BooHoo type stuff - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

SpikeQX99 · 08-08-2004, 12:51 AM

I was just scribbling out some stuff tonight about a girl I know, and this is what fell out of the pen... Hope you all enjoy it...

Seasons pass. Love fades away. we grow apart. With the passing of each waking moment, comes the longing for your touch, until it is realized that you've moved along your path in life and I'm still waiting, like the dog for it's owner for you to return to me. but you never do, and finally with a heavy heart
and a final heave of my chest
I curl up alone, and sleep a lonely existence.
But sleep won't come on this restless night, the vampires of regret sucking at my mind

Could I have kept you? What did I do? Does she still think about me?

All are questions that I ask as I fade into oblivion...

Just know that as I pass that you are and will be on my mind and in my heart..

CheeseButtons · 08-08-2004, 01:53 AM

You are a good poet

xeem · 08-08-2004, 06:41 AM

Quote:

the vampires of regret sucking at my mind

awesome

Sue · 08-08-2004, 06:45 AM

Geezus Spike you literally just described what happened to me in the beginning of July...

SpikeQX99 · 08-08-2004, 11:30 AM

When I keep my mind off of it and just let the pen work with the subconsious mind, stuff like that happens, but if i don't then i get all sorts of rhymes.

I like the automatic stuff I do. Thanks for the feedback. It's appreciated.

fallenangel · 08-10-2004, 08:55 PM

way too familiar, it's a bit eery. Great writing Spike

Blonddie · 08-10-2004, 08:57 PM

That's really good. Excellent metaphors.....

SpikeQX99 · 08-11-2004, 01:34 AM

too familiar? that's strange, seems like this really hit it on the head for a lot of people.

It's kinda creepy to me, because I'm not normally writing like that. I just can't sit and say, "I'm gonna write poetry". I end up with all kinds of goofy rhymes and all that. Sounds more like a rap song that what I actually feel.

I'm glad that people connect with this for whatever reason.

08-08-2004, 12:51 AM	#1 (permalink)
SpikeQX99 The Best thing that never happened to you Location: Silverdale, WA	BooHoo type stuff I was just scribbling out some stuff tonight about a girl I know, and this is what fell out of the pen... Hope you all enjoy it... Seasons pass. Love fades away. we grow apart. With the passing of each waking moment, comes the longing for your touch, until it is realized that you've moved along your path in life and I'm still waiting, like the dog for it's owner for you to return to me. but you never do, and finally with a heavy heart and a final heave of my chest I curl up alone, and sleep a lonely existence. But sleep won't come on this restless night, the vampires of regret sucking at my mind Could I have kept you? What did I do? Does she still think about me? All are questions that I ask as I fade into oblivion... Just know that as I pass that you are and will be on my mind and in my heart.. __________________ I'm so in love with a girl... she is my everything

08-08-2004, 01:53 AM	#2 (permalink)
CheeseButtons Crazy Location: 1000 miles from nowhere	You are a good poet __________________ Sorrow is better than laughter, because a sad face is good for the heart. -Ecclesiastes 7:3

08-08-2004, 06:45 AM	#4 (permalink)
Sue Teufel Hunden's Freundin Location: Westminster, CO	Geezus Spike you literally just described what happened to me in the beginning of July... __________________ Teg yw edrych tuag adref.

08-08-2004, 11:30 AM	#5 (permalink)
SpikeQX99 The Best thing that never happened to you Location: Silverdale, WA	When I keep my mind off of it and just let the pen work with the subconsious mind, stuff like that happens, but if i don't then i get all sorts of rhymes. I like the automatic stuff I do. Thanks for the feedback. It's appreciated. __________________ I'm so in love with a girl... she is my everything

08-10-2004, 08:55 PM	#6 (permalink)
fallenangel soaring Location: near the water	way too familiar, it's a bit eery. Great writing Spike __________________ all I wanna do is - give the best of me to you

08-10-2004, 08:57 PM	#7 (permalink)
Blonddie Crazy Location: Southern California	That's really good. Excellent metaphors..... __________________ "There's one in every family...two in mine actually.."--- Zazu

08-11-2004, 01:34 AM	#8 (permalink)
SpikeQX99 The Best thing that never happened to you Location: Silverdale, WA	too familiar? that's strange, seems like this really hit it on the head for a lot of people. It's kinda creepy to me, because I'm not normally writing like that. I just can't sit and say, "I'm gonna write poetry". I end up with all kinds of goofy rhymes and all that. Sounds more like a rap song that what I actually feel. I'm glad that people connect with this for whatever reason. __________________ I'm so in love with a girl... she is my everything