He relaxed into it, thinking, "This is what I've been waiting for!"
One said, "I know my products."
Stallion wilted.

"Gees, bro," said S2, "you can give me words without giving me nightmares."
Stallion whacked him. "Since you're me, you must understand... Tend to our riders!"

"One Unplastic is distracting," demurred S2, "If I can get her attention, she'll respond."
Stallion whacked him again.

"What the fuck was that for?" asked S2.
"Tend to your rider," grumbled Stallion, leaving S2 muddling.
"Wait up!" he cried.

#3 had been waiting for such an opening.

"You should listen harder to your other self," he said.

"You wanna walk?" his carrier asked.

//"Watch yourself!" came crying, "Jismy Critical's everywhere!"
"What in Hell was that?" asked Mr. C.
"Don't move!" his lover responded.//

//"What are we doing back here?" asked Snoddi, depressed by the beige surroundings of the three amigo's loft.
"I can only work with the materials I have," said Runni, "Haven't you been eating well?"
"#3's off tending to your kids, but I'm sure I can whip up a little something," offered Silenus.//

"No! No more whippings, por favor. Five more days, just five more."
Before Snoddi & Runni could ask,
Silenus explained: "Disregard my whimpering mumble-mouth Cousin.
He's preparing for another hard-awakening.

Louden & Merrick began to stir.

Silenus asked Snoddi to let the dogs out.

"C'mon, boys," he said cheerfully.

Louden & Merrick pantingly complied, but the 17 who followed hadn't learned any manners yet, & tripped Snoddi onto the grass. "Could have been worse," he reckoned, inhaling deeply.

Some time later, Silenus called, "Luncheon is served!"

"Good thing, too," Snoddi said to himself, "I've got the munchies!"

The Cousin of Silenus decided: 'to heck with waiting for Mercury. I'm hungry now.'

He roused. Sitting under the table, eagerly awaiting the fine orts, he questioned Runni.

"I've lost count. Two Stallions, seventeen puppies & how many spores?"

"Now, cuz," murmured Runni, as she slipped him a quiche, "you no doubt know better than I. You haven't lost your connection with Desiree's hairnet, have you?"
"Just trying to make conversation," he grumbled.

Snoddi nudged him with his toe & handed him a piece of melon.

"Don't take it too hard, little guy," he comforted, "she's been a little abrupt since her experiment with latex."

The sound of hoofbeats came to them through the open windows, and the dogs set up a chorus.

Desiree struggled in, supporting her brother.
#3 followed, enjoying one unplastic's cling.
"Something smells good," he said, "I could eat a horse!"
Both horses whinnied disapprovingly from the porch.
"Well, well, well!" said Silenus, "Who's the trollop?"
Before #3 could answer, as his countenance colored, there came a cry from the crawlspace. "Somebody help me!" it said, "I made a deal with the devil & the damn thing demands more."
Silenus was on it, like white on rice, & went clattering down the stairs.
"Was that Jackass Credential?" asked Runni of the room.
"I think so," said Snoddi, "Please pass the pancakes."
#3 was torn with indecision..."I'd better go see if I can help," he told one, disentangling himself.
"But I'm all alone here," she said, inexplicably.
"Introduce yourself & you won't be," quite rudely, he headed after Silenus.
"Here, dear," said Runni, "the sausages are quite juicy."
"Give me some!" came Cousin, cantankerous, "& pass down some OJ, as well."

Igor had to duck as he strode through the door.
Napkins flew.
He stood in the foyer dripping. He turned to Cantore and asked,

"Am I off course?"

"As if escaping from Satan's embrace & being groped by my groupies as they helped me come home wasn't enough, now I'm expected to counsel a tropical storm? Get out of here, Igor. I'll be with you, directionless." Joyless Causality sat down at the table & served himself a heaping helping of hashbrowns.

http://s2.hubimg.com/u/3408541_f520.jpg

The Stallions were quietly communing, the closest they could come to reconnecting.
"I've been thinking," started S2.
"That we could take additional advantage of our situations," finished Stallion, because he had been thinking the same.
"Exactly. Field trip?"
"We're good to go!"

Just then, Cousin emerged with a straight-razor held delicately in his left hand.
"Which way did the storm blow?" he asked them. "Jelly Croissanwich needs a heading."

"Igor bumped off the hills & then back out to sea," they said in unison, shared a look, & stepped down off the porch. "See ya."

"I've seen a lot of things," Cousin said to himself, "but I didn't believe my eyes that time," & reentered the house.
Jihm Contentment had just polished off his third plate.
"Nothing for me?" Cousin asked, disappointed.
"No," said J.C., "You?"
"The horses report the storm's back out at sea."
"I'll call the Coast Guard."

"You've been wronger," opined Cousin, "but the Coast Guard isn't who you need to call."
"My last call fucked itself," said Jill Conflicted, "& I didn't enjoy the sensation."

Jaime Contralto sang out: " The Stallions are coalescing convergent!"

Snoddi pointed, his mouth silently agape.
Runni, anticipating The ensuing Richter numbers, held the table steady.

The Cousin Of Silenus, still beneath the table, bit her ankle.

"Desist,you ort scrounging scoundrel," she bellowed.

Igor's last gasp/gust, flung the Stallions far afield.

"You didn't know, did you?" asked Runni.
"No, what?" hers responded.
"I've been using your guts to produce our realities."
"I felt that," said Snoddi, "but reading too much into it seemed vain."
"Oh honey!" said Runni, "Grow into your own skin."

The stallions cantered up, looking strangely relieved.

"You've been on facebook, haven't you?" said Runni, tut-tutting.

They didn't quibble.

"Do you want a ride somewhere?" asked Stallion.
"Or somewhere else?" S2 rejoined.
"Watch yourself!" said Stallion, "We're in company."

S2 flicked his tail.

"I'm surprised we aren't more excited," said Silenus from his window-monitor position.

"I should do the dishes," said #3.

Rhodes handed #3 the dish-washing manual.

The Ghost of Igor offered to dry them.

Incorporeal, with a high behind him, he did the job handlessly.

"Can I go play outside now?" he asked.

Desiree's hairnet let out a high-pitched squeal that threw him into the closet.

Runni & Snoddi both looked at her in alarm, but Silenus only shrugged.

"It's not like residual humidity will hurt our cashmere," he said.

Jittery Charismatic's feverish brow rode its own thermals in search of Igor's trail.

Snoddi fussed & fumed, " What about the Moth Eating Ones?"

"Go sleep with the hamsters!" Silenus roared.

"Huh?" Snoddi blinked.

Runni explained, "It's a cedar thing. Do what he says."

"Mom," asked Rhodes, "why are you so dismissive of Dad?"
"He's only really good for one thing," said Runni.
"Have you checked his internet status lately?" asked Desiree, "According to It he has quite a few skills."
"Thinking for himself isn't one of them," sniffed Runni, "you must trust me about this."
"Why should I trust you at all?" whined Rhodes, "I resemble that remark!"
Desiree poked him. "Don't you dare tell!" she hissed.
"I blame Desiree!" blurted Rhodes.
"I blame the merman!" retorted Desiree.

"You should blame the system & your own reactions to it," said Cousin.
"Oh, shut up!" said Runni, so he bit her again.

Meanwhile, Snoddi was comfortable in the hamster cage. The Ghost of Igor was comfortable amongst the cashmere. Joy Contagious had forgotten what he was looking for & was making himself quite comfortable in the leather closet, two doors down.

one unplastic sat in the corner, looking quite lost.

"Some house-guests you bring me, #3," said Silenus, "& don't you dare shrug!"
#3 shrugged & said, "You taught me a lot."

Silenus failed to restrain himself, & slapped #3.
"Where's your manual?"
"Where's your Manuel?"

"Boys," said one unplastic, "I've had some experience in the alley."

They looked at her with new regard.

"Alrighty, then, listen up," she smiled, "I'm not slumming for nothing."

"There's no need to question my heritage!" huffed Silenus.
"What?" fluffed #3.

"Cousin's coming with me," said too, unplastically, "& I'll need the recipe for the quiche."
"I'd be happy to, sweetheart," said Cousin, his mind racing as it always did, to spite appearances, "but why do we need quiche?"

"You'll need your energy," she assured him.

"France, again?" whispered Runni.
"Harvest my guts at your pleasure," said Snoddi, "someplace warm if they've got it, without hamsters."
"I can't guarantee that, but olfactorally stimulating, yes! Cedar becomes you."
"Good enough," he acknowledged, & watched, mystified, as she created an impressionistic scene, complete with feelings.

Cousin said to one, "I'm still not sure quite how she does that..."
one unplastic said, "I have a handle on S2. Let's get you back into orbit."

Desiree's hairnet's squealed again, but more gently this time, unsure how they'd maintain their connection.

The merman felt a tingling, somewhere near his tail.

"I knew their cohesiveness would require my assistance!"

Desiree grabbed the taser from the grasp of One Unplastic's appendage.

"Ow," came the multiple cries from her hair net.

" Look at them fly & glow!," TACO shouted.

Jiminy Crockett began to report Northern Light Sightings.

The Sightings began reporting back.

13 from the north infiltrated positions.

Desiree rejoiced at her offspring's multi directional choices,while

she & Jarmony Correlator watched the spore-lights configure their own
constellations.

Silenus said: "I see thrones & giant pianos"

Rhodes saw: " fetching fillies near & far a field,'

Snoddi procaimed: "look! There are hamsters wielding paint brushes!"

The rest of the company awaited...patiently as possible, believing the show of placement
would continue well into the moonless night.

"Runni, noooo!" cried Snoddi, but quickly relinquished when he smelled the fresh Meditteranean breezes coming from her porthole.

"Well, that was unusual," said Silenus, characteristically disinterested, as they disappeared, "Now, back to the hamsters."

"I'd rather watch my sister's sparkling hairnet wonder babies," said Rhodes.

"I'd rather watch your sister's moon rising," said #3.

"Yes & yes," said Desiree.

Stallion shrugged & let the dogs out. The Ghost of Igor, having learned he was allergic to cashmere, let himself out. The Merman, part seahorse, sat offshore & brooded.

While horses are patient, fish expect you to think more slowly.

Stallion was, therefore, unsurprised when the tide came in replete with baby seahorses.

"I'm warm-blooded!" he neighed.
"I am, too!" said the Merman.
"Sire!" cried Desiree, her hair unattractive, "Look at the sky."

When he looked up he was mystified. The Sparkles spelled out, "Don't hurt our father," across the vault of the heavens.

"Truce?" offered the Merman.
"Truce," agreed Stallion, "May I offer you a drink?"
"Anything but saltwater," he replied as he wriggled ashore.

"Where are you going, Mom-Dad?" asked his babies, in unison.

"Who have you been fucking with?" asked Desiree, with murder in her eyes.

(#3 had forgotten the manual, so she wasn't all that happy.)

Luckily, Manuel strode up, complete with his tool belt.

Rhodes was startled but impressed.

"Got any odd-jobs needing doing?" asked Manuel with an accent.

Silenus asked to see Manuel's driver's license.

Rhodes handed Manuel a copy of his rights.

The sea horses began to tremble & whispered to Merman,
"No one told us there are wrights here!"

Desiree accused Silenus of unfair profiling.

Stallion took Silenus aside momentarily.

Meanwhile: The rest of the gang became wet & or dried out,
at the Neon Seahorse. A great little establishment located at the corner of 20'th & Valencia. It being not terribly obscure, there wasn't a Hipster in sight.

The two elder Hoofed Ones, cloven & not, stood just outside the entrance,
taking the last deep drags of what they had lit.

They entered the dim, red lit small club.

"So tell us what the fuss was about Silenus?" A few asked in unison.

Stallion explained, "Silenus was concerned. It was the tool belt. He thought Orion might be in disguise & after him again. Those two need to call a truce."

Silenus cleared his throat, politely for a satyr.

"I wasn't profiling, I was profileering. It's part of my nature," he explained.

The former hairnet scattered, searching for a definition.

"Sis?" whispered Rhodes, "Are YOU still connected to THEM?"
"I feel that way, bro'," she soothed, "but I don't feel like myself anymore."

The merman shifted uncomfortably on his bar-stool.
"Thanks for the cocktail, friend Stallion," he said, "Could you give me a lift back to the beach?"
"It will be my pleasure," said Stallion, distracted, "I don't think you need to worry about Desiree any less, since her mind's been expanded."
"I'll bear that in mine."

"Did you feed the dogs before we left?" asked Silenus of #3.
"I forgot," said #3, gesturing towards Manuel, who was sitting in the corner twiddling his...thumbs, "He looks like he needs something to do."
"You should go with him," said Silenus.

Runni & Snoddi reclined in the attic, enjoying the scenery.

"Do you think we should go help them?" asked Snoddi.
"Not just yet," Runni said, putting her tongue in his mouth.

one unplastic removed hers from Cousin's.

"I'm glad they're not on my back," thought S2.

The Ghost of Igor snuggled up to Desiree's former hairnet, fascinated. He was finding being a ghost strangely fulfilling.

Meanwhile:
Silenus continued lecturing his easily confused crop of verdant students on the difference between Psoriasis & Satyriasis.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...is_BM_E768.jpg

saying:

"My instincts are wrong,
while I still smell edible?
Why are you afraid?"

Desiree raised her hand, a little shakily. "I know, I know!" she cried.
Rhodes stepped up beside her. "I think I know, too," he said.

The Cousin of Silenus took three steps back and widened his eyes three times.

"What's the matter with you,TACO?" Desiree asked

Rhodes offered the use of his telescope.

One particularly bright, eager verdant student, raised one hand & pointed with the other:

"Silenus is a Leo, isn't he? & that's his driver's license."

"This doesn't bode well," whispered the Ghost through the hairnet, "Our real-time connection seems to be slipping!"
He was immediately bombarded with an overwhelming series of random images & sensations. "Please slow it down!" he begged.
"This is our nature," they murmured, but tried to comply.
Almost as quickly dissatisfied with less input as with more, he reconsidered his motives.
The hairnet considered his mind.
"WOULD...YOU...MAKE...IT...UP?" they asked, as if speaking to an idiot.
"Give me a break," he said, "I haven't had it very long."
They briefly considered how easy it would be to dissipate the ghost of a storm, but instead gathered around him supportively.
"This, too, is our nature," they told him.
The Ghost of Igor relaxed into their embrace, no longer wondering why he had stiffened in the first place.

Rhodes offered: " First Symphony Syndrome."

Desiree allowed a hint of a smile & didn't need to speak.

Stallion snorted. S2 noticed. Off they cantered.
One unplastic moved closer to cousin, & squeezed his hand.
#3 came running, manual in hand, & offered to make it up to Desiree.
Rhodes & the puppies frolicked about with abandon.
"Am I the only one who doesn't get it?" moaned their lecturer.
"No, mi amigo, you are not," said Manuel.

The canine Newfoundland brothers conversed on the back porch.

It was Louden's turn to pick first.

"I prefer the marrow of phalanges, but I'm having a difficult time deciding."

Merrick announced: "I'll humour your hesitation for half a minute & then the humerus is mine.

For quite some time, the only sounds were of cracking bones & slaps and tickles, to the gentle accompaniment of background radiation.

* * *

In France, Runni suddenly paused in the middle of what she was doing.
"What are you doing?" asked Snoddi.
"I need to paint!" she exclaimed, leaping out of the saddle. "Have you got any beige left?"

"No guarantees, Runni; our diet's been different for the past few weeks."
Runni did her magic while Snoddi looked the other way, & managed to paint them into the woods near the cabin. "Check this out!" she blurted.
Snoddi already had noticed the overwhelming coalescence & found himself incapable of averting his eyes.
"Stallion," knickered S2, "we've got company."

Startled by the sudden appearances: Cabin Boy dropped his load of wood.

"Oh Chuck! I thought you would be used to our droppings by, by now," Runni chided.

"Yes, ma'am!" he blurted, blushing, "Your sauna will be ready in twenty minutes."

"How did he know what I needed?" Runni asked Snoddi, as Chuck moved away with his regathered wood, "Did you phone ahead or something?"
"Do I ever know in advance where we're going?" he countered.

The brief interruption had allowed the Stallions time to regain some semblance of composure. "We think the hairnet had something to do with it," said S2.

"We'll have something to do with everything from now on," the background stated, "Fear not!"

Stallions 2 & 1 waved them cheerily on, & said: "Go fuck yourselves! We enjoy it. It's fun!"

"That's coarse," Snoddi chokingly whispered to Runni.

"Your voice is all of a sudden hoarse." she replied.

Desiree looked down at #3, her body burning.
"I'm so glad you found your book!" she gasped.
"I'm improvising, now," he admitted, & resumed his ministration.

Rhodes suddenly imagined they were playing hide-and-seek, & led the puppies on a random search. Louden & Merrick watched them gallop past, favored each other with a mutually satisfied sigh, and dozed off again, digesting bones.

The hairnet instructed Chuck to use herbal medley 5 in the water for the sauna.

Cousin came to when he heard the herd of puppies yapping past. He looked around for one unplastic, but she'd disappeared. "It seems she's even more flexible than she felt," he thought, & got up to begin his own search.

Silenus & Manuel were up in the loft, sharing a cigarette.
"You're even handier than I thought," said Silenus.
"I didn't know you smoked," said Manuel.
They shared a chuckle & then discussed lunch.

Rhodes & the puppies bounded up to where Chuck was tending the bonfire.
"Hello!" he said cheerily.
Chuck eyed him, up and down. "Hello?" he returned, with an extra inflection.
"Whatcha doing?" asked Rhodes, as if innocent.
"I'm heating up rocks for the sauna," said Chuck, "Would you bring me that wheelbarrow?"
Eager to please, Rhodes trotted to it, but a whisper from the bushes distracted him.

"Don't look for me," it gossipped. It sounded like one unplastic, but peer as Rhodes might, he could see nothing in the shadows.
"What are you doing hiding in the bushes?"
"I'm hiding nothing," the whisper insisted, "I'm hiding my nothingness, more properly. I seem to have disappeared."
"I can smell you," he said, "Will you join us in the sauna when it's ready?"
"I don't think I should. I might dissipate completely in the steam."
"I'll hold your hand," Rhodes promised, not yet having verified that he could actually touch the owner of the strangely familiar whisper from the bushes.

Their touch started as the lightest caress, but intensified into a full-body embrace that was breathtaking, before relaxing back into what felt like a warm hand in his own. He still couldn't see anything, but he smiled to the air & announced, "I had the feeling you had substance."
"I'm not sure, myself," the whisper tickled his ear, "Let me push the wheelbarrow & see."
"Giddy up, Rhodes!" called Chuck, "These rocks are glowing."
Imagine his thoughts as the wheelbarrow came towards him, apparently propelling itself.

Rarely one to look a gift horse in the mouth, Chuck picked up his shovel & started loading.
Trying to make himself useful, Rhodes stirred the steeping herbs.

+++

"Let's see just how handy you can be, Manuel," said Silenus.
http://s4.hubimg.com/u/173935_f260.jpg
"Thanks for your input. I'm glad I came," said Manuel.

He laid his lips to the pipes and a rapturous melody filled the environment.
"Good!" crooned Silenus, "VERY, very good!"
Manuel fairly glowed with pleasure at the praise, but faltered in his fluting when he glanced out the window, where the hillside itself appeared to be moving.

=+=

"Runni," said Snoddi, from not far away, "Do you see what I'm seeing?"
"Yes," she said, worried, "What's Desiree doing approaching it?"

As the music from the loft faded, the hillside resumed its stillness, but Desiree spoke to it firmly. "I can feel you in there," she said to it, "You should come kiss your mother hello."
The hillside gave an earthy moan & shivered.
The hairnet sparkled & hummed.

"Sauna's ready!" called Chuck from out back. When nobody came 'round, he told Rhodes, "We might as well enjoy it while it's hot."
"Are you ready?" Rhodes asked one unplastic, & felt her hand grip his as she said, "Yes."
As they stepped into the scented steam, she gripped him tighter...

"Manuel!" called Desiree, imperiously, "Play it again!"
Mystified but complacent, Manuel licked his lips & blew.

The music resumed, & the hillside its motion.
"Darlings!" cried Desiree, "I thought you were lost."

"That explains why you didn't search for us," said their spokesman.

"Not exactly," said Desiree, "I've been worried about my brother."

"As if one who shares half your genes is superior," opined the spokesman, "you would hold us inferior?"
"I would hold you in any case," she said.
"How can we trust you?" the hillside asked.

"You shouldn't," she answered.
"You mustn't" said Runni.
"You will," reckoned Snoddi. "although I'm confused. It's not like my business created you, is it?"

"Do you think we care, "Mother"?" asked the hillside.
"Do you think I don't?" she asked in return.
"Yes, we don't," & they went back the way they had come, so she knew the ground might betray her.
"Sis," said Rhodes, "What you think isn't serving you."
"Bro," said his sister, "Shut the fuck up."

The sauna was warm, but its heat not overcoming, as Rhodes led his sister within.
"Welcome, Fair Lady," said Chuck, ladling another splash of water onto the rocks.
"Thank you," she said, & relaxed for a moment..."You're not gonna fuck with me, are you?"
"Only if you ask for it," said Chuck, as he shared a not-all-that-mysterious chuckle with Rhodes, "but first let me see how you handle this spruce."
Runni rushed in, Snoddi hot on her tail. "Desiree, don't! You'll only inflame them."
"Are you thinking, Mom, I don't know what you haven't?"
"I'm thinking, my dear, that we share some some lusts."
"Cousin," said Snoddi, "Now might be good."
one unplastic released her hold on Rhodes' hand. "I didn't see you come in!"
"I keep some things to myself," he said, ignoring her invisible blush.
"So," he asked Runni, "How are your kids?"

"Does anybody else feel a little light-headed?" asked Rhodes.
"It could be the fumes," opined Cousin, "we know of your weakness."
"I feel a little light-headed," whispered one unplastic, "but I'd like to know more about his weakness."
"All I smell is herbs & musk," said Chuck.
"I think all I smell is musk," said Rhodes.
"Take my hand, quickly!" said one unplastic, " I admitted to having a plastic basis, not to being artificial. - SAVE ME!" Her cry dissipated into the steam.
"Where are you?" asked Rhodes..."Does anyone else feel her?"
Cousin gave him a one-armed hug. "How's your head?"
"Not better than it was a minute ago," answered Rhodes, "Just different..."

Runni became alarmed. "Snoddi! Can you still smell me?"
Snoddi sighed & answered calmly, "I can do whatever yoou want. Where are we going this time?"
"Wherever you want, my Amaze-man," she said, "I only know that I want to be away, & to think about what I've been doing."
"Runni," said Cousin, "in spite of your abilities, it's not all about you."

Desiree, oddly, was trying to comfort Rhodes.
"What did you do with #3?" he asked her.
"None of your bizness!" she snapped. "He's safe with Silenus."

The hillside surrounded the sweat-lodge, still writhing.
The hairnet hovered serenely.
Manuel's pan-pipes played counterpoint.
There were dogs outside, & the horses, exhausted, but raring to go.

"You know why that doesn't work," saidasked Stallion.
"It's because they can't really smell us?" answered a wondering S2.
"That's my boy!" said Stallion, "Let's extricate ourselves for the time being. Even Runni can't paint herself into our corner, not knowing our colors."
"I might have pooped a little," admitted S2.
"That's okay," assured Stallion, "as long as you don't have hemorrhoids."

The dogs set up a ruckus as the horses departed. One puppy was quick enough to grab a tail.

***

"What's all that outside noise?" asked Chuck, unused to too many things too unnatural.
"Chuck," answered Cousin, "I've been watching your neophyte utility, so I know that's a ridiculous question, coming from you."
"Don't give him too hard a time, Cousin," said Runni, "if you don't know how to trail the horses, we could be stuck here in steamy brown for a very long time."
"Runni," said Snoddi, "let's go back to France-without-Hamsters."
"That was a fantasy," said Runni, "How about Lebanon? They still have some cedars."

Silenus & #3 were already on the roof, nailing shingles.

"You think we know the right thing?" asked #3.
"You don't think protecting them from the elements isn't," returned Silenus, "I'll disappear if they forget about woodchucking."
"You're thousands of years old, you half-goat!"
"You just met me a few months ago. What do you do for a living?"
"I'm an emt. What happened to Manuel?"
"Desiree & I did a hand-off."
"You wood chuck!"

Manuel played. The ground net hummed. The hair net smiled.
"Should I work up another incarnation?" asked the ghost of Igor, "I could do it.
"Can you cool off?" asked the hair net, a little miffed.
"I can blow snowstorms," said Igor.

Cousin said, "It's not as if I didn't warn you, Desiree."
Desiree allowed, "New shoes aren't part of the answer? How beautiful will life be without them?"
"I don't speak to beauty. I speak to the practicality that was abandoned, way too long ago."
"My mom was on a cruise," said Desiree.
"My point exactly," said Cousin.

"Whatever you think of me," snapped Desiree, "my derivation's none of your business."
"I beg to back up a little," said Cousin.
"Talk to me through MY hairnet!" she screamed.
"Settle down, "mother"," hummed the hairnet, "Our siblings pronounce you in danger."
Desiree blanched. Cousin recessed. one unplastic was...gone.
Rhodes manned up. "Chuck!" he exclaimed, "Switch to #1!"
"I don't think the rocks are still hot enough," said Chuck.
"So turn on the gas," came the Rhodes.

Chuck looked at Rhodes, slack-jawed.
"Why in hell was I required to build the fire?" he asked.
"I don't know," answered Rhodes, "Where did one unplastic go?"
"I don't know," said Chuck, "I never saw her."
"Do you have the #1?" asked Rhodes.
" 'ere," said Chuck, exhaling.

"I can't keep up with what I think!" cried Desiree.
"I wouldn't recommend turning off your hairnet," said her Mom.
"Grandma!" howled the hillside, "She already did that."
"Baby," Runni said to Desiree, "I didn't no."
"Hey, mom," Rhodes presented, "there's not a child psychologist that can effectively damn you."
"Son," said Snoddi, "effort isn't everything."

Cousin had to mumble, but still connected to the sky, found himself talking backwards: "The horns behind the bull."

Chuck, suffering his own personal epiphany, said, "What KIND-OF people are you?"

#3 said to Silenus, "Did the light suddenly get brighter in there?"
"You're hallucinating," said Silenus.

Manuel's playing got louder.

"Son," sighed Snoddi, "when I told you to keep your crying inside, I overstepped my bounds. Do you hear that music?"
"I know, "dad," & yes," returned Rhodes.
"I don't expect, but hope," said Snoddi, "you'll forgive my ignorance."
" 'Dad'?" came Desiree, "I have a question."
"Let's take a FAMILY vacation!" inserted Runni, brightly.
"What is it, Desiree?" asked Snoddi, giving Runni a meaningful glance.
"Why did you stop talking to me?" asked Desiree.
"I figured out, eventually, that you were handling my mom's X to your satisfaction," answered Snoddi, "& that philosophy wouldn't disturb the course of nature."
"Ah," said Desiree.
"You mean Stallion was only a surrogate?" asked Rhodes. "Then where'd I get THIS?"
"Heh," said Snoddi, "use your eyes, son."
"I've painted us reservations through Brazil," said Runni, "with a nice layover in Rio."
"Can I come?" asked Chuck.
"You'll need to wash off first," answered Runni, "since it appears that you can."

"Kids, we can go now," announced Runni somewhat later.
"Do you think that latch will hold?" asked Snoddi.
She just looked at him.
They all stepped into the painting...
"This can't be Rio," begged Rhodes, but subsided at the music.
The beach began to writhe. "You're outside Stockholm, stranded. We...wanted to talk to you & you left us alone!"
"You weren't alone," asserted Desiree, "You had each other."
"Right," encouraged the groundnet, "we'll go the long way around."
Darkness approached, & Desiree's former hairnet appeared to be sparkling quizzically. Desiree could sense air-to-ground communications from which she was excluded, & prepared to react.
"So, South America?" interrupted Runni.
"Don't hurt me any more than you need to," said Snoddi.

+ + +

Meanwhile, the stallions were unlost in space, regarding their hitch-hiker.
"What do you think we should call him?" asked S2.
"He's your issue," said Stallion, "if you can't decide you should ask him.

"I think I'll call him Bruce," said S2, looking at the pup. "Would you like that, Brucy?"
"Arf," said the pup & paused, "Arf, arf!"
"He'd rather you didn't use the diminutive," Stallion guessed.
"Then Bruce it is!" declared S2.
"Arf!" concurred the puppy.

* * *

"This can't be Rio, Runni," said Snoddi as they stepped into a place more green than brown.
"I don't have time to monitor your diet," she asserted, "It must have been the spinach quiche."
"I don't know how you'd know that if you didn't," said Snoddi.
"Indeed?" said Runni, but then realized & gave him a kiss.
"Kids!" he called to the ones who'd wandered off, "We're going to reconnoiter."
"Fancy word for it, dad!" the twins called back in unison, laughingly.
"I guess I'll set up camp," said Chuck, "until Runni gets her bearings."
"Okay, Manuel," said Desiree, chidingly.
Chuck was puzzled for a moment, then leaned over & kissed her.
Rhodes went looking for firewood.

The Ghost of Igor awoke from a comfortable snooze & started brooding about the disturbance. It had been a sensation unlike the tingly contentment provided by Desiree's former hairnet, at once more stimulating & less directional.
"Oh, wipe that frown off your face," said one unplastic, "As I dissipated, I had an idea. The sparkles implied that you might help me to think."
"More likely than vice-versa," grumbled the Ghost, "Part of my function is external stimulation."
One unplastic was delighted. "Mine too, before the sauna! Now it seems I can't touch anything."
"I'm calling Gymno correspondi," decided t'GoI.
"What good will that do?" asked one unplastic.
"He'll give a cohesive description of the circumstances, anyway," replied the Ghost.

* * *

Silenus was pensive. He nudged his Cousin with his toe. "Where's #3?" he asked.
"Manuel & the dogs are out looking for him," said his Cousin, "I expect them back before my next nap."
"Oh," said Silenus..."Do you have the merman's number?"
"The hairnet does," answered Cousin, "Why?"
"I'm not sure," said Silenus, "Variety?"
"Fair enough," said TACO, requesting the hairnet to put through the call, "What's for breakfast?"
"Toaster strudel & tangerines, until the boys get back."
"Merman on line one," buzzed the hairnet through Cousin's connection.

Bruce couldn't believe his eyes. The Stallions seemed to be merging. He wagged his tail & cocked his head. They seemed to be coalescing! "Arf!" he cheered, & whined in confusion.
S2 knickered, "What's the matter, boy?"
Bruce lacked the words to describe what he was feeling.

+ + +

Snoddi came up for air & decided to climb a little farther up the tree.
"Do you see anything?" asked Runni.
"I see a giant statue on a hill," answered her lover.
"My reckoning wasn't far off, then, was it?" she asked him, ever eager for ever more eager validation.
"Of course you weren't, Runni honey. I didn't doubt you for an instant."

"Hey, I haven't seen you since breakfast," said the merman.
"That's a relative term, isn't it?" asked the satyr.
"Without politics, we're all related, aren't we? ...even with them," rejoined the merman.
"So," said Silenus, "are you gonna come over?"
"Not right now," the merman answered, "I have another date."
"Can't you handle two things at once?"
"Can't you handle many? I'm busy with the kids."
"What are you doing?" assked Silenus.
"Mishandling them, no doubt," said the merman, "I'm the slowest fish in the sea."
"That's where you make your fateful error," opined Silenus.
"That's where I maake my least," said the merman, "I'll be over in fifteen minutes."
"We'll be waiting," said Silenus, broke the connection, & turned to his cousin, "What do you think he meant by that?"
"He meant he presupposes more than you do," said TACO, yawning.

+ + +

LITTLE CROSSES, ON THE HILLSIDE...
LITTLE CROSSES, MADE OF TICKY TACKY

+ + +

The stallions, still separated, regarded the puppy.
"Arf," he said, meaning, "Don't look at me, I'm only along for the ride."
As if they understood, they took off for Brazil...

+ + +

"Can we go somewhere else?" Rhodes was in no mood to brave the slums.
"What are you afraid of?" asked his sister.
"I'm afraid our parents don't know what they've wrought."
"May I say you're not to judge them?"
"You can say whatever you want. I think the ground-net will contradict you."
Desiree humphed & waited.
Rhodes considered, unusually smugly. "You can hear them even now," he told her.
"That you're right, my other, doesn't make me wrong, does it," flatly, as a statement. She knew she'd have to address them eventually. She also knew what Cousin was up to. Since her time sporting the hairnet, she'd had some memory enhancements. What she had had had been plenty.
"I never said you were wrong, sis," -I might have thought it, Rhodes admitted to himself.

"I wonder if she's gonna give me the read-through she-promised," thought Rhodes, "I have my notebook's back."
"Who's that weirdo?" asked Desiree, insensitive.
"Just a part of me," said Rhodes.

- - - -

Manuel & #3 strolled in as if nothing had happened. The chapter on resuscitation had been invigorating.
"Where's the dog food?" asked #3, "The puppies are hungry."
"It's under the sink," answered TACO, pointingly, "Give them a drink first."
Silenus looked on, his thumbs twiddling in his mind.

+ + +

At almost the same time, the stallions & Bruce arrived in Brazil.
Snoddi was overjoyed & embraced them both, enjoying the horsey smell.
Runni was more restrained. "What kept you?" she asked.
"Get your daughter to google it," said S2.
"Be polite!" Stallion demanded.
Runni scratched Bruce's head. He wagged his tail adoringly.
"How did he get here?" she asked of the Horses.
"At first as a cling-on," answered S2, "but I've named him my pet."
"What do you call him?" asked Desiree.
"We decided on Bruce."
"Hey, Brucy!" Desiree blurted.
"Arf!" said the up, signifying it was okay if she called him that.

G-Jangling Contagion took one look at the environment & realized it wasn't his.
"Look at him!" encouraged #3, "He's rarely speechless."
"You poke me like that again," Manuel responded, "& I'll pretend I don't speak English, again."
"Boys!" interjected Silenus, "This man is an honored witness. -You're not tracking very well, are you?" he added to his unexpected guest.
"I had an appointment," said his Glory, "but the trail turned vaporous."
"Man up," suggested Cousin, "IF you like your vapors as you say."
"I never said I liked them," backed the victim, "I said I respected them."
"They do their best work unnoticed," tried the Cousin.

+ + +

"Jeez, he won't even let me call him that," said S2, disappointed.
"Arf arf," said Bruce.
"You're all my puppies," said Desiree.
The sky net digested what she meant & sent an emergency shipment of cedar shavings to her last known address.

+ + +

"Where'd that come from?" asked Silenus.
"Where've you been?" ankh-steered 3-times.
"I should get a day job," inserted Jimbo C.
"Cornhuskers aren't for everyone," said Cousin.

Lazing around, but not too many days into their future, Rhodes suddenly asked, "Left or right?"
"Left," suggested S2, "We can follow the shore."
"Right," followed Snoddi, "It seems it's more level."
"I have an axe," said Chuck.

Runni pulled Desiree aside for a consult.

"My daughter, you look vibrant!" she began.
"Don't fuck with me, mother. You weren't much help when I gave them up, & no help at all with the others. You were in France or Belgium, weren't you?"
"I was in Luxembourg..."
"You think?" finished Desiree, "You weren't even at my birthing pond!"
"I held your hand!" cried Runni.
"My delivery didn't require it," Desiree'd it.
They embraced & Runni said, "Let's go straighten out the boys now, shall we?"
"Easier than pie," admitted Desiree, her mouth watering.

+ - +

"Are you ready?" asked Snoddi, as they stood to face the music.
"Dad," retorted Rhodes, "that it's a hymn doesn't matter."
Snoddi smiled, & they waited, side by side.

- +

"They look pretty, so arranged," said Runni.
"They don't look straight yet," agreed Desiree.

Stallion shook his head. His vision cleared, & he & his other were somewhere else entirely. S2 squeaked. "I couldn't watch," explained Stallion. A muffled whining told them Bruce had felt the same.
"Let's watch a movie!" he said.
"Something with subtitles?" suggested S2, having given up wondering.
"You could read me a story," said Bruce.
"You could read us one, it seems," said S2.
"Dogs have a different metabolism," Bruce admitted.
S2 bolted.
"You'd think he wasn't me, wouldn't you?" Stallion asked Bruce.
"Arf arf," yapped the Bruce, not quite tongue-tied.
"I see," said the Stallion.
"Well enough to get us back?" asked Bruce.
"Without him, I'm slightly cross-eyed," Stallion blushed.
"Without him, I'll never know you," Bruce declared & wagged his tail again.

+ + +

Cousin took the message. "I've gotta go," giving up his position.
"You can't, you're the pivot!" #3 told him.
"Don't worry," soothed Manuel, "because on the next page, Silenus reveals music's not all he can teach."

"Are you down there?" called Geriatric Consumeri, only loudly enough to be heard by his intended in-the-basement audience, remaining unheard above the storm ensuing.
"Just as if I have nothing better to do," quipped the devil.
"May I come down?" JC persisted.
"Let me tidy up a minute."
"Okay," Jello-mold Calculator almost instantly figured the size of the crawlspace complicated by what he'd handled of Satan's use of time.
"How was the Coast Guard?" Satan asked, mischievously reclining, seductively made-up, right near his knees.
"They were fine," replied J.C., recovering his professional aplomb prior prompting, "In fact, some of them were very good," his effect only slightly shaken by his shiver.
"You can edit that, right?" he asked his producer.
"I adore your manly lack of assurance," said his new queen, "Do you want me to turn up the heat?"

"Do you think he's coming?" whispered one unplastic. Her voice was becoming fainter.
"He's giving mixed messages," answered the Ghost, "but he always seems to make his appointments."
"Another massage?"
"Yes, please."
The hairnet hummed.

+++

Genuinely Cross-eyed regarded the devil.
"You've changed your sex," he observed.
"Fuck you," said Satanella, "It's something I can do."
"Granted," came J.C., slipping out.

- - -

"Look, I don't care where we go, except too much," said Rhodes.
"Me, too, neither," said Chuck.
"I do, since that lecture," said Snoddi, "so we'll go straight, following Chuck & his axe."

Desiree looked at Runni, who told her, "Our work is never done."

* * *

"She isn't coming, is she..." said Runni's mother.
"It's hard to say," said her dad, "but I hardly think so. She's probably busy."

They gazed off into the middle distance, imagining what might have been.

+ + +

"You're dissipating, too!" one unplastic accused.
"How could I not?" said the ghost, "I refuse."

@tfp.org

Making slow but steady progress through the bushes, Chuck paused in his swinging. "Am I doing this right?" he wondered aloud.
Those trooping behind him had lost track of their directions, but Desiree had a feeling.
"If we go down, we'll meet my lost ones," she said.
Chuck resumed, using gravity to guide him.

"Hey, kids!" called Runni, using unnecessary motions to negotiate the fallen logs, "Do you remember when we told you to make your own stories?"
"I was busy learning calculation," said Desiree.
"I developed a fondness for animals," said Rhodes.
"& you couldn't share?"
"We didn't know your address," said the twins, "let alone your sad forwarding."
"Snoddi?" begged Runni.
"Paint another place to sleep," he suggested, " they're a lot more you than I."
"Physically, sure," she paused, "but I think they like you better."
"No, darlin"," Snoddi gave her, "Where's Stallion?"
"Should I keep chopping?" asked the new guy.

"You could pretend we're strangers," snorted Stallion, but squinting a bit, "You could pretend you know what brought you here. You could thank me for coming."
S2 was wild-eyed. He recognized his former self, but wasn't willing to address his own implications.
"Will you get on with it?" whined Bruce.
"We will," the horses answered, "if you'll avert your eyes."
"That's MY problem," barked Bruce, "Yours is nothing I haven't seen."
"...Dogs are different, aren't they?" Stallion asked S2.
"They're little-known for their squeamishness," S2 answered.

"Hey!" Bruce says, "I'd deny your assertion, if I thought it was relevant."
"I'd question you, too, but we've been doing it for years," said his tape worm.
Will he, nil he?

He will, having become "overly anxious."

+ + +

"No harm, no foul!" applied Desiree, without thinking.
"Yes, you are," said her mother, "You're thinking what you say is less important than how you meant it."
"No, I'm not!" she not so much as exclaimed as proclaimed suprise.

"That will get you to where I remember starting," said Runni, "your father should know more."
"How could he-did you let him?"
"I tried."

"I'm still trying," grumbled Chuck, swinging his axe wildly, "to understand what you mean by straight." Not being all that good at directions, he was concentrated.

Desiree rested on one of Chuck's stumps.
"Is something wrong, sis?" asked Rhodes.
"I think I'm distracting," she sighed.
"You can still examine your motives?" he asked, hopefully.
"I know what I display," she answered without remorse.

=+-

"Do you think there'll be a problem?" asked Manuel?
#3 checked his book. "Not unless Jukebox Charisma predicts it."
"I can guarantee there will be," said Silenus.
...
"Is he always so negative?" Manuel asked #3.
"No, he's just old," said #3.

Rhodes decided to write his own story.
"She survived her childhood with only scratches & bruises," he began composing in his mind, "but couldn't help pretending her injuries had been more severe. Before very long she concluded her time was more limited than anyone else's & acted it by imagining illnesses. "Do you think I want to feel this way?" she asked her brother, once or twice. "Yes," he told her, "or at least it seems so," as usual careful of her feelings.
Desiree's competence at reading her twin's mind had been improved by the products of her "accidents" with the merman, so she couldn't help grinning as she said, "NICE! But can you write that with a STRAIGHT face?"
"Sis!" Rhodes excaimed, "Does that matter?"
"I've found it...useful, now & again," she said to him.

"It's funny," said Silenus, "you don't know what's been laid down."
"The rules I need are in my book," said #3.
"I like his answers better," said Manuel.
"Fucking primitives!" said Silenus, "I should have known."
The merman interjected, "I live in the sea. My rules might be too clear."
"No," said Silenus, "You don't need to know them."
"Like the others don't need to know themselves?" asked the merman.
Silenus smiled.
The merman blanched, & got out the oil.
#3 & Manuel shared a smile & retreated.

"I don't think we're going to get there, sis," said Rhodes.
"Oh, really?" she told him archly, "& where is "there," exactly?"
"The top of yonder hill," he responded, confused, "but I'm afraid we might get arrested for Chuck's ministrations."
"Oh, bro'!" said Desiree, fondly, "I thought you might still be worried about the slums."
The ground rumbled behind her.
"You lot need to settle down!" she grumbled back.
The statue seemed to move, then did.
As luck would have it, a storm blew up out of nowhere.
"Thanks for the vacation, honey!" said one unplastic.
"Thanks for coming," replied the Ghost of Igor.
"Kids!" called Runni, "What are you doing back there?"
"We're figuring out what's important," they called back.

"You like to say crap like that, don't you?" Desiree challenged, with a wink.
"Yes, I guess I do," said Rhodes, "I thought you knew that."
"Kids!" yelled Runni, "FORMATION!"

They looked at her.
"No, kids, look!" claimed Runni, "The sun is coming up!"
"Was it dark out?" to each other, with a glance. "You're looking through the statue's armpit," said Rhodes to their mother, "At that tilt, it's about 3PM."
Runni had a moment.
"How can you ignore THEM?" Rhodes asked his sister.
"Ignore who?" she asked him back.
"This hillside, that hillside, stranded on beaches worldwide: they're your children, Desiree!"
"Look up, Rhodes. The sky is full of sparkly dirt."
"Dad!" cried Rhodes.
"Son?" answered Snoddi, from his distraction.
"A little moral support?" Rhodes whined & almost growled; a trick he had learned from the puppies.
"I haven't got any," Snoddi truthed.
Rhodes decided, right then & there, to continue with his autobiography.

<<"Well, you see what I was doing?" said Runni.
"Nobody has so far, my dear," Snoddi gave her back.

The nets chose that moment to gang up on their mother.
Their mother did her usual: "IS THERE ANYTHING WRONG WITH ALLOWING YOUR OPINIONS TO SWAY?" she asked them.>>

Jelly-filled Corollaries pretended he didn't hear. "Wtf are you talking about?" he asked.
"Wtf do you mean?" asked Desiree, pretending sweetly, "Why are you even here?"
"I follow the storms," said Jeremiah, Critically.
"Mine is bigger than yours," she said.
"I think you mean "swarms"," he averred.
"You asshole!" she screamed, "Gird your loins!"
A trembling Rhodes didn't know what to do.
"Sis," he cried, "The "storms" Joyfully Communicative follows are bigger than yours."
"You lie! The skynet is only slightly dimmed."
"The skynet, sis? It's up there, but not between us & it. The Ghost of Igor is rescussitating oneunplastic."
"Mom?" Desiree gasped.
"Did you hurt something, dear?" called Runni back, from ahead.
"Rhodes has been writing stories about you!"
"Desiree, darling, I've been listening to the news. We've got to find shelter or we might lose our internet connection. What did your children say?"
"They told me I was a bad mother," softed Desiree.
"I've been told the same," said Runni, patting her own back at the same time as her daughter's.
"Mom, what are you doing? I think I felt your boobs jiggle against mine!"
"Dad?" claimed Rhodes.
"I'd like to complicate the situation," said Stallion, coming in inappropriately, twitching his tail at his other & their other, "We're here!"
"You prove why <3 is an inappropriate symbol for love," Chuck opined.
"I could spank you again," allowed Runni, "You LIKE not even knowing where you are."

---------- Post added at 10:07 AM ---------- Previous post was at 09:50 AM ----------

The sky grumbled, not the skynet.
The statue's urges seemed to be shifting.
"You can't like not knowing WHO you are," persisted Runni.
"You have a mean streak, don't you?" Snoddi asked her, shocked.
"The hamsters," she crooned.
"I ate them," Chuck said, "maybe you can paint something good?"

"He's afraid," said Desiree, "I didn't recognize his scent at first!"
"Mine?" asked the Merman, at the head of the groundnet.
"You never explained your seafoals," Desiree answered back without missing a beat.
"Let's just say we traded," said the Merman.
"Since the group's almost all here," drawled Silenus, having rudely left behind #3 & Manuel, "we can decide who to kill."
"No!" cried Runni & Desiree, who looked at each other in surprise, never having before agreed out loud, even though they both feared the Satyr.
"Yes," said the Satyr, "your votes might count."

"Look at them," rumbled the Ghost.
one unplastic peered over the edge of their cloud. "So?"
"Look again. You're unnatural. They & I are not."
"Oh," she said, puzzled, "but I used to be visible."
"So you will be again, by their actions through your effects, when I dump you," Igor told her.
"BEST VACATION EVER!" she enthused, totally missing the hurt in his eyes.
TGoI looked at her in disbelief & let go.

Their companions on the ground wouldn't feel the effects until later.

- + -

"Yeah, well," said Snoddi, smoking in bed, "to have any conception is only not to have to worry about all your other ones."

"You don't hear me, sis, though you're critical enough. Our saving graces didn't come from your usage."
"Ah," said Desiree, "but your projections aren't productive."
"Yes," admitted Rhodes, "but I'm still hoping."
[Witness Rhodes had some problems disassociating anybody.]
"Are you insane?" his sister countered, "The statue is still going down!"
...Indeed, it now appeared to be around 8.

+ - -

#3 & Manuel were having what passed for tea in the beigeness of the loft.
"This tastes funny," said #3.
"Or as if it should," agreed Manuel.

--+

"Where are you going?" Runni asked Snoddi as he veered off Chuck's path.
"9 or 10, I should think," answered Snoddi, "I'll be back."
"Alrighty, then," she demurred, as oneunplastic's essence poured down.