Manorfire

Let me point you to an important discovery I've made. No, I didn’t discover how to force Madonna to retire, but I did make a discovery that I hope will be of interest to some people:-

You can gawp as much as you like at internet porn if you located it by mishap. I’ve had it confirmed by three separate women, each one more fragrant than the former, and they all said something along the lines of… “Nah, that’s ok, if you weren’t trying to find porn. It's hardly your fault”

So, go search Google Images for something innocent like “Cartoon characters” and see what you get on the second or third page. That’s not your fault now, is it? You were looking for humorous pictures of Barney Rubble, not some randy granny dislocating her hip.

Then, when caught viewing, all you have to do is click your browser’s back button and show your SO you were actually searching for something completely innocent. The law states that entrapment is illegal, and therefor, they are legally obligated to forgive you, while demanding Google apologises and compensates you for your emotional distress.

Right, so now I've proven that it's morally ok to look at internet porn, we all want to know who does it and what are your areas of interest?

World's King

Or you could just not hide your addiction to masturbating...

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heavy is the head that wears the crown

Siege

Actually, you haven't proven that it's morally ok to look at internet porn.

if you search for "cartoon characters" with the intent to look at porn, you yourself know that you might as well have been searching for porn. just that it makes explaining it to the SO easier.

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"Your name's Geek? Do you know the origin of the term? A geek is someone who bites the heads off chickens at a circus. I would never let you suck my dick with a name like Geek"

--Kevin Smith

This part just makes my posts easier to find

loquitur

what's wrong with looking at internet porn? It's harmless, passes the time, and it's educational.

Maybe the SO could use some enlightenment about how porn provides education about the range of diversity of the human form, lessons in staying fit, and some lessons in cleanliness and hygiene? Or is it unlikely she'll be convinced?

Halx

Get over it. Seriously.

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yournamehere

"Wow, honey - look at this - and I typed in G-rated midget fisting. Wonder how that happened?

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If you want to avoid 95% of internet spelling errors:
"If your ridiculous pants are too loose, you're definitely going to lose them. Tell your two loser friends over there that they're going to lose theirs, too."
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MSD

If your SO has issues wtih you looking at porn you should be worried more about their insecurity than trying to run from the fact that looking at porn and masturbating, even during a healthy sexual relationship, is perfectly normal and not something that you should have to hide or feel embarassed about.

aabbccbbaa2

I believe there's nothing wrong with internet porn.
It just spieces up your fantasy, and an easy way to wack off when you feel like it...
My gf knows about it, she just doesn't like it to look with me... but she doesn't mind so...

Kaliena

I don't understand this post... I mean, if you're hiding it from your sig other or are having problems about it, wouldn't it just be better to talk about it rather then lie?

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~Beware the waffle~

Lasereth

Ha ha ha wow. You guys are taking this post way too seriously. The guy is simply making a jest at how the Internet is basically a huge porn database now and everyone (including women who don't use computers) knows it.

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"A Darwinian attacks his theory, seeking to find flaws. An ID believer defends his theory, seeking to conceal flaws." -Roger Ebert

Glory's Sun

all I know is google owes me a ton of money

bobby

god bless the internet for .......FREE pOrn !!!

xoxoxoo

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Moskie

I'm a bit late here, but this:


made me lawl. good job.

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Willy

Be careful, if she knows about the SafeSearch filter on Google image search you could be screwed.

fatbob

i just get cartoon characters on page 2/3...

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aabbccbbaa2

haha, LOL... I tried as well

FallenAvatar

This post looks like communication gone wrong.

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Fetch me the spirit, the son and the father,
Tell them their pillar of faith has ascended.

MechCow

I'm with Halx. I come to this site when I'm not looking at porn, and it completely defeats the point if I spend my time reading about how you justify it to yourself.