Age Differences
 

I know this topic was on the old board but now that I am back in the dating game I was curious what people think about age differences. I mean -- what do you think is to much of an age difference and how do you think age differences affect a realtionship?

My general rule: Half my age +10 years is as young as I would consider unless someone out there can provide persuasive enough evidence to do otherwise....

For me, it deals alot more with maturity. I'd go out with someone ten years younger than me, if we were close to the same maturity level. Same goes for someone older.

Any 22-year-old girl who's very wise and mature can just call me any time. :)

I don't worry too much about it - if it works it works.
I don't think I'd have much in common with folk of vastly differing ages.
I once dated a woman six years older than me and she was more concerned than I was. It was good while it lasted though.

As I said in 3.0, age means less and less as you get older. 5 years difference in your teens is a death sentence to 99% of relationships, while it is hardly noticable in your 30's and beyond.

It all has to do with maturity. My ex was 9.5 years old than me, but it didn't really matter (we broke up for many other reasons.)

It's stupid to make up a formula for these kind of things, you better take a desition from person to person.

Unless the guy was my dad's age or older, it doesn't make a difference to me either way. (Unless they aren't legal!)

wife and i are 6 years apart... when I was younger I would have never dated anyone as young as my sister... as I got older it didn't matter any longer...

I'm 26 and my girlfriend is 23...I wouldn't date anyone unless the were at least 21...As for having an older companion, age doesn't make a difference to me, it's all maturity level and personality.

My parents are 9.5 years apart--my dad was 34 and my mom was 24 when they met...it works for them. I figure you have to take it on a case by case basis.

Younger is better. I want her to be young enough to form a relationship with someone after I croak. ;-)

For me it is mostly about maturity I guess. My cousin wanted to set me up with a 27 year old (I am 25) and I refused because somewhere along the line my maturity was stunted and I just didn't think it would work.

I was 27 and my girlfriend 20 when we met. She's still the mature one :)

I've read research indicating that as men get older, they prefer women as mates who are increasingly younger than they are. Women's age preferences do not show the same pattern. Teenage men prefer women slightly older than themselves. Men in their thirties prefer women who are roughly five years younger. Men in in their fifties prefer women ten to tweny years younger. Women prefer men who are roughly 3 1/2 years older than themselves

I'd agree with Nad Adam. It should be different for everyone

It depends on the People involved and their respective ages. for instance, I am twenty one and my girlfriend is nineteen. It works well because we can relate to each other. It probably wouldn't work, or be appropriate, if she were still in high school.

I never gave it a thought before,
now I have to reconsider...........

No more 18 year olds for me.


They're all fucking nuts.

I'm not in the dating scene now but I LOVE older men. I'd date any guy even 15-20 years older than me (I'm 29) and depending on the guy I wouldn't even put a limit. I'd date younger only about 7 years. 9 years younger and I'm hitting teens. I love the maturity and experience older men have. Sure makes life in bedroom more fun.

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I prefer girls who are within 3 years younger or older than me. I have a friend who is engaged to a woman who is 15 years older than him. I wouldn't want to be him when she's all haggard and I'm relatively young.

+ or - 4 years for me.

alpha phi and i are 9 years apart so age difference to me is no big deal

I don't think it matters at all. If you want to be with someone, you should be with them, period.

This thread nailed this topic 100%. Maturity is more than just years. If you get along well, cool. If you have the maturity of a teenager, well, just make sure shes legal, ok?

My wife is two years older than me. Funny, it was a big deal when I was 17. Now that I'm 29, it just doesn't seem so important.

Troit, according to your formula, I can't be in a relationship with onodrim and we're only a year apart ;) 20/2=10, 10+10=20, onodrim=19 ;)

Anyways, most everyone in here hit it right on the head though - it varies from person to person. Generally speaking though, I'd stick within a few years.

I useally don't care about age after 16 years old, I like older women because they useally have their goals and are alittle more stable, but the girl I'm with now is younger than me 2 1/2 years and I'm just getting use to it. But if it works it works.

There is a ten year age difference between me and my S.O.
I have had moments where I wondered how she could possibly be interested in an old guy like me but it has been amazing.
She has many of the same interests as I do so the age difference means very little.

I think it more important that you are both in the same stage of life than the exact number of years. I am childless and not interested in someone with kids nearing their college years, like some my age. On the other hand, I think that she would have to have been out of school a couple of years to gain some experiences and maturity.

.... i've always been attracted to women older than I, but anyhow.. I think that most people choose by age due to maturity.. sooooooo if they say 'i can't date someone that young because we know they will be immature' is a pretty imature statement!:)

age doesn't matter. period.

Not to play the broken record but its all about maturity. I am a 19 year old male and most males around my age seem to go after younger girls. I can not STAND girls that are younger then me. I mean 18 is about the youngest I will go. Mostly because they are just so damn immature. 19-20 is about right for me as a general rule. Although I DO know a 27 year old who I would date (and it sounds kinda bad on her but we are about the same maturity... although not to toot my own horn but I like to think I am atleast a little above average) so it all depends.

Age carries way too much weight in society

I loved it last night during Six Feet Under when Ruth wouldn't stop kissing Arthur

As long as the people involved can make informed choices for themselves, I see no problems. fuck age gender race religion and get over yourself

It depends on the people. My wife is eight years older than me and we've been married for 14 years. I've never been happier. You just need to find someone that your happy to be with when your doing nothing special.

Two things to consider for me.
At university and high school there is the so called 2 year rule that everyone follows where you can't go out with anyone that studies 2 years below or above you.

Then after that i'd pretty much have a 5+ or - age difference. Anymore then that and you'll probably run into problems. Such as conversation, and different views on things such as kids blah blah becasue of the differently levels of maturity.

My general rule of thumb is that the age difference needs to be less than one-fourth the age of the younger person of the relationship. Differences greater than that mean there is less common experience on which to build a successful relationship.

As with other rules of thumb, there are exceptions. If your current relationship is one of an exception to my rule of thumb, I am truly happy for you. But I think this one would apply to most people.

That could be a problem.. considering I am a 32 year old male, who is just now entering his freshman year at college... so according to that rule, I couldnt date a junior or senior, even tho she may be 10 years younger?

Hehe, I love being a non traditional student.

As for me, I prefer someone around my own age for a steady relationship.. for that occasional romp in the hay, ideally she would be young, athletic and have big ole titties. you figure it out, cuz I never will.

Since all women seem to not like me enough i find i relate to younger girls a lot easier. Still , i never get anywhere so i guess it doesn't matter much. If it were up to girls choosing they'd think we have to share birthdays before they'd even consider me.

My wife is 10 years younger than me. We've had our share of trouble with it but worked it out. So I would say that would be the max.

+- 5 years. It all depends on the availability though, doesn't it?

the formula i use is x<18(2+ -2)x 12y = x(s)

Age is all in the mind.
I'm 31 but in my mind about 22
Atropos4 is 22 but in her mind about 31

definately a maturity thing. Ive seen guys at school who are 35 or 40 with 20-25 year old girls. I cant tell if the guys are really immature, or if the girls are really mature. I tend to lean towards the first choice though.

Leave it to secretmethod to call me out.... I was waiting for someone to do that. :D

I don't have much preference +/- 15 years would be fine with me as long as they've been though college and aren't living with their parents. It that maturatity thing.

my girlfriend is 2 1/2 years older then me - i don't mind it one bit. the youngest i've ever dated was 3 1/2 years my junior... but that was over 7 years ago... when i was young and stupid. :D

Age matters not.

Maturity, shared interests, shared goals all matter. Commitment matters.

I never pick my friends by age, why would I pick a mate by age?

the largest 10+ what a waste! it was short lived
I go with the +-5years, they seem to work the best for me.

Heck there's 10 years between my wife and I.It was really hard when we first got married.She was only 18 then.She had a lot of growing up to do and I had a lot to learn about patience.It's been 6 years now and things are going well for us.I think that age is not so much the issue as the 2 people involved.They might be 30 years apart but be perfectly happy together.You never know what you may find around the next bend.I don't think people should limit themselves like that.Your perfect mate might be right next to you but you'd never know it because she's a little older/younger then you think is acceptable.......Oh and if people give you a hard time about the difference just ignore them...That was a lesson I had to learn more then once...lol...Just my 2c.

age means absolutely nothing at all.

(only old people know this)

As the majority here have stated, it is a matter of maturity. If two consenting adults have the desire to have a relationship and they are on the same maturity level, age is not a factor in my opinion.

My wife's the older one in our relationship. And I know 3 other couples where the woman was older than the man by anywhere from 4 to 10 years. I agree with most of the posters here in that age differences when dating is all about maturity.

I think I must agree with the consensus that age is not as important as maturity (or lackthereof, whatever you're looking for).

From an evolutionist's perspective girls want men with resources. Older men have more experience which enables them to collect resources better and have had more time to gather them. Guys like young looking girls because they are perceived as more fertile and have more baby-making time ahead of them. I dont personally believe you can go by this, I think there are too many other factors.

I don't really care about age.

A persons maturity is based on more then a number.

I'm 24, and I don't see the appeal of dating someone 18 or 19. I've gotten to a certain stage in life and undergone certain experiences the caliber of which I would desire from my partner in order for them to understand my actions and motivations. 18 and 19 year-olds overwhelmingly wouldn't click with me because, from my perspective, they're still relatively "green." There's nothing wrong with that at all--but green people are happiest with green people, and more power to them. I'm just unable to cross the bridge back to my college years.

For me it doesn't matter. As long as the attraction (physical and intellectual) is there, I don't see age difference as an important issue.

I'm in the middle of a break up with a woman that's 21 years older then I am and I'm only 22. We are really on a similar level with maturity but when it comes down to it she is still twice my age. It seems that it's ok socially for a much older man to date a younger girl but I always felt weird being with this woman that's so much older. I think that an age difference of about 10 years is probably the max a couple should have. Once you go over that amount, especially when you're in your 20s, it gets a little wierd and really tough to deal with. The age difference is the main factor for our break up.

I have a 10 year rule: a woman has to be no more than 5 years older or 5 years younger, or I won't date her.

My current cutie is only a year and a half younger.

Age is simply a question of mind over matter - If you don't mind it doesn't matter.