Rose McGowan as Red Sonja? To proceed a new Conan film?
 

http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u..._Movie_112.jpg

I've read snippets of news and rumours about a new Conan film. But now I'm hearing about a Red Sonja film that might follow it. (I'll take both!)

The Sonja film was originally going to be released for 2009, but has apparently been postponed until 2010, since the Conan film has been indefinitely suspended.

I hope they work this out because I miss these kinds of films that were popular in the '80s: swords & sorcery. We need a resurgence of this kind of film. No more kids stuff, no more 300 eye candy. Just the straight-up goods. Dark themes, course language, and violence; blood, sweat, and steel....

Has anyone else read anything about these projects?
Anyone else hoping they aren't ruined by current trends in filmmaking?

Chainmail bra = FAIL.

Pinching would make that a less than desirable piece of clothing, yes. Then again, it's partially see through.

Honestly I don't have an opinion about a Red Sonja remake/reboot. All I know is that Brigitte Nielsen scares the living shit out of my penis.

Isn't Rose McGowan kind of short for this role? I've met her and I remember her being a lot shorter than me.

And a chainmail bra does not = Fail... it = hotness. You just need to line it with some leather... mmm leather.

Frankly, I don't think they should touch it. I get the feeling they're ruining a classic with some scrawny bimbo.

At least Brigitte Nielsen was tall and buff enough to be a believable fighter. She kinda turns me on. Mmmmmm.

And they better not even touch the Conan series or I'll answer the riddle of steel after I set fire to their fucking set.

/clutches Arnold DVD collection to chest

Who said Sonja had to be tall or muscular? She just has to be a she-devil with a sword (and in some kind of mail bikini apparatus).

Besides, Schwarzenegger had an entire film career that benefited from favourable camera angles to make him appear taller.





Chainmail bikini.

Rose McGowan can't act but she's hot as hell.

...in a chainmail bikini....

mmmmmm chainmail bikini

Red Sonja a classic? Really? And they already ruined Conan by making Conan The Destroyer. I do agree that sword and sorcery should make a comeback though, as even the worst of those films (Sword And The Sorcerer, Sword Of The Valient, The Deathstalker) were more entertaining then 90% of the crap action flicks that are made now.

+1

Come on people! Bad ass chicks in CHAINMAIL with SWORDS?!?! WTF is wrong with that?

Crompsin you are going to tell me you were not a fan of Heavy Metal the film?

You forgot Dragonslayer.

I didn't think anyone else remembered that film! I loved it as a kid. Cheese and all.

... chainmail bikinis...

+1

Spoiler: You get bonus points for thinking of "chainmail bikini +1, +5 vs. dragons"

You're just feeding my infatuation
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2..._McGowan_1.jpg
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2...gabu_com_3.jpg
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2...e/43903352.jpg
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2...e589096f2c.jpg
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2...oseMcGowan.jpg
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2..._McGowan_4.jpg
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2...se-mcgowan.jpg
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2...mcgowan_15.jpg

This thread wins the "Thread with the most references to chainmail bikini's" award.

chainmail bikini ...




I see what B_G did with the dragons thing but I lost out on those points afterchainmail bikini was mentioned.

Mmm, Red Sonja in a chainmail bikini with a machine-gun leg...

Swords and sorcery? Yes, please. I'm not really a fan of Rose McGowan, though. hmmmm.

Also, wouldn't it make more sense if the bikini was +5 Charisma? :)

If they are going to make a new Conan series, please say it won't be as bad as Scorpion King (a bad Conan rip off if I ever saw one).

If nothing else the posters are cool
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2...nkey/image.jpg
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i2...d-sonja-01.jpg

crap, how can I be as successful and popular as Rose McGowan or Baraka_Guru?

I fail (but the overzealous posts riddled with pictures are indeed pleasing, so they mask my feelings of ineptitude nicely).

Chain mail bikini. Haven't you been paying attention?

The judges would have accepted scalemail bikini as well.

---------- Post added at 10:46 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:33 PM ----------

http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u...promos_001.jpg
http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u...promos_002.jpg http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u...promos_004.jpg
http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u...promos_007.jpg

This thread is like a splinter in my foreskin.

As much as I don't want to see it done, I will watch the final product and gripe like a disappointed Jewish grandmother.

thanks crompie. I didn't have an appropriate analogy at all to portray my sick and twisted mental condition that will force me to see this, even though I know it's going to probably suck ass worse than dungeons and dragons, despite the talents of jeremy irons, and now I have one. :thumbsup:

I live to serve.

Ummmm... I don't think we have talked about this before but....

MO*&ERFU*%ING ROSE MCGOWAN IN A CHAINMAIL BIKINI!!?!?!1111

What part of your genitally says no to this? Don't tell me we have another Cadet Smoothspot in our ranks. My penis says "HIIII HOOOOOO" and off to the movies I go.

if this movie consisted of rose mcgowan doing nothing but parading around in a chainmail bikini while handling weapons, then i'd consider it one of the best of the year, however, we KNOW that there are going to be lines, words, dialogue, and bad acting involved which is most likely going to detract from the awesome sight of steel and skin.

THE HOTNESS OF A SINGLE ACTRESS CANNOT CARRY THE WEIGHT OF A SHIT-FOR-PLOT MOVIE.

I mean, I like "hot babes" as much as the next guy... but if I go to a movie, I want a frickin' story.

Seriously.

Unless it's porn, of course.

I thought that it was a unwritten statement that this was going to be bad, we all know it but we are all going to go see it anyway. It's going to have bad one liners, no plot worth talking about and no acting to speak of. I'm mearly looking at the bright side of The movie, the one thing I'm going to enjoy about spending $10 of my hard earned dollars to watch this flop of a movie. Hot chicks does not a good movie make...

But it does give us something nice to think about as we bash it on the Internet.

...but I wanted it to be a good campy movie like the original.

"Danger is my trade!" and all that. :shy:

One Million Years BC might be the exception to your rule. The plot was atrocious, but it's an incredibly watchable movie simply because of Raquel Welch. Even today, it's something worth watching.

If they ever make a Baywatch movie, I'll be the first in line.

1MYBC is acceptably B-flick awful. It's not like Modern Awful (Transformers 2).

* One Million Years B.C. is also a Misfits song.

racquel is incredibly watchable now.

Hey, I enjoyed "D.O.A." (the silly video game knockoff), and it was little more than an excuse to film hot chicks playing volleyball and some pretty good fight choreography.
http://www.velverse.com/img/2006/sep...ov_doa_top.jpg
A good film? Hardly. Entertaining? Hell yes.

---------- Post added at 11:57 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:55 AM ----------

ka-ching

http://imagecache2.allposters.com/im...ch-Posters.jpg

You know there is no such thing as campy in 21st century. It is either good or bad, there is no campy inbetween. The only time we get a good campy film is if the director goes out of his/her way to MAKE a campy film. 80's films were campy because that's all they could do, they did not know any better.

... If Scifi channel got ahold of it... you might get some campy out of it.

***

I watched this movie the other day:
http://www.reelmovienews.com/images/...er_332x490.jpg

Chris Klein........ Words can not express how *BAD* his acting was, I mean I've seen Elementary School plays about giant pumpkins that had more acting chops than he did.

There was nothing redeemable about this movie, no chainmail, no hot girls, fight scenes sucked. In the 80's, this movie would have been campy, now... it just sucks.

Oh God, that was hideous. Chris Klein is the least threatening tough guy I've ever seen. Made what was already a bad movie nearly unwatchable.

Now if Kristin Kreuk and Moon Bloodgood had slugged it out in chainmail bikinis, it might have been a classic...

I believe that's called "Will Ferrel Syndrome."

As for the O.P., Uma Thurman would have been great for the role.

Okay, why?

I thought Mike Myers did "Coffee Talk" as the Linda Richman (Jewish old lady).

"Talk amongst yourselves."

Because watching each new Will Ferrel film is like a splinter in my foreskin.
As much as I don't want to see it done, I will watch the final product and gripe like a disappointed Jewish grandmother.

I liked this thread better when it was about chainmail bras instead of foreskin :(

^^ Back on topic then ....

... chainmail bikinis ... mmmmm

What part of chainmail were you unclear on?

That'll never work. The midriff's got to be bare on women's armor, how else are you going to give them raspberries?

HA! A breast plate with nipples.

Michael Schumacher would be proud.

Rose could do a great job as Red Sonja! And as far as being too short, umm, wasn't/isn't Sly Stallone real short - but he pulled off Rambo in great style? Just saying.

Yes, Uma Thurman could do it too & well....I think she needs a "Grand Retrun". So who knows?
At any rate chainmail Bra - That Is a Must. In truth, I WANT one too. Perhaps my next visit to the Renaissance Faire next weekend will provide me with my missing piece of fun fantasy wear. (But I'd be better cast as Red Sonja's mom...heheheh!!

In truth, who else has the female strength and killer boobs & acting talent to pull this roll off and well?

Unless, of course we can get Shani Faye or one of her friends to do it?

I think everyone in this thread forgot to mention chainmail bikinis, so here you go:

CHAINMAIL BIKINI!!

I gave you useless chick armor! Be satisfied!

And enhance your calm, John Spartan!

Found this recent tidbit:
Producer Joe Gatta Updates Rodriguez' Red Sonja Movie

Looks like Conan is coming first. But it's nice to know they're going after "real" and "tough" (as opposed to simply eye-candy), but only time will tell, I guess. It's also good that they're "ignoring" the previous film. An origin story could be interesting.

Oh, Jesus... not Conan, my manly respite from the douchey world. Nobody can do it like Arnold. It's impossible. It's unpossible. It's preposterous!

Did Arnold wear a chainmail bikini?

No. His garb with made out of dead dog/wolf skin, if I recall correctly.

That's too bad :(

Wait... did the rescue-me princess in Conan: The Destroyer have a chainmail bra at some point? Can't remember.

Ooh, Olivia D'Abo. No chainmail, but damn I had a crush on her.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v4...via_DAbo_1.jpg

Ditto. First sideboob. *tear*

I LOL'd

---------- Post added at 06:15 AM ---------- Previous post was at 06:12 AM ----------

eh,

http://i180.photobucket.com/albums/x...TripleH012.jpg

would make a good campy conan

The rumour of the day is that Austrian bodybuilder and former Mr. Universe Roland Kickinger is being approached to play Conan. So they'd be trying to hit par for the course. Kickinger has already played some small bits in other films, including having played Arnold Schwarzenegger.

http://www.collider.com/wp-content/i...ckinger_01.jpg


He'd be campy too, I'm sure. I haven't seen him onscreen so I dunno. Maybe the rumours are floating around simply because he's an Austrian bodybuilder and has been onscreen before. *Shrugs* Oh...but apparently he's 5" taller than Arnold, so there's that.

See him act here: http://www.kickinger.com/video/video2.html

He's a better actor than Arnold, that's for sure. Besides, you don't have to be much of a poet to play a barbarian.

I almost did a spit take at my office computer when I read that. Crompsin do you just dig through bad actions movies and know you want to pull them from the grave? Or is a wheel of bad movie quotes and you just spin it when you make a post?

I loved Denis Leary's rants in that movie.

"I want to smoke a Cuban cigar the size of Cincinnati in the non-smoking section. I want to run through the streets naked with green Jell-o all over my body reading Playboy magazine. Why? Because I suddenly might feel the need to, okay, pal? I've SEEN the future. Do you know what it is? It's a 47-year-old virgin sitting around in his beige pajamas, drinking a banana-broccoli shake, singing "I'm an Oscar Meyer Wiener"."

***

Olivia D'Abo was so hot. When I was just a wee little tike, she made me realize happiness could be found in my pants.

***

Shouldn't the actor playing Conan be a *BAD* actor? Do we really want a well spoken Conan? Should he stumble over his lines like a good barbarian/thief mutli-class character? I got a huge sword but I steal things, shouldn't that be all he is? Who needs Int and Chr stats? I want 18/00 STR!

I loved Robert Jordan's Conan books, I got the first three in a huge leather bound book. I liked the way he fleshed the character out, making him smarter, a bit well spoken and sometimes the leader of a small merc group.

Don't know which Conan I would want for a movie, Smart or Dumb Conan.

Well, what does the source material show? Is Conan a dumb brute who merely swings his sword to get the job done, or is he a tactician, a thief, a king of men? "Barbarian" doesn't have to mean "dumb." It can also mean simply crude and warlike.

Do we want a Schwarzenegger do-over? Or a Conan reboot?

I'll take the reboot.

Isn't that just like a man? ;)

And how!

I'm always up for a reboot to the series, I would love to see Conan as a strong-willed, muscular, somewhat honorable and leader of men. I loved him in the series that Robert Jordan wrote. I think it's kind of like Tarzan, in the movies he was a crude savage but in the books (so I've heard) he a man of the jungle but was slightly civilized.

My question is, CAN they do a reboot of Conan and do it right? Will they fuck it up and make him into something that doesn't even resemble Conan in any way, shape, or form. Give me a slightly updated Conan and I'm happy, change everything about him? No fucking way. I'd rather have a dumb, brutish, barbarian that we have all come to love than some sissified, knight in shining armor who saves the day and never does anything wrong.

I know Barbarian isn't one-sided or one dimension, but I don't know if Hollywood does or not.

Lately, there has been a focus on source material with some of these kinds of movies. I wouldn't mind if the writers/director/producers went and read the original stories and some of the comics to create their character and world. The bad movies tend to be the ones where the creators took too much "artistic/creative license," while the rest of us go, "WTF?!"

I say base it mainly on the source material, but have it make sense for film. (Which is always a challenge, btw.)

It could be worse.. It could be in 3D...

Chainmail bikini in 3D? Sounds like a win to me :thumbsup:

It looks like Jason Momoa of Stargate Atlantis fame has been slotted as the next Conan. Coincidentally, he's also been cast to play Kahl Drogo in the upcoming HBO miniseries A Game of Thrones. I plan on seeing both of these.

I'm actually a bit relieved they didn't go the route of talentless bodybuilder as was rumoured. I want to be able to take a Conan reboot quasi-seriously.

http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u.../tfp/JMsga.jpg

Momoa set for 'Conan' - Entertainment News, Players, Media - Variety

Ok, I'm now officially onboard and exited with the new Conan movie.
That looks like my imagination come to life when I read about the Hyborean Age.
Thanks for posting them, Baraka.

Also, was that Mickey Rourke in there?

i dunno..can anyone after Arnold do this movie justice?

id have preferred The Rock. But thats just me. This guy looks way too small to play some sort of warrior. I know brad pitt did ok playing achilles, but i dunno... ill definately go watch it, but im a huge fan of the original Conans..

i love this quote from arnold..

This question is beginning to annoy me. (It's not your fault, dlish.) Arnold's portrayal of Conan was iconic, but it's not gospel. When I think of Conan, I don't first think of Arnold Schwarzenegger, the bodybuilder-cum-wooden-actor. I first think of Robert E. Howard. (If you have to look him up, therein lies a symptom of the problem.)

You prefer the Rock. Jason Momoa looks too small. This is in relation to the Arnold Schwarzenegger portrayal, I assume, because in relation to the original illustrations of Conan, Momoa has a build that most closely resembles the body image of Conan as conceived.

Also, the builds of the likes of Arnold and the Rock aren't really that conducive to ferocious warriors. They're too bulky and favour strength at the expense of agility. Now I know that the Rock is pretty agile for his size, but there are limitations. He often looked clumsy/clunky as the Scorpion King.

Contrary to the Arnold portrayal, the character of Conan is brutal yet agile and intelligent. He is a ferocious warrior but he's also a skilled thief, military commander, and natural leader. He's a fully literate multilinguist.

This means that there is some serious lateral movement that can be taken in his portrayal in a new movie, the first in nearly 30 years I might add.

And watch the original movies again if you haven't seen them in a while. Despite what 9er will tell you, they are yet another indication that the 80s have some serious things to answer for.

who??...

ok that answers your question.

it is interesting that your description of Conan remind me of Ghengis khan and Tamerlane.

I'll only see this if Conan punches out a camel in this installment as well.

I'll be satisfied with flying blood. I want an R rating. ;)

* * * * *

For those who are interested, there apparently are few details on the story in the 2011 Conan film, but it's been said that Paradox Entertainment is concerned about being close to the original Robert E. Howard material in hopes of producing future films based on it.

Below is from Wikipedia regarding the original Schwarzenegger Conan the Barbarian and its relation to the original Howard stories:
Conan the Barbarian (1982 film) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Regarding Red Sonja... I could care less. I am not a fan of Rose McGowan or of Red Sonja... but Conan is another matter entirely.

I am a big fan of the original Conan but this new one looks like it could be a case of The Dark Knight stacked against Tim Burton's Batman. Updated and kicking some major ass.

Can't wait for this.

I don't know where you saw Mickey Rourke, but it was probably Ron Perlman.

I just have a thing for warrior women, especially with mail bikinis.

I really, really hope this is the case. I'm begging the gods that this doesn't suck. The visuals are there at least.

If they get Rose McGowan to punch a camel in Red Sonja, I'm totally in.

Actually, if they get her to punch a camel in real life I will become her biggest fan. ;)

^Seconded. Every word.

hawt

Anyone who's interested in geeking out until the lead up to the movie, Funcom has announced that their Age of Conan MMO is now a hybrid subscription game with a free-to-play option, like Turbine did with Lord of the Rings Online.

I briefly tried a trial of this game, but now I'm going to check it out again since I don't have to pay anything if I don't want to.

Age of Conan is going free to play! | PC Gamer

Oh, and this:

Age Of Conan: Hyborian Adventures

http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u.../conan-mtv.jpghttp://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u...-tamara-pp.jpghttp://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u...arbarian_5.jpg
http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u...posterfull.jpghttp://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u...rique-rose.jpg

Also, some good news:

Conan the Barbarian (2011 Movie): How graphic is the sex and violence in Conan the Barbarian? - Quora

Red Band Trailer Released
 

The trailer we've all been waiting for:

Conan the Barbarian in 3D - Red Band Trailer Video - IGN


This is so rated R (thank God).