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The following quotes were taken from actual insurance forms where car drivers were asked to summarize the details of an accident in as few words as possible.

1. Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.

2. The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.

3. I thoughty my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my head through it.

4. I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.

5. A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.

6. A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

7. The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

8. I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment.

9. In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

10. I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.

11. I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.

12. As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no sign had ever appeared before; I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.

13. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.

14. My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.

15. An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

16. I told the police that I was not injured, but upon removing my hair, I found that I had a fractured skull.

17. I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.

18. The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.

19. I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman and he bounced off the hood of my car.

20. The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

21. I was thrown from my car as it left the road; I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.

22. The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end.

These are sentences taken from actual letters received by the Welfare Department in application for support.

1. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and six children. I had seven but one died which we baptized on a half sheetl of paper.

2. I am writing the Welfare Department to say that my baby was born two years ago. When do I get my money?

3. Mrs. Jones has not had any clothes for a year and has been visited regularly by the clergy.

4. I cannot get sick pay. I have six children. Can you tell me why?

5. I am glad to report that my husband who is missing is dead.

6. This is my eighth child. What are your going to do about it?

7. I am very much annoted to find that you have branded my son illiterate. This is a dirty lie, as I was married a week before he was born.

8. In answer to your letter, I have given birth to a son weighting ten pounds. I hope this is satisfactory.

9. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and my three children; one of which is a mistake as you can see.

10. Unless I get my husband's money pretty soon, I will be forced to lead an immortal life.

11. You have changed my little boy to a girl. Will this make any difference?

12. In accordance with your instructions, I have given birth to twins in the enclosed envelope.

13. I want money as quickly as I can get it. I have been in bed with the doctor for two weeks and he doesn't do any good. If the things don't improve I will have to send for another doctor.

14. Please find for certain if my husband is dead. The I man I am now living with can't eat or do anything until he knows.

15. My husband got one of his projects cut off two weeks ago and I haven't had any relief since.