I need some advice. - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

lillala · 08-01-2005, 06:08 PM

no longer an issue...edited

Sage · 08-01-2005, 06:33 PM

Alrighty- "feels really strongly about her" how? As in, he's still in love with her? Still thinks about her a lot? Still has feelings for her? If she's not out of the picture, there's no way you can fully be in the picture for him (catch my drift?) It sounds like you and your BF need to sit down and Talk about this, and about how you feel. If you are even THINKING of getting married you need to realize that a good 85% of marriage is communication- so talk about how you feel. If he says anything you don't like, find out why he's thinking that way, and what (if anything) you can do about it.

lillala · 08-01-2005, 06:38 PM

No I didn't write that right. I don't think he still has feelings for her but I have also been in the position of breaking up with someone when they were gone and found I still had feelings for them when they came back.

Sugar&Spice · 08-01-2005, 08:03 PM

Talk to your boyfriend about how you feel. What he has to say may reassure you. However, I think you will just have to wait and see how things turn out when she gets back.

I know what you mean by feeling jealous. But, you have to realize that how he felt for her is different then what he feels for you now. You cannot feel the exact same way about two different people. Relationships will always be unique. There are elements of your relationship that theirs didn't have.

lillala · 08-01-2005, 08:20 PM

thanks for your help!

ShaniFaye · 08-02-2005, 03:00 AM

I was in a LD relationship for 3 years with a man in New Zealand (cant get much more LD than that lol). When we finally decided to call it quits it was kind of messy...but in the 2 1/2 years its been since we broke up we have found we are still really close and are way better friends than we were a "couple". Dave knows that Mike and I still talk, exchange emails etc. While my feelings are still strong for him, they are strong in a different way and Dave has no problem with it at all.

Depending on what your b/f says about it, you might just accept that while the love isnt there the way it once was, it doesnt mean that he might not still be concerned/care about her. Its kinda hard for that to just go away. As long as his main focus is you when it needs to be then I say just go with the flow.

08-01-2005, 06:08 PM	#1 (permalink)
lillala Upright Location: Thousand Oaks, CA	I need some advice. no longer an issue...edited Last edited by lillala; 08-23-2005 at 06:50 PM..

08-01-2005, 06:33 PM	#2 (permalink)
Sage hoarding all the big girl panties since 2005 Location: North side	Alrighty- "feels really strongly about her" how? As in, he's still in love with her? Still thinks about her a lot? Still has feelings for her? If she's not out of the picture, there's no way you can fully be in the picture for him (catch my drift?) It sounds like you and your BF need to sit down and Talk about this, and about how you feel. If you are even THINKING of getting married you need to realize that a good 85% of marriage is communication- so talk about how you feel. If he says anything you don't like, find out why he's thinking that way, and what (if anything) you can do about it. __________________ Sage knows our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's She answers hard acrostics, has a pretty taste for paradox She quotes in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus In conics she can floor peculiarities parabolous -C'hi

08-01-2005, 08:03 PM	#4 (permalink)
Sugar&Spice Psycho	Talk to your boyfriend about how you feel. What he has to say may reassure you. However, I think you will just have to wait and see how things turn out when she gets back. I know what you mean by feeling jealous. But, you have to realize that how he felt for her is different then what he feels for you now. You cannot feel the exact same way about two different people. Relationships will always be unique. There are elements of your relationship that theirs didn't have. __________________ -Speak your mind even if your voice shakes

08-02-2005, 03:00 AM	#6 (permalink)
ShaniFaye Submit to me, you know you want to Location: Lilburn, Ga	I was in a LD relationship for 3 years with a man in New Zealand (cant get much more LD than that lol). When we finally decided to call it quits it was kind of messy...but in the 2 1/2 years its been since we broke up we have found we are still really close and are way better friends than we were a "couple". Dave knows that Mike and I still talk, exchange emails etc. While my feelings are still strong for him, they are strong in a different way and Dave has no problem with it at all. Depending on what your b/f says about it, you might just accept that while the love isnt there the way it once was, it doesnt mean that he might not still be concerned/care about her. Its kinda hard for that to just go away. As long as his main focus is you when it needs to be then I say just go with the flow. __________________ *I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!*

08-01-2005, 06:38 PM	#3 (permalink)
lillala Upright Location: Thousand Oaks, CA	No I didn't write that right. I don't think he still has feelings for her but I have also been in the position of breaking up with someone when they were gone and found I still had feelings for them when they came back.

08-01-2005, 08:20 PM	#5 (permalink)
lillala Upright Location: Thousand Oaks, CA	thanks for your help!