Anal Sex
 

So my boyfriend wants to try anal. I'm up for it but I was wondering if any of the ladies in here have tried it. Did you enjoy it? Can you orgasm from it? I'm kind of nervous about it and I'm trying not to be, as I know that could make it more difficult. Anything you ladies have to say would be awesome. Thanks!

...a fairly thoroughly discussed topic in the Sexuality Forum...

Here are your search results.

For the moment, I suppose I will leave this thread open..we'll see if any new information shows up ;)

The link goes nowhere for me.

Anal sex is a good experience between two lovers who are very comfortable with themselves. You need lube and a long time. And make sure you have stuff to clean up with. OH! And take a poopoo before you try it. ;)

LPM, you always have a way of getting right into the nitty gritty of shit in the weirdest way *chuckle* Makes me laugh though :)


Definately ensure you have lube, for me it's a frame of mind thing, i have to really really be in the mood for it, otherwise it's forcing and jeebus knows that's not comfortable. May the force be with you, but not too hard ;)

It is an interesting feeling. fallenangel is right, if you're not in the mood for it it is extremely uncomfortable and that could ruin all anal sex from thereafter. If you want, drink a little first to loosen up or maybe even a muscle relaxant if you've got it.

http://www.sexuality.org/l/incoming/aanal.html

I found this link incredibly useful when I was curious about the right way do it.

Hope it helps.

Yeah....seems to be a vB3 thing, we're looking into that.

Anyways...one bit of advise is to use good lube.

Lube, and lots of it, is necessary..and all I've tried is astroglide, which is perhaps not that great for it. Gets sticky, and stings.

I hear silicone lubes are well suited for anal.

:)

Cetafil lotion is the best thing we've found for it. Lot's of lubes sting, and the sticky ones are annoying too. Any of the water/sugar based ones get sticky and usually sting.

I'd like to highly recommend dildos and toys in general for anal. For me, I'd rather work a dildo in before a finger, even. Something about it being plastic, because for me, a finger stings for some reason, but a dildo can be worked hard and fast and feels wonderful. I’m not really into butt plugs, because for me, it has to be going in and out, and butt plugs more just sit there.

A great position for this is on your hands (elbows) and knees, with your butt up in the air. You have good access to reach around and rub your clit while your partner works you from behind. (hehehe) You would not believe the orgasms you’ll get from this position and self-stimulation, simultaneously.

LPM has some great advice. Don't try anal if you are not clean inside. I honestly recommend enemas because of this reason, but if you are not used to this kind of stimulation yet, just make sure you've had a good movement first. :D

Thanks for everything you guys have told me. It makes a bit less nervous to know that women CAN recieve pleasure from anal. We've got lube and are gonna try something tonight or tomorrow. Again, thanks alot.

Good Luck :)

One more advise - I find that it helps, stress-wise, to keep the definition of 'success' relatively generous.
Give it a try, do your best, and be perfectly accepting of that it will work out the best it can for that time, ... and there's always chances to try it again :)

One thing I've learned that seems to be a key for me is PATIENCE. Especially for hubby. The less patient either one of you are the more tense you will be and the more unpleasant it can feel. If you are completely relaxed and patient to play with each other it can feel good.

i use this heavy duty pent house lube (that's what it says on the container..) it's oil based, i believe and doesn't sting. i figure it's not that bad for me.. there's natural ingredients like bees wax in there.

As an update, we tried it tonight and it didn't go so well. He tried just going in with his penis first, but got no where with that, then tried a finger. That worked a bit. He never got fully in, and it hurt really badly. Way more pain than I was expecting. Does anyone know of anything that we could do to not make it hurt quite so bad? He was going VERY slowly, but it still hurt like a bitch. He didn't get more than maybe a centimeter or two in and I'm hurting right now. Thanks ladies.

Sorry to hear that you didn't enjoy your first experience, but I think its not all that uncommon the first time. It's probably just because you were nervous, and very tense. When you tense up, your butt tightens up and then it starts to hurt, then you tense up more, and you get no where. Next time, if you can just relax, and don't try to rush anything, it may go better. Have him start with his finger next time. It may take a couple of times with just fingers before you are ready for his penis. A small slim vibrator works well, too (in fact, that can be fun while you are having regular sex, to slide a vibrator or his lubed finger in). Good luck next time, don't rush, and relax...

You REALLY have to use a LOT of lube. A ton. I mean, put lube on a finger and slide it in. Put it everywhere. And like 'Awanderingsoul' said, you need to be loosened up. Try not to tense up.

You have to be completely relaxed, and he has to go really really reallly really s l o w. It has to be worked with, and it would help if you were aroused and stimulating yourself, but mainly, relaxed.

Both of you need to understand that it takes time... I suggest toys. Go to the local porn store and pick yourself up a "beginners anal kit" seriously. Give it time, and yes, lots of lube. Try Cetaphil. It's not a sex lube, it's a sensitive skin lotion, but it works well. Use it liberally.

Personally, I loved it the first time, but I was so super horny when we did it, and it was explosions of ecstasy.

Start small. The first time for me hurt a lot too. We really don't do that much anal play. I have played alone when I could experiment with what feels good at TOTALLY my own pace. a small vibrator does feel good. The vibration makes a big difference - just don't let go. ;) Also if you started out with his penis and it hurt then I could just about guarantee that you got tensed up which would make it hurt even more.

Well for me my husband we have attempted it a couple times, but I just can't seem to relax enough. I get turned on when he teases me back there with a small anal toy or sometimes a finger, but when it comes to him I just tense up to much and it just doesn't happen.
We've got an anal set, that starts really small to get yourself used to it, then there are two other sizes. The biggest just a little smaller than my husband, and his advice is maybe I could try those by myself and there would be no pressure and i could eventually get to the biggest size, and eventually him. So we'll see how that works i guess.

anal is the best.
 

For me anal sex was uncomfortable at first, but now to be honest I prefer it to vaginal sex. I have a better orgasm with anal. I say give it a try. And for me its never messy, its the greatest. Hey you never know whats good till you try it. :thumbsup:

Well, we tried it again a few nights ago. He was able to get all the way in, but oh dear Lord, it hurt. I recommened the next time we try just a finger or something, and so that's what we're gonna do. And also get a bit of hard alcohol in me.

I like to have a bit of alcohol in me to help loosen up. Also, I think it helps when we do it in the missionary position. I feel as though I have more control over how hard he thrusts. Make sure you have a lot of lube inside of you before you even start. We tried one time and didn't have enough lube and it hurt so bad I was really scared to try it again. We tried it again about two weeks ago and everything went smoothly. Good luck.

You are brave to keep trying, and I hope you both will be rewarded when it all comes together for you. It may take a few tries for it to become truly pleasureable, but boy, can it be worth it! Keep us posted!

If you're trusting your partener then go for it. It's a wonderful experience.
You will have an realy powerful orgasn

We haven't done that yet, but I am suprised I have gone as far as we have so far. It is uncomfortable at first, he just lubes it and fingers the hole before and during sex- and it really intensifies the experience and the orgasm.

it might help relax you a little bit if you try touching yourself while he goes in slowly with a well lubed finger, because then you'll focus more on pleasuring yourself, and as long as he goes nice and easy, it might work a bit better that way?

With my boyfriend, it's one of those, "the last girl I was with loved anal" things with me. I don't care, I've done it once with my ex in the shower and HATED it. I thought I would give it another chance, but that just confirmed my dislike of anal. So no more for me!

Bless your heart.
I tried it twice. I dont remember if there was tons of lube, but i do remember it being really painful both times (and the guy I tried it w/ wasn't very "girthy".. at all). I'm so surprised I was brave enough to try it a second time. I'm very scared to try it w/ my fiance. :| I wish I was as brave as you are. I trust my fiance, but I just keep thinking It'll be very painful. . and it's probably because that's all I know.

Don't know if your question's been answered, but here's my two cents:
http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum2/HTML/005853.html

It's my favourite sex health board, and the members are actually helpful instead of intimidating :)

We tried again a few nights ago and he got farther in than before, but still, it just hurt so badly. I really want this to work because I've heard from multiple people how good it feels after the first few times. We've now tried 3 times and he still hasn't gotten all the way in. Are we not doing something right?

For the next three times you are making love, just have him use his well-lube finger. Try it with you on top, and have him finger your ass while you are making love to him. It's apparent that you are not ready for his penis, so just try to get used to the pleasurable feelings. Remember, there's no hurry!

Before you give up. Take it from someone that definitly didn't like anal, it can be over come. Try to lubricate a dildo and insert it in the rectum at your own pace. Once it's in leave it there until your relaxed (15min). This will just stretch the sphincter. It should go well after that, it did for me. something I also discovered doing this was vaginal intercourse is even better with a dildo in the rectum. It makes him seem even bigger. It's very nice. Once you break it in, it's like having a second vagina. It's nice to have a spare.:)

You know what helps it feel good?!
Spit.
Yes, that's right- spit. Usually it hurts or burns for nwlinkvxd to get inside my bumhole, but when he tried rubbing his spit into it and on his penis...it totally felt good.
Try it.

Spit huh? I will definatly keep that in mind and am looking into getting a dildo to help move things along. Thanks ladies!

You might want to keep in mind that turnabout is fair play, too. Since you are going through all this effort, maybe he should know what it feels like, too. Get a strap-on, and then you can fuck him! Believe me, it can be quite an experience.

Euuhhh, personally I wouldn't want to do that and I get fucked in the bottom. Sounds like a turn-off.

I think I'm going to have to agree with la petite moi on this one. I'm going through the effort because this is really the only thing he's brought up that he wants me to do. I've asked him to try quite a few diffrent things and he's done all willingly, so I want to do this for him. If I didn't, I wouldn't be trying it.

patience sweetie! Bear in mind that your exit hole is not designed for sex so it'll take a while before it gets enlarged enough for it.

it took loverboy and me like 4 or 5 times before he could get all the way in so it takes a few attempts before it'll work. So.. use lube and I recommend that you try fucking him instead and taking control over the pace. Personally I think it's easier for loverboy to penetrate me if we do it while lying down - me on my stomach and him on top of me. Either that or when we're both upright on our knees. This way I can take control over the pace AND play with myself at the same time. Masturbation takes away the weird feeling the penetration sometimes causes, it'll relax you and make it enjoyable for you :)

This may have already been mentioned (I didn't have time to look at ALL the posts) but what is extremely less painful for me is if we have anal sex while in the spooning position. We have tried it other ways as well (like doggiestyle or me on top like you might see in porns) but trust me, on the side in a spoon is fantastic and practically painless. Oh yea, and LOTS of lube...astroglide is the best if you use lots of it. I've never had a problem with it getting sticky or drying up too soon and it washes off easily enough.

Patience is surely the key. You want it so bad now, that when it doesn't happen, you get frustrated and so you tense up. Becomes a vicious circle. I have found, at a TOY party, a product called anal ease. It has some sort of numbing agent in it to help EASE the discomfort. But as everyone else says, TONS of lube and lots of foreplay...you're on the right track and yes, I've had one of the greatest orgasms ever with anal. It's sure worth the effort.

Aphrodite, I would highly recommend smallish dildos. When we tried anal sex, it wasn't bad, but I need more "practice." So, I have been practicing. :D I start with a very small vibrator.....about 4 1/2" long, 3 3/4" around. Lots of lube, obviously. I've been able to quickly work up to the the 5 1/2" vibrator - with comfort. Eventually, I hope to be able to take my husband all the way without any problems. This may require using one or two toys right before he tries to enter in order to loosen me up. Perhaps that approach would work for you as well. Again, practice alone for a bit with smaller toys to get used to the feeling.