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This is not what you want to hear but...I was in a similar situation with a girl once, we were together for 5 years. She had tons of other problems on top of the sexual issues, pill abuse, eating disorder, depression, all of stemming from rape at a young age. I eventually left her because I realized she was never going to get over it and be able to enjoy sex, and that baggage she carried caused all sorts of other problems that would never go away without treating the cause. 5 years, 22 years, it doesn't matter, she didn't want to face it and move on. And I felt like a total bastard but I love sex and not having that part of our relationship was killing me, I decided life is too short to be miserable because you feel obligated to stay with someone who makes it that way.
Well I hope I'm wrong, but I learned that all the therapy and loving support in the world won't do shit unless the person is willing to get better. Good luck.
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