iccky

So I'm exchanging emails with people who might give me an internship this summer (about interview times etc.) and I'm wondering when in the chain of emails its ok to refer to them by their first name i.e.

Dear Jane,

instead of:

Dear Ms. Jones,

They generaly start writing "Dear Charles," instead of "Dear Mr. Myers," after one or two emails, but I'm not sure if that's appropriate for me to do as well.

Any advice? Soon hopefully since I need to respond to this email soon.

onetime2

Whether it's appropriate or not, I generally do it after the initial contact. e.g., if I am first inquiring about the position it is formal, once I get a response back from them I use their first name. It sometimes depends on the tone though. If they seem more formal (even if they begin using my first name) I will continue to address them formally.

What kind of internships are you looking for?

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iccky

Thanks for the advice.

I'm a political science major, so internships with campaign firms and organizations (polling firms, Democratic National Committee, stuff like that).

onetime2

Well, can't help much with that I'm in pharmaceuticals.

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Bill O'Rights

As a general rule, you're never going to go wrong by addressing someone formally. I would continue to do so, no matter how many times they address you by your first name. Unless, of course, they tell you otherwise. It shows a level of respect, and could possibly set you just one notch higher than the guy that's got the exact same qualifications as you.

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onetime2

Or it could come across as too kiss assish.

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nukeu666

dont use 1st names till u have met the person in person...
to be properly formal....cutout the 'dear' alsop

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Mephisto2

I couldn't agree with this more.

Of course, once you GET the job/internship then you can move onto firstname basis. But in initial discussions you should always be polite and formal.

Mr Mephisto

Mephisto2

I disagree. Since when is being respectful "kiss assish"? Once they say "Call me John", then you're fine.

Put another way... you're going to a second or third interview. Do YOU decide to turn up in jeans and a t-shirt because you feel the need for formality is gone?

Sheesh...

:-)


Mr Mephisto

Giltwist

This is a good point. According to MLA format, here are some appropropriate beginnings to a formal letter. Note how you use a colon instead of a comma.

Sirs and Madams:
To whom it may concern:
(Titles like Dr., Rev., Mr., etc., followed by the last name):

JohnnyRoyale

Agreeing with some of the above, unless you're specifically given release to address someone informally ("just call me so-and-so"), stick to the formal. It implies respect to the people your adressing, and implies a professionalism in your tone that will ultimately improve your relationship with whomever your conversing with.

As for the fact that it's e-mail, it's OK in that respect to forgoe the usual memorandum and letter headings (return address, for example), and start simply with the recipient's formal title (Dr, Mr. or Mrs.).

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onetime2

Yes, addressing someone by their given name is akin to dressing the opposite of all tradition.

If you are trading constant emails or messages with another and continually throw in "Mr Smith" it can seem kiss assish. But hey, to each his own. It's not something that I would do and I don't know of a single person that I've come across in my professional career who would feel disrespected or put off by a potential employee calling them by their first name beyond the first contact.

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phukraut

if they have signed their own emails with Jane or whatever, then i say use Jane in future correspondence.

tekaweni

Agreed - take your cue from how they sign themselves at the bottom of their emails. But until then theyre the ones offering the job and you should remain 'respectful'.

It's all about impressions, and you want to make a good one.

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Grothendieck

Thanks all. I passively learned something in this thread!

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