7w17ch

ok i know im an idiot so please dont reiterate that point and ill try to be as detailed as possible.

So im working this IT job and this beutiful natural redhed (irish red) same height as i am thin build gets a job in our network operations center. now if you havent been outside in a while its friggin impossible to find an attractive intelligent girl who is also into nerd shit like computers and video games.
now im one who believes in not dipping ones pen in the company ink so i just maintan a friendly relationship with said girl. now bout 3 weeks after she starts i get terminated. (a long story) and i think oh ok its over. and proccede to move on with my life. now heres the kicker. she looks up one of my email addys and emails me. we continue our banter for a while and eventually i coerce her to meet me at a coffee house. we meet and its great total chemistry. now her 21st b-day is coming up and i ask her what she is doing and she says working. so i tell her to meet me out at a bar after her shift. suprisingly she does meet me and another birthday boy. we proccede to get wasted. and then we go and run through some woods and make out for hours (hot) . then back to my place for some naked intamacy. (even hotter)
now the relationship has started quite quickly and eventually if ind out that she was seeing an aquantence of mine up untill about a day or two after she and i hook up. (bad) so effectivly i have "taken" this guy's girl (im not trying to objectify im just trying to explain it) now i understand that she has a free will and all but its disconcerting right? some of my friends do what friends do and warn me that she "constantly has a boyfriend". hrm. but whatever.
now its months later and i get a pleasent phonecall at 8 this morning, she obviously sounds upset and tells me i have mail. the nitty gritty of it is she slept with some guy last night (after telling me the roads were too bad to go out) . WTF? im devistated and doing the best i can not to head out to the first bar i find open. i think i am in love with this girl and i dont know how to handle this. i think im willing to take her back but then i would be an idiot right? im just so confuse and im left with allthis time because she has gone to sleep and will call me when she gets up. im too upset to go back to sleep and i think that writing this post may be teh most productive and least dangerous thing i can do. please advise.

oh as a side note i told her i loved her about a month ago and about a week ago she said she loved me too and that it felt good to say that. i keep hearing those words and it just makes me sicker. i just dont know what to do.