![]() |
![]() |
#1 (permalink) |
Crazy
Location: Swamp Lagoon, North Cackalacky
|
THE Monkey Joke
(Bear with me, I'm writing this with the same words I tell it - hopefully it will come across well in print.)
So, this monkey is sittin' in a tree, smokin' some weed & gettin' high. After a while, this lizard comes strolling along and sees him. "Hey munky, whatcha doin'?" "Ah, man, I'm just lightin' a blunt, gettin' high... this is the SHIT, bro! Wanna join me?" So the lizard says "Okay, man, I'm down." After about a half hour of spliffin' up, the lizard stands up and, smacking his lips, says "Dude... I'm kinda thirsty. I'm gonna go down to the river and get a drink real quick." Monkey says "Sure, man, go ahead." So the lizard starts going out along a branch of the tree to climb down, but he's SO FUCKED UP that he loses balance and falls in the river. So he's just layiing there, floating down the river on his back. He's floating along, looking up at the clouds, feeling really mellow and loving life... After a bit, this alligator comes swimming by, and he says "Hey, lizard! What's your problem, dude?" Lizard says "Duuude, you gotta check it out - I was just up there in the tree with the monkey, roastin' some bud, and it kicked ASS!!! You gotta try it, man! It ROCKED!" So the Gator says "Alright, man, I think I'll give that a shot." So the Gator swims up to shore, and climbs up the tree until he sees the munky. Then he swivels his head out onto the branch and says "Hey, Monkey! You got any more of that ganga left?" And the munky replies "Duuuuuuuude.... How much water did you DRINK, maaaan?!?!?" (FYI, this was my "Joke of the Month" from around June 2005 until March of 2006. Mainly because I'm a sadist. ![]()
__________________
"Peace" is when nobody's shooting. A "Just Peace" is when we get what we want. - Bill Mauldin |
![]() |
![]() |
#2 (permalink) |
Master Thief. Master Criminal. Masturbator.
Location: Windiwana
|
hahaha, oh man.
i love it!
__________________
First they came for the Jews and I did not speak out because I was not a Jew. Then they came for the communists and I did not speak out because I was not a communist. Then they came for the trade unionists and I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist Then they came for me And there was no one left to speak out for me. -Pastor Martin Niemoller |
![]() |
Tags |
joke, monkey |
|
|