Don't ask me
 

I figured I'd let you all know now that I'm an imbecile so don't ask me anything.

I can't even read.




Seriously, don't ask me.






I mean it.





really.

How many fingers am I holdig up? *holds up a toe*

whats the point of the thread?

Don't sell yourself short. I'm sure there is something that you can add.

Soooooooooo we care? :)

you both asked questions.

Now you'll just have to deal with the answers you get.

somenosuke: I'm gonna guess Alabama

krwlz: to get everyone to not ask me.

I made a thread about a week ago with the exact same idea, title and everything. I'm going to sue you for all your left socks, some pocket lint and your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roomate's first born child.

Why ya gotta be like that, huh?
:D

Too late I already did that...you can have half, of course it's going to get messy when it gets to splitting the first born. If we use a coping saw it'll be a nice clean cut.

No use a
"laser"

(imagine it with the doctor evil finger parenthesis)

all I have is a laser pointer...it'll take a while.

pffft

overclock that like a mofo

Why?

well JumpinJesus on a pogo stick;
if I can't ask you, I guess I'll have to tell you!
42
air
blue
69
:lol:
because
and finally...................
a large orange bowl !

These questions are giving me a headache.

Spungfoo, don't sue me, I'm only an imbecile. All I have are left socks. You don't want to see me go barefooted, do you?

And lasers are like robots. In fact, they are robots; really bright robots that are evil.

I think Marco said it best in his "Don't Ask Me" thread on TFPv3

"Wow. I can't even keep control in a thread that doesn't offer any answers. I feel like the pope."

I think that quote needs to be preserved for all eternity.

. . .




(following directions again)

Why do you look so much like Marky Mark?

That one was a really oldie.
I was reading through and I said to my self "Hey, is qpid really back" then I looked at the date.

Are you sure I posted this thread? I think Charlatan is doing some creative moderation somewhere.

If anyone ever sees a photo of me naked anywhere here, I want you to know it wasn't me.

I will say, though, that the OP is correct. I don't know a damn thing. Seriously.


No, really.

Oh... you know something. I am sure of it. You look guilty in those naked pictures.

Since you want no questions, here are some answers:

Darth Vader is Luke's father. The woman in the "Crying Game" is really a man. Ole Yeller dies. In "Murder on the Orient Express" they all did it. Captain Kirk isn't really dead, he's in the Nexus; but then he dies for real later. On July 4th, we killed all the aliens by giving them a computer virus which took down their shields. Verbal is Kaiser Solteh. The North wins. The Nazi's lose. Tom Cruise screws over the firm and gets away. Jeff Bridges did kill his wife in "Jagged Edge". Galron is a shapeshifter imposter. Fortran really is dead. Harrison Ford always, always saves the day. In "Crimson Tide", Denzel Washington is right. Jim Phelps is the one who betrays the Impossible Mission team. All of the "Reservoir Dogs" die. Robert Redford hits a game-winning homer at the end of "The Natural". James Bond gets the girl. Lestat isn't really dead. Leia is Luke's sister. Henry V wins, but barely. Cousin Vinny gets the "two yutes" off, but only after Marisa Tomei's expert testimony. Richard Gear ends up with the slut in "Pretty Woman". Spock dies, then comes back to life on a planet where Kirk's son gets killed, and proceeds to help save the whales and earth by travelling back and forth in time in a Klingon ship, but doesn't get demoted for stealing the Enterprise because he wasn't there, he was dead. ET goes home. In "Blade Runner" Rachael is a replicant -- some think that Deckard may be too. Mel Gibson dies at the end of "Braveheart", but the future queen is pregnant with his kid. Sean Penn did do it in "Dead Man Walking". The Wizard of Oz is really a short, fat, bald man. Nicolas Cage dies at the end of "Leaving Las Vegas". In "Field of Dreams", "He" is Costner's father. Mr. Holland's former students play his opus in the end -- the redhead becomes governor. The Apollo 13 crew makes it back safely. Barnabus is a vampire. Al Pacino shoots and kills Robert DeNiro. In "Speed" there is a videocamera on the bus and a hole under the trash can. OJ did it. Harry marries Sally. To get to the other side. The prisoner is Pip's benefactor. Romeo and Juliet kill themselves. Either a newspaper or a half-eaten zebra. Sue Ellen's sister shot J.R. Maggie shot Mr. Burns (not on purpose). Bobby's death was just a dream (Pam's). The HAL9000 computer goes homicidal, but it isn't his fault. (Incidentally, the letters followng HAL are IBM.) There is always someone in the back seat. Jack gets old and dies. In "Terms of Endearment" Debra Winger gets cancer and dies. Bill Clinton wears briefs. Rosebud is the sled.

Tophat,

Why? Why???????

*sob*

Since you don't know anything... you're the perfect person to ask:
what is the meaning of life?

which is better... jelly beans and sex... or....... cheesecake and rollerskating?

How come every time i read "Toddle Pip!" .. I laugh? :hmm:

why am i easily so amused?

If love is just an emotion... why does it make us feel like we're physically flying?

If Lust is just a mental response... why does it feel like an emotion?

:) that should keep you busy since you don't know anything.........................



sweetpea

This is the most confusing thread I've ever seen.

Is this to lend credence to the old adage that those who can...do, and those who cannot...teach? :D

Snap!!!


Do you smell something burning?
:lol:

Okay, now that was funny. I LOL'd in real life. :D

If a bear can play golf... does that mean a rabbit can play soccer?

sweetpea

hey, /me plays golf!!!

If a hen and a half lays an egg and a half in a day and a half, how long will it take a grasshopper with a wooden leg to kick all of the seeds out of a dill pickle?

Maybe I wasn't clear enough earlier. I certainly hope no one is expecting any answer because there will be none forthcoming.

I'm sorry if this disappoints anyone for that was not my intent. I should have kept my big mouth shut.

Okay, there is one answer I can give.

BOR,
I teach because I can't. :D

no answers?!!! no answers...

:)

If i ask a question and no one answers.. is it still a question?

:D

sweetpea

If a tree falls on a mime in a forest, does anybody care?

I think the lumberjack would care, when he finds mime juice everywhere!

Mime juice goes nicely with gin. It makes a Mimlet.