12-13-2004, 01:10 PM | #41 (permalink) | |
Getting it.
Super Moderator
Location: Lion City
|
Quote:
__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke |
|
12-13-2004, 01:35 PM | #42 (permalink) | |
Junkie
Location: Toronto
|
Quote:
I'm curious about who ate the oatmeal afterwards.... I would have expected some brown sugar with it at the very least! |
|
12-13-2004, 02:41 PM | #43 (permalink) |
Getting it.
Super Moderator
Location: Lion City
|
I can't remember if I ate it or threw it away... probably the latter.
__________________
"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars." - Old Man Luedecke Last edited by Charlatan; 07-28-2005 at 10:28 AM.. |
12-13-2004, 03:22 PM | #44 (permalink) | |
Psycho
Location: Comfy Little Bungalow
|
Quote:
Or as Pinkie would say, would you like some plantain with that? Peace, Pierre
__________________
--- There is no such thing as strong coffee - only weak people. --- |
|
12-14-2004, 05:21 AM | #45 (permalink) |
Insane
|
Omega, thanks for the lovely animation - unfortunately I think it'll stick in my mind forever
__________________
'Everything that can be invented has been invented.- - 1899, Charles Duell, U.S. Office of Patents. 'There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.' - Ken Olson, 1977, Digital Equipment Corporation |
12-14-2004, 10:58 AM | #47 (permalink) |
Insane
Location: MD
|
Not really weird but, one time my wife was sleeping and her mouth was hanging wide open. While I was looking at her, the little light bulb went on. You all know what my plan was. Well, I decided to stick my finger in her mouth first to see what her reaction would be. CLAMP! Holy crap! She was biting so hard I couldn't get my finger out. My finger was bleeding by the time I managed to pry it loose. She never woke up and I'm sure she wasn't awake because I told her about it the next day and she thought it was hilarious. It was very scary and I learned my leason. I was almost minus my most valuable member.
__________________
I shake the devil's hand daily... I'd do it hourly, but my hand gets tired. |
12-14-2004, 11:02 AM | #48 (permalink) | |
More anal, less shenanigans
Location: Always lurking
|
Quote:
Ouchie.
__________________
. |
|
12-14-2004, 04:54 PM | #49 (permalink) |
Insane
Location: Boston, MA
|
Vacum cleaner (would not recomend....ever), Super soaker water fill hole, and a watermelon.
I kinda liked the watermelon but you need to make sure you make the hole the right size. It is also very sticky...I am not sure if I want to put this into writing but hey give it a try if it sounds interesting.
__________________
I suffer from amnesia and deja vu at the same time... I think I have forgotten this before |
12-14-2004, 09:30 PM | #50 (permalink) |
Crazy
|
I shouldn't have to say this, but I will as a pubilic servive anouncement. Always exercise extreme caution if you are going to microwave some fruit for humping. They can get *very* hot. I would suggest sticking your thumb into the hole first. The last thing one want is burns on his penis.
Also, there is too much friction to use tube socks plain. Stick a latex glove (you can get a box of 100 gloves for like $10.) in the middle of the sock. The fold the glove down over the sides of the sock and pour a little lube in it and you're good to go. The strangest thing I've used however... A fake rabbit fur. |
12-14-2004, 09:42 PM | #51 (permalink) | |
WaterDog
|
Quote:
omg... i can't believe i read that.... ::cringes and turns away from pc::
__________________
...AquaFox... |
|
12-18-2004, 08:57 PM | #53 (permalink) |
Upright
|
Ever notice how it seems that every bottle that has ever been manufactured is never the right size? Its like a safety feature they never mention.
Anywho, I found a juice bottle thingy (soft plastic, screw on lid), and top top is shorta shaped like >< with a cap on top so you cut off the part with the threads, making sure you wont get caught on anything, then you poke a hole in the bottom of the container, giving it just enough suction to make it interesting. Yeah, us guys are crazy. |
12-20-2004, 12:09 PM | #55 (permalink) | |
Semi-Atomic
Location: Home.
|
Quote:
......I...can't believe...I read that. That's...horrible...and... a really well written story...and just horrible. I always knew there was something wrog with those guys from the Navy....
__________________
Someday, someone will best me. But it won't be today, and it won't be you. |
|
12-20-2004, 12:14 PM | #56 (permalink) | ||
Devoted
Donor
Location: New England
|
Quote:
Quote:
__________________
I can't read your signature. Sorry. |
||
01-17-2005, 05:14 PM | #61 (permalink) |
Natalie Portman is sexy.
Location: The Outer Rim
|
holy shit. That "guts" story was gross. My stomach is hurting from just reading it.
__________________
"While the State exists there can be no freedom. When there is freedom there will be no State." - Vladimir Ilyich Lenin "Reason has always existed, but not always in a reasonable form."- Karl Marx |
01-27-2005, 04:34 AM | #65 (permalink) |
It's All About The Ass!!
Location: In a pool of mayonnaise!!
|
^ Just for shits n giggles last time I was at the grocery store I looked at all the banana's. Not a one of them looked big enough for me to actually fit my dick in it without it peeling open even if I wanted to. I don't see how guys can do that.
Asta!!
__________________
"I love music and it's my parents fault (closing statement)." - Me..quoting myself...from when I said that...On TFP..thats here...Tilted Forum Project It ain't goodbye, it's see ya later! I'll miss you guys! - Asta!! |
01-29-2005, 03:53 PM | #68 (permalink) |
Loves green eggs and ham
Location: I'm just sittin' here watching the world go round and round
|
that story was un-fucking-believable!! cool!
Hand guy myself but to each his own I guess.
__________________
If you're travelling at the speed of light, and you turn the headlights on, do they do anything? My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die! Drink Dickens' Hard Cider because nothing makes a girl smile like a Hard DIckens' Cider! |
01-31-2005, 05:35 PM | #72 (permalink) |
Thank God hockey is back
Location: Deeeeeetroit
|
Guts is so great. I read that about a year ago. i love that story...and just for the record, its not THAT sick. He was reading that to promote one of his books (diary i think...) and they were having people pass out at nearly every reading, by the end of the tour he'd have to give a disclaimer and then on top of that stop before the really bad parts and warn people and tell them that it was their chance to leave.
__________________
A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools. -Douglas Adams |
01-31-2005, 06:41 PM | #73 (permalink) |
Psycho
Location: inside my own mind
|
ah yes guts....hee
I love chuck choke is another place where he tells some less sick masterbation legends although it probably is my least favorite work of his.(one has to do with a vacuum cleaner.)
__________________
A damn dirty hippie without the dirty part.... |
01-31-2005, 08:20 PM | #74 (permalink) |
Insane
Location: NYC
|
Lol, I couldn't help but to laugh while reading these posts. Very interesting, too bad I don't have a penis. But if I were a man and had a penis, I think I'd use one of those gelly candles in the cup, those feel almost like the real thing. I'd go to the store and always stick my fingers into them, just can't help it. :-p
|
02-05-2005, 07:52 PM | #79 (permalink) |
young and in bloom
Location: under the bodhi tree.... *bling*
|
oh god, i laughed to hard, my sides hurt.
this takes the cake on TFP! congrats! i feel compelled to start a thread now!
__________________
"Woke up this morning with a blue moon in my eye" ~A3 "woke up this morning" "Don't compromise yourself, you're all you've got." -Janis Joplin |
Tags |
cock, put, strange, things |
|
|