That's easy for you
to say, with such demenere
local giving in

Where were we when we
Thought we knew where we were?
I have forgotten!

A keeper was tending his gibbons. Something about my sudden presence in the cage made him run off. Outside, a teacher was telling some children why the gibbon has long arms. Inside, a large gibbon demonstrated by grabbing my object by its nozzle, and knocking me about the face. The children screamed. The teacher yelled "Form a protective crocodile!" and dived to the floor. The gibbon sniffed the instrument, scratched its head, and - bang! - I remembered what it was. The bullet hit the side of a forlorn elephant, which had been repeatedly throwing its lunch of hay in the air. I think she was too depressed to notice.

Whoa! Excellent posting CSflim.
& then she went ballistic and slapped me upside the head. The world went dark and when it became lighter I thought there might be something wrong with gravity. But it was all in my head. The smaller head? Yay!!!!!!!!

The gibbon was now excited, and shot out through the open door. I stumbled after it, feeling a gloomy sense of danger as it headed towards the muffin bear terraces. Through the turmoil, I could see a single Asiatic bear rocking dismally from side to side. The gibbon began firing randomly into its pit. As I launched myself into a smothering dive, I heard a loud crack, and one of my thighs burst with pain. I rotated my head to see a tranquilliser dart sticking out of my leg, and turned back to find myself missing the startled ape, and plummeting into the bear's enclosure. Rolling around in dust, I began to feel vague. It seemed suddenly hot, so I took my clothes off. The keeper who had fired the dart was shouting words like "no," and "idiot." I found a roll-up. I lit it, took a deep drag, and offered it to the bear. With the cigarette in its mouth, it seemed to look happier. Then I knew I was collapsing, because I do know exactly what that feels like.

Nobody escapes life alive.

I can't stand it when Asiatic bears are dismal.

I see to be posting a bit fatalistically these last few posts..

When I woke up, I was in a strange bed. Most beds are strange to me. An advertising executive I know called Susie was sitting next to me, watching television. It showed a wobbly camcorder view of a naked man offering a cigarette to a shaking bear, and then falling over. A studio discussion followed these pictures. One man said we should be more careful with children and animals and the unemployed. He was interrupted by another, who said "rubbish, this is just another tawdry example of the prank generation." He said the man responsible was probably an American. I felt myself wanting to agree with the first man, but actually agreeing with the second, though I've absolutely no idea why.

Fate may be giving us what we want and later what we need. Why does time seem so linear when it goes everywhere?

everywhere everywhen everybody.

Doublepost will be merged

great story.. continue...

oh, and good morning.... it's 6.35am

Often at night I hear a crying sound coming out just below my nose.

And then the angel told me I was going to hell. I hated this idea and told the angel so but she just laughed and flapped her wings and flew away. I felt bereft for a moment but then realized the whole moment which seemed to take hours had only been an hallucination and that made it easier to get over...........

Bereft...... now theres a word one rarely hears..... It was in a song, if I recall..

Anyone remember the song, and the artist/group?

I know of no such song. And CSflim's story certainly s intriguing.

The angel fluttered back and blushed fetchingly. "There's been a clerical error in the front office," she admitted, "You don't have to go to hell after all, unless you really want to." Now here was a poser: Was this like special dispensation, or another test? "Could I have a look-see, and then change my mind?" I asked. "I'll have to check on that," she said and flapped away again, affording me a peek at some very pretty panties.

Nope, but I do remember that line from Aqualung: "Snot running down his nose/greasy fingers smearing shabby clothes."

Not enought mucus in music.

Sitting on a park bench, eying little girls with bad intent....

little shell, dainty
pink inside and crusty out
whose home were you then?

Now it's past last call for alcohol
Past recall has been here and gone
The landlord finally paid us all
The satin jazzmen have put away their horns
And we're standing outside of this wonderland
Looking so bereaved and so bereft
Like a Bowery bum when he finally understands
The bottle's empty and there's nothing left

Dire Straits - Your Latest Trick

Yes!!!! Ah, the vagaries of memory.

The angel flew back in and told me I had carte blanche. The freedom to move between realities was...refreshing. She gave me a short couse on how to do it, then went away to take care of other business. I couldn't help noticing that she'd changed her panties. "Now why," I wondered, "would an angel have to do that?" Heaven and hell were much the same, and the other planets also. Tomorrow I must try to figure out what time it is.
As Scarlett O'Hara Butler "said": "Tomorrow is another day!"

I saw a teeming
shrimp, upon the northern strait
why am I faced east?

5422 posts since some fool started this whole mess......

If a man walks through a forest,
and there no women around,
is he still wrong?

Would be in my house......

OH damn!!!!

He'd be wrong in my neck of the woods, too.

nuh, nuh nuh nuh, nuh nuh, nuh nuh.
Can't touch this.

At least we can look,
And marvel, and be amazed.
Life is more than good!

Yet another post. tada

And another one,
With more coming, I believe;
Please be tasty ones.....

Do they have suicide hotlines in the Middle East?

Do they scream Allah?
Really hoping for virgins?
Can life be so bad?

Hey look! Its 1:10 AM! Gotta run. http://www.anchoredbygrace.com/smileys/icon_bolt.gif

5434 posts since that first one.....

Write Pen 15 on your hand, to be part of the pen club. Do it now.

what club?
And if a tree falls in the forest while I am writing it did I write it wrong?
And what happened to Schrödinger's cat? I bet the little girl got together with santa's little helper and had kittens.

Just do it. Don't question me, god dammit, zed! WOLF! Sniper Wolf! You killed Meryl, but you won't get me! Foxdie might, but you won't. I'll get you, and then I'll roundhouse kick Liquid off that walking nuclear tank (damn bastard killed master Miller).

What was she saying?
Life is so much easier
If haiku, haiku.

I love Meryl Streep.

Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15 Pen 15

I wrote it but then
nobody called nobody
and I was alone.

Biz.... have you lost the plot again...?

There wasn't a plot
Only Santa's balls hanging
And momma kissed him!

Oh my...
or yours...
who's?
I'll stick with 27.115 Mhz. and 1/2Kw

3 days till xmas.... wonder what I should buy the bride.....

A bride at Xmas,
what a gift! She wanted more
And didn't get it,,,,,,

I want a new pair of thongs. The footwear variety!

I won't be shopping for thongs for months yet. It finally snowed today.
Belatedly I'm beginning to believe in global warming.

I wish it would snow here.... Its gonna be Farkin' hot here the next few days....

Well, it's summer there!

So? I want snow!

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all; and a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures, and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform, or sexual preference of the wishees.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

........................ i dont check this enough.

.............................. yes, it's been a while. Welcome back

smoke them if ya got them!

tyres?????????

Here is nothing of value. :)

I like eggs and bacon, I like eggs and bacon... and if you think I'm going to sing, you're very much mistaken!

Yeah...well, I like green eggs and ham.

well, I like tits, tater tits, that is..

Dale sr. was cool. So was DW back in the day.

Not to mention LB, RD, AP, WZ and BO.

BO isn't cool. I once slept with a man whose BO had me close to gagging the entire time. It wasn't the most fun I've had.

Don't be a dirty cock sucker! make him wash first.

The use of the word "once" in my post is even more apt than usual. :)

Are we still on the same thread? I fell asleep.

I would rip out my BO glands, to sleep with Sharon....

I don't think I have seen her. must be really cute. or a girl.

That would be me.

Just felt obligated to be a part of this. Never mind me, carry on with what you were so seriously discussing.

Whoa! Growth.

Wow, dudes. This thread is really pumpin'

Pump it up!
Pump it good,
Pump it into shape;
Shape it up....

My offering this christmas morning, and a good day to all

Merry, merry christmas to all the girls and boys,
and everybody else.

Greetings and all that crap.

Merry crap?

Yay!! it's over!!!!!!!!!!

Now Boxing day is over too......

Is Boxing Day the day I get to let someone rummage around my box?

Pick me! Pick me!

I made something up
But the syllables were short
And sorry am I?

I started a joke, but....

... couldn't remember the punchline?

I'd have let you rummage around my box... but it's now no longer boxing day... :(

"And he laughs before the joke is over" - regarding some European among the islanders. -Anybody?

I have a fat tire.

I don't ever want to see a roasted turkey again for as long as I live.

So... can I be first in line, next boxing day? :)

Not me...


How fat?.....


And I'll bet the turkey is happy about that, as well...

.

Her wild fine buttocks
Drove me crazy, half insane
I wished I had some.

You wished you had buttocks?

He carefully peered around the corner of the bathroom, and saw, before him, ...

In a nutshell I
Wished I had her wild fine ones
They were beautiful!:thumbsup:

Y'all are just weird.

I wish I had Kate Beckinsale's buttocks - dame she's got herself one fine ass.

Ima boob man, meself, I am....

Well boobs are upfront
In plain sight and making contours
Gotta love 'em, don't we?

(.) (.)


Thats what I'm talkin' 'bout....

Which brings to mind something I read somewhere...

here is another pointless post.

I don't understand the whole boob fascination. Please explain.

Why should I contribute to this? Are there free banjos being given away?

wow this is getting long these days

/bump

:thumbsup: