Viking1064

I know this sounds silly, but I'd like to change the time of day I go to the bathroom. I am like clockwork, 2pm everyday. I used to go first thing in the morning. That was great. I would then jump in the shower and be all clean and fresh. (Not that I am not clean after I go at 2pm) Does anyone have any suggestions as to how I can go back to going to the bathroom in the morning? Thank you.

aberkok

Well...I'm no nutritionist, but I used to go after breakfast. For a year now, I've been drinking 2 glasses of water as soon as I get up in the morning. That usually gets things moving within about 10 minutes.

I look forward to a thread full of euphemisms.

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Siege

I drop the log(s) at random times. If the time that my ass says that it needs to be emptied isn't convenient, I hold it til it is.

Generally, unless it's a serious intestinal urge, you should be able to hold. If you constantly hold it (comfortably) til the time you want, your body should adapt.

If you really can't hold it, try to move your time slowly.

Happy poopin'!

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guthmund

I just read about this....seriously.

From what I understand...

Aberkok is right on the money. Digestion--be it two big glasses of water or a plate full of steak and eggs--gets the pipes rumbling. 10-20 minutes after feeding, your body is ready to let loose. The rest is easy: sit down, read a bit, give it a go. If nothing should happen--and I swear to all that is holy that a dozen different websites and my aunt, the registered nurse with 15 years experience in just about everything care related all agree--you should stick your finger up there and give it a go.

In fact....
All the information seems to agree that the entire "bowel retraining process" should take about 2 weeks. According to them, as long as your diet and such remain relatively stable, then you should be a regular clockwork poop machine.

Jeez...my first post of anything substantial since I don't know when and it's about poop.

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Viking1064

LOL Guthmund. Not exactly the answer I was expecting! Holy crap! I think I'll try the water and/or eating before I stick my finger up there. Thank you for the info.

guthmund

To each his own, I guess.

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Psycho Dad

I like to poop every day after lunch at work. That way I feel like I got paid for doing it.

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Sharon

The finger in the ass stimulating bowel movements doesn't exactly thrill me - I like anal play and I don't really want it to stimulate something UNSEXY.

ASU2003

I don't know, but doesn't it take 24 hours for food to go through your body? So, if you eat a big meal at breakfast, 24 hours later it will be waste. I ate a big luch today and small breakfast and dinner, so I would guess that I will go to the bathroom around noon tomorrow.

yournamehere

Over time, that's how most people get hemorrhoids.
That's exactly what you shouldn't do.

If you feel the need to go, it's because you need to GO!

If you want to get your body back in a morning cycle, why not just give yourself an enema in the morning? - that should put you right back on schedule.

Oops - forgot a euphemism:
"Drop the kids off at the pool"

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Dilbert1234567

cork? but seriously, i'm a 'when i gota go i go boat' but i think if you try to delay it by 5 or 10 minutes per day, you could eventually shift your schedule.

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Sharon

I'm guessing there's a connection to your eating habits as well... like when most of your digestion takes place. Perhaps before, you ate a heavier dinner or lunch or something, and now it's breakfast?

Baraka_Guru

Don't tell me I'm the only one here who goes two or three times a day...

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aberkok

No...certainly not. Let's hear it for fiber!!

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Baraka_Guru

Hip, hip, hooray!

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StanT

Coffee works for me. After a few years, even the smell of coffee in the morning is enough some days.

Sharon

Does coffee have a natural laxative effect?

THGL

Caffine is a diuretic, but that's the wrong side of the coin isn't it?

My wife is the same way with coffee. Half a glass and she's "be right back!"

For the euphemism list:
Takin' the Browns to the Superbowl

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Cynthetiq

I call it CIS coffee induced shit.

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abaya

Well, I'm lucky to go once a day, so when I gotta go, I gotta go...

However, I've found that if I have a big ol' glass of fiber drink-mix with dinner at night, usually things get moving by the following morning. It all depends on your particular metabolism, though. Experiment with various times of fiber consumption and see if you can't, uh, shift things around to your liking...

Either that, or get some suppositories (anyone else's mom shove those up their asses as a baby?... no? Okay, just me.)

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Pip

Eating triggers pooping since the body needs to make room in the bowels for the new food. At least that's how I figure it.

Euphemism: conducting a movement.

ngdawg

I do like Aberkok. A big glass of ice water soon as I wake up.(I also have a glass of water before bed)
Never, ever 'hold it'. You will end up constipated, which is a horrid feeling.

And I can't think of a euphemsim

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Sharon

This inevitably ends up with me waking up in the middle of the night to go to the toilet (usually only for #1 though).

Darth_Kettch

Eating any meal will get your digestive reflexes (and hormones) working to make room for the new food, so I suggest eating breakfast first thing in the morning, and go to the bathroom sometime before leaving home

Willravel

Prayer?

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ngdawg

Oddly enough, after I signed off last night, I came up with a euphemism....
'seeking a new path to 'enlightenment' '
and there's Willravel's signature^^^^ hmmmmm

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Sharon

How about "returning good food to the good earth"?

Man/Amazing

I don't poop everyday maybe every other day.....is that unhealthy?

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ngdawg

I read that whatever is comfortable is healthy, whether it's a few times a week or a couple times a day.

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yournamehere

Maybe - but a couple times a day doesn't sound comfortable to me!

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If you want to avoid 95% of internet spelling errors:
"If your ridiculous pants are too loose, you're definitely going to lose them. Tell your two loser friends over there that they're going to lose theirs, too."
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ngdawg

It isn't. And it's inconvenient...uh....bye!

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Baraka_Guru

Not necessarily. But it may depend on your diet and activity level. If you don't eat a lot of fibre (i.e. less than 20g-40g/day) and don't exercise at all, you probably should start doing so if you want to be healthier. I think a daily bowel movement is considered a healthful "norm". But you don't want to force things, of course.... egh...

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CookieCutter

coffee + oatmeal for breakfast, works everytime.

knowledgeisall

Actually not exactly true, you really shouldnt hold it in all the time but it is good to hold it in every now and then when you need to, this excercises the muscles so you wont have accidents when your older, also that does not give you hemorroids; that is from pushing and straining. it is not good to have a cycle it should be at random times and you should be able to hold it if you cant something is wrong and that is not normal.[COLOR="DarkSlateGray"]

---------- Post added at 08:23 AM ---------- Previous post was at 08:21 AM ----------

once a day is normal if more than even better it means your healthy if you poop every other day thats fine to, not a need for alarm but i dont think once a week is healthy in that case your diet would need to change.

MSD

I'm lactose intolerant, so I don't have much of a schedule. The only constant is that most of the time, I wake up late and don't have breakfast, so my digestive tract doesn't get moving in time for me to go before I shower, which annoys the hell out of me.
I double that on an average day. Even without lactose-induced megashits, I'd say 4, minimum.
Most likely. Ask your doctor.

Marlon's Mom

I average 6-7 times a day.



I've had IBS-D for the last 15 years. *sigh*

raptor9k

deleted

Vigilante

Holy crap!

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orson.octavius

i am not joking everyday during my second period physics class i have to crap and it often puts me behind. What can i do to train my body to need to go around like 6 in the morning when i wake up?

Marlon's Mom

A million years ago (pre-IBS-D), I went on a very strict, supervised diet, which included daily weigh-ins. Now, you don't want to go for your daily weigh-in carrying around a big poop in your gut, so first thing in the morning, they recommended that you nuke a cup of water mixed with a few tablespoons of lemon juice - like warm lemonade (no sugar). Worked like a charm.

Of course, at the time, I was eating VERY healthy foods - nothing pre-packaged or manufactured, no oils, no sugars, no breads, no nothin'. This may have had an impact on the ease of getting rid of things, I don't know, but give the warm lemonade thing a try and see if it helps.