10 Husbands and still a virgin - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

maleficent · 12-08-2005, 08:53 AM

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."

"What?" said the puzzled groom.

"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.

Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"

"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

Charlatan · 12-08-2005, 09:02 AM

*rimshot*... Go Mal!

Brewmaniac · 12-08-2005, 09:18 AM

Very clever, I love lawyer jokes! I hate lawyers though. Thanks

rmarshall · 12-08-2005, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him!

I think I know what he did!

maleficent · 12-08-2005, 11:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rmarshall

I think I know what he did!

/me makes a mental note to find a stamp collector...

SirLance · 12-08-2005, 02:08 PM

Bada-bump! Good one!

12-08-2005, 08:53 AM	#1 (permalink)
maleficent Junkie Moderator Emeritus Location: Chicago	10 Husbands and still a virgin A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin." "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?" "Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be. Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me. Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up. Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver. Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method. Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not. Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it. Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it. Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it. Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!" "Good," said the new husband, "but, why?" "You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!" __________________ Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.

12-08-2005, 09:02 AM	#2 (permalink)
Charlatan Getting it. Super Moderator Location: Lion City	rimshot... Go Mal! __________________ "My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke

12-08-2005, 09:18 AM	#3 (permalink)
Brewmaniac Searching for the perfect brew!	Very clever, I love lawyer jokes! I hate lawyers though. Thanks __________________ "That's a joke... I say, that's a joke, son"

12-08-2005, 02:08 PM	#6 (permalink)
SirLance Junkie Location: In the middle of the desert.	Bada-bump! Good one! __________________ DEMOCRACY is where your vote counts, FEUDALISM is where your count votes.