EVERYBODY, SOMEBODY, NOBODY AND ANYBODY
 

Once upon a time, there were four people named everybody, somebody, nobody and anybody.

When there was an important job to be done, everybody was sure that somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but nobody did it.

When nobody did it, everybody got angry because it was everybody's job. Everybody thought that somebody would do it, but nobody realized that nobody would do it.

So it ended up that everybody blamed somebody when nobody did what anybody could have done in the first place.
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And, please, no comments about the above being in all caps. This is how I found it and I have no interest in retyping it.

I ain't everybody, Yes, I'm somebody, I'm not nobody, and I sure wouldn't want to be anybody! I'm positive I'm fucking not doing it!

The moral of the story: Nobody is Everybody's bitch!