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Originally Posted by serlindsipity
Baby steps Ben, Baby steps.
G'luck. We'll all be here too.
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Well, i think i know what you mean serlin, but often in the end of the relationship, you just need to say "fuck it" and plunge into the cold water, instead of inching in bit by bit. Yes, you still get the cold water, but beats the hell out of torturing yourself through baby stepping it.
Announcing that you are willing and able to go the divorce route will likely shock the hell out of her. What she does at that point will either A) realize she cant be without you, and fight to keep you or B) realize divorce is the right thing.
what worked for a few friends was to announce that "this isnt working anymore, maybe a divorce is in order" and then to spend time away, so that both could think, meanwhile talking with friends, soul searching, etc. If you go this route, then have it as a goal to only return when you have made up your mind how its going to be. And above all, be firm with your conditions. Hold your guns