like to think it's change for the better, but i'll leave that to retrospect for now.

JimmyTheHutt 11-05-2003 12:27 PM

Change is definite. You can't help it, as it is part and parcel of being a living organism.

I used to be a fairly overt psychotic. Some of that is still there, but I've calmed down a lot as I've gotten older. I'm still a nerd though....

Veritas en Lux!
Jimmy The Hutt

tecoyah 11-05-2003 08:57 PM

Interesting thread, was wondering if personality is entirely a social trait....seems to me the inner dialogue changes as well, and may even be of more importance to the individual in the long run. Guess you would have to ask yourself if you are changing because of those around you, or for them.

gremlinx8 11-05-2003 09:29 PM

I've been a fairly shy person all of my life, but I've found that as I've gone on, I've opened up a bit more. I don't find it as difficult to talk to people I don't know. I'm still really quiet and shy, but I'm becoming more open and talkative.

Sledge 11-05-2003 09:39 PM

Here's the APA's take on personality change:
http://psychology.about.com/gi/dynam...rsonality.html

spived2 11-05-2003 09:40 PM

It took me until I joined the Army to finally break out of my shell. All my friends love to party all the time so I go with them. Doesn't take much time when you do it that way. Now I'm a lot more outgoing and don't have much problem at all talking to the opposite sex, unlike before when I could barely look 'em in the eye without tripping over myself.

Sledge 11-05-2003 09:40 PM

Text in above link:

Quote:

PERSONALITY IS NOT SET BY 30; IT CAN CHANGE THROUGHOUT LIFE, SAY RESEARCHERS
As We Get Older, We Care More About Work and People We Know; Women Become More Emotionally Stable and Self-Assured


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

WASHINGTON - Do peoples' personalities change after 30? They can, according to researchers who examined 132,515 adults age 21-60 on the personality traits known as the "Big Five": conscientiousness, agreeableness, neuroticism, openness and extraversion. These findings are reported in the May issue of the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, published by the American Psychological Association (APA).

From this large sample of volunteers recruited and examined over the Internet, lead researchers Sanjay Srivastava, Ph.D., and Oliver P. John, Ph.D., working at the University of California at Berkeley, found that certain changes do occur in middle adulthood. Conscientiousness increased throughout the age range studied, with the biggest increases in a person's 20s; this trait is defined as being organized, planful, and disciplined, and past research has linked it to work performance and work commitments. Agreeableness increased the most during a person's 30s; this trait is defined as being warm, generous, and helpful, and has been linked to relationships and to prosocial behavior. Neuroticism declined with age for women but did not decline for men; this trait is defined in people who worry and are emotionally unstable. It has been linked to depression and other mental health problems. Openness showed small declines with age for both men and women. Finally, extraversion declined for women but did not show changes in men.

Both neuroticism and extraversion scores were higher for younger women than for younger men. But for both of these traits - and most strikingly for neuroticism - the apparent sex differences diminished with age.

Of the 132,515 participants, 54 percent were female, all lived in the U.S. or Canada, 86% were White and 14% were Asian, Black, Latino or Middle Eastern. A subset of the sample - 42,578 - were asked about their socioeconomic status. Of these participants, 405 (1%) said they were poor, 7,614 (18%) said they were working class, 23,024 (54%) said they were middle class and 10,718 (25%) said they were upper-middle class.

This study contradicts an often cited view that personality traits are genetically programmed to stop changing by early adulthood. There is considerable evidence against it, say the authors. In the study, "average levels of personality traits changed gradually but systematically throughout the lifespan, sometimes even more after age 30 than before. Increasing conscientiousness and agreeableness and decreasing neuroticism in adulthood may indicate increasing maturity - people becoming on the average better adapted as they get older, well into middle age."

Sledge 11-05-2003 09:50 PM

Oh, and the Big Five is a popular model used to describe personality. Each of the five encompasses a range of more specific traits (for instance, Conscientiousness encompasses neatness). Within any one of the Big Five, all specific traits are highly correlated with each other; no two of the Big Five are supposed to be correlated, although that isn't entirely true in practice.

A highly conscientious person is strong-willed, can control her impulses, determined, and likely to achieve highly. May also be high-strung, workaholic, or compulsively neat.

High agreeableness indicates willingness to help others, to understand others, to sympathize, to be warm and generous. May also denote being a doormat.

Extraversion speaks for itself, pretty much. Extraverts are energetic, feel at home in social situations, are more likely to lead and make decisions, may tend to be dominant.

Neuroticism is interesting. People with high neuroticism tend to be irritable, compulsive, depressed, usually blame themselves, and are pessimists.

The hardest to explain is openness, but it's a VERY interesting idea. Those who are open to new experiences score high on creativity, aesthetics, play with ideas and ideals, are original and enthusiastic. They run the risk of being airheaded or disconnected from others.

Hope this clears up some of the terminology in the article. As you can see, some things are more likely to change than others.

Telethon 11-05-2003 09:55 PM

Heh...Very cool...Seems kind of strange to me, I went from outgoing cool guy making jokes and being witty to being a really quiet, can't ever think of stuff to say, not funny or very witty and basically boring

empu 11-05-2003 10:18 PM

Being outgoing or shy is often a product of the dynamic among the people you hang around as well. Different people bring out different sides of you.

KnifeMissile 11-05-2003 11:28 PM

Speaking of changing personalities, does anyone else here see themselves thinking and feeling the same way adults did when they were younger?

I was such a rebel when I was a teen and hated everything I disagreed with and worked hard to change the world.
Now, I find the world isn't so bad and and accept that other people think and feel differently than myself.

What the hell happened? Did I "grow up?"

Telethon 11-07-2003 08:25 AM

Yup, you probably did

Jesus Pimp 11-07-2003 10:26 AM

How come girls always say you'll never change but you change anyway? Makes no sense.

Dano069 11-07-2003 10:27 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by KnifeMissle
Speaking of changing personalities, does anyone else here see themselves thinking and feeling the same way adults did when they were younger?

I was such a rebel when I was a teen and hated everything I disagreed with and worked hard to change the world.
Now, I find the world isn't so bad and and accept that other people think and feel differently than myself.

What the hell happened? Did I "grow up?"

Same here. It's a hell of a lot easier to judge folks when you're not under the same pressures that they are. Jobs, homelife, bosses, etc. take their toll on adults. When you're a teenager, life is pretty sweet, although none of us knew it then, did we?

What did our parents used to tell us (and I'm now telling MY kids?)

"Enjoy it, you're having the time of your life. You just don't know it."

tikki 11-08-2003 06:40 PM

Personality definitely changes. I didn't use to be this cynical and melancholy.

To me, personality is just a product of your surroundings and situations. Life = good, personality = happy, go lucky. Life = not so good, personality = mine :)

Oopsfix 11-09-2003 11:53 AM

heh yeah i guess


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