Yeah, so, I'm going to be a dad
 

Life has just taken a hell of a turn. Been seeing this very lovely girl for a while now, and on, of all days, Friday the 13th, I get informed she is pregnant. Needless to say, this was a bit of a shock. And this was with 2 forms of birth control in place. We were keeping a lid on things while she decided which way it was going to go. Well, we're keeping it. The bitter bastard is about to have a bastard of his own. :D I am, in the end, excited about this. When I'm not in the middle of a "oh my fucking god I'm going to be a dad" freak out. I always planned on having kids someday, just wasn't expecting it to be this someday. We had our first doctors appointment on the 30th. Kids isn't even out of the womb and it's already fucking with me. While I had stepped out of the room to use the bathroom real quick the listened for the heart beat. Picked it up real quick. When I came back in the kid moved and they couldn't find it again. I get the feeling this is just a nice foreshadowing of the next 18 or so years. I swear, I don't think I've ever been so excited and scared shitless all at the same time before.

Congratulations.

Take some time to think about what kind of father you want to be. There are plenty of Tilted fathers who I'm sure would be more than willing to share what we've learned from experience.

Congrats, my friend.

Children are a gift, and from how excited you are, I know you'll treasure yours. I'll be calling on you for advice in four or so years, so take notes. :)

As Willravel said, think about the kind of father you want to be, as well as the kind of adult youd like to see your child become. Raising a Citizen of the World can occasionally be challenging, mostly though its a blast! It will take over your world.

How lucky are you!? You are about to fall in love.

Guess you can toss that avatar....wouldn't want your kid to go to therapy over that!! :D
Congrats. Having kids is very scary and being scared can be a good thing and it's much better than being indifferent.
What I would say to anyone becoming a parent is:
Be a part of the pregnancy.
Let your kid be a kid, in all phases of his or her childhood.
Be the parent, but let your long-lost child emerge to once again see the world through your offspring's eyes.
Don't lose your humanity. Humans make mistakes and every parent makes them. But when we don't admit them and don't allow our kids to see us as human beings, we lose their respect.
Relax and go with your gut.

Congrats. It's ok to be scared shitless. Know I was. I was actually in Japan when my daughter was born in Salem, Oregon. My ship headed out on a six month "WestPac" and she was born four months after we left. The first time I met her she was nearly 6mos. old. I drove all night once I got leave to see her. I walk in the house at around 7am and my wife handed her to me. I nearly went into shock. I was very happy but for some reason it really hit me... "Now what? Now, now I'm completely responsible for another human being? Gez, I'm barely able to be responsible for myself."

Once I relaxed a little it pretty much all fell into place. Though I must admit to second guessing many of my second guesses.

I'm very happy with the person she is today. She'll be 22 at the end of this month.

Congratulations! I would impart advice, but really. Enjoy this moment.

Pregnancy happens fast. Find a good hospital and go to the classes. My wife is now 38 weeks pregnant, and it seems like we were just looking at that little blue + yesterday.

My biggest advice: take care of yourself too. I gained 25lbs because of the periods where I had to eat junk food since the house couldn't smell like cooking :(

Congrats! The good news is that you still have nearly nine months to contemplate both your future and that of your child. You should be both excited and scared shitless. 'Nuff said.

The elusive fetus will surely show him/herself by the next when it's ultrasound time!

Well, our next doctors appointment is on the 30th. It will still be to soon for an ultrasound I think, but hopefully I'll get to hear the heart beat this time. Note to self, take a leak before the appointment next time. As for what kind of father i want to be, I had a pretty good roll model for that one growing up, so I think I have an idea or two. Speaking of, just broke the news to the family a couple night ago. I think they may have been the most fun I could have with this. Got my dad a worlds greatest grandfather tee shirt and let him figure it out from there. So of course, he was wearing it when my mom came home. Once she go around to reading it got a "woohoo" and a happy dance out of her right then and there. The dance repeated itself a few times that night. This kid is going to be spoiled rotten by those two.

Congrats! Good luck man!

Start studying the "Things you can't stand about children" thread so you don't get run out of TFP by the angry mob. But seriously, you'll do just fine.

Congrats and I hope everything goes perfectly for you.

With support like that you'll do great as a father.

Get ready for an adventure.

What a great way of breaking the news to your family!

When you hear about someone who uses two forms of birth control and still gets pregnant, it all comes down to one of two things. No, you weren't careless. If you ovulate twice a month, or release multiple eggs with each ovulation, hormone-based birth control methods such as the pill, ring, patch, shot, etc won't work. They're designed to catch one ovulation. If you naturally superovulate, you're screwed.

Hey Congrats seer. Best of luck - I didn't know you were even near to being in the family way...goes to show what I know around these parts.

Seer - awesome news. Thanks for sharing.

Seer,

you're gong to have a signature just like Jazz's in 9 months time!

oh congrats btw!

That is awesome.

It's good that you guys have got this kind of support behind you.

So, for those of you that are already parents here, how long did it take for you to stop having massive freak outs? Some days the gravity of this just hits me hard. I swear I think I need medication or something.

It is amazing, just became a father here, and it is just awesome, cherish every little thing.

Relax, breathe. The simply fact that you're concerned about this probably means you're going to be a great dad. It's natural to be stressed. But trust me many people have this before you and are most of them are certainly not as bright as you seem to be, you'll be fine.

thanks for the vote of confidence. It's hard as hell not to stress to much though. maybe I should take up yoga or something. Been a hairs breath away from killing one of my coworkers all day. Of course, I end up wanting to kill this guy at least once a week. This last week has been trying though.

Yoga works! I have taken it up recently and it's awesome. I'm sure you will be a great dad. Start reading and soaking up all that good parenting information before the little tyke arrives. Congrats! *hugs*

You don't work for the government do you?

Regardless, co-workers can make or break a job for me. I had a better time flipping burgers at Wendy's and cleaning toilets in the Navy then I did at my last assignment with the State of Oregon. Was there for five years, five of the longest years of my life. Mainly because of one co-worker, though she had two friends (least they thought they were friends, the shit she said about them when they were gone... gez, don't even get me started.) The group of them made everyone else's life miserable, IMHO. Prior to that I worked out of another courthouse where everybody clicked. Worked there nearly three times as long, those years flew by.

Plummie's probably right about the yoga. I've never done it. But I think any type of exercise helps with stress. If nothing else get a heavy bag, some gloves and beat the crap of it a few times a week.

Not anymore Tully. Used to be navy, but got out. First tour was pretty awesome. Second one burned my out from working for to many shit bags. I know just what you mean about people co-workers making or breaking a job. I swear I just can't get a break thought. My main form of stress reliese these days is COD4. Nothing like shooting a few people to make you feel better. Well, my xbox just became a rexbox. fucking red ringed on me. Sigh.

Yoga does work. I use it to control my stress/anxiety problems and I can't recommend it highly enough. It's not only destressing in and of itself, but it teaches mindfulness, which is very helpful in other situations (like work). Exercise also works wonders--riding my bike is helpful, so is hitting a tennis ball, and kicking a soccer ball. Physical activity helps you unwind and it releases happy happy endorphins. Yay.

And congratulations.

Yeah what snowy said with the qualifier that I still don't know jack about yoga. I also don't know what COD4 is, sounds like video game? I have an Xbox, my kid bought it for me for Christmas. I'd never tell her this but I use it solely for watching region 1 DVD's. You might try doing some actual physical to get out that stress, though I highly advise against shooting people.

Navy here too, out in 87' as an HT2 after four years. I might have been a lifer but my daughter, as I said, was born in Oregon while I sat in Yokosuka, Kanagawa, Japan (I may have even spelled that wright, or is it right?) On a ship of nearly 1300 people when the Dr. called I was the one to answer the phone. I hear a guy on the other end of the phone "I'm trying to locate a Petty Officer Mars." "That's me." "No, I'm looking for a PO Tully Mars." "You're speaking with him." "From Salem, Oregon?" "Yes, yes- what the hell do you want?" Of course he used my real name, but it was an odd conversation, with a happy ending. About three hours later, in berthing, the chaplain showed up to give me the good news. I had to go topside and show him it was my signature in the ships log detailing the call before he believed me.

I was in Yokosuka as well. I was a CTR when I was in. Loved being in Japan. It was being in Hawaii that killed my staying in the navy. Never go there if you can help it. And COD4 is a game. Call of Duty 4. Lot's of fun. I spend all day busting my ass in a warehouse right now, so I get's lots of physical activity. Hence why I like gaming to unwind. Low key, and half the time I don't have much energy for more when I get home.
That is hiliarious about you being the one to get the call. Given the number of people I'm guessing you were on the carrier over there. Was it the Indie that was there before the Kitty Hawk?

Crypto guy, makes sense.

That's funny I have Call Of Duty 3, obviously don't play it came with the box.

No not a bird farm. I really think CVN's have more people then 1300. I was on a AD- Destroyer Tender. Repair ship, we spent months in Yokosuka working on the Kitty Hawk- AKA the "Shitty Kitty." That was the one WestPac I was on we didn't hit 10+ ports. That was the nice thing about my ship, our job couldn't be done at sea. So we bee lined it from one port to the next. Fours years and the longest time at sea was 23 days- Diego Garica to Indonesia. On that float the only movie we left Diego with was "The Man From Snowy River." After a little over a week of it playing nightly on the mess deck they assigned different roles to folks and the crew provided the words, line by line. I had Kirk Douglas' part for a couple nights. When I got home my parents had my wife and I over, they rented that video. I told my wife I've seen it. But I sat and watched all while thinking "God I'm sick of this freaking movie!" I told them I'd return the video. When I got home I put it in the VCR, turn off the sound and showed my wife "see I've not only seen it, I can repeat every freaking word."

The CV's have up to 5000 when the air wing is on them. About half that without. When I was over there though, all the other ships were small boys, so the kitty was the only one with that many or more is why I thought it may have been the carrier. Had pretty much the same thing happen to me movie wise, only it was Scary Movie for me. I still can't watch that damn movie. Every god damn day for 2 months.

Me be a dad for the first time come November, but this was all planned, no surprises here.

So far, I've found this to be a good time to examine my character and decide what kind of adult I plan to be. I'm plotting out every possible mistake, knowing full well that they will still be made.

We don't come to this young, we're both 40 (born on the same day!).

There is a disturbing lack of Transformers baby stuff out there.

So, I guess this will be a question for the mods. WOuld an ultrasounds fall under the same ruling as pictures of kids? Be a little while before we get one, but wondering about that one for sharing.

An ultrasound is NOT a picture of a kid. You need to be born to be a child. Before then, you're a parasite.

Seriously, an ultrasound is generally not recognizable as a child, so go ahead. I will say that you should be prepared for some to tell you that it's more appropriate as a blog entry, but that's your problem, not mine.

OMFG. We are at the hospital and I just got to hear the little shits heart beat. that is so amazing and cool.

OH MY FUCKING GOD! I am so happy for you! Glad to know the parasite lives and beats.

Youre gonna have a rockin good time as a dad.

The last message just made me smile.

I'm glad you're excited dude, congrats.

We heard the heartbeat about four weeks ago. We heard it again last Firday, and saw an outline of the body. it is now viable outside the womb. The more I hear and see, the more it seems real.

Due 11/20/08. This will be the only Autumn baby in the fam.

Congrats, Seer!!!

And I just wanted to say that it makes me smile to see so many excited dads here... :) It's awesome to see how you all feel/felt before the baby was born, since women tend to only hear about other women's stories of pregnancy, delivery, etc. It's great to hear from the other side, what you're going through. :thumbsup:

Autumn babies are fine Poppinjay. Mary was born on the first day of Fall and her birthday parties often took place in an orchard picking apples and then going home to make crisp (and everone took home their apples). Picking apples with a bunch of kids and then baking and eating with them is riotous. They were really so fun that Mary and her friends continued the tradition in high school and now as adults.

You have wonderful times ahead.