If I'm Straight, How Do I Politely Reject A Gay Guy?
 

What's the best way to politely reject a gay guy?

The same way you'd reject a girl you're not interested in.

Perhaps it would be better if you gave us some context, as straight guys are prone to presume they're being hit on, but generally you just say, "Sorry, I'm straight."

I would have to agree with Snowy here and just spit it out and let him know it isn't your cup of tea.

With a blowjob.

No hard feelings, ya know.

You're only saying that because you want me.

Well, ya know.. you are a banana.

Alright here's some more info and how I handled the situation.

I was going to a gay bar with some friends of mine and I was traveling alone that night. I got into the city before the rest of my group so I decided to grab a drink at another bar. It was pretty quiet there and I was just chatting with the bartender who happened to be gay (i later found out). I told him i was going to a gay club that night with my friends and I think that's what made him think I was gay. Also, I could definitely pull off being gay based on the way I look and dress which I imagine contributed to him thinking im gay.

I paid with my credit card before leaving which is how i think he got my name. The next day I got a message from him on myspace that seemed flirtatious in nature. I don't want to seem big headed, but I really don't know why a bartender would find me on myspace and make contact unless he was interested, right?

Anyway, the way I fixed the situation was to do so in a subtle way. I messaged back telling him that i had a good time with my friends (in the message he asked how my night was) and that it's crazy how a straight guy like me could have so much fun at a gay bar. I hope he gets the hint. If not, I'll be more direct.

Tell him you hooked up with an awesome girl and you put your penis in her vagina...

In casual conversation, of course...

No reach-around.

Get a really intimidating pair of spike-studded leather briefs. That should scare him off.

"Hey, Will, you want to go get some coffee some time?"
"I'm flattered, but I'm not gay. Let me introduce you to my friend World's King..."\

If you're sincere when you say you're flattered, I'm sure it will help.

I would think that would solve your problem. I have a large gay community around me, I have many gay friends. In my experience a lot of gay men can be pretty damn forward. More forward then I would be with a lady. I've found, at times, mentioning my ex wife works. If not a simple mention the hot chick you ran into earlier works well.

I suck one dick in a truck stop bathroom and all of a sudden I'm gay? Fuck that.

It sounds as if you handled the situation rather well.

So that was you?

My god. That's been my tagline so long, it actually took me a minute to figure out what you meant....

You know how I know you're gay? You listen to coldplay.
(40 Year Old Virgin anyone? Heh heh.)

Katyanna: thanks.
Tully Mars: I'll try some of that if I ever get into that situation again

"Don't be so suburban. There's no 'gay' anymore. If taking a shot in the mouth is going to move me down the road, I'll do it."

Kevin Smith is a genius at times. A complete fucknut at others, but he hits the nail on the head when he gets close.

Soma, you could also find the biggest guy in the room and say that you're with him. If that's who you're talking to, mention pubic lice and cough a lot.

Here's how I did it:

"Wow, I really appreciate that, and if I were gay, I would totally take you up on it, because you're a really good-looking guy. But I'm afraid I'm straight. Sorry."

Also, I should say, I once spent a summer a long time ago working near the beach in Santa Monica, and I got hit on SO many times! Apparently, gay blond surfers have a real thing for big hairy Jews.... I did the polite rejection thing so much...and none of the girls I hit on ever were interested. Once, this dude hit on me, and I said, "Listen, I'm really flattered, and you're clearly hot, but I'm not gay. Whatever it is you see in me, could you maybe go over and point it out to that redheaded girl over there?"

Buy a shirt that says... 'I like to put my penis in vaginas." and make sure there's a diagram below.

Make sure to wear it every day and whenever someone you don't know talks to you make sure to use the line - "Just so there's no awkward notions - you know I'm not gay, right?" Then motion to your shirt.

Problem solved.

You could always go the Stephen Lynch route:

If I were Gay

Here we are
Dear old friends
You and I drunk again
laughs have been had
tears have been shed
maybe the whiskey has gone to my head
but if I were gay
I would give you my heart
and if I were gay
you'd be my work of art
and if i were gay
we would swim in romance
but I'm not gay
so get your hand out of my pants

It's not that I don't care
I do
I just don't see myself in you
another time another scene
I'd be right behind you if you know what i mean
coz if I were gay
I would give soul
and if I were gay
I would give you my whole... being
and if I were gay
we would tear down the walls
But I'm Not gay
so wont you stop cupping my Ba... Hand


we've never hugged
we've never kissed
I've never been intimate with your fist
you have opened brand new doors
get over here and drop ... your ... Drawers

Awesome answer! Where did you get your shirt? ;)