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The All Purpose VENTING Thread
Didn't see one of these on here and I thought we could use a thread that's all about blowing off steam...but not really worth starting a thread about.
For example: About a week ago I broke up with a girl I'd been seeing, this afternoon she calls me up for a "talk" and sadly I was already running late for a gig downtown and didn't have time to talk. Keep in mind we've BROKEN UP!!!!!!!!! So I get home, relaxing with a drink and up pops an email, a very long winded email from her all about how I never have time for our relationship and how we'd still be together if I made her a priority. Jesus Christ... Yeah not really worth a thread but in the heat of the moment its nice to get it off your chest. SO vent away about exes, stubbed toes, meat head bosses, cigarette burns and spoiled milk. Its ALL fair game. EDIT: This is probably in the wrong section, feel free to move it if necessary. :) |
Our old living room tv picture tube bought the farm, so we're on the way to buy another tv when we discover the rear passenger's side electric window won't roll up any more. It's stuck all the way down.
Last week, it was the rear driver's side window that quit working. Luckily, we were able to pull it up. This Texas heat, boy I tell ya.... To quote Earl from "Tremors", "Is there some kind of outside forces at work against us!?" |
I wish I could just sit back and not give a shit about anyone else, like so-called "normal" people can.
And fuck our society for encouraging and teaching people to be willfully ignorant. |
I swear that not listening was contagious among the older kiddos at work today. Grrrr.
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Family members fly into town for a visit and I volunteer to pick them up, flight gets delayed/they get bumped at a layover in NC and said family members decides on earlier flight to Huntsville, AL. I drive to Nashville to pick up dumb ass Aunt and Uncle and get a call on my cell phone "can you come pick us up in Huntsville? We took a different flight".
Yeah I don't mind driving 2 and a half hours out of my way because you can't wait in the airport bar and drink like normal people. The layover would have been an extra 4 hours. Goddamn my family is stupid. |
My boss comes up to me today waving a document in the air, and says "you said we don't have any copies of this text!" As one of my tasks is to monitor and record the inventory of these texts, I was shocked, certain that I had been methodical in my cataloging of our stock. As I stammered out an apology for missing a copy she continued with, "so you're sure we don't have any?" I ask where she got the one in her hand, she said that it was one she brought in from home. Now, my boss is not a native english speaker and she probably didn't realize that her turn of phrase changed her meaning from a question into an accusation.
So yeah, misunderstanding on my part, but after she left I couldn't help thinking that any comment I make that she misunderstands reflects badly on me, but when the tables are turned I get no apologies. Sucks being the low man on the totem pole I guess. First post in 4 years! Seems I really needed to vent today... |
Which part of "I'm busy" didn't you understand? My friend at work is really pissing me off. He asks if I am busy. I say yes. And then he proceeds to ask me stupid not work related questions. One more time and he is going on ignore. Yesterday he sent me a text during his lunch to tell me what he is eating. Like I really care??? I am getting the feeling that we are not going to be able to be just friends. I don't think he can handle it. I could go on forever about this, but this is good enough for now.
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Ugh. I don't give a fuck if you think I'm patronizing you. Your feelings are largely irrelevant when you're balls deep in debt and have no clue as to how to unfuck yourself. Just take a look out our bank accounts and you'll most likely deduce which one of us has a clue. I was trying to help you out. That's all. Stop being all emo on me. If you don't prioritize, sacrifice, and start digging yourself out now, you'll be working shit jobs and complaining about your empty wallet until you kick the bucket at 55 from the stress. Rumor has it I'm supposed to go in a box before you but I doubt that'll happen.
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When I am in town on my own, a small girl that can get intimidated and you want to guilt trip me and beg please pick somebody else because I am all out of sympathy and will just say no without apology because I get up and go to work everyday instead of taking herion. Thank you very much.
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No, jackwagon, I -don't- believe that you were "servin' in Veeyetnayum" as a "Marine Delta SEAL Sniper." No, I -don't- believe you worked with Hathcock. No, I -don't- believe you've been recalled "fer survasiz in Eye-rack killin' ragheads." Why? Well, let's see here: I can see from your Driver's License that you were borne in 1968, which makes you all of 7 years old in 1975. I can see from the way you kept trying to take my guns apart that you're totally unfamiliar with the Remington 700 -or- Winchester Model 70, which were the bases for Vietnam-era sniper rifles, and are still used thussly today. And I can see from the way you walk that you either posses the hip-joints of an arthritic bowlegged racehorse or no hips at all. Where -would- I get the idea you were bullshitting me?!?!
No, I will -not- buy your Jennings J-22 for $200.00! It's a complete piece of shit that I wouldn't sell to my worst enemy, and guess what? NEW it only costs $110.00, and that's RETAIL! It's not a "good-shootin' little ol' gun," it's a vaguely gun-shaped BOMB waiting to take your fingers off! No, I do not sell machine-guns. I know they -look- like machine-guns, but I promise they're not. No, I will not show you how to convert your SKS to full-auto. No, I will not -tell- you how to convert your AK to full auto. No, your cuzzin does not have a real full-auto AK. He has a jerry-rigged abomination known as a "slam-fire" which will, in short order, destroy the gun and hopefully kill him. That's -if- he doesn't get 10yrs for Unlawful Possession first. No, I will not buy your sawn-off shotgun. Get it out of my shop. What's it worth? About ten years. Git. No, I will not let your toothless, broke-dick ass sit in my shop and rant about "thuh niggurz an' thuh faggitz," especially not with a black customer there, and MOST ESPECIALLY not when he drops thousands of dollars per year and you buy one box of .22 ammo. No, I will not sell you a gun without a background check, Mr. Konvicted Ku Klux Klansman. See this skin? Louisiana Creole. It will now give me -great- pleasure to throw you out of my shop. Would you mind resisting? Please? Go on, take a swing at the nigger with a gun. No, I will -not- loan you one of my $500.00 Smith & Wesson revolvers to carry while your beat-to-shit Rossi (that you bought somewhere else) is in the shop. No, I don't believe that "thuh niggerz'll git me'n mah wahfe!" if I don't. Why? Well, because as any Anthropologist could tell you, African-descended folks have large sinuses and nasal passages, as well as enlarged nasal openings. Since -I- can smell your trousers from 20' away, I can't imagine any Black folks would want to get within smelling range...which on you, jackass, exceeds the effective range of most of the items in my shop. No, your -boots- smell like cow-shit, your -trousers- smell like people-shit, and -you- smell like you haven't bathed or wiped your ass since the Coolidge Administration. No, I do not have trout in my ponds. Only catfish. Yes sir, just catfish. No sir, no trout. That's right, just catfish. No sir, we haven't had any trout in about twelve years. No sir, no trout. Right, only catfish. Yup, got rid of the trout about twelve summers ago. Yessir, just catfish. No, no trout. No sir, it's been about twelve years. Yessir, it really has. Nope, no trout, just catfish. No, I will not order you a $4,500.00 SASS, REPR, or Remington MSR without a deposit. No, I -don't- "know you're good ferrit." No, I cannot be intimidated by your tales of service as a Marine Delta SEAL Sniper. Shall we review why? Look, just because you saw something on "Future Weapons" doesn't mean that: 1: It works (see XM-8, SCAR, AA-12) 2: It'll ever see the light of day (XM-8, LWRC's entry in the LAR contest) 3: You'll be able to buy it (duh, that shit's for the military!) 4: You'll be able to -afford- it (You want a SASS? Sure, that'll be $4500.00 please. No, I will not give you a 25% ex-military discount. Yes, I -do- have to collect Sales Tax.) Look, just because you saw a picture in a magazine doesn't mean the item exists yet. See the liiiitle-bitty writing down at the bottom? Where it says "PRE-PRODUCTION PROTOTYPE, NOT AVAILABLE FOR SALE" in nice, easily-read English? No, I don't know when it'll finally show up. No, I will not hold one for you without a deposit when they do. No, I don't care that your granddaddy was best friends with the Sherriff's wife's best-friends third cousin. You cannot possibly be asking me to read you the price on a $10.00 item. My taxes and my parent's taxes paid to send you to school for 12 years, and paid for Policemen to make you go if you didn't feel like it. Please tell me the hundreds of thousands of dollars and man-hours spent on your education were not such a complete waste that you are not only illiterate but innumerate as well. Please. And now you want me to read you the features, weights, velocity and powder-charge of this ammo? Do you even know what any of those numbers -mean- you illiterate, innumerate, inbred broke-dick lazy-ass moron!? No, I will not trade you -three- working guns for one -broken- gun. No, I will not trade three working guns for one broken gun and half a box of rounds. No, not even if you throw in the rotting '30s-vintage police holster. No sir, that's not a German Luger. It's a Ruger Mk-I in .22. No sir, not the same. No sir, the Luger was made in Germany and the Ruger is made in the US. Because Ruger didn't exist in WWII, let alone WWI. No sir, it's -not- a Luger, it's a Ruger. No, I can't give you $800.00 for it...well, sir, because it's a Ruger, not a Luger, and in this condition I'd probably be able to sell it for around $200.00. No, sir, I -don't- care that you paid $800.00 for it and now the light-bill needs paying...well, you might want to consider why you're running up a $600.00 electric bill in the first place. Might have something to do with the extra 300lbs of blubber you're carrying around and shoving into my display cabinets? Hefe, if you don't get these pendejos outta here muy pronto, we are gonna have problems. Immigracion, si. Because they keep trying to STEAL THINGS, asshole! Chinga tus madres, vaya! |
Jaysus, Dunedan.....
First, nice rant. Second, I thought that kind of shit only happens in movies. Forgive me—I'm a Canadian living in one of the most multicultural metropolitan cities in the world—but is this for real? |
1) I didn't think this thread could possibly be won. Dunedan, you've walked away with it.
2) I'll be outside your store holding a protest sign about the evils of handguns to give you fodder for your next rant. Well done. I salute you. |
Oh yeah. I've had 2-3 such things happen in one day previously.
About twice per year, somebody tries to browbeat/cajole/beg me into buying a Felony (ie an illegal sawn-off rifle or shotgun, an illegally converted slam-fire, etc) or a Catastrophe Waiting To Happen. When I don't, and explain why, about half are very grateful to me for saving their asses (literally). The other half curse, threaten, bluster, blow...and then leave. About as often, white racists or black/mexican gangbangers try to finagle their way into an unpapered transaction. Maybe once per month, I'll get somebody who just wants to sit around and sling racist bullshit: they usually leave pretty quick once I ask if they're buying (they never are) and inform them that I'm Creole. Of course, I usually have to explain what Creole -means-...then of course you get the obviously illegal immigrants who try to intimidate their way into stealing things, or ingratiate their way into a paperless transfer. The rest of that stuff happens anywhere from once per month to a minimum of once per week. Then you get the kids who want to play Call Of Duty in my showroom (with the $2500.00 rifles, not the PS_whatever), the grownups who want to use me as a babysitter (can I drop my son off here for five hours while I go to the Quilt Fair? He's twelve, plays Call Of Duty all the time, he'll behave himself I promise!), and the locals who want to use me as a pawn-shop despite the fact that with an IQ of 70 (yes, seventy!) they are not legally able to own a firearm in the first place and will therefore never be able to get it -back-. Edited to add: It's also worth noting that the people who inspire these rants generally don't buy anything. Most of them are too broke, and a sizable portion are convicted felons or otherwise legally barred from possessing firearms. The vast majority of my actual customers, people who put cold hard cash in my hot little hand, are at least workably intelligent. |
i wanted just to add my applause for the rant above, which i have read a couple times now and which has left me chuckling and rapt. well played, good sir.
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The bad one, RB, the -really- bad one, is the kid I call Private Obvious (he started as Captain Obvious, but got busted all the way back).
Now, if it weren't for gravity, this kid wouldn't be able to hit the -ground-. He's -that- bad. Yet, after watching "Top Sniper" on the Military Channel, he somehow got it into his head that he was a shoe-in for the Army Marksmanship Team. So one day, he came in and asked me to order him an Accuracy International "Arctic Warfare Magnum," with all the do-dads (folding stock, extra magazines, Pelican case, Zeiss scope, etc) in .338 Lapua Magnum. When I informed him that such a setup would cost around $15,000.00, he relented and asked for an Armalite package that would come to around $10,000. From there it went to a Tikka package at $8,000.00, a Blaser R-93 Tactical package for $5,000.00, a SASS for $4500.00, a REPR for $4,000.00, and finally a lower-end DPMS LR-308 for about $2,000.00. After three weeks of explaining to him the difficulties of; 1: Procuring the extremely exotic and very expensive weapons systems he'd requested, 2: Procuring the extremely expensive -ammo- for those weapons, 3: Dealing with the quite impressive -recoil- of that ammo and those weapons, 4: Getting to where he could shoot even remotely -close- to the capability of these weapons... ....he finally decided that the Army Marksmanship Unit was too snotty and elitist an outfit anyway, and he'd rather join the Marine Corps Nat'l Match team. Bear in mind that this kid has been in the Army Nat'l Guard for 5 years and has -never- been sent to Iraq. This person is so frickin' thick that he managed to drive a Bradley AFV backwards off a truck...without lowering the ramps. The Brad fell off the truck (naturally) and ended up upside-down on the turret. Took 3hrs to get dumbass out. -THAT'S- how dense this person is. He's never actually -spent- a single cent in my shop. |
I thought I had something to bitch about. Being wrong makes me feel better. xx,wtf?
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My dumb shit boss has underpaid me three grand this year. He was bought in to save the company cash.
But he will pay. Fair Work Australia is on their way now, on my behalf and everyone I have secretly been informing of this who have lodged complaints too. Dumb shit, if he had of just paid us he actually would have saved the company cash. Why? Cause now they have to pay what we are owed as well as (basd on similar action at other places) a 30,000 dollar fine. He will even cop about 5000 personally for overseeing this mess! All cause he won't chase up my group certificate so I looked up conditions and found out my real pay rate. Have fun at centrelink ya tool! |
I caught a virus or something last weekend and wasted the whole weekend in bed with a fever. Now I've "missed" 2 days of work - to keep from getting even further behind than I am, I've taken work home to work from the couch. Even though I'm taking on more and more responsibility, my boss (who makes 1/2 again what I do and twice what anyone else in the agency makes) hasn't built in a raise for anyone besides herself. And hasn't budgeted for an assistant for me. Again.
And my voice is COMPLETELY gone from coughing. Can't even squeak. And my loves keep calling things to me from other parts of the house, forgetting that I can't holler back. Ready to be well again. |
Just because we work together does not mean we are best fucking friends and i want to go out with you drinking every night of the week when i have to be at work at 6 in the goddam morning anyway.
Stop asking me for my fucking money. If i had enough to hand out to everyone who asked, we wouldn't be in this situation. Just show me the doctors note. don't tell me about your bleeding anus and your hemorrhoids and your whole fucking family history and your methods of treating said hemorrhoids. I certainly and clearly DO NOT CARE. The next time that little fucker down the street shoots his BB gun at my car, I'm going to take it from him and shoot him with it. |
Wow, Dunedan, that my friend is some world class, serious, grade A, pimped out venting! I am now cracking open a beer, nay a bottle of Jack if your honor.
(some of that reminds me of my time working in a backwoods gas and gulp about 10 years, no firearms involved (sometimes) but I think I served the same customers) |
Whenever you log on to the tan-colored forum and post some holier-than-thou weapon handling crap or talk about how you need to focus on the fundamentals... don't post pictures of your brought-to-you-by-Arby's FUPA eating an appendix holstered G19. Putting 10k 9x19 downrange each year won't stop that heart attack from having to run 300 yards. I don't give a shit what names you drop or what $2k 1911 you're using if you're another guy who's gut prevents him from doing push-ups. Nice plate carrier. I guess you don't need soft armor inserts, Captain Blubbergut.
I can see my dick when I look down. ... For the amount of money I've put into you, you'd think that I'd at least get some morning sex. But you're furniture, not a sputnik... so I guess that's okay. One day I'll come home from a business trip one and you'll be not-just-a-little fat and, yep, that'll be it. Keep your bags packed, baby. I love vegetables. Why can't you? ... Yes, I run a Rock River AR-15. No, I didn't buy it; it was a gift. Instead of trading it and my left nut for a Colt or a KAC or whatever, I chose to shoot the shit outta it. You can bitch about the inferior components and shoddy assembly all you want but I'm still outshooting you and I didn't have a single stoppage in 2k rounds. Now who's the real dumbass, Mr. Fancy Patriot Ordnance Factory Pants? Instead of spending so much money on your jam-'o-matic and cool guy sunglasses, how about you buy some big boy pants instead of blowing out the crotch of your skin tight Columbia hiking trousers in the middle of a three day shoot class and showing your bubblegum wad to BOB? DCU pants are $15 in Spring Lake at Old Sarge's. And I'm a lousy shot. ... I hope your new boyfriend/husband beats off as much as I used to do back in the day. It isn't that you're bad in bed; you're spectacular... but you're a total psycho. What's that? You're better now that you changed your birth control? Well, eat a dick! You couldn't do that for me when I asked? Oh, you needed a change in your life? Thanks. I'm glad our divorce could be that change. If you ever find urine stains on your door mat... it's just me. You and every other over-emotional woman I've nailed in the last decade had the same story: girl finds boy, girl hates boy, girl finds me, girl hates me because I'm stable/boring, girl leaves me for old boy, old boy just wants anal, girl gets herpes, girl vaguely regrets leaving me, girl joins Peace Corps. Meat on meat. ... Thanks for all the heads-up PMs, guys. You're like little Beavis clones. If there ever was a reason for me to pop the locks on your cars with a Big Easy kit and fill the back bench seats with day-old catfish innards, this would be it. It wasn't enough that people need to act like please-blackmail-me Reddit types, but you had to remind me that it was happening. Real public service. Why I'm pissed? You didn't think to share. Talk about clueless. Jerkoffs. ... Dear Giant grocery stores: Your fat free cottage cheese with pineapple chunks makes me feel like vomiting. I have no idea why; I normally love cottage cheese and fruit. I think the combination of the sweetness of the canned fruit and the saltiness of the cottage cheese combines to produce *gag*. Nom nom nom. ... Stop using children as a crutch to justify your mediocre life resume. You can't whine about life if you have no plan of action. You might have a higher IQ than me and a fancy degree, but you're still another tubby beatoff sock playing World of Warcraft and fapping it to Japanimation girls. Get a grip. You're not even 30. ... Wow, reading that aloud actually made me feel better. GO FEELINGS! |
And the venting thread has thus served its purpose Plan.
When I go into a gas station to buy smokes, please don't shove a petition in my face to ban a local mosque from being built by telling me how "they" are now hiding in small towns so its easier to congregate and plan future attacks. Better yet don't get all pissy and act like a victim when I tell you and your petition to fuck off. Thanks. |
If you live in a state where the average level of education absorbed is comfortably in the single digits, you can't really bitch about the dumb shit that people do. It's a little like climbing on a short bus, riding for half an hour and suddenly going, "Damn, why am I surrounded by retards!"
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I don't think its so much the state Plan, small minded idiots exist and thrive in all 50 states quite well, I experienced much worse when I lived in various places around New England.
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Let's say I live outside one of the most highly educated areas of the country. And let's say it's crammed orgy-with-clothes full of young upwardly mobile professionals. They're not dumb, they're not stupid... they went to Hah-vahd and they drive a car that's more expensive than my first house. They've just got an entitlement complex and can't be bothered to do things like hold open doors, operate vehicle turn signals, or give you the time of day.
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No I mean like hard core racist, bigoted, small minded, backward ass rednecks. But I never lived in Boston I lived in rural New England...which I think is the real problem urban vs rural settings. There's a huge difference between Boston and rural Maine as there is between Nashville and Appalachia.
Oddly I've found living outside of Nashville to be a breathe of fresh air...what the fuck is that all about? I don't know. |
To the dumbshit petitioners that are outside my store every fucking day... I work here. I have worked at this location for a year and a half. We have been seeing eachother almost every day during that time. You asked me to sign this this thing yesterday, and the day before, and the day before that. I didn't want to sign it then, I don't want to sign it now, I won't want to sign it tomorrow. Leave me alone.
Yes, I take my coffee black. Yes, I really do prefer it that way. Quit asking me why... I just do. It's not really all that strange, people. My last name is "Park," NOT "PARKS!" Quit adding the "S" onto my last name. It's 4 letters for Christ's sake, how hard is it to fuck up a 4 letter word? And its even a regular day-to-day word; no silent letters or odd rules of English happening there. |
If you drop my tortillas in the bag sideways it breaks them. Then I can't make tacos.
And with every bite of my half-tostadas I think about how much I hate you. |
Dear high-powered business person,
I love my new job. Honestly, I do. I've been here two weeks and so far it's been challenging and fun. I've clicked with my co-workers well enough that I already feel like one of the guys most days. And yeah, it does make me feel good that your MBA self has to call me to get something done. I've worked hard on developing the skillset I have, I know it's rare enough to make me valuable and that feels pretty good. But if anything is going to make me hate this gig in a year, it's going to be you. Your domain expired because you didn't get the emails to renew it. You didn't get the emails because when Joe Sysadmin left your company last year you didn't update your contact info at the registry. And now we have to fill out the forms if you want it back. Yes, we need incorporation documents. Yes, we need photo ID. Yes it has to be faxed and signed and faxed again, and yes we need a letter of intent as well. These aren't even our rules, so getting huffy about it isn't going to help your cause. None of this is my fault. Yelling at me will not expedite the process. And you know what? I don't have to listen to this shit. Maybe you're used to customer service lackeys you can browbeat into submission but I'm not them. I am a skilled labourer, I have better things to do with my day, I have people who are going to work with me to get their problems solved. If you're not one of those people I'm perfectly content to tell you that we've done everything we can here and take your hopefully more contrite call tomorrow when you realize that I am the one and only guy who can solve your problem. To be clear, this is your own goddamn fault. I don't care how urgent it is, and I don't care how much money it's costing you. If you'd taken the time to fill out the change of contact info when you should've this would not have been a problem. So suck it up, princess. See if you can find it in your shriveled, misshapen heart to show a little courtesy. Do everything I tell you exactly how I tell you to because I am the professional who does this for a living, and maybe if you're lucky and all the wheels are greased we can have this done some time next week. You don't like the way we do business? You think you'll have better luck elsewhere? Fine. Go with godaddy, where they do have clueless monkeys on the phone, and good luck to you. Somehow I think we'll get by on our thousands of satisfied customers who are willing to pay the premium for experience and expertise. My heart will go on without you. Haveaniceday. |
Your boss yelled at you? Jesus Christ, I can't imagine a more rude or childish behavior from someone you work for. I'm excited that you've got a new job, but I'd give him a, "I'm glad to get the job done, but you don't need to be yelling at me. It will get done and done right."
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Is that addressed to me? I wasn't talking about my boss. That was actually in regards to a client.
My boss is a pretty cool guy, actually. |
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for my vent - to all the people who determined that no-call no-show is an appropriate way to miss work at a plant that I am running - WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING??? I WILL FIRE THE SHIT OUT OF YOU. HOW DARE YOU DISRESPECT ME LIKE THAT! /post |
last night i was sitting in a publick house enjoying a fine beverage and watching keno numbers change. i noticed a guy notice me. he then walked across the room stopped next to me and put his index finger into my beer.
i said: your index finger is in my beer. he said: so it is. i'm sorry. i thought it was mine. i said: it is yours. it is your index finger that is in my beer. |
Jesus Christ. I don't want to go on vacation in eastern Europe. Did you see Hostel?
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Wow, thanks. I never get my hopes up. Ever. That is, until you said you'd come out here for Labor Day. Now you can't because of your debt, debt you had BEFORE you said you'd come out here. I get it. You love me. You tell me every day and every night. It's okay, I get it. You don't have enough money to come out here, but you have enough money for perfume (because I'll like it), a hybrid vibrator/dildo (because it's roughly the same size as me), starbucks, cigarettes, etc. Fuck me right? Apparently not until December. I love you, but I'm already stressed the fuck out as it is. I don't expect you to dig yourself deeper to come see me, but at least be honest about it and get your priorities straight. I can handle your money going to the hospital or credit companies, but not to starbucks.
My LT hates me (it's not my fault I got a skeleton key and network permissions before you; rank isn't everything sir. I've got an uncle on life support; they're probably going to pull the plug as soon as the anti-seizure meds wear off. Don't get me wrong, the man's a shitbag and a drunk and the world would be better off without him, but his death could adversely impact my grandfather's already tenuous grip on life. My Commanding General's Inspection is tomorrow. Guess what? I got six months worth of work done in two months. Guess what else? There was a total of ten months worth of work to do! Let's do the math: 10-6= seriously fucked PFC. I won't get busted down, or ninjapunched; hell, I probably won't even get a 6105, but it's still gonna fuck my pros and cons. I'm stuck with this nondeployable job until december or january. fucking battery office bitch job. All I wanted was go to war and do my job; in the sixties I would've been a commodity, a rare treasure. In this day and age I'm just another dipshit twenty year old that spends too much time playing call of duty and watching the military channel. Born to fight and trained to kill, ready to die but never will. Sick fucking joke. |
iiiiiiiiiii
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Ugh I've had a long weekend.
I don't even care to attempt to write all of the details of this out but fuck slacker musicians who think its all about getting messed up on designer drugs and fucking hot chicks instead of following through on commitments and working hard to make a living. Fuck you for always showing up late because you stayed out until sunrise the night before and fuck the girlfriend you've known all of two weeks that you're chasing all the way Phoenix because its just something you've "gotta do". Some people actually depend on paying gigs to make a living and when you back out at the last minute causing the rest of us to cancel a pay day it hurts but what the fuck do you care? Some spaced out hippy in Arizona might put out and usually has great acid, so fuck everyone who gave you a place to sleep, helped you with bills and went out of their way to help you get going so you can get back on your feet. I don't know even know why this is bugging me so much, it might just be lack of sleep or something usually this stuff just roll off my back but holy fuck have I been in a foul mood all weekend because this...its not even about the money really...I don't know... ...damn I'm terrible at putting thoughts to words...I give up. I do feel a little better having gotten it out of my system though. |
I've eaten a dozen boxes of cereal in the last month. My coworkers think I'm weird. They eat McDonalds and drink 40s. Huh.
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A dozen boxes of cereal doesn't sound weird...I live off that stuff too.
Who the hell drinks 40's anymore anyway? WTF? Actually now that I think about it I'm kind of craving a bowl full of Fruit Loops and a bottle of Colt 45. |
You're tired because you've been wakeboarding all day and don't want to drive 45 minutes back from the river, and it just really sucks because if you have to work at 9 you don't get to stay out as long? FUCK YOU!!! No I won't cover your shift tonight, just like I haven't the last 3 times you've texted me an hour before you're supposed to be at work. I've just worked 40 hours in the last 3 days at my real job...and you work part time, 20 hours a week at the place where I moonlight. Christ, kid...get a clue.
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Darn, I have to pee again.
Darn, I have to eat again. |
Jeez peez louise, you think you'd realize how close your next door neighbors are! Couldn't you at least TRY and be quiet? People are sleeping, and your driveway/car doors are right below my bedroom window. STFU, get in your car, and drive away. Do us all a favor and don't turn on your crappy techno until you're down the block.
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Remind me not to come back as a chicken.
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• The contraction of "it is" is: "it's," not "its."
• Most pluralization requires simply an "s"; the apostrophe is both unnecessary and incorrect. You're a writer; you should know this. The first few times looked like negligence.; the rest of the manuscript looks like ignorance. |
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Lindy |
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Give me a break. I have my head in a book. I come to TFP for breaks because I can do things here and not have to worry about having it prepared for publication in a book. And don't get me started on irony.... |
Dear DFW disability assistance staff,
It's been four days and I'm STILL pissed off at you. I don't normally hold a grudge about something that is over and done with, but seriously WHAT. THE. FUCK?! You deal with people who need help getting off Plane A to Gate B. You're seriously NOT going to be at the door to the plane because someone was convulsively vomiting and shaking on the plane and not able to stand up a minute, so you leave the gate? And then he has to sit there in the 104 degree heat and wait for your ass to come back? While shaking and GREEN and the flight staff is freaking out... Then, you drop us off at a McDonald's "Courtesy Cart" who flies us to the edge of the next terminal... thank you for NOT helping me with the three carry-ons and two seat cushions. And make him walk to an elevator, take it up a floor and walk to the next cart, ride another 200 yards and do it all over again? Do you not see him shaking and turning white? And then, homegirl bitchiness... you mean to tell me that you are put out by the thought of helping me push him in a wheelchair just TWO GATES DOWN because I'm struggling with the three carryons and two seat cushions. I'm sooooooooo sorry to put your fat ass out by walking 200 feet. And you know what? American Airlines staff kicks your sorry ass. I cried my eyes out 20 minutes later when they upgraded us to first class and found him a cot to lay down on when we were delayed an hour and a half. I never want to wish harm on someone but I hope that one day, each and every one of you has to rely on someone else to help you out so you know that feeling of weakness, embarrassment, and sheer necessity of will to make it through a horrible situation. And, Jacksonville International Airport staff? Fuck you, too. Except the little muppet man that pushed S so fast through the terminal after we waited 10 minutes in the heat getting off the plane again that I had to run to keep up. And then the guy who took pity on my trying to push him myself... with the three carryons and two seat cushions... and pulled two wheelchairs at a time up the ramps and to baggage claim. He was alright until he started bitching later about helping the other little old lady with her three bags from Hawaii. Most of the airport staff... you can go FUCK yourselves with a nettle-encrusted dildo. In the ass. Sincerely, one pissed off n0odle. |
iiiiiiiiiii
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When waiting for the bus, why not get your pass or money out BEFORE stepping on,
therefore speeding up the process! |
Mr. Sweaty Guy,
You delivered my expensive slate table. It's made out of slate. Which is basically an interlocking series of square pieces of rock. Assembly note: YOU CAN'T DROP IT BECAUSE IT WILL BREAK. I don't look forward to seeing you again. But I will. To replace it. |
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Next you'll tell me your entire kitchen is stainless steel except for your marble countertops and the bricks around your wood oven. |
Dear Random CT Tech Bitch,
Yes, it does take awhile to upload 378 images of high resolution CT scans over a VPN from the crappy DSL that the admin bought for the company. Yes, I can make it run faster.... without paying for a higher broadband connection? No, I can not work magic. I can not make it run faster because shitty poo-dunk medical facility won't shell out an extra $50 a month for 10mb DSL connection. This is not my fucking fault. Do not jump on my fucking case because "one day" a month ago, the internet stopped working and your fat, overpaid, doughnut absorbing, The View watching, slutty biker bitch ass had to stay a WHOLE FUCKING HOUR past 5 oclock to upload the images. Boo-fucking-hoo. Cry me a river full of bacon grease, which I'm sure 60% of your body is made up of. I'm here to replace a VPN router to fix the issues you are having. By replacing this piece of equipment I'm holding in my hand, it will fix your "internet thingy". Didn't hear me? Let me repeat myself FOUR FUCKING TIMES because you want to tell me FOUR FUCKING TIMES about the EXTRA FUCKING HOUR you spent because the "internet thingy" went down. I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK. Sit the fuck down, shut the fuck up and stuff another goddamn chocolate covered cherry in your fat, disgusting, 3 drinks to take a ride, mouth so I can do my fucking job. I hope you choke on that piece of candy and fucking kill over. Then I hope your family has to pay extra because you are to fat to fit into a regular sized grave and they have to bring in heavy equipment just to dig a hole big enough for your over-sized ass. |
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It's the best insult I've heard since I overheard a guy on the street call someone an "H&M-jeans-wearing bitch." |
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http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...ents/youre.jpg |
Yeah, there was a lot of that in there too.
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Buncha loosers.
Waddaya gunna do about it than? |
i love amazing grace...
/rant over... |
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Just last week I ordered a new pair of glasses, I go in to get them and they are broken at the nose piece, snapped right in two. I'm waiting on a new pair which will take another 3 weeks, yeah I don't mind squinting and getting headaches for another month because some idiot in packing can't contemplate that delicate eye glasses might need a little protection while rumbling across the country in the back of a truck. When you don't have a lot of money it hurts to spend it on anything, especially a luxury and when the people you give your hard earned money to can't even be bothered to treat your purchase with care its beyond infuriating. |
I hate that you have this funny little laugh as you tell me about the
torture that you're about to inflict upon my mouth. Seriously, cut your fucking fingernails and realize that I am not jumping out of my seat every time you jam your thumbnail into my lower gums just for emphasis. It fucking hurts. And thank you for not noting in my chart that I'm latex-sensitive and that when you put things in my mouth that have latex in them, I break out and swell up. Ya fuckin' ass. |
I have to stand sitting next to you 5 hours.
Don't make your shitty work ethic make me look bad. Use appropriate workplace language when you pick up the phone, whoever is on the other end isn't your homie, it's a fucking customer. Speak about 40 decibels lower when you call your friend at work, and don't stay behind the front desk. Don't get to work an hour late and tell me you were at a film casting call, and try to make up for it by bringing me back coffee. It's 25 cents, I can get my own. And for fuck's sake, if you need youtube, watch it on mute. I shouldn't endure your shitty taste in music and wait for you to mute it so I can pick up the phone. |
I keep dreaming about the damn oil spill. This willful negligence has damaged my psyche, and yet, I can't seem to figure out how to change things.
My boyfriend is working nights. I still get to see him, but I'm going to miss sleeping with him. I finished my last class today. No more hot-prof. -__- So sad. |
oh, and would people puh-LEEZE learn how to spell definitely - like with an "i" instead of an "a"...
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Rediculous!
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love ya two, ring...
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your know amature, that's for sure.
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Dear UPS Driver,
I know you're a Teamster, and I know you're new. I know all your Teamster buddies have informed you that you aren't required to do anything but drive the truck, and that loading/unloading are jobs for "Them." You know, the non-Teamsters of the world. Permit me to disabuse you of that notion. I pay UPS, who pays you, and -they- pay you to drive, load, and unload that Goddamned truck. Neither I nor they pay you to park that truck in the middle of my parking-lot, 30 feet from the door, and sit there blowing your horn. I am -not- going to walk out 30 feet into my parking lot to do your job for you. Your truck has mirrors, a tail-end camera, and a loooooong overhang on the ass-end. Do like your predecessors, and just back up to my door. It's not hard, and it'll make your life a -lot- easier when you have to manhandle 400lbs of Russian Destruction into your truck in 90-degree weather. And yes, believe it or not, you -do- have to do that. I will happily -help- you with it, but no, I am not going to load your truck for you. I am -also- not going to walk out into the middle of my parking lot in the rain to UNload your truck for you. Furthermore, none of this will improve with repetition. The first time you sat in my parking-lot and blew the horn at me, I stood in the door and waved. The second time, I blew a marine air-horn at you, then stood in the door and waved. If this horn-blowing nonsense persists, so will my escalation. You want bagpipes? Bring it. You know, there's a recession on. Lots of people are out of work and would be perfectly happy to take that job, with all the wonderful benefits and Union-scale wages, off your hands if you dislike it -that- badly. I'm sure several of your fellow drivers, the ones who know what they're doing and don't get a vaguely queasy look on their faces when they realize we're a gun-shop, would be equally delighted to relieve you of this onerous responsibility and hideous trial of having to actually get off your ass. You might wish to ponder this. Very sincerely yours, Dunedan |
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Lindy |
It's quite cool the two queued posts I have under "punctuation" deal with both these incongruencies, and as illustrative beratements, no less.
* - coincidence monster Quote:
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I sense a meta-rant. I'm going to behead the pass itself. Bye. |
Don't worry, grammar Nazis... soon English will be dumbed down to "itz" for all uses of "its" and "it's" just as "yer" will replace "your" and "you're."
/1984 |
and we can't forget "there's a few..."
sheesh... |
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Ah. Here it is... (I always forget stuff, but I never learn to let them go away altogether - Retrieval.) re: Official language of the European Union Quote:
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Dear Major Financial Institution,
I keep a ridiculously high balance in my "super elite" account because I get benefits like free overdraft protection. You just charged me a $10 fee for something that was free last month, stating that it is "a new company policy." That's cool. $10 isn't anything to worry about, right? Wrong. I signed up for free overdraft. I expect it to cover me because I'm going to be out of the country and in places where Internet access is iffy at best. So congratulations. You just lost a long time customer and enough money to pay cash for a BMW 5 series. Jerkoffs. |
* Hi byeț ase țe wedercoc țet is ope țe steple, țet him went mid eche wynde.
o They are like the weather-cock that is above the steeple, that turns itself with every wind. o Page 180; translation from Walter W. Skeat Early English Proverbs Chiefly of the Thirteenth and Fourteenth Centuries (Oxford: Clarendon Press, 1910) p. 61. * A roted eppel amang țe holen: makeț rotie țe yzounde. o A rotten apple will spoil a great many sound ones. o Page 205. * Zuo longe geț țet pot to țe wetere: țet hit comț to-broke hom. o So long goes the pot to the water, till at last it comes home broken. o Page 206; translation from William Carew Hazlitt English Proverbs and Proverbial Phrases (London: Reeves and Turner, 1882) p. 352. Ayenbite of Inwyt ...is my all time favorite. |
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CHILL THE FUCK OUT! We're illiterate here ... |
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Lindy |
GodDAMMIT people! If you're going to invent a 105% Kickass product, spend a year-plus developing it, and advertise it all over God's creation...FOR FUCK'S SAKE STICK TO YOUR DELIVERY DATES!
Yes, Kel-Tec, I'm talking to you assholes! Y'all make an awesome product, and I sell the living shit outta everything you send me...but every time you come up with something new it takes 3X longer than projected to actually -get- the thing! And it's not like it's an accident or something! You premier the RFB at SHOT 2007. Kickass, a .308 bullpup that takes cheap-as-shit FAL magazines and lets you slap a reeeeeeally long barrel on the sucker. Run slow powders and 200-grain-plus bullets, and you're getting .300WM performance out of a .308! Awesome! And it'll be available September of 2007 you say? Kickass! So it's 9/07, and you tell us it'll be available in December. Meanwhile I have people wanting to pay me $4,000+ for one. So 12/07 rolls around, and you tell us it'll -actually- be released in 3/08, so you can more heavily market it at SHOT 2008. OK, that sucks, but I can live with it. 3/08 gets here, and you tell us that it's -really- coming out in 8/08, to make sure the marketing's had a chance to fully penetrate. Asshole, the penetration is accomplished! Your advertising has penetrated my market so completely that jerkoffs I don't even -know- are coming in here offering me 2x MSRP for this thing! 8/08 comes, and you inform us that you'll -probably- release it for sale sometime around 3/09, to make sure you can advertise it better at SHOT 2009. Meanwhile, the people who -were- offering me thousands of dollars over MSRP a short few months ago are now wondering if this weapon even -exists-, and have bought something else instead. So now it's 3/09, the first RFB finally shows up nearly two years late, after months of horseshit and chain-jerking and you jackholes admitting that you're delaying introduction of a -HUGELY- desired product for marketing reasons. And do you know what the -result- of that was, you short-sighted morons? NOBODY WANTS THEM ANYMORE. Everybody figures that the reason for the delay is that the thing's a turd. And the sad part is, it's -actually- a completely kickass rifle! However, it's a kickass rifle that neither I nor anybody else can -give- away, because some drunken monkey down in Marketing has you convinced that a marketing strategy which convinces everyone your product is worthless is a GOOD thing! And now you've done the same thing to us with the PMR-30 pistol, only now you've made it WORSE! You've not only dithered around with "Phantom Gun Syndrome" for months now, you've apparently decided to only distribute these weapons to complete broke-dick do-nothing shops in Possum Hollar, Missourri! These guys do NOTHING! They sell NOTHING! I know this because they have fewer feedbacks on GunBroker than I rack up in a busy week! And yet somehow they have this weapon before any of my distributors, wholesalers, or industry contacts? Puh-leeze. You guys make a great product, and your engineering is really top-shelf stuff, but for fuck's sake quit screwing the dealers! You're never going to get a Gov't contract, so quit chasing that rainbow and remember that it's the DEALERS who make you your money, the DEALERS who support your company, and it's the DEALERS who keep you in business. WE are YOUR customers, and we'd like to be able to stay that way! |
I didn't graduate from business college and then university to be paid $13.50 an hour to be a managing editor, webmaster, and marketing coordinator with a company almost completely void of structure, management, and leadership.
I'm an idiot. |
How many times do I have to explain to my one workplace that the church moves like a glacier? I can't make the guy from Trustees respond to me any more quickly. He knows he needs to call me. Grrr.
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A few tips for concert goers...well not you folks I doubt any of you are this stupid but I need to vent... GRRRR :mad:
When you attend a concert maybe pay attention to the type of club you're in and what kind of music the band is playing. Because it makes you look kind of stupid when you drop $5 in the tip jar, approach the stage to request a Brooks & Dunn song (at a jazz show) and then very loudly try to fish your $5 bill out of the jar in the middle of a song because the band didn't play it. When somebody leaves a live mic on stage during a quick set break or re tuning it doesn't mean "YAY drunken karaoke time!!!" Bars and clubs often have multiple exists but that doesn't mean you always get to use them, especially not when you have to walk across the stage in the middle of a set because its closer to your car. I know the stage looks like a nice, flat, steady place to set your drink down but when the guitar player accidentally (or not) kicks it into your lap is the temper tantrum really necessary? Some times we bring extra equipment to a show, other instruments we plan to use later and we set them along the side of the stage for quick access not so your drunk ass can come along and pretend to be a rock star by air guttering for your friends and then dropping it on the floor when your done. Hey we all get inconvenient phone calls but maybe in the future you could go outside instead of trying yell over the band? Just because you see an empty spot on the stage it doesn't mean its a dance floor. However if you do feel the need to climb on stage and flail around for a bit try being mindful of the expensive equipment that's being played all around you. Its a pain in the ass (and somewhat expensive) to have to re tube a vintage amp head because you felt like being a free spirit. Stage diving isn't as easy as it looks and its especially difficult when the audience is sitting at tables enjoying drinks with friends. Also its a wee bit distracting to every one involved while you lay there on the floor screaming and moaning about your broken nose. But isn't it fun making the band stop mid song so they can climb down off stage, help scrap your dumb ass up off the floor and call an ambulance? Being the center of attention is awesome! Jesus christ... |
F#@&ing animal crackers are straight delicious. I can't stop eating them. They're made outta chemicals and so bad for me... but they're delicious.
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The day I finally decided it was time to bathe,
the City decided to dump more chlorine into the system. The chlorine fumes pouring out of the faucet were way more toxic than mine. I'm going to drive the twenty miles & jump in the lake. No wait..the east end of the lake is only six miles from here, I'll use my bike. Less fumage. |
I'm sick of reading about all you bitter people ranting about your petty grievances.
Stop being so fucking negative all the time. |
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Okay then, I'll vent about my gratitudes.
I'm fortunate to have a dry,warm, bug-free place to sleep. I haven't gone to bed hungry since the time my father sent me to bed without supper, when I refused to eat the chicken liver mom had cooked. I am so very fortunate to have a loving mother, siblings & my dog. $783.00 dollars a month is plenty for me to live on comfortably. I have use of all four limbs. I can see & hear. The voices in my head, sing to me, of pleasant benevolent matters. I still hate the nasty chlorine though. |
I'll have much less to vent about as soon as 30% of my gross income no longer goes towards non-mortgage debt payments.
Is that un-grievance-like enough? |
I sometimes teach beginner music lessons (guitar, piano ect) for extra money and I got an actual honest to god bass student!!!! YAY!!! An adult, somebody who actually seems interested in learning more then a kick ass riff to get chicks with...good god...
I took over his lessons last week, found out where he was at and sent him home asking him to learn to play the major and minor scales, no arpeggios, open or two octave scales (although any adult with a function brain should have no trouble picking up all of that in a week with minimal practice) just major and minor...its the same finger placement for EVERY note of the scale. Anyway he shows up this evening, I ask him to run through a few scales and its pretty obvious he didn't practice so I ask him how much time he put in. "An hour a day" "Really?" "Yeah I just can't seem to get it" :rolleyes: I mean c'mon, I expect that from kids and teens but from a grown man? Just tell me you either didn't or couldn't practice, I'll go easy on you...no ruler to the knuckles or anything. I mean I don't really care, its his money we can practice scales for the next two years if he wants to pay...just a pet peeve I guess. |
Hey, Mr. "Graphic Designer" Guy Who I Don't Know at All!
When you told me you're going to have a file ready for me "soon," I didn't mind giving you the benefit of the doubt. Not at all...really. This was the first time we exchanged communications, and I like to think that my associates associate with competent people. However, when "soon" comes and goes, not much changes other than I expect to get a more specific idea of what you're talking about. So when you said I'd get the file "tomorrow," my editor brain thinks, "Tomorrow." That means "the day after today." Now let's be realistic. When "tomorrow" comes and goes and I don't hear from you at all, what am I to think? A) You forgot. B) You had other, more important, things to do. C) Something has gone terribly wrong, and you've come across something beyond your capabilities and were too embarrassed to let me know. Take a guess at what I thought. Yes, that's right, C. Because if it were A or B, you would be either a complete idiot or an asshole. But, no, it's C, which means you are irresponsible. If something's gone wrong, you tell me. You don't ignore me, leave me in the dark, hope I go away.... you fucking tell me. That way, I can do something about it, whether that means helping you or taking the project off your hands and into the hands of someone more capable. It's no coincidence that this other, more capable, person I'm thinking about is the one with the money on the line. Here's a tip: if you want to establish strong business ties, learn to take responsibility and let people know when shit isn't going according to plan. Doing otherwise only makes things worse. |
You know what?
Fuck it. Apparently, I can't drive, I'm an embarrassment out in public, I have no idea what image I project to the world, and you'd rather slam the door and go to bed than talk to me. Fine. I emptied the cat litter, vacuumed up the random pieces, ran the dishwasher, walked all the trash down to the compacter thing 1/2 mile away, told the neighbor that his interior light was on so he didn't have a dead battery tomorrow and now I'm fucking tired. You're welcome. But I don't even care. I just want a fucking shower and to go to bed. I'm glad you feel better and I love you dearly, but back the fuck off. I'm fucking exhausted and I can't sleep for shit. Quit finding fault with every word that comes out of my mouth, everything that I attempt to do, new things that I can't quite figure out, and the things that I don't do the way you want them done. I need some fucking sleep and a little less stress. I love you, good night. |
Why the fuck can't you seem to keep a car running in good shape? All you ever do is fucking text for a god damn ride when you have 3 cars that you somehow broke, yet you feel the need to ask to borrow mine when I have fucking school starting this week? Just because I may not have a job, doesn't mean you are free to think that your brother would be able to give you a ride whenever you need one cause you don't take care of your cars.
Also, your "Why not take the bus to school?" is pretty fucking funny. why don't you take the damn bus to work. Edit: Another rage. Why do you continue to bug me every single time that you log on? There hasn't been one time since you've joined the guild that you haven't sent me a whisper right after you've checked to see who was online asking for a fucking run speed buff or a Heal over time. There are other people in the guild, yet you always come to me for everything, even tradeskills that i can not do (which I've said in guild chat 3 times while you kept trying to trade me items). Then you continue to bug me in whispers while I'm currently busy as you expect me to drop what i'm doing and help you. Just fucking leave me alone FFS. (Yes, tonight is not going very well. Stressed and all i wanted to was enjoy a bit of my mmo, but got harassed with both RL and ingame bullshit. :/. Do have to say that this helps though) |
I get to sit in a room all day waiting for a bell to ring and then go to work..... Pavlovian.... But at least I get paid to do it... live is good after all.
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To the battalion sized element of tiny insects / arachnids that adorned my feet, shins, and calves with their delightful itchy kisses...
I admire you. I do. You managed to completely tear up my body below the knees through boots, pants, and socks thick enough to choke the donkey show girl. I'ma kill the shit outta you next time. I've got DEET and I'm going to wade in it before I go rucking through that patch of forest again. |
Get your own friggin' GunBroker account! It's not hard! Just sign up! I -know- they want your credit-card number, it's for security purposes! They're not going to charge your card or sell anything you paranoid, mincing little shrew of a man! It's to make sure you're an actual person and not a spam-bot!
I am sick to death of you coming in here every three weeks and asking us to use -OUR- GunBroker account, the one with our business name on it, to buy things for you! Even things, like ammo and accessories, that -DON'T- have to go to a licensed dealer! Get your own bloody GB account, bid it yourself, and get this shit shipped to your house! We'll still be perfectly happy to handle all your firearm transfers, but this is stupid! Do you realize the position you put us in by demanding this shit? If something happens to you: you die, or the tranny goes out on your car, or the hot-water-heater needs replacing...guess what? WE'RE STILL ON THE HOOK FOR YOUR PURCHASE! And if -you- are unable to COMPLETE said purchase, or you change your mind, guess what? Either we pay for a gun we didn't want, or we get bad feedback and OUR professional reputation, which is the only way we can make a living in this business, takes a big hit! And that's not even counting the fact that now I have to submit the bid, keep track of the auction, call you up every time the bid price changes to see if you want to go higher, handle -all- the communications with the seller, and deal with you coming in here every day and mincing around asking seven different times if "we're still good?" on this item! Just get your own fucking account! |
She said yes. She says no. Vanities are for parking your toothbrush.
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OK, I have something to complain about.
Mmore CD-R90 CD blanks are crap. Five years later they are unreadable. I'm transfering all my movie & tv CDs to a USB drive. Almost all the CDs are ok but a box of these particular extra long ones are not. They are failing about half way through but passed the Nero crc check when they were burned. Other brands are still good. |
1 of my gaming programmes are broken.
:( the sounds don't work on it anymore need to get someone to fix it ugg |
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