Sales dicks
 

Mrs. Clavus an I have been shopping for a few high-ticket items lately, and I am utterly amazed at the way salesmen (yes, they have all been men) treat my wife. What the fuck is up with this?

Attention salespeople of the world:

If you wish to sell your wares to my household, I strongly suggest you take note of the following guidelines:

Do not insist on speaking with “the man of the house.” My wife is fully capable of making decisions, even decisions involving (gasp!) money. If you don’t want to deal with my wife, I don’t want to deal with you.

If you are invited into our home to make your pitch, do not treat my wife like your personal servant. Rattling the ice in your glass in her direction to indicate that you would like more water will not endear you to anybody making a purchasing decision.

Do not treat my wife like she is stupid. She is, in fact, smarter than you are. If you don’t believe me, let me ask you something – Who has figured out how to enjoy her house in the afternoon, free from the burdens of employment; and who is sweating it out in a suit? How many college degrees do you have…three? Are you fluent in a couple of languages? No? Then YOU are the stupid one, stupid.

Do not belittle women during your pitch. Your effort to sell the Dodge over the Ford failed miserably when puked out this line – “No offense, but Ford is a girl’s truck.” Hey dipshit, the truck is FOR the girl.

If my wife starts busting your balls, do not attempt impromptu male-bonding with me. You won’t go around her by giving me a knowing smirk, rolling your eyes and saying “women!” Who’s side do you think I’m going to take – the beautiful woman who may give me red-hot monkey-woowoo, or the polyester-clad salesguy?

Don’t pitch me. Pitch HER. Sure, I write the checks, but I write them for things SHE wants. Either treat her with respect, or shut your noise-tube, shit-weasel.

Hehe, what a great post. And oh so true.

Great post clavus. Thanks for taking a stand! :)

That was a great line.

Those guys really need to learn that marrige is a partnership.

You're a good man/father/husband Clavus, very good. :thumbsup:

Those are some TERRIBLE salespeople you describe. One reason for this is likely the turnover rate. I know that, at least when it comes to auto dealers, most salespeople only last for on average 3 months at any one dealership - not long enough to actually know what they're talking about with the car. Ask every sales person you deal with how long they have been there. A suggestion I'd make is when you call the dealer to make an appointment (ALWAYS go in with an appointment), tell the receptionist that you speak to that you want to work with the most experienced and nicest sales rep they have. Most of the time the receptionist is not biased and you'll end up with a much better experience with these people.

As far as the bad sales erpresentatives that you've worked with, I'd let the management at those dealers know about them and know exactly that it cost them a car sale and could cost them more. Chances are, those people won't be working at the dealership much longer afterwards ;)

Excellent post there, mate.

Being a single gal, I do all my hustling myself, but what ticks ME off is when I am in a shop with my 10 year old daughter and she is ignored by sales people when trying to make purchases herself. She stands at the counter with her purchase and her money (all in the name of assisting her to be an independent person) and the sales lackey looks right over her head at me. Even when she asks them questions, they answer me instead of her. Sure, she is only 10, but she's a consumer with money to spend, and she deserves respect!

I couldn't imagine acting in such a downright bizarre way in this day and age.

:crazy: "..man of the house..." :crazy:

My wife doesn't stand for any of that. Any salesman who dared treat her in the manner you describe above would soon have a choice of orifices from which to perform his next defecation.

You'd think that mentality would be gone... I haven't bought a car recently, but I did go looking for new furniture -- and was pretty much ignored in the furniture store (couples were not ignored) When I did wander to the counter for some help, I was asked if my husband would be joining me... I promptly left the store after delivering a piece of my mind.

Gold star for you Clavus -- I hope you got lots and lots of red hot monkey woowoo... You deserve it!

good post but very vulgar.. i think that you should tone down on the vulgarity so you don't bring yourself down to their level, you can definately make your voice heard by making good points without the vulgarity.

Rock on, dude! My wife and I decide things toGEther. And I walk all over the bastards that can't see that.

I work in sales/customer service type job, the people you were dealing with are complete idiots. You have to cater to whoever you are selling to; be it a couple, group, or single male or female. Personally, I prefer working with couples. I can build off the positives from both of them towards selling what I have. :)

Sales is the bastion of the damned. After working in sales for 4 years I would rather clean out the sewers of New York with my tongue than go into sales again. Never been in a field that actively encouraged being deceitful and rude in order to make a buck. Good for you for standing up to the evil sales people. The second somebody tries to "sell" me on something I leave even if they are being nice. I'll decide for myself thank you and when people start demanding better treatment at the hands of sales people the sooner slime balls like that will be out of a job. Sales people should be informative IMO and that's it. Anything else is an insult to the customer.

I can't believe Sales people like this still exist. I know most cliches are based in fact, but I would have hoped this kind of nonesense was long gone.

When Mrs Mephisto and I bought our two cars, we obviously wanted different things. I went for the big red, powerful "grunt car", with a growling engine and a BHP large enough to drag mour house off its foundations. Rather impractical for the 14km commute through city-traffic it was to be used for, but rather gratifying for my shallow male pride and posturing. The Sales guy who dealt with us was perfect. Friendly, knowledgable and helpful. He knew I was the buyer, but he also knew that I could buy anything without my wife's permission either! So, whilst he dealt with me, he was also friendly to Mrs Mephisto and even made the odd joke at my expense.

Later the same week, when we went to buy Mrs Mephisto her car, we had almost the same experience but with the genders reversed. I sat there quietly and politely, listening as the Sales woman gave her pitch to my wife (not me). I simply chimed in once in a while to ask a question and make a joke (don't look at me, it's her car! etc). The experience was very pleasant for both of us, and the car was "sold" to Mrs Mephisto within a few minutes.

The moral of the story? Same as Clavus, but for the opposite reasons.

If you want to sell to someone,

A) Don't be an asshole
or
B) Be nice and listen to their needs
or
C)Both of the above


Mr Mephisto

If I had a wife, and a house, and we were looking to purchase things and the salesman rattled his ice at my wife (that I don't have)...

Thats it. End of meeting. Goodbye. I will be purchasing from your biggest competitor just to spite you, and will likely inform your superiors of such.

Haha, shit-weasel.

Unfortunately, a lot of people are in sales because everything else they can do pays minimum wage. These people either don't stay in sales long, or succeed by being crooked or deceitful.

I don't want to denigrate the great salespeople who know their products and are there to make the best fit between customer and product. I bought shoes today from an incredibly knowledgeable shoe salesmen who saw some problems in my walk and recommended a pair of shoes that is actually relieving much of my chronic back pain. Okay, they cost real money, but I feel that she did me a favor.

My wife and I have faced this situation a number of times. In most cases, we walked away from the sales person and returned a different time. If the same person came back, we asked for someone else.

My wife is also very intelligent and as a couple, we make all decisions together. If someone is unwilling to treat us as equals, they don't get our sale.

Thank you for your input. But rest assured, I have a large vocabulary and I choose every word very fucking carefully.

Another reason car dealers sicken me.

Matter of fact, so do new cars- it's hard to imagine a worse investment.

I have no problem ignoring them as I drive by in my "beauty-of-capitalism" used wonder-car.

Clav, you think you have it bad?

This past summer me and my SO both came down with MRSA. If your nat familiar, it is a strain of staph that cannot be treated by anything but a select few antibiotics. Let's put it in perspective, you can't be in the same room as an aids patient or anyone under 10 or over 70 if you have it in the hospital waiting room.

The strong antibiotics cuased my SO to bleed vaginally. Additionally, a chunk of rotten flesh the size of a gold ball in diameter fell out of her buttocks tissue and left a gaping abcess in her skin.

When I took her to the hospital, the doctor walked in the room, looked at me standing next to her and asked me what was wrong with her. She's on the table fully awake and he asks me.
I told him what we where diagnosed with and he told us that we shouldn't tell a doctor what we have, that's his job to determine.
Then he looked at me and asked me to describe her symptoms. I resisted the smart ass remarke and gave him a run down. By this time she was seriously pissed that she was sitting right there and he was speaking as if she wasn't in the room.
He told us the abcess was probably from a bug bite, that our cultures must be mistaken, and then he laid down the bomb. He told me we should start using condoms and she's probably bleeding becuase she doesn't realize she's pregnant. I looked at him, blinked, and told him we do use protection. Then he looked at me and told me we proably had an accident.
I smiled weakly at him, inquired if they had an OBGYN who was femaile who could make a profesional call on the subject, and he responded that the hospital did not employ any female OBGYN's. By this time he had not even looked at her in the eyes yet.
I just handed him the CDC printout regarding our antibiotic showing that vaginal bleeding was a side effect and to see a doctor if it occurs.

It just amazed me that a doctor could speak about a patient as if they weren't in the room and aware of what was happening. he must have thought I was the man in the relationship, so I would have the answers.

That'll teach me to go to a Hospital in Georgia.

I went to my local hardware store (i wont mention names) with my husband once. We were looking for cement screws. Now that's logical; does everybody get that? Cement Screws. Screws that will penetrate cement, right? Well, I asked the dip-shit floorman where I could find cement screws and he made it all difficult, like he didn't understand what I was talking about and he paused with a confused look on his face. My husband said "Cement" (pause) "screws". And wouldn't you know it...he understood what we were needing because my husband said it. That's honestly the first time I experienced the whole gender-shovanist thing...

Maybe if you had said "concrete screws" things would have gone a little smoother...

shit weasel.... rofl, all i gotta say, nice post

Yea, I was clapping at that point, too. :thumbsup:

I'd have made the salesman leave if this happened. Did the salesman really do this? That's incredible.

Oh, and requesting permission to use Shit-Weasel.

-Lasereth

Ya, it really happened. I wasn't there at the time, or the fine folks from Sears would have been out the door. Mrs. Clavus is a bit more patient than I am.

Please, use "shit-weasel" any time you want. It does not belong to me. It belongs to the world.

My name is water_boy and I'm a salesperson. (crowd: "Hi water_boy")

I do get these types of salespeople from time to time. I promptly tell them not to talk to me as if they were reading from a script. Talk to me like they actually know about the product they are selling. I also tell them to knock off the sales tactics, the pitch lines, etc.....I tend to think I am a fairly educated individual and take time to research the product I am about to purchase. When I know more that the salesperson, I typicall ignore them and make the purchase without them.

I'm right there with you brutha! We had a roofer give us an estimate on our house. The guy looked around up top and came down to talk to us and explain what we needed, etc. He would talk a bit and my wife would ask a question and he would answer it to me. He never stopped looking at me. She would ask another question and again he would answer to me. He never directly spoke to her and when we were done gave the estimate to me. Never even acknowledged her existence. She was the one that called him in the first place! Guess what pal, my WIFE has the money. She doubles my salary. My WIFE is good with tools and knows all the construction jargon. Me, I can't hammer a nail. I can quote Shakespeare all day long but I don't know the first thing about construction. Handy around the home I am not! We both found it really strange that someone pitching their service could be so oblivious. Needless to say, the wife wasn't amused and we will be getting a different roofer.

My wife is a MD and a Masters in Stats. She makes twice what I do. She has the brains and the bucks you want to sell to us you better be selling to her. We lived in the soulth for 5 years and had no time for sales people who treated her poorly.