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Everyone else has really great suggestions, so I will just add that it sounds like at this point you will like yourself better out of this marriage, that you will be stronger and not feeling brought down by your husband's barbs. People do change after 25 years...I'd worry if they didn't. But if things aren't changing for the better, you may be better off out of the marriage.
Other than that, I haven't a clue. I've never been in your situation and oddly enough, all my relatives by both blood and marriage have happy marriages. I offer hugs and best wishes for you, whatever you decide.
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Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
I am large. I contain multitudes.
-Walt Whitman, Song of Myself
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