Xerxys

I am a doublestandard bigot, and I have no problem with that, absolutely nothing done to another man. I have had an orppotunity and I passed out!!

Ohh, I understand how I tick :-D

Willravel

I've been known to hug it out from time to time. It's like wearing a pink dress shirt, if you're confident and you don't get a semi, you're still straight.

Starkizzer

I'm excited to see this thread finally take off. It has been quite an interesting read and I give a big round of applause to the men who have been willing to share their stories with us.

Thanks for the eye opening read and making my mind wander to naughty places, men I love you all!

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abaya

Hear, hear. I really admire and respect the men who are opening up about their past experiences... that takes serious maturity.

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And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

Cynosure

I've never engaged in anything sexual with another man. However, as a boy and in my early teens, I did some things.

(Hmm. It's been many years since I thought about this... )

When I was 11, around the time my parents were getting a divorce, I kissed my best friend, full on the lips. I don't know why, exactly; I was acting on an impulse of affection, and it was totally from out of nowhere, seemingly. We were riding his bike, and I was seated on the handlebars, and I kissed him just after we rolled to a stop and I grabbed onto his shoulders for support. I remember he had blonde hair and blue eyes; and even now, some 30 years later, I can still see his face.

Sometimes, this friend and I stripped naked and ran through the woods, together. We pretended we were survivors of a shipwreck or something, and thus we had become wild boys. There was no touching of each other, nor was there any focus on our genitals, while we played. And yet there was a sexual element about it.

Months later, the remnants of my family moved away, to another city. A couple of years after that, when I was 13, I got to go spend a weekend with my former best friend, who I hadn't seen for over a year. (During our time apart, we wrote each other, a couple of times. But those letters were merely about boyhood interests, such as comic books and TV shows, and had no affection in them that I can recall.) One night, while we were lying in his bed together and talking about stuff, our conversation turned to the subject about girls, and then about sex. That's when my friend told me about anal intercourse, and how "it felt just like having sex with a girl", and that we should try it. The idea was totally new to me, and sounded interesting; and since, at that time, I had hardly any misgivings about homosexuality impressed upon me by society and/or religion, I consented, and we gave it a try. Only, there was no full penetration, and neither of us orgasmed.

After that weekend, we ended up never seeing each other again, and eventually we fell out of contact with each other. I don't know if he grew up to be bi-sexual or a homosexual, or what. Myself, I grew up to be heterosexual. I've never participated in any homosexual activity, since then, nor have I really been tempted to. (Although, in my early to late 20's, on several occassions, I had some unwanted attention from gays, and at least one of them was quite overt about it.) Once I began kissing females, and eventually having sex with them, I never really looked back.

lotsofmagnets

respect!

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mother nature made the aeroplane, and the submarine sandwich, with the steady hands and dead eye of a remarkable sculptor.
she shed her mountain turning training wheels, for the convenience of the moving sidewalk, that delivers the magnetic monkey children through the mouth of impossible calendar clock, into the devil's manhole cauldron.
physics of a bicycle, isn't it remarkable?

hotdog690

I really enjoy giving deep blowjobs and taking deephroat cum. I tried taking anal once and found it interesting. I could feel every ripple in the guy's prick as it went in. Might be interesting to do it again, but not often. I much prefer taking equipment over 6 inches and on the slim side. It makes taking it deep a lot easier, but it's amazing the number of small cocks out there.

I don't consider myself gay, my activity is purely for sexual gratification. No kissing, hugging etc. Try it, you might just like it.

Milnoc

When I was seventeen, I was an angry teenager who trusted no one and who nearly everyone hated. I really had no friends back then. Still, I somehow managed to almost have a gay sexual encounter with a male classmate. But the most that happened is the guy showed me his package in full bloom. I never showed him mine, but I was being aroused by the experience mainly because no one had ever showed any sincere interest in me at that time, either male or female. I do believe he was gay because he was coming on to me big time as if this wasn't his first attempt. But he never forced himself upon me, and I've never felt as if the experience was weird, uncomfortable, or anything else. It did make me ask some serious questions about my sexuality though, but I believe a lot of teenagers go through that. You just have to ride it out.

I'm a bit worried he feels bad about the experience after all these years, mistakenly believing he was pushing me into something I didn't want to do. If by some miracle I ever meet up with him again and he tries to apologize, I'll stop him and give him a big hug. Maybe even a kiss so that he understands I'm perfectly all right and that the experience didn't scar me one damn bit.

I've always preferred women over men, and I still do to this day. (Very tasty! Please sit on my face! ) But if ever the right guy comes along, who knows? I might try it just to find out what it feels like. However, I doubt very much I'll ever fall in love with a guy. I find the feminine mannerisms of most gay men to be completely out of place with their gender. It may be an old-fashioned stereotype, but that's how I feel.

Halx

How do you get yourself into these situations? I'm assuming you hang out in gay-friendly venues. How often do you go looking for this kind of gratification?

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hotdog690

I do DVD recordings of couples, groups etc. at their request. I advertise.
About half my clients are gay or bisexual and I join in if I'm invited. Some ladies really get off on seeing their partners getting blowed well. I think it's a lot of fun.

Halx

That's a very interesting business. *cogs turning in head* Well, thank you very much for sharing.

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-The Administrator
[Don't Feed The Animals]

Daniel_

+1

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Prince

For a short period of time in my early teens, when my best (and only) friend and I were starting to discover sexuality, we blew each other every so often. Neither of us is gay, and I don't see myself as a bisexual either, for that matter. I don't think it was experimentation. I think it was just that we lived in the middle of nowhere, were constantly bored, and the Internet and stuff like that didn't exist for regular consumers, so it was a combination of that and needing to do something about that hard-on.

I have to say I'm not ashamed of it, nor is it uncomfortable to talk about. It's just one of those things, part of growing up.

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Logarithm

I normally lurk almost exclusively, but I feel somewhat compelled to but in this thread.

I had known my best friend as a kid since I was about five. We always stayed over at each others' houses and slept in the same bed. Our parents would let us take bubble baths together. Early on, there wasnt anything explicitly sexual about it, but I remember always getting boners in the bath and poking each other (and popping it out of the bubbles and pretending it was a submarine )

Around twelve, we started fondling each other in bed, though we didnt jack each other off at that age. By junior high, we were giving each other blow jobs. We tried anal sex a couple times, but it always hurt me too much, probably because we never had any proper lube.

We rarely hang out anymore, and havent talked about sex, but I think we'd both be willing to try it again. I have no interest in the gay lifestyle (though I completely support gays) but I'm definitely interested in the sex end of it.

Martian

Like many of the men here, I have never done anything sexual with another man. I've never felt the urge; I have looked at some men and seen in a sort of detached way that they're attractive, but the gottahaveit that I feel when I see a beautiful woman was never there.

I'm beginning to think that labels like 'homosexual' and 'heterosexual' are a bit outdated; they seem to be defining things that are no longer relevant and, depending on who you talk to, don't really exist. Some dudes like to bang other dudes, some dudes like to bang chicks. Some dudes go back and forth, and I suspect a larger number of dudes than any internet survey reveals have at least tried the alternative. Granted, it's funny to say that right after revealing that I myself never have, but I just get that feeling.

You do what makes you happy. If you're not hurting anyone else, I don't see how it matters. If I ever did feel the urge and had a partner available, I'm certain I'd have no qualms. I also wouldn't feel the need to shout it from the rooftops.

When you get right down to it, sex is mundane. Everybody does it, it happens every day. It's not really all that different from me taking a shower or brushing my teeth, except that it requires a partner and that there still seems to be a certain titillation derived from it, due to it's history as something that's forbidden in polite company.

I find it interesting, though, that even here in this group of largely socially progressive individuals there still seems to be a bit of a stigma attached to male homosexuality. People feel the need to proclaim 'I'm not gay,' as if it's some kind of disease. You really can't blame any man for such things; it's a knee-jerk reaction, drilled into us by years of playground shenanigans. It does make me wonder if we have, as a global community, come as far as we think we have. It's particularly puzzling when one considers that there's no such stigma attached to the female equivalent; or at least, not to the same degree if it is there.

And for the record, the idea of two chicks gettin' it on does nothing for me.

/musings

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I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame

jewels

I always wonder why TFP always fights for gay rights but when a thread like this comes along, everyone responds with a close-but-not-quite homophobic tone.

It saddened me to hear this, though, Martian. I hope you don't mean that literally.

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Bill O'Rights

Well...from a somewhat "older" perspective, I'll tell you that there is still a stigma, although not as great a one as there used to be. I think that people tend to be more understanding, if not actually accepting, of homosexuality. I, for example, could not possibly care less what two consenting adults do, in the privacy of their own bedroom. It doesn't affect me, it doesn't invole me, it doesn't even phase me. That doesn't mean that I want to see public displays of affection. I'm...just not there yet. That's for the next generation to deal with, and you are.

Wonder no more. We most certainly have not. Oh, we like to pat ourselves on the back and congratulate ourselves over how progressive that we are. But, I don't think that we are really as progressive as we like to believe that we are. Not think...believe. Remember the Seinfeld routine..."He's gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that." Society still has much growing up to do.

It's a double standard, sure. Fair? No. Not by a long shot, I'm sure. But the simple fact is...two girls...big turn on for old BOR here. Two guys? Ummm...no. Not at all. So, because I'm far from alone in that regard, we allow the women to explore that side of themselves. We actually encourage it. Hell, we'll even pay them to do it.

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"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony

"Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus

It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.

Lasereth

This thread is incredible. This is a perfect example of why TFP is the best forum I've been to on the Internet and why I love this place.

One time I spent the night at a friend's house when I was 10. He was 12 or 13 and took his pants off and joked about sticking his penis inside. Except he wasn't joking and he was serious. I sorta ignored it and went to bed but I found it very interesting that he was comfortable with trying without knowing at all if I was interested. I'm not positive but I'm pretty sure he turned out to be gay when we grew up.

braisler

Right, and if the double standard is to be defeated maybe more women should be as open as men have been/are about encouraging or allowing the flip side of this behavior in men. I think that there are a good number of women who, at least occasionally, enjoy the fantasy of seeing two men together. If more women shared this fantasy with the men in their lives (think about the now fairly commonplace woman-woman fantasy for men), then the reality of male to male sexual contact might have less of a stigma attached.

With respect to the initial purposes of the thread: When I was a child of 8 or so, I had a good friend who I hung out with. We touched each other out of curiosity. We drifted apart as our families moved away and never kept in touch. As an adult, I haven't had any male-male contact. I'd entertain the idea in the right situation for the sexual gratification aspect. I'm not really into the idea of kissing or holding hands with a guy, but I would be happy to try giving and receiving oral if the situation presented itself.

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---
You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.
- Albert Einstein
---

skizziks

I may have gotten a blowjob from a guy, not sure. It was in Thailand.

abaya

My impression is the problem is not with women not being "open" enough... it's with men condemning or making fun of each other (or worse, killing each other) for this kind of behavior. We had a bit of that going on at the beginning of the thread as well, right here. I'm not saying that every woman is going to open to this kind of thing, but I doubt that it's usually women who have the physically violent reactions towards this behavior that it usually gets from men.

I think the double standard is more from the men's side than the women's, particularly since men are the primary consumers of porn, and it's often within porn where things get decided as being either "mainstream" or "wayside." Chicks banging each other is mainstream/hotness; guys doing it is fringe (and being male and gay is still seen as "fringe," instead of mainstream) and therefore gets channeled into the "gay only" section. Straight men won't touch it. That's a double standard, if you ask me.

__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

Amaras

I did the exploration, "you show me yours, I'll show you mine" in my pre-teen years. I think that's pretty normal.
No orgasms or penetration, but exploration nonetheless.
In my late twenties I was HEAVILY involved in the drug scene, and engaged in many types of sexual activity.
I performed oral sex on a few guys, no anal sex. It was fun, at the time. I also slept with about 60+ women
during a 3 year period. Threesomes, one night stands, and so on.....
I don't think of myself as bi-, more like "sex" friendly.
I prefer the softness of women. They are MUCH better kissers, in my opinion.
It was fun, but I'm in a committed relationship and funny enough, I don't like fooling around.
I've always said though, if I like someone, it's doesn't really matter their gender/type, I'll try to be honest about
it, at least to myself.

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Bill O'Rights

I think...you are absolutely dead spot on correct with this observation. Hence, the sad demise of pubic hair. The porn industry, it seems, is not only highly profitable, it's also extremely powerful as well.

__________________
"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony

"Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus

It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.

abaya

Thank you for saying this, BoR. It's nice to hear it from a man, actually. Not that I don't value porn, either (it helped me get off just the other day, quite nicely)--but just like any other entertainment, if one doesn't view it with a critical mind to its pervasive biases/marketing, it definitely has the power to influence one's idea of what is not only "normal" and acceptable, but what is ideal... and that is even more dangerous, if you ask me. (Pubic hair is the least of my worries, in that sense.) And really, what percentage of porn consumers are thinking critically about anything, in the middle of jacking off?

__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

beavstrokinoff

69, anal (both catching and pitching) I liked it. I haven't had the opportunity to do it again but if it arose I would.

Jozrael

I was raised in a Christian household forbidding sexual acts of any sort. I believe I'm at least bi-curious now, if not bisexual. However, I got with my current girlfriend at pretty much the same time I left the influence of that Christian household, and she helped me to develop my sexuality (throw off those old chains).

However, she's very mono-amory, and so long as I'm with her, I will have zero option to experiment with the same sex (much as I'd love to) or for that matter any female either (less inclination there since I already have a fabulous one). My attachment to my SO is far stronger than my (considerable) desires to experiment with the other sex, but that didn't stop me from hesitating when I naively stumbled into the bed of a gay man who was quite horny. Nothing happened, but I still could've exited the situation quicker.

<.< >.> yep that's about it.

Jove

The usual hug, pat on the shoulder, punch on the arm or hand shake.

Anormalguy

I agree with the above statement.

I don't see the homophobia (as I define it), not even borderline, that others have mentioned.

I do agree that there is a double standard regarding male sexuality and female sexuality, & that society in general has a long way to go accepting male homosexuality & bi-sexuality.

I have noticed, or think that I've noticed, that over the past ten years or so male bi-sexuality has become more common in erotica/written pornography.

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jewels

You're absolutely right and I take back my original comment. I hadn't had time to read the posts since yesterday morning, and there were quite a few denials.

I think it's normal for anyone to be curious about the same sex, even when they're straight, so to see outright denial really made me wonder.
-----Added 14/11/2008 at 06 : 57 : 52-----
You're absolutely right and I take back my original comment. I hadn't had time to read the posts since yesterday morning, and there were quite a few denials.

I think it's normal for anyone to be curious about the same sex, even when they're straight, so to see outright denial really made me wonder. I add to the kudos to those of you who aren't afraid to talk about it.

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Frosstbyte

I have some other thoughts about this thread that I'm going to post later, but just as a quick response to jewels, I think that there's a difference between curious or capable of evaluating attractiveness and having done anything or having any real interest in making the curiosity a reality. I don't know that the outright denials say that they're totally incapable of appreciating an attractive guy and/or haven't wondered what it'd be like more than they simply state that there's no desire to actualize that thought, which I think is also perfectly normal.

jewels

Agreed.

__________________
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
Mark Twain

Martian

I don't mean to imply that I don't enjoy sex. Quite the contrary, I'm a huge fan. I just don't understand why everyone gets so hung up about it. Sex is ordinary. Nearly everybody does it, and everybody thinks about it. So far as I'm able to determine the whole 'dirty' side of it stems from our mothers and mothers' mothers telling us that it's bad and wrong. It's not any more bad or wrong than any of the activities I mentioned.

I don't know if I would classify the responses as homophobic, precisely. And as much as I often find myself disagreeing with abaya's semi-militant feminism, in this case I have to give it to her; we definitely do it to ourselves.

I offended a young man the other day. I don't remember what the slight was, although I'm certain it wasn't intentional. His response was to call me a homo; this was, apparently, the worst thing he could think of to call me. I wish I could say that such thinking is isolated, but experience has taught me otherwise. We've all grown past it now, but I seem to recall my step brothers and I would frequently use gay as a derogatory term in our younger days. I know a number of folks who still do, and there seems to be a correlation between them and the individuals who are quick to deny any homosexual tendencies.

I don't think such behaviour is necessarily homophobic. I think Mr. O'Rights, who by the way deserves kudos for being quite up front about it, serves as an example; if I'm reading his post correctly, it would seem that he's perfectly okay with homosexuality, so long as it's not happening anywhere near him. I don't think he's the only one who thinks that way here, but he's been the first to own it. I tend to think of this as a median attitude; as one sheds the culturally-instilled homophobia and moves towards tolerance, one goes through a phase where one can intellectually accept homosexuality but still feels the visceral negative response when confronted with it in the real world. I don't know what's required to move past that phase, but I know a lot of people never do.

For the record, I'm not really bothered by two men making out in public. I don't particularly want to see it, but then I don't particularly want to see a man and a woman making out in public either. Some activities are meant to be private.

One of Magpie's best friends is gay. She complains about the double standard discussed above. She feels that a lot of women (particularly but not exclusively young ones) claim to be bisexual because those women feel that it will increase their attractiveness in the eyes of men. She feels that this in turn belittles the young women like herself who are truly gay, and I can sort of see her point. While I'm all for people exploring their sexuality, I don't think this is how it ought to be. One should perform such exploration for one's own benefit, and not for the benefit of anybody else. Consequently, I'm reasonably sure that pornography is worsening the issue, rather than bettering it.

More thoughts: labels beget segregation. In order to solve a problem, we must identify it. This requires identifying and defining the components of the problem and the very act of definition mandates a label. Social problems, however, create a thorny situation. Without the labels, we can't truly identify the problem. Yet at the same time, the labels magnify the problem. If we say this gay man and that gay man want to have a gay marriage, then we can tell them no. If we take out the label and simply say these two men want to have a marriage, it becomes much more difficult to justify the denial.

Are the labels the problem? Are they part of the solution? Or are they simply another intermediate stage?

No answers, just more questions as usual.

__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame

Brad1989

Damn this room is up tight so I will answer. Circle jerked a few time in the locker room after the game. Almost the entire team did it and it happened a few times. I'm straight. Its just a teen thing and I am not ashamed of it and would tell any body it.

FuglyStick

Slugged a few, and got slugged in return. It wasn't foreplay.

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$eabas$

i havent done anything at all, im as straight as it gets

icevrething

when i was 12 i was involved in a circle jerk with the neighborhood kids. At that same age I also gave and received a bj with 1 of my best friends who later killed himself (unrelated to this incident). It was just something to do, and as kids we saw it as exploration and fun.

__________________

Brad1989

I helped wax my best friends body for a bodybuilding contest. Nothing sexual and it was gross. Us guys are just to damn hair. LOL I did feel gay as hell doing it even though it wasn't a turn on for either of us. Just was weird.