Planet of the apes

[stevo]

This is the only place this nonsense belongs

Government considers ape rights bill

By: valencialife.net


The socialist PSOE party is apparently intent on introducing a bill aimed at giving apes the same rights as man, "and the immediate inclusion of these animals as people." As a result, the bill adds that apes "should have the same moral and legal protection that humans currently enjoy."

Fernando Sebastian, the bishop of Tudela has termed the measure as "making oneself looking ridiculous in the name of progress, and then what about the rights of the fighting bulls?" Meanwhile, other political commentators have stated that as a result of these measures, it will not be long before apes names will start appearing on the electoral rolls.


Tuesday, April 25, 2006

whaaaaaaaaaaaa????

[maleficent]

if i were a sarcastic kind of person -I might ask what kind of moral protection that we have?

Does this mean, then, that apes will no longer be able to pick at their mates and show their asses when they are displeased as it may spark some sort of sexual harassment suit?

[stevo]

I think it means the spaniards may now fling shit at eachother as a means of communication.

[maleficent]

Originally Posted by stevo

I think it means the spaniards may now fling shit at eachother as a means of communication.

I know people who fling insults as a means of communication - I think flinging shit is a better actually...

[stevo]

it brings up tons of questions, like inter-species dating. If a male chimp takes out a female non-chimp how does the chimp pay for the date? I guess he's got to get a job, which means affirmative action would probably have to apply because there is no way a chimp would get most jobs without it. And what about public urination/defecation? Will the chimps be able to hold it until they find a potty? I guess they'll have to or else they'll get cited. This is interesting. I suppose they would have to pass out rollerskates to all the newly liberated chimps since that and bicycles are their preferred modes of transportation. I'm going to go buy some rollerskate futures now.