Ideal Number of Children to have?
 

My girlfriend and I were talking about this and we both agreed on two- because an only child wont have a sibling to play with, three would leave a middle child, and four or more is generally too many. any thoughts?

2.5 definately!

ok..I've always gone with 2 also..but I want a girl first then a boy

nothing wrong with being a middle child - on most days, I think I turned out ok... I have two siblings, I never played with either of them... Don't have more than one kid just so you think they'll have playmates...

Ideal number of children? none - -but a dog would be nice... :D

more than 1 but less than 4. i guess that leaves 2 or 3. yeah...that sounds about right.

At least two, no more than ten. I don't know why ten, but that just seems like a top limit to me. Oh, and I'm a middle child, it was ok, not great, but ok.

I agree with maleficent. The wife and I have agreed that the ideal number for us is zero. However, if we were to adopt, I guess it would be two.

None. A cat is better.

my mom had 4, and I am the oldest. I have 3 younger sisters, and the middle one has all of the classic middle child symptoms, and we have agreed that we do not want that kind of drama.

I'll have to go with zero, Alex.

I'd say 1 - 3. I've always wanted to have at least one kid. I think I'd make a good dad. It's a bit of a scary thought though...

None, with occasional visits from the nieces and nephs...



/hugs his doggy

Two. And the older one should be a girl so she can babysit her little brother or sister.

i am glad so many of you arent having children. maybe the impending world overpopulation wont be so bad afterall.

Hmmm...I think there are plusses and minuses to each number.

Zero:
Plus: No college tuition! Freeeedooooom!! Also, good for an overpopulated planet.
Minus: People keep bugging you about when you're going to squeeze one out.

One:
Plus: Kid gets undivided attention, never has to experience sibling rivalry. Also good for an overpopulated planet because it's less than the replacement rate.
Minus: Potential for loneliness, spoiled bratness.

Two:
Plus: Each has someone to play with, whomp up on. Replacement rate of reproduction = zpg.
Minus: Two college tuitions, sibling rivalry.

Three:
Plus: Middle child disrupts balance of power, provides real-life sociology laboratory.
Minus: They now outnumber you.

Four or more:
Plus: Now qualify as a "big family."
Minus: What are you, a breeder?

None for me. At least for planned children.

I'm the youngest of three. It seemed to work out okay. As for me, my ideal number is Zero.

Ya 2 would be nice I'm a middle child it hasn't really changed me, I'm still screwed up just like my bros;)

But when I talk to my GF she says we should have had another, but I think 2 kids by the time your 20 is a little crazy:eek: I got a 5 year old daughter so a son would be nice. :thumbsup:

but 3 wouldn't matter to me but 4 is pushing it!

It depends on how much their goin' for on the black market.

2, preferably a daughter then a son, but any combination of gender would be fine with me

Gary Larson says 2.5

Thats what a buddy of mine wanted...then he ended up with 3 daughters..hes going to have to buy a shotgun to keep the boys back!

There is only one smart choice here, IMO.
That is "none."

Replace yourself in this world, don't add to the problem; no more than 2.

I had one...no problems with being spoiled or bratty or being lonley

i'm a fan of none...

Lurkette, You rock! :lol:

either one or none is my choice...

Nah, it just means that the Muslims, Chinese, and Indians will out-breed us.

None for me. The middle child thing sounds a bit dodgy to me, i am 1 of 3 and the middle child is/was perfectly fine growing up, its how you raise em, but id rather not bother :D

My dad is like.. one of 14, I think. That's understandable because my grandpa has an ego that's far too big for the tiny island he lives on.

I'm one of 3. My family turned out fairly well.

I think I want a maximum of 3 kids if I ever do settle down.

I would say two...
more than two and you are contributing to overpopulation.
One to replace each of you when you die.

I have 2, one is 14 and one is 16 months... very far apart has been great and currently trying for #3

Some people seem to want at least 2, one of each sex, to satisfy the egos of both the mother and father.
This is particularly noticeable when you see a family of three, with 2 girls and a boy or 2 boys and a girl. Now everyone is happy!

I am one of those how would say 0 and get a dog or two. Dogs are cheaper an more loving

Dogs don't live as long, though.

they also don't become teenagers :D

I wouldnt say more loving.. there is nothing better in this world when your kids tell you they love you!!!!
When my little one runs up to me saying mama mama and throws his arms around me and I get a big kiss from him I melt everytime.
Even my teenager has ways to let me know how he feels.... I even cried yesterday when he told me he made the JV Football team at his high school
Very rewarding!

Hubby and I have always wanted two. We both come from families where there were only 2 siblings. Now though? We are content with ONE. We don't regret any of the trials to give birth to her or the cost to raise her so far. I know it gets even more expensive after puberty but we haven't gotten there yet. We adore our little girl. BUT we don't want anymore. One is enough. I REALLY do not want to go through 21 hours of labor again. Hubby really does not want to go through a week of sleepless nights due to prelabor. I REALLY do not want to go through another c-section either. ONE is plenty in light of just those problems.

I have a home day care and enjoy it quite well (minus that month of January when cabin fever hits me BIG time) and it gives her lots of kids to play with. She has learned to share quite well in my opinion. She also still gets the one on one attention that every parent wants to give their child. I HOPE that she doesn't become spoiled from being an only child.

Um, what other configuration of 3 kids is there? Your logic assumes quite a bit I'd say. ;)

3 boys or 3 girls. :)

I would say two, but my wife didn't want to have any more after the first one. That was one of the most bitter arguments we'd ever had, and it's probably the only thing I cannot quite forgive her for. (She's a great woman, but it's just a very painful issue for me.)

So my advice is to settle this early if at all possible.


[Edit to be more honest] I didn't provide as much support while our daughter was a baby as she needed. And we started late, so at this point it's fairly academic... Still, it hurt. A LOT. So try to avoid this kind of contention if you can.

I had the same situation, she wanted one (didn't like being pregnant) and I wanted at least two. I guess we both got our way because we had twins. :thumbsup:
I could handle having more, but that ain't gonna happen ;)

Children? I want to have six, but no less then four or so, just seems like the right number to me...

Two children would be ideal

The ideal amount of children = ZERO children.

We have 2, pretty happy with that. They are close in age and are pretty tight as friends and playmates. I grew up in the middle of three, never saw it as a big deal. I couldn't imagine more than that, between attention and money for each of them, it would be tough.

There are a lot of days where it would be great to have none, just put the dogs in the kennel and go... but life would seem so empty without them

I am from a family of 5 kids (I'm a twin to!) yet I have no desire to have any (planned) kids of my own.

I am from a family of 5 kids (I'm a twin too!) yet I have no desire to have any (planned) kids of my own.

zero is the perfect number.

I respect the "zero children" opinions, but I couldn't imagine life without my two daughters. We contemplated trying for one more child - hoping it was a boy - but we decided that two kids is the perfect number for us.

I think there are two questions (not that you asked, exactly):

Adoption or not?

How many?

The benefits of adoption are many. There must be thread here about adoption, mustn't there? We spent a month in Vietnam to pick up our daughter, and it was the among the best months of my life. Would be thrilled to answer PMs about adoption, as I don't have much time to post on that now. :D


As far as how many, I would vote one. I'm shocked there aren't more people that say that. With one, you still have some semblance of your own life. With two children, that is gone. This is validated by observing our many friends with one child, and the friends with more than one.

As far as the siblings to play with issue, it's far over rated. Many siblings DON'T play with each other. And many single children (like ours) have many many friends. There isn't a day that goes by that there isn't contact with other kids.

The best of both worlds!

I heard lots of people say that and they end up with 2 or 3 kids! :D

Having twin would suck, my GF had one and her back and feet where killing her, I could just imagine what your wife went through, but my GF was also 3 weeks over due(9 pound 3 oz. baby girl) :eek:

IMHO 3 kids is about right.. i come fro ma family of 5

From a parent of three, two is a pretty good number.

One child was fairly easy. (planned)

Two wasn't very hard. (planned)

The addition of the third made the workload go up exponentially. (you're what?!?!)

As my wife says, having the third child makes you feel like you have 5 kids. I love all of my kids, but taking care of three is much, much harder then taking care of two. It doesn't help that the middle is potty-training and the youngest is in diapers.

I always wanted a boy and a girl, however, there were other plans for me in the works. I had one son, actually thought I'd rather not have anymore. Became pregnant unknowingly, then lost the baby. Couldn't seem to get pregnant again fast enough. I don't think you really truly understand your needs or wants until it is out of your hands. I did become pregnant and had a second son. Happy as hell with them :)

Loosing a baby is hard weather it is planned or not, I guy I worked with came in one week looking tired and depresses and a co-worker told that his GF had a miscarriage, he still isn't the same to this day, he is feeling better because he has a new son to take care of but that though will be with him. I can't think of how much a mess I would have been if I ever lost my Daughter I love her with my whole heart and not getting to see her everyday just makes me want to pick up and move to Switzerland, but then I'm leaving all my family and friends behind just so I can be with the 2 women I love the most....I don't think I could do that! She hasn't seen me in 4 years so her seeing me would be a big shock to her system and probably mine, I hope to get out there for a vacation in the next year or so...I miss them both(I should bring them both back with me:D) But I have talked to her on the phone!

The correct answer is more than 1. I know it's a generalization, but I know WAY too many people who were "only children" who fit into the stereotype of being spoiled, unwilling to share (even as adults), and used to getting their own way on everything. I think kids learn a lot socially by having siblings.

ideal: none...I really do not see myself as being a good parent. I would be the most loving, adoring, caring, hardworking father in the world....but...I would rather not bring someone else into this world and i'd rather use those skills to help out someoen who is here already..

and maybe the chinese or muslims or whomever will outbreed 'us' but that's fine, I don't have to 'think of the children, won't somebody please, think of the children" :) I'm kidding, partially, but i do not believe in a cold war of breeding...

I would like two children- a boy and then a girl. I would consider three, but two just seems to be the perfect number.

alot of you don't want kids........hmmmmmmmmmm.......


.....best damn things i've ever made were my kids.


1 boy-12,........1 girl-8.

i still get to learn along with them and it's a great experience.


...and i'm lookin' forward to the way they turn out.......


magic # of kids for me is 2........

(cuz i got snipped and can't have anymore)........[sarcasm](another real great experience)[sarcasm]

None for us. No more worry about what kind of parents would be and no worries as to what kind of children we would have.

I looked forward to having kids so I could see what kind of parent I would be and especially what my kids would turn out to be.

my wife and i currently have a baby girl, 5 months old, would like to have 1 or 2 more kids, having them about 3 years apart. 2 for sure, the 3rd will be discussed after number two is 2-3 years old.

None, I say.

I'm not so sure that siblings teach children to get along. Maybe it depends on the person, but my experiences growing up with my sister taught me to hoard small pieces of cheese and hide in closets - basically like a rat.

Thats the scary part my daughter turned out like her mother...thanks god

I would love one boy one girl. My girlfriend wants 2 boys 2 girls. Why not One girl, One Boy and one Other.

Ideally, none. We have one, and love her. But, no more for us.

It's a simple answer... PI.

Nah, I agree with two as well. Not too hectic, good social balance between the kids. 3 is a bit wierd and 1 is right out. 4 gets a bit crazy to keep up with... and so does everything above it. (I come from 2, so I may be a bit bias.)

1 of each(boy and girl).

I used to say I never wanted kids. Now, I know that I made a huge mistake and should have had one or two. They are real miracles and love incarnate.

Ideally, have as many as You can afford to care for, keep healthy and help educate. It's amazing how many 'brilliant sounding' tfpers are saying 'None' to this post...which makes me wonder which demographical groups are having the most kids, out there in the World.

Just wondering, because statistics reflect that the higher the person's IQ - the less likely that person is to procreate, in general.

Any thoughts?

I didn't think I ever wanted children...

...then I got pregnant. :D

Now I have this amazing 13 year old person who is the most wonderful thing that could have ever come into my life. Also, we lost her dad 3 years ago, and she is so much like him sometimes it is just mind blowing. I am so appreciative that she's here with me. :)

Best thing I ever did.

2 for every individual familie. We already have too many people fighting for the limited resources there is.

2 as long as it's one of each

Other :hmm:


LMAO :D

Three works for me. Just make sure they are all boys. I don't think I could handle the daily emotional roller-coatser that comes along with raising even a single girl.

Middle-child syndrome? No such thing!

Wow, I can't imagine not wanting to have children... I would be very upset if my heritage died off with me, and I didn't leave a little piece of me behind in this world.

I think I'm going to be a great dad, I want no more than three kids... Any more than three and you need to buy a bigger car.

Whats wrong with a middle child? I'm planning on growing 3 :D
.5 down, 2.5 to go ;)

Ideal number of children: Zero.

Wow. I can completely understand that some might not want children of their own. But your answer seems to imply that that's the only choice that makes sense for anyone. If everyone followed your advice, wouldn't the human race die out?

I'm just interested in hearing where you're coming from :).

I'm one of three, and I wouldn't have traded my childhood for anything. We always had each other growing up, but now we're scattered throughout the country. I miss my little bros:(

I have a 9-year-old stepson, whom I love to pieces, and I want two of my own someday.

Ya I would like to know why you wouldn't want to keep your family name going?

Just have one at a time and you will know when to stop. We shut down the factory right after number two.

Hmm lately i've been wondering if i want ANY ... but if i do 1-2
2 is my max. Never more. :thumbsup:

I'd have two... then if there's an accident, i'll either have three (which is bareable) or i'll still have one left. My god, what an awful thing to say.

Wouldn't it be nice if we could carry on breeding for years and years... then we could have one kid, wait 16-21 years til they move out then have another one over and over.

I'd like to have two kids. No more than two. One would be ok, but I think he/she would get lonely without a brother/sister.

I have 2 kids and though I'd like more we've stopped. I get too sick when I am pregnant. We might adopt though. I have two boys one is almost 3 and one is almost 1. I love having them that close too because they are really good friends even now.

Rachel

0.

Having a child with another person just means you're forever attached to that other person.

Generally when a relationship expires as people get older and change, you wanna be done with it and get on with your life and to the next best thing, but when you have kids, you're always going to have to see that person and deal with them.

I just don't see any real reason to do that to my life.

2 Kids is the right number from the standpoint of a family...plus with 2 kids, you fill a ride at disney, quad chairlift, middle row of a 767, etc.

my first post and its still goin. I am proud! ZG made some good points to strenghen my chioce for 2 children, mainly the filling the ride thing. Its a wasted seat if you have 3 of you, and 5 in the family means someone has to wait, or sit with other strangers.

Yeah, but if you have two kids how will you be able to afford the price of a ticket into Disney, the quad chairlift at your local ski resort, and you sure aren't taking a trip on a 767 ;)

The day I actually meet that special someone and settle down, I'd like to have 1-3 kids.

Are there any "only one kid in the family" out there to respond to that silly notion that having an "only child" equates being lonely or too spoiled? I'm friends with several "only children" and they seem quite well adjusted and happy. And very close to their cousins and relatives.

Just curious...it seems like a fine idea.