Cell Phone Annoyances
 

Originally posted it in my journal. Decided to make a post out of it.

Here's the place to vent about inappropriate cell phone use, what you've done about it, how you've responded to it, and what you believe we should do about it.

Today I was frustrated by a person chatting on their cell phone next to me in the library. I turned to her when she hung up and said, "Excuse me, do you have any idea how rude you were?"
She looked at me, shocked, "uhh, no."
"This is a library. You don't turn a cell phone on in a library, much less answer it and carry on a conversation about how you're in the library."
She stared. Finally, "You're kidding, right?"
I packed up my stuff. Stood up. Picked up her cell phone. Made a move to chuck it vehemently to the floor. Then threw it in her lab when she said, "HEY!"

Normally, I don't react this way. I'm usually just minorly frustrated. Less so if it sounds like one of those urgent conversations, for which cell phones were invented: loved one is dying in the hospital and you're waiting for news, or you have a sister who is giving birth sometime this week and you want to be there for it.

I blame my behavior on PMS.
What really shocked me, though, was that this fluently English-speaking, well-educated Californian had no idea that it wasn't appropriate to talk above a whisper in a library, much less chat on a cell phone.

Ha kudos on the scolding... such insolence along those lines also drives me nuts.

In the meantime you might want to consider investing in something like the following: http://www.signonsandiego.com/uniont...n4jammers.html

...just don't get caught haha

How much noise did you make in the library by scolding her?

Good job. By disturbing everybody... maybe they'll think twice about being "that guy" in a place where it is no excuse.

Kids and their cell phones. Is that conversation THAT important?

"ZOMG, MY BFF BRITNEY!"

Blame your outrage on her being a stupid fucking git, not PMS.

GG, I've noticed this on my campus too. There are people who answer their phones in the middle of lecture. Shit, there's a guy in my math lecture who has a little Bluetooth headset so he can talk all through class. Fucking annoying.

What happened to common courtesy?

What about when people take their cell phones into the bathroom...

I always try to make as much bodily function noise as possible when they do that...

Ha ha ha good point, but I think he was just standing up for his fellow library patrons.


I hate cellphones. My ringer is on silent all the time. I look to see who called me and then return the call. I hate to hear that thing ring, because it only does when I'm in the shower...or eating...or sleeping...or....

One time I was teaching my swim class, kids aged around 8-9 years old. One of the little girls mothers kept coming over to the edge of the pool with a towel and her cell phone in hand. She allowed her daughter to dry her hands and then respond to a text message. She did this about twice before I told her to please wait until the end of the lesson. Un-freaking-believable.

I've noticed that on campus too at Tech. During my Poli-Sci class one guy answered his phone twice during lecture and kept talking before he walked out to finish his call. After class I called him out on it, (he was in my group for our final project) and said it was very rude. He responded that it was just his ringer so he could leave class. Whatever, if you don't want to respect your teacher stay home or out of the library.

Pedestrians and drivers. Ugh! I've encountered people jaywalking in the middle of a busy road, holding their hand up while crossing the middle of a street with a 45 - 50 mph speed limit, phone glued to their ear.

I've had drivers cut me off and suddenly slow down. After waiting for them to regain speed, when I pass them I can see they're on the phone. :rolleyes:

I don't think you were bitchy at all, GG. Some people think when their cell phone rings, the world needs to revolve around them.

A phone this big practically makes it revolve around you.
http://www.ecojoes.com/wp-content/up..._cellphone.jpg

Way to go, I think that if more people told kids about proper manners maybe it will slowly sink in.

whisper.

I dunno, I think you were kinda a bitch. I guess I don't really have a problem with people talking on their cell phones, because I've grown up with it.

It's going to happen more and more, so I'm glad I'm used to it already.

They're an adult, and I don't think it's anyone's place to scold someone else unless they're truly in a position of power over them. I might've been more polite in my response (eg 'sorry'), but I wouldn't have been pleased with your attitude.

"Do you know how rude you were being" is not a statement designed to elicit a positive response.

Yeah, it's just the PMS.

Next time wear ear plugs while in the library.

wtf? A library is a place people go to study/research in quiet, its not social time there, we do not go there to hear other people's telephone conversations.

seriously some of you think a library is an appropriate place to be disturbing other people? damn

GG--you go girl

Oooh, and that means they can read the big sign on the way into the library that says "NO CELL PHONES, PLEASE BE QUIET."

Pfft... rules are rules... and they're no good if enforcement isn't instantaneous.

If you're not in your car or doing something that involves the use of both of your hands...


TAKE THE FUCKING PLASTIC BABY PENIS OUT OF YOUR EAR!!!

There is a really annoying trend of people playing music on their cellphones through the built-in loudspeakers in public places - specifically public transport. I don't want to hear your stupid manufactured-pop crap when I'm standing up in a sweaty bus stuck in rush-hour traffic.

Or even more stupid - when someone decides to go listen to their entire ringtone collection at full volume. On public transport.

The worst thing is that people don't say anything here, because there is a genuine risk that the perpetrator might turn around and knife you. I have certainly given thought to knifing these people. GRRR.

I was in court the other day and these assholes were walking through the halls blasting some shitting rap music... In a court house... Needless to say they got kicked out. But not without a fight.

Rude people suck. They're also pretty ubiquitous. The way I figure it, you can do the whole visceral thing and 'teach them a lesson,' or you can just get on with your day. It only bothers you if you let it.

I mean, you do realize that after you walked out of the library that girl probably called her friends right away to tell them about the rude person who almost broke her phone, don't you? Aside from making you feel better, your actions aren't likely to have changed anything at all.

So when you get on a public bus, being knifed by a stranger for almost no reason is a serious concern for you? Dude. I don't know where you live, but I'm glad I'm not there.

I think if I witnessed this scene in real time I would have had to stifle an erection. The only thing that could have made it better is if you took her SIM card out and ground it to dust right in front of her.

I've given up on people and technology. Seeing someone try to stand up to the horde warms my heart though.

I had a friend who would teach guitar lessons. One of his students interrupted his lesson by taking a call. When his 60 minutes were up(by the clock) my friend made his move to wrap up the session. The student then reminded him that he was leaving him 20 minutes short of class time. My friend stood up and said, you took that 20 minutes on the phone buddy. My time is my time, regardless of how you choose to spend it the clock still ticks. The nerve of some people.

Cellphones have no place in a library. I'd be pissed off if I was trying to study and some nitwit was yakking away about something that wasn't an emergency.

Like Shani said gg...you go girl.

Yeah gg ;)

The one other place I can't stand it is at the movie.

That girl took 3 calls during, and in one she was telling what is happening.

People around were giving comment, but for that teen, it was us who was wrong.

Good thing they show the montage to tell you to turn off your cell before the movie itself!!!!

We have "No Cellphone Use" signs all over the place at work. They can interfere with the heart monitors. It doesn't matter how you tell people or how many times, they always get pissed off when you tell them to take it outside.

I live in London. There have been numerous stories of people getting violent when confronted with their rude behaviour (talking on cellphone, dropping litter, throwing chips at people). If everyone got hard-line on rude behaviour, we'd probably be all right but people are afraid.

I must have a high rude-tolerance gauge or something. I can't see being pissed at any of the the things described above (besides the being stabbed thing).

Why do you all get so hot-and-bothered by someone on a cell phone or someone playing music? It's their world too.

I'm about the quietest person you'll find in public, and I don't answer my phone when it'd be rude to do so, but I don't give a flying fuck if someone else does.

After the first time I would've gone to get the usher. Around here that'll get you kicked out of the theater lickety-split.

OK, so I missed that one. I'd be pissed at having a conversation during a movie.

Not a library or a public bus, though.

I dont get that....its not ok at a movie but its ok at a library? why?

On topic?

Because I've never bought into the "library is a quiet sanctuary" crap that most people believe. I don't need dead silence to read a fucking book. I think I expect that if I'm AROUND other people, there will be noise. If you want absolute silence, check the damn book out and go home.

Granted I still wouldn't answer my phone in a library because I don't like upsetting the Noise Nazis who believe it should be more silent than Jesus on day 2 in a library, but I'm not personally upset by others that do.

What's so special about books that make them any different from a store, a restaraunt, etc., somehow demanding special rules about noise?

Focus? You may be one of those that can read and study in the bleachers at the Grand Prix, but some of us need solitude.

That's why libraries instituted that "rule" many moons ago. Consideration, nothing more.

maybe the signs that state to keep quiet? Its not like its a book store....I go to mine to do research and I really dont want to hear 20 different conversations about crap I dont care about while Im doing that

Thankfully my library post signs specifically stating no cell phone use and I have seen them come and ask people who choose to ignore it to please take their conversation outside the building

First of all, the TFP wouldn't be what it is if the MEMBERS didn't stand up for its rules. So, to JinnKai, it's absolutely imperative that people enforce the rules of an establishment even if they are not in a position of authority. Secondly, touching someone else's property is totally uncalled for. Totally.

Londoners spend an inordinate amount of time on public transport. I've spent over two hours a working day on public transport for most of the year I've been in London. At the end of a long working day, I really don't want to hear some inconsiderate loudmouth blabbering into a phone.

Firstly, most libraries have limits on how many books you can check out, and secondly many libraries have some books which can't be checked out. A library is not just a place to check out books, it's a resource to be used there and then... if you're doing research from several books for a short period of time, it makes more sense to do so at the library. That's what it's FOR. If someone wants to talk on the phone, there's no reason they can't leave the library and do so.

As jewels443 said, focus. I don't know about you, but when I read, I'm usually thinking (and often studying). It's hard to concentrate continuously for any length of time when there are distractions around when you. Ok, perhaps not you, but it's hard for ME... and I'm guessing most other people out there.

Yes, but in a city of almost 8 million people with sensationalist and ubiquitous trashy media, of course there are. It doesn't mean it's common or at all likely.

+1. I've heard people bitch about people saying hi to a friend, asking the librarian a question or asking someone to call them back later in a library and I really don't get this noise-fascism. If you really can't work with people rustling pages or coughing, just put on your headphones and block it out with music. You could even use earplugs.

Sure, people shouldn't be playing football, running around, having massive conversations or yelling in a library, but there's nothing wrong with a bit of noise above the silence.

However, talking in a movie is unforgivable for obvious reasons.

Yes, I could have rephrased it with, "are you aware that cell phone use is not permitted in libraries." Unfortunately, I was acting on impulse, and the words did not come.

I'm curious, how exactly would you have drilled in the point?

This is a good point. On the other hand, I'm all for efficiency. If it's something that matters, take effective action. To use our very own forum as an example, I might take action against a spammer by using that handy 'report post' button in the lower left corner. This is effective action, as it solves the problem and deals with the offender. Replying with a rant against spammers, on the other hand, may make me feel better but accomplishes nothing.

In the grand scheme of things, some fool on a cell phone isn't really that big of a deal to me in most situations. It's one of those things that I'd probably just ignore on the premise that this person isn't worth taking the time and effort to deal with the problem properly. However, I can see by this thread that I am apparently in the minority with that sentiment. I can understand feeling the need to do something about it, but what does snapping at the person accomplish, other than making one feel better? How does it solve the problem? I feel confident in asserting that the girl in the OP will not change her ways based on the encounter. After all, ignorance arises from an inability to appreciate any perspective apart from one's own, and nothing relayed seems to have created an effective deterrent from her perspective.

I suppose the question, then, is what would constitute effective action in this situation. My first response would be to report the situation to the staff and allow them to exercise their authority in dealing with it (akin to the real-world 'report post' button). If the staff were already aware of it and not taking action, then I don't really know what the next step would be.

Yes, yes... Halx = designated genius.

These situations are only minor annoyances and yet very important.

Do we police ourselves or designate someone as "The Man" to police us?

...

I prefer blunt force trauma.

I don't generally do the Halx worship. Although admitting that might get me banned, or something. Or maybe mobbed by angry users?

I really tend to think of it as a minor annoyance myself, which is why I said I probably wouldn't bother. It's not worth my time. But if one feels the need to take action, what is the action that will result in maximum impact?

Blunt force trauma is your answer to everything. The part that surprises me is how often it works.

and to me carrying on a phone conversation in a library is unforgivable for obvious reasons

Wanna fight?

I wouldn't have drilled in the point. I completely agree with letting the person know that they were being rude by raising the noise level in a quiet zone, but I don't agree with going any further. As Martian points out, there is a limit to an individual's authority regarding house rules. Touching someone else's property (not to mention using it in a threatening manner) without their permission is not within that limit.

Well it's not something you see everyday, but people do get the shit beaten out of them for no reason here. Verbal abuse is pretty commonplace, and I can think of two people I know personally who have had teenagers come up to them and smash their nose in, and walk off. I used to teach at an inner city school in south London and took the bus home. I'd say that I saw an altercation of some kind on the bus every couple of weeks. Granted, not the most upmarket area.

Yes, but it's a right-media perpetuated myth that standing up for yourself or even leaving the house puts you at high risk of being physically injured. Crime is going down, not exploding like you hear everywhere.

I've explained myself. Care to say why libraries need to be completely silent at all times to the point of making them worse and fulfilling their purpose?

Where did I say completely silent? I said I dont want to listen to numerous phone conversations while I am trying to concentrate on research....same as others dont want to listen to conversations while they are concentrating on a movie

Its just plain rude....if you feel the need to talk on the phone take it outside

When did I say it is acceptable to have phone conversations in a library?

I guess the same place I said a library had to be completely silent

I am hereby meeting my responsibility as a member and attempting to uphold forum guidelines by derailing an altercation. Opinions are not things that we hold for the sole purpose of offending each other and it is entirely possible for two people to disagree about something and still get along.

Now ladies, I suggest you hug.

Hey now, I already apologized so there!!!

(and for the record I said quiet....not silent :P )

Ah. This is an interesting point.

Halx, I think you are technically correct. On the other hand, we are all human. And sometimes a little bit of over-reaction, although illegitimate as you say, does seem to get the job done.

I work in a library and am a student -- I'm very happy to hear you responded like this.

Still...
"What really shocked me, though, was that this fluently English-speaking, well-educated Californian had no idea that it wasn't appropriate to talk above a whisper in a library, much less chat on a cell phone."

what is this trash about?
Would an immigrant speaking broken English not have been expected to know better than to be rude in a library?
Libraries are not exclusive to the U.S., and I assure you common courtesy is not either.

Color me rude then.

I have important calls that are sometimes time sensitive.

I don't buy in to "unwritten rules"

I will assume nothing about needing to be quiet in a library if there are no signs that indicate that as a policy. I've been on buses with 50 people that weren't talking and that shit annoys me, I hate living in such an anti-social society that everyone has to avert their eyes 5 degrees and slightly downward and take care not to sit too close to another person due to being in such a PC society now.

Now, if she was just babbling and interrupting your concentration, it would have been much simpler to take the direct approach and ask her to get off the phone while she was still on it instead of making a public spectacle of it. It would at least given her the option to go out front to finish the call.

and to WK

did you seriously say to use the cell phone in the car?
thats illegal in some states (like WA for example)



anyways, if there isn't a posted rule or request to not use the cell phone (like there are at any movie theater) then goddamnit, I'm going to use the service I'M PAYING FOR every month if I get a call.

meh.

in the same breath though, I do take care to be polite to people in the area if they look like they can't be disturbed.

There are some places not to use a cell phone. The library is one of them.

This is an unwritten rule along the same lines as "Don't wake up on fire" or "stop throwing rocks at that hungry lion" is an unwritten rule.

Had I been in genuinegirly's shoes, I would have probably said, "You're either an asshole or an idiot, because those are the only two groups of people that would use their cell phone in a fucking library."

well admittedly i'm a bit of an asshole at times but is there a reason that a library must be quiet? I find it eerie. Maybe it's my tenacity to be stuck in a creative music mood 24/7 but silence is like walking death to me.

A reason for a library to be quiet: People are fuckin' reading and studying, duh.

http://www.nctimes.com/articles/2005...1505194124.txt

That's why god gave us the iPod. I always have mine with me.

so, is it impossible for someone to hold a quiet conversation on the phone?

I dunno about you but I often don't need to talk any louder than I need to talk to the librarian when the mic is half an inch from my mouth.

I don't deny that it should be quiet, I only question the reason why. Again, I have no problem with my ability to tune out and focus on what i'm reading or studying. Hell I can listen to music and watch tv at the same time, read a book and music at the same time, I guess I don't "get it" with this "omg sensory overload" barrier of sanctity that people append to the library. I just don't think cell phones are the culprit here, loudmouths on the other hand...

Maybe it's just "my generation" or something, but I've come to the conclusion that if I desire "alone time" or "quiet time" that the safest place is the bathroom. Second place, Bedroom.

I've never expected a PUBLIC place where you introduce the chaos factor of a multicultural merging and different backgrounds to ever be a quiet place. I always viewed it as a facility to get in, get your shit, check it out, and take it to a quiet place. I have never been to a quiet library, it's a place where information resides, and humans exchange information via speech as well as writing.

Don't take me too seriously though, I'm not one of those people who spend a lot of time at a library, I dont impose my beliefs on others in public facilities and I wouldn't hang out somewhere where others would do that to me anyway.

Shauk, some people don't have the luxury of their own private bathroom, or quiet bedroom. People go to the library because it is one of the few places where quiet is upheld as a code of conduct. I come from a big family. I went to a big university. I've always had loud roommates. The library really was a sanctuary.

On the rare occasion that I am in a library, it is to study and do research, NOT just to read a book, I can do that at home. I can not fully concentrate when someone is talking nearby. Whispering...fine. Shuffling papers, fine. Talking on a cell phone? Not fine.

Talk all you want in the store...on the bus...in a restaurant. I might find it rude or uncouth, but I'm not going to get that upset about it. In a library...it's discourteous and uncalled for.

Psst... I'm 24.

Yeah, I'm of the same generation, too.

I've spent way too much time in libraries. Even with a large well lit desk and a comfortable chair in my 'den' at home, I've found a quiet carrel in a library is the most effective place to learn and study. I'm fortunate enough to have attended a large enough university that there were half a dozen decent libraries with clearly posted 'quiet' and 'silent' floors. I haven't been to a Public library for years, but I don't think I've ever been to a library that didn't have some sort of signage requiring quiet.

As much as I've tried to have my headphones on, sometimes I just couldn't focus with any distraction (Calc IV and Differential Equations II come to mind, years later. Reviewing a bid document last month too). If I can hear you with my ear plugs in, then we have a problem. I've shhhed. I've asked nicely. I've said 'hey, this is a library- shut the fuck up'.

Mileage varied, but I have very low tolerance of cell phone users. Put it on vibrate, then leave it sitting on a hard surface? You're a moron. You think you can chat in the library? You're a moron. Because it is a 'public space'? Yeah, you know.

That makes three.

I find cellphones in general to be an annoyance.

Small electronic leashes.

I find it amazing that so many people have so much important stuff to talk about that they can't wait till they get home.

blah blah blah blah

STFU already

your conversations aren't that interesting

right cuz I wanna wait till I go home to find out that someone was trying to invite me to a social engagement while I was still in downtown seattle, or I wanna wait until I'm in Renton after work to check the message from my future landlord saying he needs an additional 40$ for a credit check so he can give me the keys to my house so I can start moving over the weekend, saving me an extra 20 mile trip, or...

I dunno, people don't call me for stupid "omg I got my nails done today" bullshit anyways.

then, based on what i overhear all the time, you are an exception.

so lets see...are churches, funerals, and school classes ok for those of you that dont seem to care about respecting "quiet" places"

I have to say my mind here...this thread is totally pissing me off, thank god I have taught my 14 year old to have more respect for other people than some people here. Just because there are places where the "public" gather, it doesnt make them appropriate places for cell phone use.

QFT.

And when it comes to the "generational" thing, I'm 22. I had the worst roommates in the history of the world my freshman year at OSU, and thankfully there were libraries and quiet study rooms where I could go to regain my sanity and get stuff done.

Shauk, have you ever actually used a library for its intended purpose? Not just picking up books and leaving? I think you might be more inclined to understand the argument against cell phones if you've had to sit through 10 conversations about absolutely nothing/who got laid by whom on Friday night/how drunk so-and-so was at that party, etc. Sure, the occasional "yes, that meeting time is fine, see you then" is important, but you are still disturbing library patrons in a quiet area by answering it. The best solution? Grab a seat near a "loud" area (elevator, front desk, etc.) and stand up and move away from the quiet area to answer your phone. It's common courtesy, and it should be seen more often!

Yes, it is impossible. When two people are having a conversation, it is a constant level of sound, and it is easier for a third party to tune it out. A phone conversation, on the other hand, has only one side, with pauses. The start / stop / start nature of one side of the conversation is significantly more intrusive to the third party.

Churches:
Funerals: I've seen cell phones used at funerals before, the U.S. is a large place, and the workforce isn't always going to allow for time off. Sometimes people need to call the person that missed the funeral to grieve with them remotely. This is kind of an exception, but I mean would you flip out at the widow who's on the phone crying to her daughter who's 2000 miles away?
Aside from the "ceremony" itself, funerals aren't always quiet, it's people talking in many small pockets about the person who died, and usually only briefly before it goes off on a tangent of some sort. The only "silence" is the ceremony of giving a moment of silence.

it's amazing what people don't hear if you think this is "silence"

School Classes: Theres no unwritten rule, it's generally quite fucking clear as to what is acceptable and not in classrooms.

wow what a passive aggressive post.

don't mention me by name or anything but still go on to be like "my 14 year old is better than you"

and people say i'm rude? for challenging people to provide a reason for silence?

Hell, for the sake of argument, lets take a look at a wikipedia entry for Library

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Library


not once is there anything mentioned about being a place for people to quietly do anything. It goes on to state, the sole purpose of the library is to be a collection of information, it also goes on to state that "Library patrons may not know how to use a library effectively. This can be due to lack of early exposure, shyness, or anxiety and fear of displaying ignorance. In United States public libraries, beginning in the 19th century these problems drove the emergence of the library instruction movement, which advocated library user education"


I may be pissing people off in this thread but I think the way people are so "Matter of factly " posting stuff about libraries being quiet and saying that their sole purpose is to do stuff like homework, or write some paper about something that some teacher assigned to xyz student for no other reason than to have something to assign a grade to, without any information aside from their personal upbringing and opinion pieces to back it up is a bit bold.

I'm borderline insulted in return that instead of a debate, i'm met with a passive aggressive insult to my experience in life and my "respect" for others is put in to question.


If you must know, i've never even used my phone in a library, so keep that in mind before people start jumping my shit about this topic.

and that's exactly what I'd expect I'd do.

Personally, I think phone etiquette is out the window these days. It's a damned shame. I get offended when someone's phone goes off at dinner, or when someone has "call waiting" and a second phone call interrupts our conversation (Sorry, the other line is ringing, BRB!). Ugh.

I went to brunch with one of my friends this morning (and two of her friends I'm not very close to). She spent at least five minutes on the phone while the three of us are sitting there waiting for her to answer a question asked before her phone rang. Rude? Yes.

Lets see...I dont think I said anything about the visitation, I said the funeral....which means the actual service at the funeral home, church or grave side.

How was what I said p/a? I think I VERY plainly stated that I have taught my child to respect others and I'm not going to apologize that you dont see to feel others are due the same respect, I teach her to make sure that her behavior goes with the posted rules of a location.

And just because the libraries you've been in dont have signs doesnt mean all of them dont, in fact I've never been in one that DIDNT and that goes for public libraries as well as university libraries and specific research libraries

I rest my case:rolleyes:

Martian, you're my hero.

I tend to give a little slack to someone who doesn't seem to come from the same general educational background as me. Not meant in offense, just saying they had been through the same education I had, and yet didn't understand a very basic rule. I probably wouldn't have said anything to someone who was carrying on a phone conversation in Swahili, for fear of running into a language berrrior.

Both the university library here and the public library here have large signs saying no cellphones here. Once you step through the foyer and into the library, quiet is expected. Now, in my library, I know that the 3rd floor overlooking the entrance to the library tends to be the noisiest place because that's where people in groups get together to study. But if they're going to be holding conversations, most people get a study room, and take the conversation behind closed doors. There are also 2 quiet floors (out of 6 total) where no conversation is allowed, period. If you are caught being noisy, or talking on a cellphone, you will be asked to leave--regardless of where you are in the library. Even in the computer commons, there are several signs reminding people that the library is a study environment, and as such should be kept quiet. They deliberately opened a "collaborative learning center" within the library for people doing group work so that their noise would be kept minimal in the rest of the library.

Every university library I've been in has had a similar policy.

As for where you'll find me in mine...5th floor (quiet floor), at the back, in a study carrel with "PINK TACO" scrawled across it in Sharpie. No, I didn't do it, but it still tells me which carrel is mine.

Learn how to text?

You'd be surprised how often I get that.

that's fine by me, but don't quote me like it's not something that I know about.

1. People don't know where I am when they call me, I don't have a GPS probe stuck in my ass, nor hand out ASSociated tracking devices. (I'm so fucking clever, or good at pointing out obvious puns, i'll vote myself the captain obvious award now kthx)
2. Texting is often an additional fee with many service providers, sending or recieving.
3. Not everyone who calls me is on a cell phone.
4. not every cell phone has text capability (yeah hard to believe but people still use dialup too)
5. I don't need to "learn" how to text, I'm well aware of how to do it, and it's not nearly as efficient as verbal communication.

That said, I get PLENTY of texts, I usually have to delete my inbox at least once every other day. People don't call me unless..

it's important
it's urgent
they're unfamiliar with texting or don't even know that it's a cell phone they are calling (like said future landlord) (now CURRENT landlord, btw)
It's too complicated of a subject to type about with a 160 character limit.
Would require enough Q&A that it would drag a 30s phone call out in to a 10 minute data exchange.


anyways, imagine all the posts in this thread as exchanges between 2 people on a cell phone, and that everyone types about 3-5 wpm, and that every 160 char, theres a 10 second pause as the message is sent, and a new text dialogue is selected, and then the recipient is defined. I'd rather call them and read it off really quick and be done with it

man every thing u did was cool but then you totally ruined it all by grabbing her cell and now your whole message means nothing u had no right to grab her cell

Then go someplace where you aren't infringing on the rights of others who have no other quiet place to go.

A public library isn't an appropriate homebase for a business. There are no signs to proclaim it, it's just common sense and decency.

I guess someone needs to write out a "rules of cell phone use" for those who put their needs before all others and show no respect for others. :rolleyes:

and thats why the libraries who have this kind of rule DO put up signs.

I'm talking about the ones that dont.

and really isn't this an argument over which person should be inconvenienced? The person who is oversensitive and cannot focus with the slightest normal level of distraction vs the self righteous motormouth with a cell phone?

I don't see the need to accommodate the mentally weak willed in the absense of rules that protect them. If there are signs, or even an "ambiance" that conveys silence, I honor it, however, NOT EVERY LIBRARY has the same vibe to it.

In the OP, if there was a sign posted, then yeah, the woman with the cell phone was a bippy twat and deserved the scolding.
If not, then the OP made somewhat of an over assertion against the "offender"

it's all circumstance

I always thought it was an unspoken rule, like the way most toilets don't have signs that say "Please urinate in the urinal or the toilet bowl", or the way pavements don't always have signs saying "don't drop your litter here".

I guess you think that people exercising at a gym who insist a smoke-free environment to be oversensitive too, or that the people who insist that their restaurant not smell like shit are oversensitive and can't eat without the slightest distraction?

Gyms are smoke-free so people can exercise healthily and in comfort (as it was designed to be used). Restaurants don't smell like shit so people can enjoy their food. And libraries are quiet so people can study in peace.

Mentally weak willed? Dude, seriously... are you trolling or something?

If the OP got annoyed enough with the offender, it's likely that everyone else in the library was being quiet. So it is likely to be one of those libraries where quiet is implicitly expected.

What an amazing discussion. By amazing, I mean, I am amazed by the idea that people here do not agree on the general premise that a library is intended to be, in general a quiet place. I have no idea if the Library near me has a posted policy or not, but it drives me crazy when people cannot be bothered to place their phone on silent, much less, carry out an extended conversation about nothing. How can people not recognize that their actions can effect the experience of others, and therefore behave in a way appropriate for the situation.

Silence your phone.
Keep it short, or move to an appropriate area.

Why is this hard, or an inconvenience?




Culture is dead?

I hate those mosquito ringtones. As well as the rude people talking on them in inappropriate places.

"Please urinate in the urinal or the toilet bowl"

"don't drop your litter here"

comparing written laws to public etiquette is a good way to have your argument tossed out the door. Personally, I don't care either way as to what people do in libraries. I use the internet to research what I need to research.

Insist, insist, insist and with a fucking documented reason, my cell phone isn't killing you.



care to back this up? there are documented reasons for the rulings against smoking in public places, where is your documented reason for silence in public places?

You tell me who's trolling after your sorry attempts to compare written law to unwritten ceremony. Way to focus on that line when just prior I said the oh so flattering "the self righteous motormouth with a cell phone"

I don't invest a care into the outcome of this argument either way, my opinions will change no minds, turn no heads, and really, this thread would have been dead 2 pages ago had there been no devil's advocate such as myself to go and challenge the "norm" of acceptable behavior.


Her outburst was far more disruptive than a phone conversation, throwing shit that belongs to other people?

I mean seriously, 90% of the people in this thread are justifying this outburst because this girl was being "rude"

There are far more civil ways to get your point across.

No offense to the OP, I just don't see why you couldn't notify a library employee if it was bothering you that much and if there were signs in place.

again, libraries by definition are no more than a repository of books in a public building. Rules vary depending on management.

It's an unwritten rule to tip, but people don't always tip. Same category in my mind. It's an optional etiquette ceremony.

"Each of us puts his person and all his power in common under the supreme direction of the general will; and in a body we receive each member as an indivisible part of the whole."

-Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Oeuvres complètes

First of all Shauk, I apologise if I came across as making it personal. When I asked if you were trolling, it was out of incredulity rather than to provoke you. This discussion is interesting to me because it sheds a lot of light on what I see as increasingly common behaviour.

I concede that there are no laws regarding being quiet in a library - but I'm sure at some point there were no laws regarding smoking, shitting in public etc (possibly in part because the effects of smoking were not yet known). There are still no laws about farting in an enclosed space, but it's not cool to do so in a small restaurant for example! Surely even back then, the code of etiquette would have meant that people understood that it was still not socially acceptable behaviour?

Seems a little crazy that we should have to have laws for everything - I would have hoped that people are considerate enough to not need them.

I know talking in a library doesn't kill others, but it is likely to disrupt their focus. I'm really not sure why this isn't an acceptable reason... should something have to kill you before it is regarded as inappropriate?

Library etiquette:

http://media.www.studlife.com/media/...-1881920.shtml
http://www.csudh.edu/dearhabermas/library01.htm
http://www.lawsociety.sk.ca/newlook/.../etiquette.htm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/pda/A934887?s_id=3

And yes, I know, I know, it's etiquette and not law... but it is some effort at documentation.

See above regarding my trolling comment.

For the record, I do think someone speaking on a cell phone in a library is inconsiderate and unreasonable, and that a person who can't focus in a library due to aforementioned motormouth normal. Maybe that makes me weak-willed and unable to concentrate due to silence, but that might be why I go to a library! :)

Agreed.

Do I understand why she did it? Yes. Was it a little heavy-handed? Sure. Perhaps there was a more tactful way to handle it, but I appreciate why she reacted that way. I don't think road rage is appropriate either, but I can understand why it happens when people drive inconsiderately (and yes, I know, law vs etiquette).

I think it's reasonable to assume that if there are tables with chairs there, it is more than simply a repository of books. I won't rehash comments about library etiquette.

This is true - but we established in the other thread that people who don't tip are either ignorant of the realities of tipping, or aware but either cheap or disagree on how to handle tipping.

Also I think the issue of tipping your waiter is closer to an issue of how you treat the librarian - at the end of the day whether you tip your waiter or not doesn't affect other diners so much. For humourous value as much as anything else, I'll draw the parallel with farting in the restaurant. It might be fun for the farter, but it's not fair on the other people who would prefer to be able to enjoy their meal without it. Doesn't make them over-sensitive.

I suppose we simply disagree on whether libraries should be quiet or not.

or would could agree that farting is AWESOME! end of thread!













I see your point though, it's good. You're right, and I do agree that it's good manners and positive etiquette to be quiet for the sole purpose of trying to respect the concentration of those around you. I just was saying that being my opinion, there are times when I could be honest here, in public, on tfp, and say, "yeah, there are phone calls I would take even under those circumstances" because it's simply a matter of me breaking etiquette to some people who, ultimately, at the end of MY day, don't matter to me. I don't know them. There are some scenario's in which my personal progress in life superceed that of the studious and silent. BUT hey, my situation is unique, I was stuck in a bad situation and answering my phone was like grabbing on to the lifeboat. Yeah, some other people might suffer getting a lil water splashed on them as I get into the boat 1st, but it's minor, they'll get to where they are going by the end of the day.

Rude? possibly, honest? brutally!

Well farting is awesome, but I digest. I mean, digress. ;) As far as I'm concerned, what you fart when no one else is around is your business (literally).

I appreciate your good-natured response. In the spirit of full disclosure, I keep my phone on (silent) when I'm in the library, and use text messaging. There have been times when I've had to take an important call, and at those times I leave the library to take or return the call, then come back when I'm done. Everybody's happy.

I see where you're coming from gg, I would have probably snapped at her if I was at my breaking point. But I would never blame PMS for it. You are in control of your feelings. I hate it when girls blame their actions and whatnot on PMS. Every woman with a working menstrual cycle bleeds and cramps and bloats each month, its a fact of life, get over it. Besides, by the time you turn 50, they'll be complaining about NOT having their period, and bitch about hot flashes and whatnot. *shakes head* It never ends. I see both ends of the spectrum every damn day, and it makes me humble...seriously.

Most people find that the reduction in one of the senses can improve the senses of another. For me, I'm practically legally blind, so my body made up for it by making me very hearing sensitive.

This is why I avoid studying/working in libraries. Even with headphones on, every noise around me distracts me, and I just waste my time. At my university, the main floor of every library on campus is a zoo....everyone's moving around so much, and talking loudly.

I only would go in there if I was in a cubicle, blasting music as I worked. Now, I don't even bother. The college I'm currently at must be filled with polite people. Because when anyone has a cell phone or pager go off in the middle of class, or in a test, they immediately turn it off, beet red in the face. hehe. I've never seen someone answer a phone in class. I guess I'm lucky.

I leave my cell phone always for emergencies. I'm kind of the backbone of the family, so i get called on for errands, pick ups, emergencies, etc. But I have voicemail, so if I get called in class, I set it immediately to voicemail, and if the call is important, they'll leave a message. if I get a message, I step out and see what the problem is. *shrugs*

Luckily, my cell ringer is quiet, barely noticeable. Just 4 repeated soft dings, like a major arpeggio /music geek
lol :P

This really isn't off topic, seeing it is about cell phones, but not the library. I was in line at the bank the other day, and all of a sudden, the most ferocious sound of dogs was right behind me, I jumped out of my skin. It was the persons ring tone on their cell. Actually everyone jumped, it was so realistic sounding. No music, just the very loud sound of junk yard dogs at their angeriest. One woman had a little two year old by the hand, who immediately started screaming, and looking all around for the "mean doggies." For a few seconds it was a bit of chaos. The person who's cell phone it was, just answered it, like it was no big thing, oblivious to the rest of us.

Totally on topic - since my hope with this thread was to relate stories of cell phone annoyances and to try and find more healthy ways of communicating our frustrations over common cell phone-induced breeches of ettiquite. (since my gut-reaction to cell phone use in a library was admittedly terribly unhealthy)

That sounds terrifying. Who wouldn't notice that kind of a crowd response? Maybe he's just used to that response, or gets a kick out of it?

Somebody answered their phone while using the urinal next to me but he didnt miss a beat as he answered "What up dude, you kinda caught me with my dick in my hand"

I used to work at a little independent meat market as a meat cutter. It was a service case and you had to wait on customers. Towards the end of the day, there was always a lot of clean up in the back, but we had a bell, and I could see the counter from the back. It totally amazed me at the number of people who would ring the bell, and as soon as I got out there, here they are on their cell phone. I would just turn and walk away from them, and the response was..."hey, hey, wait a minute, I want something" , So, I would turn around and go back to them, same thing, they would start talking on the cell. Walk away from them again, and they get IRATE..
I thought they would get the hint, but it seemed like I always had to explain, that I was not going to stand in front of them, until they decided to tell me what they wanted ,AFTER they got off the phone. I told them the nano second they knew what they wanted, I would be there, but I did not care to listen about the great party they went to last night, or like the other person said who's doing who....blah blah
I guess cell phones are here to stay, but me personally could live without them. i don't even like my land phone. How someone can talk on the phone for hours, and its not limited to women,has always intrigued me. Even as a teenager, never did it. A phone is a necessary evil, but you call the person for a reason , state the reason, case closed...??but, that is only my 2 cents.

Interesting discussion about cell phones and library etiquette. However, some of you have touched on a topic I'm still confused about.

Rather than whine and whine and whine about people's quiet and brief conversations (somehow the librarians are exempted), if the tiniest amount of noise bothers you that much, why not put on some headphones or in some earplugs?!

A lot of service counters and coffeeshops around here have put up signs saying they will not wait on people who are talking on cell phones. I think it's great, but it kind of saddens me that such a sign should be necessary.