Make sure you mean what you say... - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

troit · 02-19-2005, 10:44 AM

Last Day on the Job

It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail
through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.

When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole
family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift
envelope.

At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.

The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in
a revealing negligee.

She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the
stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had
ever experienced.

When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant
breakfast, eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh squeezed
orange juice.

When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.

As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's
bottom edge. "All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the
dollar for?"

"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last
day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you."

He said, "Fuck him, give him a dollar."

The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."

mazagmot · 02-19-2005, 10:51 AM

aw man, that's awesome.

MacGyver · 02-19-2005, 12:33 PM

nice one. i saw something like that coming... but i wasn't expecting the breakfast punch line.

ranger · 02-22-2005, 09:00 AM

the obvious thing to ask would be if the woman was blond... but of course i am not that shallow...

Tolano · 02-22-2005, 04:02 PM

im so going to remember that one

Destrox · 02-25-2005, 06:20 AM

That was a nice joke that I shall tell more then once.

FatherTed · 02-25-2005, 06:21 AM

Great 1, thanks fot posting it

carrot glace · 02-26-2005, 01:05 AM

that sounds like a joke comic i saw, if i see it again ill post it here

basmoq · 02-26-2005, 06:02 AM

great, thanks!

mojodragon · 02-26-2005, 06:46 AM

wonder if the post office is hiring?

mordret · 03-04-2005, 04:48 AM

Funny one, thanks !

Brewmaniac · 03-04-2005, 05:14 AM

I read tons of joke and this one of the best lately. Thanks!

02-19-2005, 10:44 AM	#1 (permalink)
troit Transfer Agent Location: NYC	Make sure you mean what you say... Last Day on the Job It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope. At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures. At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced. When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast, eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge. "All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?" "Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you." He said, "Fuck him, give him a dollar." The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea." __________________ I've yet to dephile myself...

02-19-2005, 12:33 PM	#3 (permalink)
MacGyver Tilted Location: Wisconsin	nice one. i saw something like that coming... but i wasn't expecting the breakfast punch line. __________________ More is more and less is less, More is better and twice as much is good too. Not enough is bad, And too much is never enough unless it's just about right.

02-25-2005, 06:20 AM	#6 (permalink)
Destrox Metal and Rock 4 Life Location: Phoenix	That was a nice joke that I shall tell more then once. __________________ You bore me.... next.

02-25-2005, 06:21 AM	#7 (permalink)
FatherTed Crazy Location: Ireland	Great 1, thanks fot posting it __________________ Food, fun and frolicking - that's all I need

02-26-2005, 01:05 AM	#8 (permalink)
carrot glace Crazy Location: orange county	that sounds like a joke comic i saw, if i see it again ill post it here __________________ "blaine is a pain and that is the truth"

02-19-2005, 10:51 AM	#2 (permalink)
mazagmot Crazy Location: S. Korea	aw man, that's awesome.

02-22-2005, 09:00 AM	#4 (permalink)
ranger Crazy Location: antioch IL	the obvious thing to ask would be if the woman was blond... but of course i am not that shallow...

02-22-2005, 04:02 PM	#5 (permalink)
Tolano Upright	im so going to remember that one

02-26-2005, 06:02 AM	#9 (permalink)
basmoq It's a girly girl! Location: OH, USA	great, thanks! __________________ "There's someone out there for everyone - even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them."

02-26-2005, 06:46 AM	#10 (permalink)
mojodragon Darth Mojo Location: Right behind you...	wonder if the post office is hiring?

03-04-2005, 04:48 AM	#11 (permalink)
mordret Tilted Location: Metz, France	Funny one, thanks !

03-04-2005, 05:14 AM	#12 (permalink)
Brewmaniac Searching for the perfect brew!	I read tons of joke and this one of the best lately. Thanks! __________________ "That's a joke... I say, that's a joke, son"