Biffaroo

GORE FILM IS 'INCONVENIENT BOLLOCKS' SAYS JUDGE


AL Gore’s climate change film An Inconvenient Truth is actually bollocks, a High Court judge ruled yesterday.



Despite Mr Gore's assertions, polar bears do not wear hats Mr Justice Brubaker said a number of statements made in the film were inconveniently completely untrue, including Mr Gore’s much publicised claim that all Polar bears now wore hats.

He said the former US Presidential candidate’s assertions that all dolphins had melted and that elephants were being forced to make footballs for Nike in India for slave wages were also, “a lot of cock”.

Justice Brubaker said: “According to Mr Gore climate change has forced monkeys to install air conditioning in their jungles and led to snakes growing arms so they can hold one of those personal electric fans. I don't think so.

“Anyway, if it is that bad why doesn’t he try turning off a few lights in his own mansion before telling the rest of us we have to recycle our own turds to stop our children from catching fire.”

However, the judge said the film could still be viewed in British schools as long as the head teacher stood up before each showing and said: “This is a flammed up can of old shite. Ignore it.”

A spokesman for Al Gore said: “The idea that former Vice President Gore would make an alarmist movie about climate change as a cynical and self-serving attempt to resurrect his political career is as wide of the mark as many of the claims we made in the film.”

Nisses

Is this supposed to be political humor?

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Moderation should be moderately moderated.

The_Jazz

If it is, it's in the right place. There's a rule against political humor in Politics. It belongs in Humor.

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"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

Nimetic

The dolphins are melting : (

Bill O'Rights

How do monkeys afford air conditioning? Where do they plug it in, and who's paying for the electricity to run it? Are they getting this paid for through some sort of state sponsored welfare system? Are tax dollars being spent on this Air Conditioning for Monkeys program, or is it funded through private donations?

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"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony

"Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus

It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.