Why, oh why English????
 

"Me not know English that's unposible"-Homer Simpson

There was a strong wind blowing today in the desert and I lost my watch which I had forgot to wind, but remembered that there was a shop which served dessert not for from the desert so I decided to desert the desert, and I wind up finding my watch uncovered by the upwardly wind and the later watch I will wind.

Does any one esle know any words like wind or desert?

Haha, well english may be a bitch, but at least it cuts down on the different spellings in some aspects. but makes up for it in other.........

wasn't that ralph saying "me fail english, that's unposible"

Yes. That's just plane inforgivable.

If you think english is bad, you should see the horrendous amount of homophones in languages like Chinese or Japanese. A word like Ma can mean 25 things, though thankfully it can be divided another 5 by "tone" so only 5 of each. Still, everything is context-based. Though I haven't gotten far enough into Chinese yet to fully grasp all the workings, I know that Japanese at least, which uses the Chinese alphabet/characters, has a ridiculous amount of meanings for words.
"Konnichi (wa)" for example, can also be read "Kyoo" (depending on context, so impossible to tell just by seeing it individually), or independently as many other things.

Within english... Isn't relay like that? In my mind, "I will relay the information" sounds different than "I will run in a relay race". Similar to a 'desert' and the action-form of 'desert' or 'deserting' or perhaps "read": I will read, I have read. red vs read.
It's an interesting thing to consider, for sure.

(just reading my post, I remembered "lead" is an obvious complement to the way "read" works)

"me fail english, that's unposible" HAHAHA ~ Ralph...

<a href="http://littlecalamity.tripod.com/Text/HateEnglish.html">This Page</a> is full of things just like that, including this poem about plurals:

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes;
but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;
yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,
and I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three would be those,
yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
and the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
but though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.

Speaking of mangled English....
The following is a poem made up entirely of actual quotes from George W. Bush.

The quotes have been arranged for aesthetic reasons only by Washington Post writer Richard Thompson.
<div align="center">MAKE THE PIE HIGHER
by George W. Bush

I think we all agree, the past is over.
This is still a dangerous world.
It's a world of madmen and uncertainty and potential mental losses.
Rarely is the question asked Is our children learning?
Will the highways of the internet become more few?
How many hands have I shaked?
They misunderestimate me.

I am a pitbull on the pantleg of opportunity.
I know that the human being and the fish can coexist.
Families is where our nation finds hope, where our wings take dream.
Put food on your family!
Knock down the tollbooth!
Vulcanize Society!

Make the pie higher! Make the pie higher!</div>

I must admit that after I read this thread that I thought "Damn, I am glad I can read ". :thumbsup:

Peace

Howdee :suave:

before my dad left he said the right way to read is to go from left to right. (it's better to say "correct" instead of the first instance, i know. few people do this)

Pools of people playing pool by the pool.

There is a page that has a lot of these, but my favorite is "The Chaos", I have heard it is impossible to read through the first time out loud without an error. Here's the link, it's to long to post: http://www.cupola.com/html/wordplay/chariva1.htm

Woh byesman

I've seen The Chaos before
Thankies for the link :) Will try to read it .. will try ..

Anyways, I took the last sentence to my heart "Give it up"

Here's one.

We will appropriate the funds to their appropriate projects.

i believe you are right i must have mistaked ralph for homer, however i do know this one had to be homer- " what do we need english for we're not going to england"