Politically Correctives... - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Hanxter · 07-30-2003, 08:27 AM

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT - 2003 VERSION

1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.
2. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
3. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
4. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION HIGHWAY.
5. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
6. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
7. She does not get DRUNK OR TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY
INCONVENIENCED.
8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
9. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
10. She is not a SL-T - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
11. She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PICTORIALLY SUPERIOR.
12. She is not a TWO-BIT WH0RE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.
2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He suffers from OPPOSING FOOT DISORDER.
3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - he has GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS.
6. He does not get FALLING DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.
8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG -He has SWINE EMPATHY.
9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.
10. He is not HORNY - He is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.
11. It is not his CRACK you see hanging out of his pants - It is REAR CLEAVAGE.

johnnymysto · 07-30-2003, 08:44 AM

still good ones!!!

PayUp · 07-30-2003, 04:12 PM

i like those lists. almost true in a way

Slims · 07-30-2003, 04:25 PM

Good job, that's hilarious
thanks

slant eyes · 07-30-2003, 08:29 PM

awesome rear cleavage

Quote:

11. It is not his CRACK you see hanging out of his pants - It is REAR CLEAVAGE.

what about the folds under the beer gut? that considered cleavage too? and man titties?

He does not have MAN TITTIES, he too has a set of breasts with which men should not fondle

--forgive me, i'm tired

egorey · 07-31-2003, 05:41 AM

low cost provider is great..

thanks,

jw_toyboy · 11-18-2003, 03:40 PM

POLITICALLY CORRECT PHRASES

He does not have a beer gut;
He has developed a Liquid Grain Storage Facility.

He is not quiet;
He is a Conversational Minimalist.

He is not stupid;
He suffers from Minimal Cranial Development.

He does not get lost all the time;
He discovers Alternative Destinations.

He is not balding;
He is in Follicle Regression.

He is not a redneck;
He is a Genetically-Related American.

You do not kiss him;
You become Facially Conjoined.

He is not a cradle robber;
He prefers Generationally Differential Relationships.

He does not get falling-down drunk;
He becomes Accidentally Horizontal.

He does not act like a total ass;
He develops a Case Of Rectal-Cranial Inversion.

He is not short;
He is Anatomically Compact.

He does not have a rich daddy;
He is a Recipient Of Parental Asset Infusion.

He does not constantly talk about cars;
He has a Vehicular Addiction.

He does not have a hot body;
He is Physically Combustible.

He is not unsophisticated;
He is Socially Malformed.

He does not eat like a pig;
He suffers from Reverse Bulimia.

He is not a bad dancer;
He is Overly Caucasian.

He does not hog the blankets;
He is Thermally Unappreciative.

He is not a sex machine;
He is Romantically Automated.

He is not a male chauvinist pig;
He has Swine Empathy.

You do not undress him with your eyes;
You have an Introspective Pornographic Moment.

He is not afraid of commitment;
He is Monogamously Challenged.

KellyC · 11-21-2003, 07:15 PM

Overcast

OMG thats so funny!!

SabrinaFair · 11-24-2003, 08:29 AM

Breasted American...
That one's going to have me giggling for a while.

07-30-2003, 08:27 AM	#1 (permalink)
Hanxter The Griffin	Politically Correctives... HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT - 2003 VERSION 1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN. 2. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE. 3. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE. 4. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION HIGHWAY. 5. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION. 6. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED. 7. She does not get DRUNK OR TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED. 8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED. 9. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE. 10. She is not a SL-T - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED. 11. She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PICTORIALLY SUPERIOR. 12. She is not a TWO-BIT WH0RE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER. HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT 1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY. 2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He suffers from OPPOSING FOOT DISORDER. 3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS. 4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION. 5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - he has GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS. 6. He does not get FALLING DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL. 7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION. 8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG -He has SWINE EMPATHY. 9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED. 10. He is not HORNY - He is SEXUALLY FOCUSED. 11. It is not his CRACK you see hanging out of his pants - It is REAR CLEAVAGE.

07-30-2003, 08:44 AM	#2 (permalink)
johnnymysto Overreactor Location: South Ca'lina	still good ones!!! __________________ "I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request." - Capt. Barbossa

07-30-2003, 04:12 PM	#3 (permalink)
PayUp DILLIGAF Location: AZ	i like those lists. almost true in a way __________________ Born to Lose.

07-30-2003, 04:25 PM	#4 (permalink)
Slims Eccentric insomniac Location: North Carolina	Good job, that's hilarious thanks __________________ "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill "All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

11-18-2003, 03:40 PM	#7 (permalink)
jw_toyboy Tilted Location: Australia	POLITICALLY CORRECT PHRASES POLITICALLY CORRECT PHRASES He does not have a beer gut; He has developed a Liquid Grain Storage Facility. He is not quiet; He is a Conversational Minimalist. He is not stupid; He suffers from Minimal Cranial Development. He does not get lost all the time; He discovers Alternative Destinations. He is not balding; He is in Follicle Regression. He is not a redneck; He is a Genetically-Related American. You do not kiss him; You become Facially Conjoined. He is not a cradle robber; He prefers Generationally Differential Relationships. He does not get falling-down drunk; He becomes Accidentally Horizontal. He does not act like a total ass; He develops a Case Of Rectal-Cranial Inversion. He is not short; He is Anatomically Compact. He does not have a rich daddy; He is a Recipient Of Parental Asset Infusion. He does not constantly talk about cars; He has a Vehicular Addiction. He does not have a hot body; He is Physically Combustible. He is not unsophisticated; He is Socially Malformed. He does not eat like a pig; He suffers from Reverse Bulimia. He is not a bad dancer; He is Overly Caucasian. He does not hog the blankets; He is Thermally Unappreciative. He is not a sex machine; He is Romantically Automated. He is not a male chauvinist pig; He has Swine Empathy. You do not undress him with your eyes; You have an Introspective Pornographic Moment. He is not afraid of commitment; He is Monogamously Challenged.

07-31-2003, 05:41 AM	#6 (permalink)
egorey Crazy	low cost provider is great.. thanks,

11-21-2003, 07:15 PM	#8 (permalink)
KellyC Comment or else!! Location: Home sweet home	Overcast OMG thats so funny!! __________________ Him: Ok, I have to ask, what do you believe? Me: Shit happens.

11-24-2003, 08:29 AM	#9 (permalink)
SabrinaFair Junkie Location: Louisville, KY	Breasted American... That one's going to have me giggling for a while. __________________ "With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy." -Desiderata