Expectations
 

A few years back, when I was considerably younger, I picked up a lovely date at her parents' home. I'd scraped together some money to take her to a fancy restaurant.

She ordered the most expensive items on the menu. Shrimp cocktail, A Kobe Beef Filet, and a bottle of the finest Champagne. I asked her, "Does your mother feed you like that when you eat at home?"

"No," she replied, "but my mother's not expecting a blow job tonight."

I said "Would you care for a nice dessert?"