Gentlemenly Advances...
 

So, Ladies, I was having a discussion and it came up of how a Lady, such as ourselves, prefers to have a Gentleman indicate his interest in a member of the fairer sex...
To avoid the whole Winnie Cooper "Do you 'like-him like him?" or "do you just like him, like him?" question, what has worked for you in the past or what would you like to see in the future? This goes for the "taken" ladies as well... what does your man (or woman) do that reminds you that you're important to him/her?

Not Worked:
~"Hey baby, is that a bottle of Windex in your pants, 'cause I can sure see me in them."
~Flowers. Nice gesture, but they die. I like plants.
~"Um, if you're waiting for The One, I'm not him, but if you wanna fuck...?" (seriously, this was the short Italian-straight-off-the-boat dude)
~The whole smelling my underwear thing... the clean ones in the drawer, but still. NOT COOL.

Worked:
~Conversation, actually. About something I was interested in and had mentioned, so he looked up more information so we could discuss it.
~Coffee. I love it. And he went out and found some that he thought I'd like.
~A camera, a crockpot... he paid attention to things that I enjoyed doing and wanted me to keep at it.
~A little note every once-in-a-while, when he was thinking of me.

Would work in the future:
~Plants
~Conversation
~I love those weird postcards from off beat stores, like the trailer park signs and stuff.
~Just a note to say hi. I like to get things in the mail.
~Buy me a drink. Pay attention to what I'm drinking and offer to buy me one. And let me buy you one as well if I so choose.

So, let's hear it.... what could He do to let You know he's interested or still interested?

Dave and I will be together 6 years in a few weeks. He still does things (well, to be fair we both do) that just make me tear up and think how lucky I am and its nothing all that "big"

Things like, buying me beef jerky if he's run to the store for something for him (you can change that to include a reeses, cherry coke etc, since I cant have those things all that often now, its really more meaningful now that he pays attention to how long its been since I've had something like that). He leaves me a card on my pillow, or a sticky note in the bathroom telling me things like how much he appreciates me or loves me. He buys me things that last, he doesnt waste money on flowers that will die. He turns off the tv and says he'd just like to talk WITH me. If he has to run an errand for work he stops at my office just to give me a kiss and a hug. He tells me I'm beautiful even if its one of those Saturday's where I havent showered and stayed in my night clothes all day.

*sigh* I could go on all day, but I'm sure you get the idea

I'm sleepy. The answer that I want to give will make little-to-no sense.
When he catches that evasive fluffy thing for me and sets it gingerly in my arms so I can enjoy petting it as I fall asleep. Successful Cinnabunny hunts are a thumbs-up in my book. See? no sense at all. That was such a delightful thread starter - so fabulous, honestly. Thought-out and carefully worded. Even with those cute little ~ things. Then here I am ruining it by blathering about being handed a cuddling rabbit.

Ok, ok - so now that I've blathered I'll give you a productive answer.
I enjoy being with men that I've gotten to know well. Preferably men I have known for several years. I'm a big fan of trust. So my advice is more about bumping up from friendship to lover.
- giving me a potted red rose as a birthday gift
- asking me out for tea
- picking up a pint of my favorite flavor of ice cream along with his beer.
- mailing me messages written in code (preferably a new code for me to decipher)
- inviting me out for ice cream and a chick flick or documentary (I know they can't be that interested in it, but they know what makes me tick!)
- offering to drive me home when I expected to take the bus
- offering to teach me how to fly a kite
- inviting me to a little-known lecture given by a visiting professor
- telling me about a nearby waterfall or otherwise delightful hiking trail
- asking me if I want to go for a run, then remaining at my pace for the entire run
- venturing over from the business building to the botany building to "accidentally" catch me in the hall after my students have left office hours to ask a pointless biology question as an excuse to spend time with me

Things that most likely won't work:
- asking me out for a drink
- asking me out for something that costs them or me money
- bringing up an academic-based conversation while assuming that I study English or something equally insulting for a woman in the sciences
- telling me I'm pretty in a way that makes it sound like they never noticed previously
- asking me out the day after meeting me, assuming we haven't been forced to spend copious amounts of time working together
- gawking at me when I tell them what I study (any sort of surprise or a flurry of ignorant questions about my research will only make me want to puke)