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Old 08-05-2003, 11:43 AM   #41 (permalink)
Sexy eh?
 
Location: Sweden
We are all hypocrites.. Looks matter since the first impression of a person comes from the looks. Second is intelligence, deamanor and sense of humor, third is the actual personality. (At least this is the order I have noticed within me and my friends)..

To some looks matter more and to others less. That's just the way things are. Sad but true.
I don't think things are going to change anytime soon, but i can assure you that there are people going for personality rather than looks out there. Though they are hard to find.
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Old 08-05-2003, 12:23 PM   #42 (permalink)
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I don't think shallow is a good word to use in the appreciation of the opposite sex. Yes, I go for looks first, but immediately after I get past that stage, I look for assertiveness, high moral standards, intelligence, sophistication, high self-esteem, and most importantly, a sense of humor. Someone who knows she is naturally beautiful, but doesn't use it as a device to gain acceptance. I consider myself an attractive male, I am healthy, I eat well and workout on a regular basis, am educated and career oriented. It isn't too much to look for those same qualities in a partner. Yes, beauty is only skin deep, but one has to start somewhere.
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Old 08-05-2003, 12:52 PM   #43 (permalink)
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Old 08-05-2003, 12:58 PM   #44 (permalink)
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Location: Davey's
As far as the crush thing goes. To me a crush is a very fragile thing, usually based on looks and, maybe a couple things. I have a crush on Meg White of the White Stripes. Why? 'Cause she's cute and plays the drums. Finding out anymore about her might crush the crush. If I found out she smoked crack, liked to start small fires or still had a big Barbie collection, those might be deal breakers for me. Crush over.

So, as far as I'm concerned, seeing someone's picture on the internet and thinking their attractive is understandable. Getting to know them and STILL finding them attractive is another story all together.

As far as attractiveness goes, it truely is in the eye of the beholder. Some girls that are supposedly "hot" hold zero interest for me. I like red hair, glasses and girls who read. Lots of guys don't. It all depends on personal tastes. In the long run though, personality and intellegence go much further with me than the face and body. That's just me.
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Old 08-05-2003, 03:05 PM   #45 (permalink)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
 
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Location: Charleston, SC
I am really enjoying reading this. I like how all of you explain yourselves and your views on this.

It is great to see such a variety of answers.
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Old 08-05-2003, 08:30 PM   #46 (permalink)
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Location: 33:08:12N 117:10:23W
There is a high level of anonymity on the web and people do act more basal (including me). And there’s not anything necessarily wrong with that. It’s the attitude of: “This isn’t real life – if you think I’m immature, I’ll likely never know about it. And if it truly troubles me, I can become someone else.”

At the time of this writing, the ratio of people who have viewed this thread to those who have posted a reply is about 25:1.

Doing a random look at others in the General Discussion section, a rough average is about 8:1.

Having a subject of "Hey, look at this hot chic!!" was an experiment, wasn't it.
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Old 08-05-2003, 09:12 PM   #47 (permalink)
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Location: Melbourne
Looks matter. Period.

Individual definitions of what "looks" appealing differ, but no-one would be attracted to anyone if they did not put any emphasis on physical attraction.

Personality is part of physical attraction. One's personality is reflected in how they present themselves to the world.
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Old 08-06-2003, 12:35 AM   #48 (permalink)
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Location: Tulsa, OK
Anyone who argues that human males like hot chicks because of instincts is just coping out. While I agree that animal instincts are the basis for human beings' liking attractive people more than unattractive people, I also believe that humans are unique in our abilities to go beyond what we're prewired with. Our intellects allow us to look beyond these primal urges and look for other good qualities in the people we like to be around.
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Old 08-06-2003, 02:40 AM   #49 (permalink)
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Hey, the title of this thread is really clever! You sure tricked me! It seems as if I was thinking with my penis rather than with my brain! Imagine that, ahahahaa!!!

Your complaining about how people are shallow and hypocritical about it is pretty stupid, no offense. Everyone is shallow.

PS> I like boobies.
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Old 08-06-2003, 05:31 AM   #50 (permalink)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
 
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Location: Charleston, SC
Quote:
Originally posted by Bantha

Your complaining about how people are shallow and hypocritical about it is pretty stupid, no offense. Everyone is shallow.

Who said I was complaining?? This is a discussion.

Also I think that if you read the responses here you will learn that not everyone is shallow.
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Old 08-06-2003, 08:11 AM   #51 (permalink)
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While you could make the argument that it's just bad genes, generally the way someone looks is a big personality pointer to me - how they look or try to look can indicate a lot of things. If they care about putting themselves together, that can say a lot.

And then of course, there's the more visual stimulation. Yeah, the mind is important, but like somebody said - the outside is what makes you want to look inside. And for me, a good piece of that is what I mentioned above.
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Old 08-06-2003, 09:22 AM   #52 (permalink)
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Location: About 70 pixals above this...
Hal, with another quip, brings up a great point: Humans are attracted to beauty. What is human beauty? Symmetry and scale. All babies recognize when they are shown a deformed face because the symmetry and proportion of the features is off. Why? Good genetics. Skinny? bad thing for most people who do not watch TV and read People®. Fat people (not plump or "healthy" as i call it)? Bad. Shortens life and it is noted in our subconscious as such, i believe. The focus on personality is is probably from the understanding that if their is more of an attraction, the genetics will be more surly passed on (they will not cheat). Probably so many more. That is why sports people are so attractive to so many people. they are HEALTHY.

One question? why would any man want a weak woman? is it the "i can protect" thing or is it also the ability to rule over her? I have to say, i like that my fiancee is cut and could nearly take me down if she wanted to (i have more body mass and had an older brother, i don't go down easily. er... THAT way i don't. ).

.5 cent.
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Old 08-06-2003, 09:26 AM   #53 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: About 70 pixals above this...
In response to Elitegibsen, i would have to agree. But to say that you can control everything that has been prewired for thousands/millions o years is a bit presumptuous and prideful. It is always on the underside of our decision making and knowing it is a good way to make your own autonomous decisions.
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Old 08-06-2003, 03:34 PM   #54 (permalink)
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I am probably not qualified to be commenting in this thread. I have been married nearly 15 years, and can hardly remember my pursuing days. :-)

My personal take on this, however, is mixed. I think physical attraction (purposefully not using the term "physical beauty") is part of an initial contact. Beyond that a person becomes attractive as a whole. Body, mind, and being.

I also realize that I could never be seriously (more than girl watching) attracted to any woman who I did not already know as a person. I just can't see that happening for me. My wife and I knew each other as classmates and friends and had spent a lot of time together before I started having romantic thoughts about her.

Also I know that I find myself disliking women who seem to have the attitude of "I am pretty - therefore the world revolves around me." I do not enjoy spending time with these types of people.

Just my thoughts at the moment on this topic.
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Old 08-06-2003, 03:40 PM   #55 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Gastonia NC
I like seeing pics of people I talk to online. Not because I want to slobber over pics of online babes (my wife would kill me if I did) but because I like putting a face with a name. I as frequently ask to see pics of guys as pics of girls.

To be honest I don't think I've seen a pic of any girl who posts here. Probably not any boy apart from Halx either.
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Old 08-06-2003, 03:43 PM   #56 (permalink)
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Location: Gastonia NC
then again, my tastes are probably very different from other people. I honestly think my wife is the most beautiful woman I've ever met (and I'm not just saying that because we're married). I'm sure I'd think some people here were very pretty, and some would leave me cold.
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Old 08-06-2003, 03:56 PM   #57 (permalink)
Upright
 
Location: East Coast
I wish I had more time tonight to finish reading all the posts, BUT I dont! I will say only this.. for someone to be shallow, he/she has to appear shallow! seeing a Beautiful woman and complimenting that woman doesnt make someone shallow.. I agree with most that I did read in saying that it is natural for mammals to be "guided" if you will toward an attractive mate.. Beauty is only skin deep though, so if you are looking for a beautiful woman first and foremost to spend your life with, THEN git ur wurkin boots on boy! cause you got a long job ahead of ya!! Formerly Lonely!! Only
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Old 08-06-2003, 06:09 PM   #58 (permalink)
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*Nikki*, for the record, I must say, you have a lot of class.
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