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I have seriously considered it many times. Most of them I was talked out of it by a true friend. One time a friend walked in during my consideration of it and made me promise her to find a way to make it until the next day. It made me realize what I was considering and that I needed help. Later on when I couldn't find the help I wanted, I conisered it again, and was determined to do it, but was talked out of it before I had finished prepairing for it. After that I found a bit of help, and have been slowly getting better. I won't go into any more detail due to the ignorance some people here have shown towards this matter. Considering suicide doesn't make you an idiot. Thinking that someone is an idiot for considering suicide is pure ignorance. To those of you who assume that someone is an idiot for considering/attempting suicide, I guess there are some things that you just wouldn't understand until you've been there. Also, sometimes those who are suffering and considering it are not those who you would expect it from. Some people are good at hiding things like that from everyone except a select few. Quote:
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No, I've thought about it ideally a few times, but never really seriously - as sad and strange as my life seems it always seemed worth it enough to me I guess
Dead Like Me is a great show though. |
yeah, i feel like me=shit alot. not enough to become addicted, but i am a depressed person on the inside. i guess i hide it really well. i've only seriously attempted killing myself a coupla times, but someone stopped me. i've had many friends who are constantly threatening to commit suicide, and they never go through with it, so i guess if i were ever going to try it again, i'd go out with a bang like jumping out of a plane without a parachute or something. (because you die for sure that way)
i guess humans are alot more alike than they think.... anyway, no worries of me dying anytime soon...(at least not of my own volition) btw crazy/beautiful i love that song |
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I've thought about how I'd do it just in case I one day really decide to.
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I really Love your band aid quote that completely explains it. I hope you'll allow me to use it, I'll credit it to you |
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You're extremely introspective about this. As much as I don't want to admit it. I do romatize the idea of suicide at times, which in general prevents me from ever giving it up as an option. Also it is sometimes hard for me to identify myself without the depression. Like having depression is a defining characteristic for me. I've had it for so long, it's like I don't know how to respond without thoughts of cutting cutting or suicide, when I become upset or sad. I was wondering if you had any advice on how to work through this? You're also right, about people sharing stories of suicide and seeming to take a sick pride in them. I can't really benefit from group therapy due to the fact the everyone tries to out do one another. No one wants to be told that their pain isn't as bad as someone else's when their hurting. No one wants to have their feelings marginalized. People want to prove that they are hurting and sometimes that is the easiest way for them to do it. Like AA's compare horror stories. Of course this type of venting experiences around others with thoughts of suicide can influence emotional sensitive people that they need to take action to be taken seriously. I have changed drastically in who I tell my stories to. Anyone who had a sob story I would relate my own to them. The last time I was in a hospital a young girl who was also there for attempted suicide actually told me how many times in various ways she had tried to kill herself, after I told her I was there for attempting suicide when she asked. She had actually kept count. I just listened to her quietly and said that I wasn't very proud of my suicide attempts and left it at that. I think the reason for this, is the in our society mental illness is sometimes viewed with a stigma. Also it is hard to prove you actually have a mental illness to others until something bad happens. Unfortunately people in society are too ignorant to relize that suicide is usually an implusive behavior and you can live with crippling depression without attempting suicide. I feel bad that many people with depression get discarded by not appearing to other to "be serious" about it. Just because someone does or doesn't try to commit suicide should not be a factor in the amount of pain their in. People who use the threat of suicide as a manipulation tool, have minimized the importance and severity of the word or thought of suicide. |
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